Had I Known, I Would Never Have Accepted the Role of a Token Gay Friend

Contents:

• HAD I KNOWN, I WOULD NEVER HAVE ACCEPTED THE ROLE OF A TOKEN GAY FRIEND
• GAY MEN AND STRAIGHT MEN AS FRIENDS
• TOKEN GAY
• CAN GAY AND STRAIGHT MEN REALLY BE FRIENDS?

HAD I KNOWN, I WOULD NEVER HAVE ACCEPTED THE ROLE OF A TOKEN GAY FRIEND

Straight men who have engaged suatnal homosexualy (such as prison or the ary), what's your story? Is mon for straight people to do homoerotic thgs while dnk? For gay teenagers who have jt e out, n be nfg to thk about who to tell and tst their journey of disverg themselv.

But fdg the right circle of iends as a gay person Indonia isn’t as easy as the way Nia Data portrayed her movie Arisan. I went to a private Catholic school Indonia, not a iendly place for a young queer teenager wh homophobia still rampant.

GAY MEN AND STRAIGHT MEN AS FRIENDS

I was expected to give them tips on fashn; I was there so they uld troduce me as the gay iend their circle to their iends and fay.

Worse, the girls suffered wh a severe se of vert homophobia. Maybe I had better than most gay kids who stggled to make iends growg up. Also read: Beg Gay and Indonian: Appropriated but Margalized.

TOKEN GAY

So the moment there is an offer to be a part of a group of iends, we are more likely to accept, regardls of whether or not the offer is a genue act of iendship, or if we are only given a token role of a gay iend. But is never our job to te our straight unterpart regardg nate homophobia. Conversatns about homophobia wh straight people may end wh them feelg offend, bee they are a part of a systemic problem that has been opprsg queer people to beg wh.

Homophobia is fueled by beg a bystanr when queer people face daily repercsns, homophobia is fueled by “harmls” jok that validate non-hetero sexual orientatns, homophobia is fueled by the very existence of tradnal genr rol, which a heteropatriarchal untry like Indonia, is still somethg that is prerved religly. To talk about homophobia, means to brg up aga every sgle prejudice, reprsn, and abe that we have been subjected to. It’s a mentally labor practice to te our supposedly hetero iends about how feels to be a gay person, bee they would never relate wh anyway.

Now, the qutn is as a gay person: to what extent are we willg to be the “doll” of iends circl who only want to show you off as their GBF, while ntug to nigrate your wh subtle homophobic jok and ments? For gay teens who jt me out, might seem hard to fd a person who genuely wants be iends wh you. straight men beg jokgly gay wh each other - is this homophobic?

CAN GAY AND STRAIGHT MEN REALLY BE FRIENDS?

Straight guy here but was havg a bate wh someone who said that the way straight guys are jokgly "gay" wh each other is sentially makg homosexualy the butt of the joke, s makg jok about a mographic who as a straight male you nt unrstand their stggl/issu, and by makg the jok you're implyg to each other that s okay to make fun of gay people?

I see as straight men embracg homosexualy, makg themselv more fortable wh ? It isn't like the jok are " a gay man walks to a bar", we are the "butts" of the joke this sense, isn't makg fun of other gay men or homosexualy general? The polar oppose of Gay Bt Friend.

A straight-gay bt iend is a person who is straight, yet they have stereotypil gay-like quali. They stggle wh beg gay and straight at the same time, whout beg by-sexual.