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GAY BOY DRINKS
ABSTRACT: What mak a drk "gay"? Some say all tak is a name endg "ra" or "ti," while others specify the cln of chopped u and fanciful ratns. For the purpos of this experiment, the signatn and selectn of gay drks has been left to profsnals--real live bartenrs real live gay bars. HYPOTHESIS: Tt subject "Sanep" is a 37-year-old straight man who, his natural habat, enjoys Jim Beam on the rocks... * pee drink gay *
ABSTRACT: What mak a drk "gay"? For the purpos of this experiment, the signatn and selectn of gay drks has been left to profsnals--real live bartenrs real live gay bars. Will an eveng spent downg "gay drks" gay bars spire "Sanep" to nvert to homosexualy, however fleetgly?
MEANS AND METHODS: Our experiment began at the elegant Capol Hill gay bar Thumpers. Inlitely phemized as a "wrkle room, " Thumpers appeals largely to gay elrs, boastg not only a full-service bar, but also an upsle dg room and performanc by jazz pianists. The subject's first "gay drk" of the night was a Grape Nehi (2 oz vodka, 2 oz raspberry liqur, lemon, blend wh ice), given an extra splash of gay by our acmodatg bartenr, who crowned the drk wh a spear of marascho cherri and a paper umbrella.
As he imbibed drk number two--a Cabana Boy Rum Sunset (2 oz Cabana Boy m, 4 oz lemon-lime soda), scribed as "really, really sweet"--he gamely shared his "gayt" memori om childhood, om roller-skatg to the Village People to his once-passnate love for N. Wh gay drk number two down the hatch, the subject had bee noticeably tipsier; as we left Thumpers, he was sg broadly, and once on the street, he generoly gave a buck to a one-legged hobo. But was subject "Sanep" any gayer?
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As we walked to our send statn, I brought up the topic of homosexualy, and got a dose of booze-fueled ndor: "I've sucked some dick, " the subject announced, gog on to reunt his llege-era dallianc wh those of his own sex.
Next we me to the stylish dance club Blu, where the iendly boy-tenr answered my ll for "the gayt drk the hoe" by whippg up an Aquapolan (3 oz orange-lemon aquav, 1 oz Grand Marnier, dash of orange juice, splash of cranberry juice/sour mix), which the subject scribed as "good" and "slhy. " Wh the ck-smokg t out of the bag, I prsed the creasgly ebriated subject for more tails of his homosexual episos. " After I got the subject his send Aquapolan, we retired to Blu's roof, where the full impact of the eveng's many "gay drks" beme evint as subject gamely stripped off his shirt (see Figure 9).
When subject "Sanep" was aga fully clothed, I led him to our fal gay waterg hole--the legendary Seattle Eagle, where the men are manly, the mic's rockg, and drks are served excsively butch Mason jars. The subject was now so toxited that we were talkg eely about a number of ep, profoundly personal topics, all of which revealed nothg about the subject's potential for gayns and are therefore of no value here. It wasn't Lowell, but the subject's abily to intify someone who "looks like Christopher Lowell" hted at hidn gay pths.
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Immediately I realized the benefs of gay drks--namely, a dnkenns remarkable s sociabily. Compared to his howlgly dnk fellow subjects (ma to drk everythg om hobo we to "at boy" shots), my gay-drks subject was the mol of rtraed toxitn--speakg at an acceptable volume, punchg no one, pg nowhere. CONCLUSION: Gay drks do not spire homosexualy.
In fact, wh the rtraed, sociable toxitn they provoke, gay drks are ls likely to fuel homosexualy than other, meaner drks (see "Sean"'s kissg cint below).