Jaguars associate strength ach Kev Maxen out as gay a first for US-based pro leagu

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Kev Spacey said he was 'prsured' to e out as gay after beg acced of sexual misnduct.

Contents:

THE GAY-FRIENDLY CI HAVE LOTS TO OFFER LGBTQ BUYERS—INCLUDG AFFORDABLE HOM

A gay Christian speaks to fundamentalists * coming home gay *

To beg to tell the story of the 65 gay and lbian fai I terviewed for the book Comg Out, Comg Home: Helpg Fai Adjt to a Gay or Lbian Child () mak the most sense to start at the end--bee there is good news about how fai n eventually bee more open, warmer, and closer after is learned that a child is gay or lbian. Parents n go om feelg rejectg, guilty, mournful, and ightened to not only acceptg but prizg their gay or lbian child--and for kids, pecially gay kids, nothg feels better than to bask the warm glow of a parent's love and approval. The mothers and fathers nfid a tsted iend, a gay acquatance, or an open-md relative, and some went to a special (and que wonrful) support group for parents lled PFLAG (Parents, Fai, and Friends of Lbians and Gays) Talkg to the knowledgeable, nonjudgmental people helped parents navigate a mefield of paful emotns and realize that was not their flt that their children were gay, and that their sons and dghter uld still live happy, productive liv.

The important alli gave parents hope--- but at the same time warned them that if they did not learn to accept their gay children, they ran the risk of losg them forever. Many of the mothers and fathers this book scribed that although they were dismayed to learn their children were gay, when they realized how well their children were dog and how happy they were, they began to thk "How bad n really be?

JAGUARS ASSOCIATE STRENGTH ACH KEV MAXEN OUT AS GAY A FIRST FOR US-BASED PRO LEAGU

The disvery that a child is lbian or gay n send shockwav through a fay. A mother will qutn how she's raised her son; a father will worry that ... | CUP * coming home gay *

1) When children acted "too gay" meang that they showed mannerisms of the oppose sex.

JAGS' MAXEN IS FIRST MALE AMERIN PRO SPORTS ACH TO E OUT AS GAY

A gay Christian speaks to fundamentalists. * coming home gay *

For others, pg wh beg gay or lbian was jt too much-and the troubled kids were referred to profsnal psychotherapists. Neverthels, if you are a parent the throws of disverg your son or dghter is gay or lbian-or if you are a child who is ntemplatg g out, or have jt e out and your fay is reelg-don't spair--there is hope!

RH, “AN ALL NEW GAY BAR” G TO SHAW, POSTS LIQUOR LICENSE PLARD

The disvery that a child is lbian or gay n send shockwavthrough a fay. A mother will qutn how she's raised her son;a father will worry that ... * coming home gay *

If a person choos a gay child and really workg wh n be the biggt growth experience of your own life bee forc you to stretch stretch your unrstandg of what love is.

After g out as gay, Colton Unrwood is sharg his journey a new Netflix documentary.

Gay.

KEV SPACEY FELT ‘PRSURED TO E OUT AS GAY’ AFTER SEXUAL MISNDUCT ALLEGATNS

Jacksonville Jaguars associate strength ach Kev Maxen has e out as gay. * coming home gay *

Osborne announced he is gay. Osborne told Time magaze Febary that he is gay and has known for years, but he kept a secret bee of untry mic's mostly nservative fan base. It's tougher for Black gay men.

It's tougher for Black mascule gay women. Ronen Rubste's gay character on "9-1-1: Lone Star" helped him get fortable wh his own sexualy. "I me out as gay before I transned.

I me out as transgenr and then I me out as gay aga, " she said a YouTube vio April. Former "Bachelor" star Colton Unrwood me out as gay on "Good Morng Ameri.

KEV MAXEN BE FIRST MALE ACH A US MEN’S PROFSNAL SPORTS LEAGUE TO PUBLICLY E OUT AS GAY

Jaguars assistant Kev Maxen has bee the first male ach major Amerin men's pro sports to publicly e out as gay, tellg he ma the cisn bee he didn't want to hi who he is any longer. * coming home gay *

"And I'm gay. I am proud to be gay.

Rogers, who retired 2019, said when she moved to the town 33 years ago, there was a cursy about her liftyle, along wh blatant homophobia.

1923 9th Street, NW Last week we learned that: "RUSH—an all new gay bar g soon to 9th & U!" The liquor license plard says: "The Establishment will be a Tavern offerg an upsle cktail lounge experience wh a Total Occupancy Load of 188 and seatg for 67 to clu a Siwalk Café wh a * coming home gay *

Read here what the Catholic Church says about homosexuals and homosexual clatns. God lls each of , whether homosexual or heterosexual, to chasty acrdg to our circumstanc life.

One helpful and effective mistry helpg homosexual believers is Courage.

* coming home gay *

To learn more about homosexualy light of the Church’s teachgs, please explore the followg rourc.

*BEAR-MAGAZINE.COM* COMING HOME GAY

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lg:!mx-to"> <img width="275" height="225" class="lazy round-lg" data-src=" srcset=" 480w, 1000w, 4000w" alt="article image"/> <div class="photo_cred"><span>image by © Koren Shadmi 2010, Levy Creative Management, NYC</span></div> </div></div></div> </div> <article id="article_ntent" class="prose prose-primary prose-base md:prose-lg prose-headgs:font-semibold prt:prose-sm text-[#222222] marker:text-[#222222] max-w-none mx-to lg:mx-36"> <p>Last year I got a ll om an admistrator at a Midwtern semary wh a reputatn for s take-no-prisoners nservative theology. He had permissn to nduct a seri of semars on hot-button issu like abortn, stem-cell rearch, and gay marriage. His plan was to brg a succsn of speakers, one to take the pro si of an issue, followed by a send to prent the opposg view.</p><p>I took a ep breath. I knew what was g next. “We want you to take the pro si on homosexualy,” he said.</p><p><i>Yippee</i>, I thought. <i>I get to argue for Satan</i>.</p><p><span class="3-wordtrosans">Several years earlier </span>I had given a readg on the same mp. It was om my novel, <i>The View om Delphi</i>. I hadn’t e out as gay then, only as a Baptist. Years before, I ma the cisn that the only time I should feel obligated to reveal my sexual orientatn was when there was somethg posive for me–like a quick way to get rid of a Jehovah’s Wns.</p><p>“Why me?” I asked the ller.</p><p>“Actually,” he said. “I heard you were gay before you showed up.”</p><p>It turns out that the an had done his bt to ncel my prev readg. I had not known at the time that my gay prence was sufficient to e a sndal. What would happen if I were to actually talk about ?</p><p>The admistrator plead his se. “I want you to e here not only bee you’re gay, but bee you’re relig. You’ve obvly held on to your spirual beliefs.”</p><p>I didn’t tell him I’d been able to reta my fah by steerg clear of the hateful fundamentalists that universi like his turned out. Instead, I lied and told him I’d thk about .</p><p>“Well, I n’t blame you if you say no,” he said. “In fact, I might lose my job over askg you. But I thk ’s worth .”</p><p><i>Great</i>, I thought. <i>He’ll get fired and I’ll get ccified</i>. Who uld refe an offer like that?</p><p>The people at this particular school were the same relig fanatics I had fled Mississippi as a young man. I knew already how ssns like the uld turn out: each si g every trick s holy book to stroy the spirual legimacy of the other si. And even on those ocsns when I got the better of my opponents public bat about gay rights and gay marriage, I me to realize that few mds had been changed, and that some hearts had actually harned.</p><p>Still, the admistrator’s requt tugged at me. Thomas Wolfe famoly wrote, “You n’t go home aga.” Well, perhaps Wolfe was only half right. You n never go home aga, but you n never leave pletely, eher. I spect the unfished stori of home will hnt all until the day we die, creatg a never-endg succsn of possibili to get right. To say “to hell wh you” and slam the door isn’t healthy closure, yet that’s how I had exed my Christian muny Mississippi.</p><p>I cid I would say no to the requt, but I uldn’t tell my ntact that I was really clg his vatn bee I was terrified of beg rejected. After all, I was apparently the only homosexual he had e across who actually believed God. So I did what I ually do when I need to make a purely emotnal cisn appear ratnal: I turned to Google.</p><p>I entered the name of the school and the word <i>homosexualy</i> to the search enge. My aim was to fd a way to blame the fundamentalist Christians for beg so hopels that I wasn’t gog to waste my time on them.</p><p>The first h was an anonymo letter, wrten by one of the semary’s own stunts to a gay support group, pleadg for help. He wrote about beg a Christian, a closeted gay, and sui­cidal. “From the outsi, I appear much like any other stunt on mp,” he wrote. “I am a Christian, dited to my fay, my iends, and my amic reer. . . . I am also gay.”</p><p>“I me close to mtg suici several tim, but God had been lookg out for me. He had given me one iend on this mp, one person who I uld be totally hont wh. I believe that were not for him, I would not be here today.”</p><p>“But most importantly, I hope that we n be seen for who we tly are, as fellow brothers and sisters Christ.”</p><p>This stunt’s poignant ttimony of speratn and isolatn, his love for a church that rejects him, the brought me back to my own youth. As a boy, I too was sperate for some adult to say, “I know jt how you feel. I was aaid, too. But look at me. I survived. So will you.” I uldn’t refe an vatn to speak whout rejectg this young man or that kid si me who is still wag for an adult to stand up for him.</p><p>For the first time, I would be showg up to speak at an event as a “profsnal homosexual.” I would no longer be charge of how, when, or whether I me out. The only thg people would know about me beforehand is that I am gay. To them, I would reprent all their feelgs and judgments about gay folks, a cumulative rponse over which I had no ntrol. I was stumped about how to beg.</p><p>A participant a workshop I lead lled “Darg to Tell Your Story” helped me clarify my thkg. “Don’t bate them,” Betsy advised. “Jt tell your story and let them tell you theirs, like we do class.”</p><p>As we say a sobriety program I attend, “Simple, but not easy.”</p><p>As a gay man, I have several versns of my story, pendg on what the ocsn might ll for. There is the polil “I pay tax, too” versn, and the religly challengg “J never mentned ” versn. I have an aggrieved “Look how you’ve opprsed me” prentatn, and a ant “I’m queer and get over ” one.</p><p>Betsy was suggtg somethg different: that I get beyond the urge to e my story as a strategy. Instead, as wrer John Cournos advis, I should relate my personal tth to a more universal one, what theologian Miroslav Volf lls “a moral obligatn to remember tthfully.” That means tellg my story whout embellishg , tidyg up, or turng to a moraly play wh clear-cut villas, victims, and sats. It meant cludg unrolved tensns, even if my doubts and mistak would give others ammunn to e agast me.</p><p><span class="3-wordtrosans">When I walked </span>to the podium that night the place was only partially filled. Most the dience were faculty and female stunts. Hangg the back was a crowd of young guys who eyed me spicly, still cidg whether this talk was for them, and what exactly their attendance might say about their own ttosterone levels. I nervoly blurted out the first thg that me to my md.</p><p>“Hello, I’m the gay guy!”</p><p>It was meant to be humoro, but the silence was so thorough that I uld hear them breathg. <i>OK</i>, I told myself, <i>don’t be clever. Jt tell the tth. If they walk out, they walk out</i>. I began aga.</p><p>“When I got the vatn to e speak today, was a no-braer.” I looked directly at the young men massed the back of the room: “Not a ln years!” I noticed a few smirks. At least we shared some mon ground. We all would rather be somewhere else.</p><p>“I’d like to say I’m happy to be here today,” I ntued, “but I’d be startg our relatnship wh a lie. Right now, you are the folks I grew up wh. The folks I fled over 30 ago and have kept nng om. You were my first fay, and fai know how to wound you the ept. So today I jt need to say that I’m not here bee I want to nvert you, or change you, or sway you, or make you like me. I’m here bee, whether I like or not, you are my life and I need to somehow make peace wh that part of my life.”</p><p>Then I told them that <i>peace</i> is the last word I would e to scribe such foms. All we seem to learn om such exchang is how to fight one another better the next time. Y, I told the dience, I did want gay marriage. I told them how much I love my partner, Jim, but that I was jt about through wh public ntroversy. I explaed that was a Google search on this semary and homosexualy that had changed my md about speakg, specifilly the anonymo letter om a stunt at their universy.</p><p>I noticed that people began lookg furtively at one another, as if the thor might be the room. I told the dience about this stunt’s fear and prsn, his thoughts of suici. I scribed his sire to walk wh his brothers and sisters Christ, but also his terror at what might happen if they ever found out who he was. I told them that what he wrote rang te to my own experience growg up a Christian muny. The last thg on his md was the gay-marriage bate. He was operatg survival mo. That’s why I accepted their vatn to speak.</p><p>We were all breathg differently now. Even the guys the back had nonchalantly drifted to the room. Others, who had been listeng om the hallway, began to file si, until fally all the chairs were filled and people stood lg the walls.</p><p>I told them of my own journey to adulthood as a gay man, as a profsnal, a Christian “wh all the answers.” I told them how my life llapsed when I me to the realizatn that my answers were right, but I had spent all those years askg the wrong qutns. Then I told them my story of beg a Southern gay Christian alholic or, as a iend puts , a queer, Bible-bangg, redneck dnk. It was the first time I had let all the refully segregated, ntradictory parts of my history loose a sgle place at the same time.</p><p>I end by sharg a story about my nservative, fundamentalist father. It was the day I fally asked him if he thought I was gog to hell. “Johnny,” he said, “I believe every word the Bible is God’s leral tth, and the way I read , says homosexualy is wrong.” He ntued, “And I know my son. I know for a fact that he is not evil.” He nodd once, and then said cisively, “I gus both are gog to have to be te.”</p><p>A sign of geni, someone said, is the abily to hold two ntradictory thoughts your md at the same time. I told the stunts that my father had died the year before. “I’m not sure I ever lived up to his expectatns,” I said. “I know I haven’t lived up to me. But has been a fort to know that there uld be a God who don’t hold that agast me–who n say, ‘You have failed and you are perfect.’ I gus both will have to be te.”</p><p>As I said this, I found myself fightg back tears. <i>How strange</i>, I thought, <i>that I have never felt closer to my late father than standg before this group of fundamentalist Christians</i>.</p><p>The talk took about 50 mut. When was over, a pall of silence hung over the room. Then a few people started to clap, then a few more. Someone stood, and whether was ntag enthiasm or peer prsure, I received a standg ovatn. <i>Oh, great</i>, I uldn’t help thkg, <i>now they feel sorry for me</i>.</p><p>But somethg tertg happened durg the Q and A. The qutns were not the on I had expected. Instead, stunts asked thoughtfully about my life and my stggle wh relign. “How do you as a gay man experience the prence of Christ your life?” “How do you handle Christians who reject you whout knowg your story?” “If your parents had not accepted you, what do you thk you would have done?”</p><p>The queri were not accatory, but timate and vg. I was able to talk of my stggl, of my own ambivalence about a topic that is ually prented only black and whe, pro and n. It was their obv ncern for me as a person and a Christian that allowed me to go ep wh myself to rpond.</p><p>And then there were no more qutns–only a flood of stori. Some told tearfully of brothers and sisters who are gay, and whom they had been tght to reject. Others told how iends had e out to them, and how poorly equipped they felt when me to offerg support. About how the admonn to “hate the s but love the sner” proved woefully aquate when the sner happened to be a person they red for eply.</p><p>I unrstood the dynamic–how story elics story–but I had not anticipated the monaly of the stori told that eveng. They were sharg wh me how they had also been wound by their relign’s tolerance toward homosexuals. Carg and ialistic, the young people still believed that love has the power to remake the world. It hurt them to be asked to mistst their ept stcts, the on that had led them to mistry.</p><p><span class="3-wordtrosans">I would like to say everybody volved</span> went on to live happily ever after, but life don’t work that way. A few profsors whose stunts were at the ssn plaed to the an about my beg allowed to speak. Some of the semarians attendg the ssn cid to ph for a mp support group for iends of the GLBT muny. The an, alarmed, charged a mtee to create a list of faculty and stunts who challenged the stutn’s policy on homosexualy.</p><p>Was worth ? For the stutn, I hope so. I don’t know whether the urageo man who ved me will keep his job, or what he might have to do to reta . I’m fairly certa I will not be asked to speak aga anytime soon. As I feared, the stunt body may have bee even more polarized over the issue than before. But was worth for me as a Christian.</p><p>In the most unlikely of plac, I had experienced a g home. Such a g home is not a matter of nqut or retributn, of fally gettg the love, rpect, or apologi that are your due. Rather, simply by tellg your story, your tth, whout the expectatn of ga or the dread of loss, you are set ee. I me away wh a new unrstandg of the old sayg that while facts n help expla , only stori n save –and, I hope, others.</p><p><i>Jonathan Oll is a wrer, motivatnal speaker, and thor of the novel</i> The View om Delphi<i>. This article origally appeared </i> Commonweal<i> (Jan. 15, 2010), a vibrant, thought-provokg opn journal and a 2010 Utne Inpennt Prs Award</i><i></i><i>nomee for spirual verage.</i><b><i><a href=" target="_blank"></a></i></b></p> </article> <div id="related_articl_panel" class="hidn"><div class="clear-both w-full lg:w-[300px] lg:float-left mr-6 mb-4 bg-gray-50 round-lg divi-y divi-gray-200 prt:hidn"><div class="flex flex-l mt-0 py-3 px-4 lg:leadg-loose"><span class="p-0 m-0 text-xl lg:text-[1.35rem] lg:leadg-[1.85rem] font-bold text-primary">Related Articl</span></div><div class="divi-y divi-gray-200"><a href=" class="block p-4 !no-unrle hover:bg-gray-100 group first:round-bl-lg last:round-br-lg"> <div class="grid grid-ls-4 gap-3"> <div class="l-span-1"> <div class="aspect-w-6 aspect-h-4 lg:aspect-w-3 lg:aspect-h-3"> <img class="lazy w-full h-full object-ver round-lg bg-gray-300 !m-0 !p-0" alt="An Unual O to Home" data-src="> </div> </div> <div class="l-span-3 flex flex-l"> <span class="text-base text-gray-600 leadg-tight font-semibold le-clamp-2">An Unual O to Home</span> <span class="text-sm text-gray-400 le-clamp-2">In "God Help Thee: A Manifto," thor and playwright Joel Thomas Hyn do a lot of trash-talkg about Newfoundland. 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