Geics May Determe if Gay Men Are Tops or Bottoms

Contents:

• HOW GAY COUPL WH THE SAME POSNAL PREFERENC MAKE IT WORK"I’M CERTALY NOT TOPPG, SO WHAT ARE WE GOG TO DO?"{FONT:NORMAL 800 1.2REM/1.2 "D BOLD",SANS-SERIF;TEXT-TRANSFORM:NORMAL;LOR:HER;DISPLAY:LE-BLOCK;PADDG-BOTTOM:6PX;POSN:RELATIVE;TEXT-TRANSFORM:UPPERSE;}{BACKGROUND:#89308A;BOTTOM:0;NTENT:'';DISPLAY:BLOCK;HEIGHT:2PX;LEFT:0;POSN:ABSOLUTE;RIGHT:0;-WEBK-TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;WIDTH:100%;}{LEFT:51%;RIGHT:51%;WIDTH:0;}{FONT:NORMAL 800 1.2REM/1.2 "D BOLD",SANS-SERIF;TEXT-TRANSFORM:NORMAL;LOR:HER;DISPLAY:LE-BLOCK;PADDG-BOTTOM:6PX;POSN:RELATIVE;TEXT-TRANSFORM:UPPERSE;}{BACKGROUND:#89308A;BOTTOM:0;NTENT:'';DISPLAY:BLOCK;HEIGHT:2PX;LEFT:0;POSN:ABSOLUTE;RIGHT:0;-WEBK-TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;WIDTH:100%;}{LEFT:51%;RIGHT:51%;WIDTH:0;}LIFEBY BOBBY BOXMARCH 4, 2021/1:27 {HEIGHT:HER;DISPLAY:-WEBK-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-FLEX;DISPLAY:-MS-FLEXBOX;DISPLAY:FLEX;POSN:RELATIVE;-WEBK-FLEX-WRAP:WRAP;-MS-FLEX-WRAP:WRAP;FLEX-WRAP:WRAP;-WEBK-ALIGN-EMS:CENTER;-WEBK-BOX-ALIGN:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-ALIGN:CENTER;ALIGN-EMS:CENTER;-WEBK-BOX-PACK:CENTER;-WEBK-JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-PACK:CENTER;JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-WEBK-TRANSFORM-ORIG:CENTER;-MS-TRANSFORM-ORIG:CENTER;TRANSFORM-ORIG:CENTER;} IMG{HEIGHT:100%;WIDTH:100%;OBJECT-F:VER;}{HEIGHT:3840PX;WIDTH:5760PX;}GETTY3D RENRG, BANANAS WH FAKE EYELASH AND A UPLE BACKWARDS POSNBY BOBBY BOXMARCH 4, 2021 / 1:27 PM{"@NTEXT":","@TYPE":"NEWSARTICLE","HEADLE":"HOW GAY COUPL WH THE SAME POSNAL PREFERENC MAKE IT WORK","THUMBNAILURL":","DATEPUBLISHED":"2021-03-04T18:27:58.000+0000","DATEMODIFIED":"2021-03-04T18:27:58.000+0000","IMAGE":{"@NTEXT":","@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT","URL":","WIDTH":1920,"HEIGHT":1080},"URL":","THOR":{"@TYPE":"ORGANIZATN","NAME":"LOGO TV"},"MAENTYOFPAGE":{"@TYPE":"WEBPAGE","@ID":"},"PUBLISHER":{"@TYPE":"ORGANIZATN","@ID":","NAME":"LOGO TV","URL":","LOGO":{"@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT"}},"CREATOR":"BOBBY BOX","KEYWORDS":"LOVE AND SEX","ARTICLESECTN":"LIFE"}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}PICTURE THIS: YOU’RE ON A DATE THAT IS GOG EXTRAORDARILY WELL. THE CHEMISTRY IS PALPABLE, AND YOU’RE EXCED TO BRG THEM BACK TO YOUR APARTMENT, WHICH YOU’VE CLEANED FOR THE OCSN. OVER DNER, HOWEVER, YOU NOTICE THEY HAVEN’T TOUCHED THEIR FOOD, ELECTG TO MUNCH ON THE ICE CHIPS THEIR GLASS STEAD. THAT’S WHEN HS YOU: YOUR POTENTIAL SOULMATE IS A BOTTOM — AND SO ARE {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}POSNAL POLICS N BE A TERMG FACTOR QUEER RELATNSHIPS, SOMETHG MOST HETEROSEXUAL PEOPLE N'T RELATE TO (ALTHOUGH AS PEGGG BE MORE NORMALIZED THANKS TO MEDIA LIKE BROAD CY, THE L ARE BEG BLURRED AS WELL). UNLS EXPLICLY STATED ON AN APP OR PERSON, WE HAVE NO WAY OF TERMG WHETHER SOMEONE PREFERS TO PCH, TCH, OR {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}SO, WHAT DO ONE DO SUCH A PREDIMENT? DO YOU GIVE UP AND GHOST OR GAMBLE AND EXPLORE THE CHEMISTRY FURTHER? I POSED THIS QUTN ON TWTER, AND OF THE 200-PL VOTERS WHO RPOND, 75% SAID THAT THEY WOULD SERLY NSIR DATG SOMEBODY WH WHOM THEY SHARED A POSNAL {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-FLEX;DISPLAY:-MS-FLEXBOX;DISPLAY:FLEX;-WEBK-BOX-PACK:CENTER;-WEBK-JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-PACK:CENTER;JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;} .TWTER-TWEET-RENRED, {M-WIDTH:65%;WIDTH:TO !IMPORTANT;} {WIDTH:100%;} {MARG-LEFT:TO !IMPORTANT;MARG-RIGHT:TO !IMPORTANT;} IMG{MAX-WIDTH:100%;WIDTH:100%;} > IAME{BORR:NONE;MAX-WIDTH:100%;} > *{MAX-WIDTH:NONE !IMPORTANT;}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}“I WOULD NEVER DATE ANOTHER BOTTOM UNLS THEY’VE CHECKED OFF ALL OF THE OTHER BOX I REQUIRE A MAN,” ZACH, A 30-YEAR-OLD BOTTOM WHO VOTED NO, TELLS NEWNOWNEXT. “SEX IS IMPORTANT TO ME A RELATNSHIP, AND I’M CERTALY NOT TOPPG, SO WHAT ARE WE GOG TO DO?”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}SAM, 29, HAS A MORE VALIER ATTU. “I’VE SPENT THE LAST 12 MONTHS WH NOTHG BUT TOYS, SO I’M PRETTY SURE I ULD PE,” HE SHAR. “PERATIVE SEX ISN’T ALL THAT ANYWAYS.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}TODD BARATZ, A LICENSED DIVIDUAL AND UPL' THERAPIST, AGRE. “THERE IS SO MUCH FOC ON PERATN, AND ’S OFTEN AT THE EXPENSE OF A VARIETY OF DIFFERENT PLEASURABLE SEXUAL EXPERIENC, OM MUTUAL MASTURBATN TO ORAL,” HE TELLS NEWNOWNEXT. “SOMETIM ’S NOT POSSIBLE TO FUCK (FOR A NUMBER OF REASONS), AND SOMETIM WE FALL LOVE WH SOMEONE WHO HAS A SIAR PERATIVE PREFERENCE.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}PIERCE, 25, AND ROBERT, 23, WHO BOTH INTIFY AS TOTAL TOPS, ARE PRIME EXAMPL. THE PAIR MATCHED ON TR DURG THE PANMIC AND DATED VIRTUALLY FOR A FEW MONTHS BEFORE THEY FELT WAS SAFE TO MEET PERSON. WHILE THEIR PERATIVE PREFERENCE WAS NOT MENTNED EHER OF THEIR PROFIL, THE TWO HAD TALKED ABOUT THEIR SEXUAL PROCLIVI PRR TO MAKG THGS {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}“ROBERT EXPLAED WHY HE WAS UNFORTABLE BOTTOMG AND TOOK ME TO A TRMATIC PLACE WHERE I WAS FORCED TO BOTTOM WHEN I DIDN’T WANT TO. AFTER WE EXCHANGED THIS VULNERABLE RMATN WH EACH OTHER, OUR PRRI SHIFTED, AND WE CID THAT OUR MUTUAL FORT WAS MOST IMPORTANT,” PIERCE TELLS NEWNOWNEXT. “I’LL ADM I HAD A DIFFICULT TIME CUMMG AT FIRST AND STILL DO OM TIME TO TIME. I’M JT NOT ED TO FOREPLAY LEADG TO — WHAT I NSIRED AT THE TIME — JT MORE FOREPLAY.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}GIVEN THAT PERATN WAS OFF THE TABLE, THE TWO ACTIVELY EXPLORED EACH OTHER’S KKS. PIERCE DISVERED THAT HE BEME REALLY TURNED ON WHEN ROBERT TOOK ON THE DOMANT ROLE AND WAS RELIEVED TO FD THAT THIS DYNAMIC ULD BE ACHIEVED WHOUT PERATN. "I’VE GROWN TO REALIZE THAT PERATIVE SEX DON’T HAVE TO BE A HUGE PART OF PHYSIL ATTRACTN,” HE SAYS, “AND WE’VE MANAGED TO SHOW OUR LOVE AND AFFECTN THROUGH OTHER MEANS.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}HAMPTON, 26, MET JARED, 27, AT A HOLIDAY PARTY HOSTED BY A MUTUAL IEND MORE THAN TWO YEARS AGO. AFTER A NIGHT OF HEAVY FLIRTG, THE TWO SCHLED A DATE THE NEXT DAY AND HAVE BEEN TOGETHER EVER SCE. BOTH INTIFY AS TOPS BUT SIST THAT HAS NEVER BEEN AN ISSUE THEIR {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}“HE’S BOTTOMED FOR ME A UPLE OF TIM AND I’VE TRIED TO BOTTOM FOR HIM, BUT J, HE’S TOO BIG,” HAMPTON ADMS. “WE STILL HAVE FUN TRYG. WE’VE MA A HAB OF MUNITG OUR SEXUAL NEEDS WH EACH OTHER AND ENJOY OTHER WAYS OF GETTG OFF TOGETHER, WHETHER THAT’S MUTUAL MASTURBATN, THREOM, AND SO ON.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}SIAR TO PIERCE, JARED HELPED HAMPTON EXPAND HIS MD BEYOND THE LIMATNS OF PERATIVE SEX. “HE MA CLEAR THAT DATG SOMEONE WHO IS A BOTTOM IS LS IMPORTANT THAN FDG SOMEONE HE TLY LIK AS A PERSON AND WANTS TO DATE,” HE SHAR. “HE’S SHOWED ME THERE ARE MANY WAYS TO HAVE FUN SEX THAT DON’T REQUIRE PERATN.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}“I LIKE TO ENURAGE PEOPLE TO HAVE A DIVERSE VTMENT STRATEGY THEIR SEXUALY,” ADDS BARATZ, THE LICENSED THERAPIST. “THE MORE THGS YOU ENJOY, THE MORE EXPANSIVE YOUR SEXUALY N BE. HOT SEX ISN’T BASED ON THE SEXUAL ACT. IT’S BASED ON SEXUAL CHEMISTRY, NNECTN, EROTICISM, AND MORE. YOU N HAVE PERATIVE SEX AND N BE REALLY BORG, SO ’S NOT THE END-ALL BE-ALL.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}ALL OF , REGARDLS OF SEXUAL ORIENTATN, HAVE TERNALIZED SCRIPTS ABOUT PERATN BEG THE NCLUDG SEXUAL ACT. BUT THE SCRIPTS STEM OM CISGENR, HETEROSEXUAL TERURSE THAT PRRIZ PROCREATN. WHEN QUEERS CENTER OR FE OUR SEXUALY AROUND PERATN, WE PERPETUATE THE LIMG AND OUTDATED NOTNS OF WHAT SEX “SHOULD” LOOK LIKE EVEN IF WE DON’T MEAN TO.GETTY IMAGPHOTO TAKEN GRANADA, {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}WHEN WORKG WH UPL WHO SEEK ALTERNATIV TO PERATIVE SEX, BARATZ URG EACH PERSON TO MAKE AN EFFORT TO BETTER UNRSTAND THEIR PARTNER’S TURN-ONS (SOMETHG HE SAYS MANY UPL DON’T KNOW, BUT THK THEY DO) SO THEY N BETTER PLEASURE THEM OTHER WAYS. “TAKE TURNS GIVG, RECEIVG, AND TAKG PLEASURE — WH NSENT, OF URSE,” HE SAYS. “EXPLORE FANTASI, MASSAGE, ROLE-PLAY, AND WHATEVER ELSE YOU BOTH FD EROTIC AND EXCG.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}IF WORKG ON THGS WH THE RELATNSHIP STILL ISN’T HTG THE MARK, NSENSUAL NON-MONOGAMY IS ANOTHER OPTN. REARCH HAS FOUND MORE THAN 40% OF GAY MEN HAVE AN AGREEMENT THAT SEX OUTSI OF THEIR RELATNSHIP IS PERMISSIBLE PARED TO LS THAN 5% OF HETEROSEXUAL AND LBIAN {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}“AS I EVOLVED TO POLYAMORY, POSNAL PREFERENCE ISN’T MUCH OF AN ISSUE WHEN FDG A PARTNER. IT’S ACTUALLY PRETTY LOW ON MY LIST,” ROBBIE, 35, TELLS NEWNOWNEXT. “THE BT WAY AROUND THE ISSUE OF TWO TOPS IS TO BE OPEN AND TO SHARE A BOTTOM, OR VICE VERSA. ONCE YOU REMOVE SEX OM BEG THE FOUNDATN OF A RELATNSHIP, YOU’RE ABLE TO SEE MORE CLEARLY AND NNECT ON EPER LEVELS.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}WHEN TO ANY PREFERENCE RELATNSHIPS, ’S BT TO BE FLEXIBLE AND ALLOW ROOM FOR OUR PARTNER’S PREFERENC EVEN IF THEY ARE AT ODDS WH OUR OWN. “IF I DIDN’T LIKE BASEBALL AND MY PARTNER WAS OBSSED, I’D PROBABLY GO TO A GAME OR TWO WH THEM,” BARATZ SAYS. “SEX IS NO DIFFERENT. PLEASE YOUR PARTNER! NOT ONLY IS A GREAT WAY TO NNECT, BUT YOU MIGHT BE SURPRISED AND HAVE SOME FUN ALONG THE WAY.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;CLEAR:BOTH;}LOVE AND {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;MARG:0 TO;WIDTH:90%;M-WIDTH:288PX;MAX-WIDTH:1440PX;M-HEIGHT:194PX;}LATT NEWS
• BORN TO BOTTOM? REARCHERS REPORT BLOGIL CORRELATNS ANAL SEX ROLE GAY MEN
• GEICS MAY DETERME IF GAY MEN ARE TOPS OR BOTTOMS
• GAY MEN'S PREFERENC FOR "TOP" VS. "BOTTOM" CAN BE JUDGED BY THEIR FACE

HOW GAY COUPL WH THE SAME POSNAL PREFERENC MAKE IT WORK"I’M CERTALY NOT TOPPG, SO WHAT ARE WE GOG TO DO?"{FONT:NORMAL 800 1.2REM/1.2 "D BOLD",SANS-SERIF;TEXT-TRANSFORM:NORMAL;LOR:HER;DISPLAY:LE-BLOCK;PADDG-BOTTOM:6PX;POSN:RELATIVE;TEXT-TRANSFORM:UPPERSE;}{BACKGROUND:#89308A;BOTTOM:0;NTENT:'';DISPLAY:BLOCK;HEIGHT:2PX;LEFT:0;POSN:ABSOLUTE;RIGHT:0;-WEBK-TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;WIDTH:100%;}{LEFT:51%;RIGHT:51%;WIDTH:0;}{FONT:NORMAL 800 1.2REM/1.2 "D BOLD",SANS-SERIF;TEXT-TRANSFORM:NORMAL;LOR:HER;DISPLAY:LE-BLOCK;PADDG-BOTTOM:6PX;POSN:RELATIVE;TEXT-TRANSFORM:UPPERSE;}{BACKGROUND:#89308A;BOTTOM:0;NTENT:'';DISPLAY:BLOCK;HEIGHT:2PX;LEFT:0;POSN:ABSOLUTE;RIGHT:0;-WEBK-TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;WIDTH:100%;}{LEFT:51%;RIGHT:51%;WIDTH:0;}LIFEBY BOBBY BOXMARCH 4, 2021/1:27 {HEIGHT:HER;DISPLAY:-WEBK-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-FLEX;DISPLAY:-MS-FLEXBOX;DISPLAY:FLEX;POSN:RELATIVE;-WEBK-FLEX-WRAP:WRAP;-MS-FLEX-WRAP:WRAP;FLEX-WRAP:WRAP;-WEBK-ALIGN-EMS:CENTER;-WEBK-BOX-ALIGN:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-ALIGN:CENTER;ALIGN-EMS:CENTER;-WEBK-BOX-PACK:CENTER;-WEBK-JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-PACK:CENTER;JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-WEBK-TRANSFORM-ORIG:CENTER;-MS-TRANSFORM-ORIG:CENTER;TRANSFORM-ORIG:CENTER;} IMG{HEIGHT:100%;WIDTH:100%;OBJECT-F:VER;}{HEIGHT:3840PX;WIDTH:5760PX;}GETTY3D RENRG, BANANAS WH FAKE EYELASH AND A UPLE BACKWARDS POSNBY BOBBY BOXMARCH 4, 2021 / 1:27 PM{"@NTEXT":","@TYPE":"NEWSARTICLE","HEADLE":"HOW GAY COUPL WH THE SAME POSNAL PREFERENC MAKE IT WORK","THUMBNAILURL":","DATEPUBLISHED":"2021-03-04T18:27:58.000+0000","DATEMODIFIED":"2021-03-04T18:27:58.000+0000","IMAGE":{"@NTEXT":","@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT","URL":","WIDTH":1920,"HEIGHT":1080},"URL":","THOR":{"@TYPE":"ORGANIZATN","NAME":"LOGO TV"},"MAENTYOFPAGE":{"@TYPE":"WEBPAGE","@ID":"},"PUBLISHER":{"@TYPE":"ORGANIZATN","@ID":","NAME":"LOGO TV","URL":","LOGO":{"@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT"}},"CREATOR":"BOBBY BOX","KEYWORDS":"LOVE AND SEX","ARTICLESECTN":"LIFE"}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}PICTURE THIS: YOU’RE ON A DATE THAT IS GOG EXTRAORDARILY WELL. THE CHEMISTRY IS PALPABLE, AND YOU’RE EXCED TO BRG THEM BACK TO YOUR APARTMENT, WHICH YOU’VE CLEANED FOR THE OCSN. OVER DNER, HOWEVER, YOU NOTICE THEY HAVEN’T TOUCHED THEIR FOOD, ELECTG TO MUNCH ON THE ICE CHIPS THEIR GLASS STEAD. THAT’S WHEN HS YOU: YOUR POTENTIAL SOULMATE IS A BOTTOM — AND SO ARE {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}POSNAL POLICS N BE A TERMG FACTOR QUEER RELATNSHIPS, SOMETHG MOST HETEROSEXUAL PEOPLE N'T RELATE TO (ALTHOUGH AS PEGGG BE MORE NORMALIZED THANKS TO MEDIA LIKE BROAD CY, THE L ARE BEG BLURRED AS WELL). UNLS EXPLICLY STATED ON AN APP OR PERSON, WE HAVE NO WAY OF TERMG WHETHER SOMEONE PREFERS TO PCH, TCH, OR {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}SO, WHAT DO ONE DO SUCH A PREDIMENT? DO YOU GIVE UP AND GHOST OR GAMBLE AND EXPLORE THE CHEMISTRY FURTHER? I POSED THIS QUTN ON TWTER, AND OF THE 200-PL VOTERS WHO RPOND, 75% SAID THAT THEY WOULD SERLY NSIR DATG SOMEBODY WH WHOM THEY SHARED A POSNAL {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-FLEX;DISPLAY:-MS-FLEXBOX;DISPLAY:FLEX;-WEBK-BOX-PACK:CENTER;-WEBK-JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-PACK:CENTER;JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;} .TWTER-TWEET-RENRED, {M-WIDTH:65%;WIDTH:TO !IMPORTANT;} {WIDTH:100%;} {MARG-LEFT:TO !IMPORTANT;MARG-RIGHT:TO !IMPORTANT;} IMG{MAX-WIDTH:100%;WIDTH:100%;} > IAME{BORR:NONE;MAX-WIDTH:100%;} > *{MAX-WIDTH:NONE !IMPORTANT;}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}“I WOULD NEVER DATE ANOTHER BOTTOM UNLS THEY’VE CHECKED OFF ALL OF THE OTHER BOX I REQUIRE A MAN,” ZACH, A 30-YEAR-OLD BOTTOM WHO VOTED NO, TELLS NEWNOWNEXT. “SEX IS IMPORTANT TO ME A RELATNSHIP, AND I’M CERTALY NOT TOPPG, SO WHAT ARE WE GOG TO DO?”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}SAM, 29, HAS A MORE VALIER ATTU. “I’VE SPENT THE LAST 12 MONTHS WH NOTHG BUT TOYS, SO I’M PRETTY SURE I ULD PE,” HE SHAR. “PERATIVE SEX ISN’T ALL THAT ANYWAYS.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}TODD BARATZ, A LICENSED DIVIDUAL AND UPL' THERAPIST, AGRE. “THERE IS SO MUCH FOC ON PERATN, AND ’S OFTEN AT THE EXPENSE OF A VARIETY OF DIFFERENT PLEASURABLE SEXUAL EXPERIENC, OM MUTUAL MASTURBATN TO ORAL,” HE TELLS NEWNOWNEXT. “SOMETIM ’S NOT POSSIBLE TO FUCK (FOR A NUMBER OF REASONS), AND SOMETIM WE FALL LOVE WH SOMEONE WHO HAS A SIAR PERATIVE PREFERENCE.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}PIERCE, 25, AND ROBERT, 23, WHO BOTH INTIFY AS TOTAL TOPS, ARE PRIME EXAMPL. THE PAIR MATCHED ON TR DURG THE PANMIC AND DATED VIRTUALLY FOR A FEW MONTHS BEFORE THEY FELT WAS SAFE TO MEET PERSON. WHILE THEIR PERATIVE PREFERENCE WAS NOT MENTNED EHER OF THEIR PROFIL, THE TWO HAD TALKED ABOUT THEIR SEXUAL PROCLIVI PRR TO MAKG THGS {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}“ROBERT EXPLAED WHY HE WAS UNFORTABLE BOTTOMG AND TOOK ME TO A TRMATIC PLACE WHERE I WAS FORCED TO BOTTOM WHEN I DIDN’T WANT TO. AFTER WE EXCHANGED THIS VULNERABLE RMATN WH EACH OTHER, OUR PRRI SHIFTED, AND WE CID THAT OUR MUTUAL FORT WAS MOST IMPORTANT,” PIERCE TELLS NEWNOWNEXT. “I’LL ADM I HAD A DIFFICULT TIME CUMMG AT FIRST AND STILL DO OM TIME TO TIME. I’M JT NOT ED TO FOREPLAY LEADG TO — WHAT I NSIRED AT THE TIME — JT MORE FOREPLAY.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}GIVEN THAT PERATN WAS OFF THE TABLE, THE TWO ACTIVELY EXPLORED EACH OTHER’S KKS. PIERCE DISVERED THAT HE BEME REALLY TURNED ON WHEN ROBERT TOOK ON THE DOMANT ROLE AND WAS RELIEVED TO FD THAT THIS DYNAMIC ULD BE ACHIEVED WHOUT PERATN. "I’VE GROWN TO REALIZE THAT PERATIVE SEX DON’T HAVE TO BE A HUGE PART OF PHYSIL ATTRACTN,” HE SAYS, “AND WE’VE MANAGED TO SHOW OUR LOVE AND AFFECTN THROUGH OTHER MEANS.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}HAMPTON, 26, MET JARED, 27, AT A HOLIDAY PARTY HOSTED BY A MUTUAL IEND MORE THAN TWO YEARS AGO. AFTER A NIGHT OF HEAVY FLIRTG, THE TWO SCHLED A DATE THE NEXT DAY AND HAVE BEEN TOGETHER EVER SCE. BOTH INTIFY AS TOPS BUT SIST THAT HAS NEVER BEEN AN ISSUE THEIR {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}“HE’S BOTTOMED FOR ME A UPLE OF TIM AND I’VE TRIED TO BOTTOM FOR HIM, BUT J, HE’S TOO BIG,” HAMPTON ADMS. “WE STILL HAVE FUN TRYG. WE’VE MA A HAB OF MUNITG OUR SEXUAL NEEDS WH EACH OTHER AND ENJOY OTHER WAYS OF GETTG OFF TOGETHER, WHETHER THAT’S MUTUAL MASTURBATN, THREOM, AND SO ON.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}SIAR TO PIERCE, JARED HELPED HAMPTON EXPAND HIS MD BEYOND THE LIMATNS OF PERATIVE SEX. “HE MA CLEAR THAT DATG SOMEONE WHO IS A BOTTOM IS LS IMPORTANT THAN FDG SOMEONE HE TLY LIK AS A PERSON AND WANTS TO DATE,” HE SHAR. “HE’S SHOWED ME THERE ARE MANY WAYS TO HAVE FUN SEX THAT DON’T REQUIRE PERATN.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}“I LIKE TO ENURAGE PEOPLE TO HAVE A DIVERSE VTMENT STRATEGY THEIR SEXUALY,” ADDS BARATZ, THE LICENSED THERAPIST. “THE MORE THGS YOU ENJOY, THE MORE EXPANSIVE YOUR SEXUALY N BE. HOT SEX ISN’T BASED ON THE SEXUAL ACT. IT’S BASED ON SEXUAL CHEMISTRY, NNECTN, EROTICISM, AND MORE. YOU N HAVE PERATIVE SEX AND N BE REALLY BORG, SO ’S NOT THE END-ALL BE-ALL.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}ALL OF , REGARDLS OF SEXUAL ORIENTATN, HAVE TERNALIZED SCRIPTS ABOUT PERATN BEG THE NCLUDG SEXUAL ACT. BUT THE SCRIPTS STEM OM CISGENR, HETEROSEXUAL TERURSE THAT PRRIZ PROCREATN. WHEN QUEERS CENTER OR FE OUR SEXUALY AROUND PERATN, WE PERPETUATE THE LIMG AND OUTDATED NOTNS OF WHAT SEX “SHOULD” LOOK LIKE EVEN IF WE DON’T MEAN TO.GETTY IMAGPHOTO TAKEN GRANADA, {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}WHEN WORKG WH UPL WHO SEEK ALTERNATIV TO PERATIVE SEX, BARATZ URG EACH PERSON TO MAKE AN EFFORT TO BETTER UNRSTAND THEIR PARTNER’S TURN-ONS (SOMETHG HE SAYS MANY UPL DON’T KNOW, BUT THK THEY DO) SO THEY N BETTER PLEASURE THEM OTHER WAYS. “TAKE TURNS GIVG, RECEIVG, AND TAKG PLEASURE — WH NSENT, OF URSE,” HE SAYS. “EXPLORE FANTASI, MASSAGE, ROLE-PLAY, AND WHATEVER ELSE YOU BOTH FD EROTIC AND EXCG.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}IF WORKG ON THGS WH THE RELATNSHIP STILL ISN’T HTG THE MARK, NSENSUAL NON-MONOGAMY IS ANOTHER OPTN. REARCH HAS FOUND MORE THAN 40% OF GAY MEN HAVE AN AGREEMENT THAT SEX OUTSI OF THEIR RELATNSHIP IS PERMISSIBLE PARED TO LS THAN 5% OF HETEROSEXUAL AND LBIAN {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}“AS I EVOLVED TO POLYAMORY, POSNAL PREFERENCE ISN’T MUCH OF AN ISSUE WHEN FDG A PARTNER. IT’S ACTUALLY PRETTY LOW ON MY LIST,” ROBBIE, 35, TELLS NEWNOWNEXT. “THE BT WAY AROUND THE ISSUE OF TWO TOPS IS TO BE OPEN AND TO SHARE A BOTTOM, OR VICE VERSA. ONCE YOU REMOVE SEX OM BEG THE FOUNDATN OF A RELATNSHIP, YOU’RE ABLE TO SEE MORE CLEARLY AND NNECT ON EPER LEVELS.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}WHEN TO ANY PREFERENCE RELATNSHIPS, ’S BT TO BE FLEXIBLE AND ALLOW ROOM FOR OUR PARTNER’S PREFERENC EVEN IF THEY ARE AT ODDS WH OUR OWN. “IF I DIDN’T LIKE BASEBALL AND MY PARTNER WAS OBSSED, I’D PROBABLY GO TO A GAME OR TWO WH THEM,” BARATZ SAYS. “SEX IS NO DIFFERENT. PLEASE YOUR PARTNER! NOT ONLY IS A GREAT WAY TO NNECT, BUT YOU MIGHT BE SURPRISED AND HAVE SOME FUN ALONG THE WAY.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;CLEAR:BOTH;}LOVE AND {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;MARG:0 TO;WIDTH:90%;M-WIDTH:288PX;MAX-WIDTH:1440PX;M-HEIGHT:194PX;}LATT NEWS

Legend would have you believe that once you’ve earned your gay rd, a Harry Potter–like ceremony occurs where, stead of the Sortg Hat, a giant magil butt plug divis all gay men to two ho: tops or is clearly not the se, pecially for those people who nsir themselv versatile (HIYA). The two subdivisns have their own l, stereotyp, and -jok, and n sometim seem as if they’re at war wh each other, rather than both workg together for mutual sexual of this n make tryg different thgs dntg, pecially if you’re a baby gay venturg to this world for the first time. ”Miller argu that gay men should exame their relatnship wh power.

But I believe that many gay men pick one si, stick to , and that some of those dividuals choose toppg—you’ll have seen their profil markg them as “masc dom tops” on the apps—bee of s ti to tradnal Miller explas, there are outsi forc that, datg back to the ancient Greeks, have prevented gay men om tly diggg to what sexual behavrs we might actually enjoy. “What I mean by that, ” he says, “is that cultural forc wh the gay muny prize toppg over bottomg. “Wh bottomg there is the perceptn that you're givg up your masculy bee receivg a penis is somethg that women do, ” Miller Chris Whe, an expert health promotn and the director and prcipal vtigator of the Safe and Supportive Schools Project at the Gay-Straight Alliance Network San Francis, tak this one step further.

”To be (fucked) or not to be (fucked) shouldn’t always be the qutnAcrdg to a 2011 study by The Journal of Sexual Medice that surveyed 25, 000 gay men Ameri about their last sexual enunters, only 36 percent said they had bottomed and 34 percent said they had, realy, we’re not actually fuckg all that much. Rearch has found more than 40% of gay men have an agreement that sex outsi of their relatnship is permissible pared to ls than 5% of heterosexual and lbian upl. While not everyone subscrib to those labels, for many queer people, and pecially gay men, llg yourself a top, bottom, or vers n be a way to help fd potential partners and hookups.

BORN TO BOTTOM? REARCHERS REPORT BLOGIL CORRELATNS ANAL SEX ROLE GAY MEN

The nonbary actor and mol posted an Instagram story back 2020 showg a "gay stg alignment chart" wh a red arrow potg towards the "top" posn and the words "this is how I was stg when I read this meme.

While anal sex is typilly practised by cis gay men (hey! Here, I’ve bed my own rearch and experience as a gay man to 10 easy steps – learn how to bottom wh ease.

Any self-rpectg gay man keeps wet wip or toilet wip around for this very reason. Pre-exposure prophylaxis (or PrEP) is also a dg that many gay men take for their sex liv.

GEICS MAY DETERME IF GAY MEN ARE TOPS OR BOTTOMS

While a sgle factor (the elive “gay gene, ” for example) has yet to emerge the ongog scientific vtigatn of what term sexualy, there are a host of theori. ”‘Surf Girls Hawai’i’ is the Real-Life ‘Blue Csh’ We’ve Waed 21 Years ForOffEnglishRegardls of how wi-rangg the studi are, they tend to have one thg mon: they treat gay men as a monolhic group. VanrLaan) has vtigated variatn wh the populatn of gay men based on their anal-sex rol (that is bottom, or receptive, top, or perative, and versatile, or both receptive and perative pendg on circumstance).

The rults of two of their studi suggt there very well uld be blogil subgroups of gay men, which is to say that one’s blogil makp uld possibly (and most likely, directly) fluence whether or not he lik to fuck or get fucked (or both) has been studied, anal-sex role has been viewed as a rult of social factors (more on that a mute). Dpe every study I’ve read that asks about the anal-sex role of s rponnts has found that the majory men who have sex wh men intify as versatile (cludg the two studi at hand om the Universy of Toronto team) as well as my own anecdotal experience suggtg as much, the top/bottom bary persists gay culture. And wh the assumptns of femy men e sults (“bottom” as a pejorative amongst gay men) and wh those e a specific kd of shame addn to the shame many gay men already experience merely livg a heterosexual perhaps if the variatn among gay men has blogil basis, uld help make one’s sir, not to mentn those of others, ls ght or timidatg, for one thg.

“What’s tertg about this work is even among a group of dividuals who are pretty siar terms of their sexual preference—that is, gay men preferrg men—there uld be a diverse set of procs that lead them to exhib that same sexual orientatn oute, ” explaed VanrLaan, an assistant profsor the Universy of Toronto Mississga’s Department of Psychology, and the senr thor on two recent papers: “Handns is a bmarker of variatn anal sex role behavr and Relled Childhood Genr Nonnformy among gay men, ” published on PLOS One, and “Genr Nonnformy and Birth Orr Relatn to Anal Sex Role Among Gay Men, ” published Archiv of Sexual studi built on prev rearch suggtg that gay men are more likely to be genr-nonnformg (“ls terted , say, male-typil [exhibg] ls mascule personaly characteristics, ” said VanrLaan), are more likely to be non-right hand than their straight unterparts, and are more likely to have olr brothers ( what’s known as the aternal birth orr effect, which technilly poss that the more olr brothers a man has om the same mother, the more likely he is to be gay).

GAY MEN'S PREFERENC FOR "TOP" VS. "BOTTOM" CAN BE JUDGED BY THEIR FACE

The Universy of Toronto team ntacted what would bee their sample of men durg the 2015 Toronto Pri ftivi and asked them to fill out onle surveys regardg their sexual posng (both preference and behavr—there was discernible variatn between the two), their relled childhood genr nonnformy (which was assigned a number through a regularly ed 23-em qutnnaire The Relled Childhood Genr Inty/Genr Role Qutnnaire, which asks qutns like “As a child my bt or clost iend was 1-always a boy, to 5-always a girl, ” and “In fantasy or pretend play, I took the role 1-only of boys or men, to 5-only of girls or women), their handns, and their amount of siblgs (the sampl of the two studi were almost intil, wh 91 straight men surveyed both studi, and 242 gay men the handns study vers the 243 men of the birth orr study).

”The team’s ultimate fdgs poted to statistilly signifint variatn amongst the gay men, wh bottoms beg more likely wh the sampled populatns to be genr-nonnformg (Table 1) and non-right hand (Table 2), as well as to have a higher proportn of olr brothers (Table 3):Note that the handns study found the strongt lks terms of behavr (i. As wh all self-reported studi, this one had s limatns (we n never ignore how sex-based shame may lor some gay men’s rpons regardg their sexual terts and practic, for example).