Lookg Through Childhood Diary Confirmed I Always Knew I Was Gay

i didnt know gay

The thor shar how readg through her notebook om when she was an early teen showed her what she always spected: she knew she was gay.

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READG MY DIARY OM WHEN I WAS A TEEN MA ME REALIZE I ALWAYS KNEW I WAS GAY

* i didnt know gay *

Readg my diary nfirmed that I knew way before then that I was gay. The clud stuffg my bra, buyg a thong, skny dippg, stealg, kissg a boy, havg cybersex, watchg porn, and wrg "bch" on a school the most movg tail was somethg I had no rellectn of — I always knew I was gay.

I am nfint that, had the Deidre who wrote the words been exposed to healthy reprentatns of queer love om an early age, she would have known that beg gay was OK. He says he's not bisexual or gay.

However, the amount that he jok about beg gay, givg blowjobs, etc., mak me thk he might be gay or bisexual and is g to terms wh his sexualy. I wouldn't have any problems wh this—I dated women for ten years prr to him—but he emphatilly swears he's straight and often pots out that he don't like gay porn, he don't like to see gay men beg affectnate, etc. But sure, GLORY, this may be a fetishistic sire on your boyiend's part or he uld be the tit b bisexual and this is how your boyiend exprs his ty b of bisexualy and only his unrolved homophobia/biphobia prevents him om nceivg of himself as bisexual.

HER BOYIEND ISN'T GAY OR BI BUT HE IS SUCKG DICKS GLORY HOL

Or he uld be secretly be a whole lotta gay but suckg dicks glory hol is all the gay he'll allow himself. Or he uld be one of those non-gay/non-bi guys who lov to suck the ocsnal dick. But the fact your boyiend don't like to see gay men beg affectnate smacks ls of, "Not gay or bi, not at all gay or bi, nothg to see here, " and more of, "Internalized homophobia and other issu and possibly bi or maybe even gay.

So while I want to acknowledge the existence, the lived experience, and the validy of straight boys who like to suck ck but who are no other way attracted to men, this tail—your boyiend's disfort around gay men—uld be a sign that somethg else is gog on wh him.

That don't have to mean he's gay or bi. It was a shty, selfish thg to do and you have a right to be angry about , GLORY, and you aren't obligated to put up wh this sh jt bee he's explorg his sexualy or stgglg wh ternalized homophobia/biphobia. It’s not until outsi factors like high school social prsure, relig tolerance and systemic homophobia e to play that the young people are led to believe those feelgs aren’t normal.

I ASKED GUYS WHEN THEY FIRST KNEW THEY WERE GAY

I talked to a few of my gay iends about their experienc realizg they were attracted to men, if anyone had explaed homosexualy to them growg up and whether or not at any time they were nvced that beg gay was “wrong.

11 HISTORIL FIGUR YOU DIDN’T KNOW WERE GAY

“I had no ia what beg gay was. I want to say around nth or tenth gra was when I started realizg I was gay. “There was never really a time that I thought beg gay was herently wrong.

MY HBAND IS GAY BUT WE’RE MARRIED WH TWO KIDS AND HAVE GREAT SEX

So yeah, I pretty much grew up thkg beg gay was wrong.

“I remember someone askg me fifth gra if I was gay and I said ‘y. I thk of beg gay, at least for me, as a spectm.

I would say I’m like 80% gay. “No one really explaed to me the ncept of homosexualy. I pretty much learned what meant to be gay through different social teractns wh kids at school or fay members who ma seem as if were bad or not ‘normal.

*BEAR-MAGAZINE.COM* I DIDNT KNOW GAY

Lookg Through Childhood Diary Confirmed I Always Knew I Was Gay .

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