A gay son’s rellectn of his dad’s advice on how to live his life | PBS News Weekend

growing up with gay dads

While growg up on a Washgton state dairy farm the 1950s, Patrick Haggerty realized he was gay. In this animated feature om our partners at StoryCorps, he tells his dghter, Rob, about the day his father showed up unexpectedly to his performance at a school assembly.

Contents:

GROWG UP WH A GAY FATHER – CONFSNS OM A STRAIGHT SON

Growg up wh a gay father created challeng for both my Dad & I. His journey out of the Bible Belt & closet was not easy. Most importantly though . . . * growing up with gay dads *

But I knew he was gay by the time I was 7 or 8. So this is my story of growg up wh a gay father. Growg up wh a gay father, particularly one who was aaid to e out, prented challeng our abily to get emotnally close.

I don’t rell a time when I didn’t know my Dad was gay. From my earlit memori of my Dad around age 5, I thk I always knew my dad was gay.

Th I never had that aha moment of realizg “I have a gay father”! To hear both of them tell , my Dad beg gay wasn’t a factor the spl. How my Dad me to terms wh beg gay.

10 THGS YOU’LL ONLY KNOW IF YOU’VE GROWN UP WH GAY PARENTS

I’m the proud owner of five dads. Before you ask, this breaks down as: my blogil father; my stepdad (his partner, y, my dad’s gay); my other stepdad (my mum's... * growing up with gay dads *

I don’t thk anyone knew yet that my Dad was gay. After all, he was the son of a Baptist Preacher and there would not have been much tolerance the 1940’s or 50’s for him to e out as gay.

In talkg to both of them over the years, they both claim they had no ia my Dad was gay. In retrospect, the fact that he was a cheerlear his bt iend was a male hairdrser (who was openly gay) that my Uncle Buddy nicknamed him “Percy” (which my Dad hated) and that my Dad went on to open a home furnishgs store might have been a clue. Realizg his sexualy and beg a gay father the late 1960s, pecially wh me a long way away, mt have been really transformative for my Dad.

He lived and around the Oak Lawn area of Dallas (long a predomantly gay or at least gay-iendly neighborhood). He was meetg lots of openly gay people & gog to clubs where was OK to be openly gay. Beg a gay father the 1960s.

GAY PARENTS RAISG KIDS: HOW WILL THEY FARE?

Gays Wh Kids is the ultimate onle rource for gay, bi and trans dads and dads-to-be. Bee a dad via surrogacy, adoptn, foster or -parentg. * growing up with gay dads *

My Dad never actually me out as gay to me or to most people. I’d known my Dad is gay for some time, but we’d never discsed . My Dad, of urse, was sistent that no one would obvly know he was gay (which also ma Tom and I lgh).

Are you a gay father stgglg to e out?

MY GAY DAD, MY QUEER FAY, HAPPILY EVER AFTER

The days, gay parents are no novelty. * growing up with gay dads *

In Loren’s se, he didn’t e to terms wh beg gay until the age of 40 and was married wh children at the time. How growg up wh a gay father affected me.

The one benef to always knowg I had a gay father is that there was never I time I rell thkg was wrong.

I first realized my Dad was gay when I was around 7 or 8, and I have no rellectn of him beg wh my Mom. Almost all his iends were gay as were most of his employe (those 2 groups pretty much beg the same people).

KIDS OF GAY PARENTS FARE WORSE, STUDY FDS, BUT REARCH DRAWS FIRE OM EXPERTS

Jot statement om advocy groups lls study a "flawed, misleadg, and scientifilly unsound paper that seeks to disparage lbian and gay parents;" thor fends his study * growing up with gay dads *

That beg said, I was probably spared a lot of bullyg at school sce no one there knew I had a gay father.

I feel que sure I got lucky this regard and that many kids wh a gay father were picked on for their parent’s sexualy.

A GAY SON’S RELLECTN OF HIS DAD’S ADVICE ON HOW TO LIVE HIS LIFE

* growing up with gay dads *

How knowg their grandfathers are gay affects my kids. I’m proud of the fact that I and their mother have raised our dghters to not qutn or judge my Dad or Tom beg gay. They don’t see him as my “gay father”; jt my father.

Our girls simply accept them for who they are, jt as they do all their other fay members who happen to not be gay.

WHAT 'S LIKE TO GROW UP WH A GAY FATHER

As we e to the end of June and Pri month, we wanted to take some time to highlight several children’s books featurg fai wh gay dads. We believe is important to read and expose our children to books that reflect the diversy ( all sens) of the world we live . It is… * growing up with gay dads *

I always knew he was gay and never had that “my Dad is gay” aha moment of realizg I had a gay father. Together we learned how to be a father and son a day and age where beg a gay father was most certaly owned upon.

If you are a gay father or the child of a gay father (or mother), and your relatnship isn’t all that uld be, don’t wa until ’s too late to fix .

[Gay Pri Para Rally Dallas] – This photograph is part of the llectn entled: LGBT Collectns and one other and was provid by UNT Librari Special Collectns to Digal Library.

BARBIE’S WEIRDO DOLLS: ALL ABOUT MIDGE, EARRG MAGIC KEN, AND MOREGRETA GERWIG’S MOVIE CLUS WKY MEOS OM SOME OF MATTEL’S MOST FAMO DISNTUED PRODUCTS—AND AT LEAST ONE THAT’S STILL AVAILABLE STOR.BY HILLARY BISJULY 21, 2023COURTY OF MATTEL INC.SAVE THIS STORYSAVESAVE THIS STORYSAVEALAS, YOU NNOT BUY A WEIRD BARBIE DOLL WHO LOOKS LIKE KATE MCKNON—YOU’LL JT HAVE TO CHOP OFF A REGULAR DOLL’S HAIR AND SCRIBBLE ON HER FACE YOURSELF. BUT YOU N BUY A VERSN OF THE POOPG BARBIE DOG THAT WEIRD BARBIE LIV WH GRETA GERWIG’S BARBIE. THE PLASTIC PET PACKAGED WH A BARBIE WEARG A STRIPED SWEATER AND SPORTY SNEAKERS; S OFFICIALLY SANCTNED NAME IS THE BARBIE WALK AND POTTY PUP. “WHEN ’S TIME FOR A POTTY BREAK, PH ON THE PUPPY’S TAIL,” THE AD PY READS. “BARBIE DOLL N CLEAN UP G THE BROOM AND SOPER.” CONGRATULATNS, KID. HERE’S A PILE OF CRAP!BARBIE IS A MERCHANDISER’S DREAM, A GENERALLY WELL-RECEIVED, ENARGLY SUBVERSIVE PRODUCT THAT’S STILL, AT HEART, A GLORIFIED TWO-HOUR TOY MERCIAL. BUT TO THE FILM’S CRED, DON’T SHY AWAY OM REFERENCG SOME OF MATTEL’S ODR OFFERGS. ACRDG TO A NEW YORKER ARTICLE, THE FETG DOG IS ACTUALLY BASED ON TANNER, A BARBIE ACCSORY OM THE GHTS THAT ATE S OWN POOP—Y!—AND WAS EVENTUALLY RELLED NOT FOR BEG DISGTG, BUT BEE THE MAG SI BARBIE’S POOPER SOPER ULD E LOOSE AND BE SWALLOWED BY A CHILD. (THE WALK AND POTTY PUP APPEARS TO BE SENTIALLY THE SAME TOY, M MAGS.) BELOW, WE TAKE STOCK OF MORE TOYS LIKE TANNER: THE REAL-LIFE WEIRD BARBI THAT DREW PLATS, RISN, AND CELEBRATN AS ACCINTAL GAY INS. PROT BARBIE IS NOT AMONG THEM—AT LEAST, NOT YET.COURTY OF MATTEL, INC.MIDGEEMERALD FENNELL HAS A GLORIFIED MEO BARBIE AS MIDGE, A REDHEAD DOLL WH A BUN THE OVEN. Y, THAT’S RIGHT: MIDGE IS PREGNANT. THAT DIFFERENTIAT THE MOVIE’S VERSN OF THE DOLL OM HER ORIGAL RNATN, LNCHED 1963 AS BARBIE’S MORE APPROACHABLE BT PAL. SHE WAS DISNTUED 1967, THEN RETRODUCED 1987, AGA THE ’90S, AND, MOST FAMOLY, ONE MORE TIME THE GHTS, AS PART OF THE “HAPPY FAY” SET—WHICH GAVE MIDGE A TY DOLL BABY THAT ULD BE PLACED EHER A BULGG STOMACH (WHICH GIRLS ULD MAGILLY ATTACH AND TACH OM MIDGE’S MIDDLE) OR “BORN” OUT OF THAT SAME PLASTIC DOME. HER HBAND AND THREE-YEAR-OLD SON WERE SOLD SEPARATELY.GGER GAETZ, WIFE OF MATT, ANNOUNCED TUDAY THAT SHE HAD SEEN THE BARBIE MOVIE, AND WAS DISAPPOTED BY PART DUE TO THE FILM’S “UNFAIR TREATMENT OF PREGNANT BARBIE MIDGE.” IRONIC, SCE NSERVATIVE IRE WAS STMENTAL GETTG HAPPY FAY MIDGE NCELED. “IT’S A BAD IA. IT PROMOT TEENAGE PREGNANCY. WHAT WOULD AN 8-YEAR-OLD OR 12-YEAR-OLD GET OUT OF THAT DOLL BABY?” ONE MOTHER ASKED THE ASSOCIATED PRS 2002. THE DOLL WAS PULLED OM WAL-MART DUE TO PLATS; JT AS NARRATOR HELEN MIRREN TELLS BARBIE, SHE WAS EVENTUALLY AXED OM THE MATTEL LP ALTOGETHER FOR BEG “TOO WEIRD.” BUT PERHAPS MIDGE GETS THE LAST LGH: ACRDG TO AT LEAST ONE LLECTOR, SHE’S NOW WORTH UP TO $400 MT NDN.COURTY OF MATTEL, INC.ALLANREMEMBER HOW MIDGE HAD A HBAND? THAT WOULD BE ALLAN, PLAYED THE MOVIE BY A VERY GAME MICHAEL CERA. ORIGALLY TRODUCED 1964, HE WAS CREATED TO BE KEN’S BT BUDDY. (BARBIE WAS NAMED FOR CREATOR RUTH HANDLER’S DGHTER, AND KEN FOR HER SON; ALLAN WAS NAMED FOR HER THEN-SON--LAW, ALLEN SEGAL.) KEN AND ALLAN ARE VERY CLOSE; AS CERA TELLS THE MOVIE, “ALL HIS CLOTH F ME” (A LE STRAIGHT OUT OF THE MERCIALS). LIKE MIDGE, ALLAN’S BEEN AND OUT OF THE BARBIE UNIVERSE FOR NEARLY 60 YEARS—MOSTLY OUT. MATTEL HASN’T YET RELEASED AN ALLAN BARBIE TIE- DOLL, BUT GIVEN HOW FUNNY CERA IS THE FILM, THEY REALLY SHOULD.MOST POPULAROUR FLAG MEANS DEATH SEASON 2: EXCLIVE FIRST LOOKBY SARAH CATHERALLFLORENCE PUGH SAYS CHRISTOPHER NOLAN “APOLOGIZED” FOR HER SMALL OPPENHEIMER ROLEBY SAVANNAH WALSHTHE GILD AGE WILL GET A LOT MORE OPERATIC SEASON 2BY RICHARD LAWSONCOURTY OF MATTEL, INC.VIO GIRL BARBIEDEEP WH WEIRD BARBIE’S GONZO DREAMHOE LURKS VIO GIRL BARBIE (METTE NARRATIVE), WHO LOOKS LIKE AN ODDY OM THE 90S BUT WAS ACTUALLY TRODUCED JT 13 YEARS AGO. AS THE WALL STREET JOURNAL WROTE AT THE TIME, VIO GIRL “HAS A GAPG HOLE HER CHT, DISGUISED AS A FASHN PENDANT, THAT NTAS A MERA LENS.” IT’S NNECTED TO THE VIO SCREEN EMBEDD TO HER BACK. THE IA WAS THAT GIRLS ULD E THE DOLLS TO RERD AND PLAY THEIR OWN HOME MOVI. (THIS WAS 2010, REMEMBER, YEARS BEFORE WAS POSSIBLE TO SHOOT A WELL-RECEIVED DIE MOVIE ENTIRELY ON AN IPHONE.) WH THE PACY TO PTURE ABOUT 25 MUT OF FOOTAGE, USB PATIBILY, AND EE EDG SOFTWARE, YOU N IMAGE THE DOLL BEG A H WH FUTURE GRETA GERWIGS. INSTEAD, VIO GIRL WAS CENSURED BY—AND THIS IS TE—THE FBI, WHICH ISSUED AN ADVISORY SAYG THAT THE DOLL ULD POTENTIALLY BE ED TO RERD CHILD PORNOGRAPHY. PERHAPS NEEDLS TO SAY, MATTEL NO LONGER SELLS VIO GIRL BARBIE.COURTY OF MATTEL, INC.GROWG UP SKIPPERANOTHER ONE OM THE BAD IA FIL, THIS DOLL—ALSO BANISHED TO WEIRD BARBIE’S HOE OF NIGHTMAR THE FILM, WHERE SHE’S PLAYED BY HANNAH KHALIQUE-BROWN—IS THE VERSN OF BARBIE’S LTLE SISTER RELEASED 1975 THAT “GROWS AS HER FIGURE MATUR.” MEANG WHEN YOU TURN HER ARM, SHE GETS TALLER…AND HER BOOBS SWELL. NOPE!MOST POPULAROUR FLAG MEANS DEATH SEASON 2: EXCLIVE FIRST LOOKBY SARAH CATHERALLFLORENCE PUGH SAYS CHRISTOPHER NOLAN “APOLOGIZED” FOR HER SMALL OPPENHEIMER ROLEBY SAVANNAH WALSHTHE GILD AGE WILL GET A LOT MORE OPERATIC SEASON 2BY RICHARD LAWSONCOURTY OF MATTEL, INC.TEEN TALK BARBIERELEASED 1992 (AND PLAYED ONSCREEN BY MARISA ABELA), TEEN TALK BARBIE HAD A VOICE BOX THAT SHE ED TO SAY THGS LIKE “LET’S PLAN OUR DREAM WEDDG!” AND “MATH CLASS IS TOUGH!” FEMISTS RAILED AT THE DOLL, SPIRG A CLASSIC EPISO OF THE SIMPSONS THAT READS SORT OF LIKE A FIRST DRAFT FOR GERWIG’S BARBIE MOVIE.COURTY OF MATTEL, INC.EARRG MAGIC KENWHEN BARBIE (MARGOT ROBBIE) AND KEN (RYAN GOSLG) ROLLERBLA TO VENICE BEACH, KEN MOMENTARILY FDS HIMSELF RECEIVG APPRECIATIVE GLANC OM TWO QUEER-D BYSTANRS. THOSE GUYS MAY HAVE BEEN EVEN MORE EXCED TO MEET ANOTHER WEIRD BARBIE PAL: EARRG MAGIC KEN (TOM STOURTON THE MOVIE), RELEASED 1993. HE WAS CLAD PURPLE LEATHER AND MH; HE HAD, OF URSE, A SGLE GLEAMG HOOP EARRG. MOST POPULAROUR FLAG MEANS DEATH SEASON 2: EXCLIVE FIRST LOOKBY SARAH CATHERALLFLORENCE PUGH SAYS CHRISTOPHER NOLAN “APOLOGIZED” FOR HER SMALL OPPENHEIMER ROLEBY SAVANNAH WALSHTHE GILD AGE WILL GET A LOT MORE OPERATIC SEASON 2BY RICHARD LAWSONHE WAS PART OF THE PANY’S NEW EARRG MAGIC LE, BUT IMMEDIATELY STOOD APART AFTER BEG UNOFFICIALLY ADOPTED BY THE GAY MUNY—NOT LEAST BEE OF THE STUNNG SILVER PENDANT HE WORE AROUND HIS NECK. (FANS LIKE SEX ADVICE LUMNIST DAN SAVAGE TERPRETED THE JEWELRY UH, DIFFERENTLY THAN MATTEL DID. “IT’S A NECKLACE. IT HOLDS CHARMS HE N SHARE WH BARBIE,” A SPOKWOMAN TOLD HIM AT THE TIME. “C’MON, THIS IS A DOLL SIGNED FOR LTLE GIRLS.”) HE WAS MEANT TO MAKE GIRLS THK KEN WAS OL. INSTEAD, HE GOT A BUNCH OF OL MEN TO THK KEN WAS OL, WHICH IS HONTLY A MORE IMPRSIVE ACHIEVEMENT.COURTY OF MATTEL, INC.SUGAR’S DADDY (OR IS IT SUGAR DADDY?) KENBY 2009—11 YEARS AFTER WILL & GRACE BUTED!—ONE MIGHT EXPECT MATTEL TO HAVE GROWN WISER TO THE WAYS S PRODUCTS WOULD BE TERPRETED BY ADULTS. THAT WAS THE YEAR THE PANY RELEASED SUGAR’S DADDY KEN (NOTE THE POSSSIVE NOUN!), PART OF S PALM BEACH LE OF TOYS AIMED AT GROWN-UP LLECTORS. SUGAR’S DADDY (PLAYED BY ROB BRYDON THE FILM) ME WH A WELL-TAILORED PAISLEY BLAZER, A SMART PAIR OF WHE LOAFERS, AND A TEENY WHE TERRIER ON A PK LEASH. THAT WOULD BE SUGAR. “THE LTLE DOG’S NAME IS ACTUALLY SUGAR,” A MATTEL SPOKWOMAN TOLD THE NEW YORK POST AT THE TIME. “THAT’S WHERE THE NAME OM. HE’S SUGAR’S DADDY, AS A REFERENCE TO THE DOG.” UH HUH. SPEAKG TO ABC NEWS, THE PANY SEEMED SLIGHTLY MORE SELF-AWARE. “AT THE END OF THE DAY, THIS LLECTN IS TARGETED TOWARD ADULTS,” A SPOKWOMAN TOLD THE OUTLET. “WHILE THE NAME OF THE DOLL DO REFER BACK TO THE DOG, I THK PEOPLE ARE GOG TO TERPRET AS THEY WANT TO TERPRET .” SO THIS SE, AT LEAST, THE JOKE MAY HAVE BEEN ON THE RT OF .MORE GREAT STORI FROM VANY FAIRRILEY KEOUGH ON GROWG UP PRLEY, INHERG GRACELAND, AND MORETE CRIME, TE FAH: THE SERIAL KILLER AND THE TEXAS MOM WHO STOPPED HIMTHE TAN SUBMERSIBLE DISASTER WAS YEARS THE MAKG, NEW DETAILS REVEALWHY THE GEIA INDICTMENT AGAST TMP AND HIS ALLI IS THE MOST SWEEPG YETIVANKA TMP IS NOT LETTG HER DAD’S MOUNTG LEGAL WO RU HER SUMMER25 PERFECT TV EPISOS FROM THE LAST 25 YEARSA NEW SLIM AARONS BOOK CAPTUR A LOST WORLDFROM THE ARCHIVE: TOO HEPBURN FOR HOLLYWOOD (2006)HILLARY BIS

Before you ask, this breaks down as: my blogil father; my stepdad (his partner, y, my dad’s gay); my other stepdad (my mum’s partner); my father--law and my hband (the father of my two children).

But what you and everyone else wants to know is what is really like growg up wh gay parents? Here are 10 thgs that everyone wh gay parents n relate to.

I GREW UP WH A GAY DAD AND I COULDN’T BE PROUR

While I was open about my parents spltg up, I knew the real reason behd the break-up uldn’t be talked about; the part where my dad me out as gay. Has he always known he’s gay? He don’t look gay, do he?

'THERE WERE NO MOLS': GROWG UP THE 70S WH AN OUT GAY DAD

I thk their parents were sred they’d tch the ‘gay bug’ off my dads or me (I might rry too!

*BEAR-MAGAZINE.COM* GROWING UP WITH GAY DADS

Growg Up Wh a Gay Father - Confsns om a Straight Son .

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