3 Ways to Accept That You Are Gay - wikiHow

Contents:

• FEELG GUILTY ABOUT "GAY THOUGHTS"
• HOW DO I KNOW I’M NOT REALLY GAY/STRAIGHT?
• INTSIVE THOUGHTS ABOUT BEG GAY
• YOU ARE NOT GAY, 'S HOCD, FOR ALL YOU SUFFERERS.
• MEET THE STRAIGHT MEN WHO ARE TERRIFIED THEY ARE GAY
• HOW TO KNOW IF YOU ARE GAY
• AM I GAY?
• HOCD; AM I GAY OR STRAIGHT?
• 'HOMOSEXUAL OCD': STRAIGHT MEN WHO SPECT THEY ARE GAY
• AM I GAY IF I HAVE SAME SEX FANTASI?
• YOU’RE NOT GAY: HOMOSEXUALY ANXIETY OCD
• HOW DO I KNOW IF I AM GAY? SIGNS YOU ARE GAY
• HOW TO ACCEPT THAT YOU ARE GAY
• HOCD – GAY OR HOMOSEXUAL OCD AND REVERY

FEELG GUILTY ABOUT "GAY THOUGHTS"

” Some people’s doubts are further plited by havg such experienc as hearg other people talkg or lookg their directn and thkg that the people mt be analyzg their behavr or appearance and talkg about them – discsg how they mt be gay (or straight). I have sometim wonred if those who experience the most distrs om such thoughts as the do so bee they were raised wh more strongly homophobic or anti-gay attus to beg wh, or if is simply bee one’s sexualy n be such a basic doubt.

The flip si of this is when they look at thgs havg to do wh sex of an oppose orientatn and then feel aroed some way, which they then nclu to mean that they liked , which means that they are gay (or straight). Makg a seri of three-mute tap that based on the wrgs gradually suggt more and more that you are gay, and listeng to them several tim a day changg them when they no longer bother you). Not buyg aga( y i also got ocd sometim when buyg thgs)After that was hard, my thoughts had basilly epic battl between the gay crap my head which i know a't real and the real thgs that i know i'm straight.

I don't really re about how people would treat me even as a straight person if you don't like me there's the door, but even if i really was gay i wouldn't give 2 shs about what people thk aswell.

HOW DO I KNOW I’M NOT REALLY GAY/STRAIGHT?

Another thg is that when your thoughts sayg your gay and you try to fight off bee ofurse you don't feel right wh , and you say NO IM HETERO, and also keep checkg and repeatg thought about the straight thgs you did the past etc, that's somethg you shouldn't do anymore, nfirmg that you're straight. Simply by the fact that you would have felt emotnally and physilly attracted to men and fd perfectly normal and loved havg gay thoughts, imag and that you have read the above, uld be like me that you still have unwanted thoughts. He rried out the same tt almost every night for the next three weeks, always wh the same searchg Inter mental health foms for answers to his private impasse, Darren beme nvced that he was sufferg om 'HOCD': a not officially regnised form of Obssive Compulsive Disorr fed by the fear of beg or beg homosexual.

INTSIVE THOUGHTS ABOUT BEG GAY

While he asserts that 'HOCD', an acronym ed by sufferers sharg their stori onle, isn't officially classified the Diagnostic and Statistil Manual of Mental Disorrs (DSM), he says that the irratnal fear of beg or beg gay falls firmly wh the umbrella of Obssive Compulsive Disorr. Darren says he grew up a "liberal-ish" hoehold and believ that homosexualy would have been accepted by his fay and iends, but 's easy to see how a ls tolerant upbrgg uld turn homosexualy to a e for anxiety.

YOU ARE NOT GAY, 'S HOCD, FOR ALL YOU SUFFERERS.

Nowadays, the majory of tablished OCD chari – cludg OCDUK, OCDActn and Md - addrs tsive sexual thoughts as a mon trope of the disorr, but that has done ltle to stem a backlash om some high-profile skeptics wh the psychologil muny, who believe that HOCD is at bt misguid, and at worst homophobia s most pernic guise.

"My psychologist jt looked bored and hand me a leaflet"In November 2015, BuzzFeed UK's LGBT edor Patrick Stdwick published an article tled '"World's Leadg Anxiety Expert" Offers Treatment For People Who Worry That They're Gay' that heavily cricised the practice of a Harley Street therapist named Charl Ln who, acrdg to the se, boasted of a "100% succs rate" the treatment of "HOCD" the time the article was wrten, Ln's publishers were dubbg him as "the world's leadg thory on anxiety", and his webse ma hefty promis to sexually-nfed OCD sufferers. "If you are experiencg HOCD … and the thoughts , " the se read, "you are not gay and when you do my Method to elimate this and your other anxieti you'll fd out why you thk you might be and why you certaly are NOT!

MEET THE STRAIGHT MEN WHO ARE TERRIFIED THEY ARE GAY

Elizabeth Peel, chair of the Brish Psychologil Society's 'Psychology of Sexuali' sectn and a profsor of Communitn & Social Interactn at Loughborough Universy, stat wh the piece that: "The term 'Homosexual OCD' is simply nversn therapy unr another guise and somethg we strongly nmn as damagg. And an age where even the Vice Print of the Uned Stat has exprsed tac support for the practice, 's unrstandable that high profile figur the psychologil muny would nmn anythg that uld fuel the rhetoric of homophobic 'therapists', or provi party-le approval of their methods. After all, spe recent headways by LGBT groups and nunciatn om former Print Barrack Obama, gay nversn therapy is still legal across the US and only six stat have banned the practice relatn to mors.

"If a client who is gay but anx about the nsequenc of acceptg themselv or g out go to a therapist who has an agenda about homosexualy, then of urse that therapist isn't workg the bt tert of their clients.

HOW TO KNOW IF YOU ARE GAY

"Rose Bretécher believ the accatn HOCD is jt 'ternalised homophobia' is rrect, but don't blame anyone for leapg to such a ncln: "People's unrstandg is only as good as the rmatn available out there – and awarens is still pretty poor. "Joseph tells me that he has never had a gay person e to him wh tsive thoughts about heterosexualy, but ttimony exists on Inter foms, and the OCD Center of Los Angel stat that do happen.

"Over the years, therapists here […] have treated many homosexuals (male and female) who are plagued by obssive fears of beg "straight", and who suffer equally when OCD attacks their sexual inty, " stat their webse, which also offers an onle HOCD tt.

"If someone is fearful of beg gay bee beg gay reprents to them abandonment by their fay, or rejectn, or experiencg vlence or abe, then you would help them to accept themselv unndnally as a gay man. Gay - While this adjective has historilly scribed men who are attracted to other men, the term now is ed to refer to anyone who experienc romantic, emotnal, or physil attractn to people of the same genr. The obssns n take the form of doubt, for example, a heterosexual male fearg they are gay, or vice versa, a gay man fearg that he is you have thoughts that make you doubt your long-standg sexual preferenc, and the thoughts go agast your te sexual inty, and you have no genue sire to start a same-sex relatnship, You uld have a form of Obssive-pulsive disorr lled Homosexual potsYou nnot be diagnosed wh HOCD as is not rerd as a distct disorr DMS-5.

AM I GAY?

It is a label ed to scribe a particular set of obssns and pulsns relatg to sexual has nothg to do wh prejudice or homophobia—the obssns related to a fear that long-standg sexual inty has name is misleadg; homosexual OCD. The obssn n be the thought what if I am gay and then feelg pelled (the pulsn) to check this out by lookg at members of the same sex to tt if there is an attractn example, a straight person wh HOCD may fear beg secretly gay, while a gay person wh HOCD may fear beg you are a heterosexual male but sudnly start to qutn that maybe you are gay or a heterosexual female and beg to doubt your long-standg attractn to men, this article will help you make sense of what is gog on. Homosexual Obssive Compulsive Disorr (HOCD) is a type of OCD where the person experienc obssive thoughts and doubts about their prevly taken-for-granted sexual n often clu excsive checkg for signs of homosexualy, qutng recent teractns wh others and playg out potential the ndn first entered the public doma, was labelled HOCD and, acrdg to Bhatia & Kr, 2015 (1), was marked by excsive fear of beg or beg homosexual.

People wh HOCD often thk they are gay or bisexual bee of obssive thoughts and self-doubt, not bee they feel attracted to people of the same shared thoughts and behavurs associated wh HOCD are difficulty settg asi thoughts about your sexual orientatn, avoidance of people of the same sex, preoccupatn wh one’s level of aroal toward eher sex and avoidg people who might make you qutn your thoughts n be credibly distrsg and lead to a great al of anxiety and nfn.

HOCD; AM I GAY OR STRAIGHT?

Doubt And The Denial QutnHomosexual OCD And Sexual AroalTreatments for HOCDSelf-help urse for HOCDSigns of HOCDWarng signs may clu:creased attractn to people of the oppose sex, creased attractn to those of your own sex, preoccupatn wh the level of aroal you feel towards people of eher genr, nstg any posive reactn as evince that one is gay or straight, and watchg both gay and straight n be challengg to diagnose, so you mt know the warng signs if you thk you might have do I know if I have HOCD? ” Dog this n distance you om the thoughts, see them as HOCD symptoms, and not prove that you are gay or do the pulsns to make yourself feel better or try to ‘check out if you are gay’ COMPULSIONSYou are gog over prev sexual enunters wh members of the oppose sex to reassure yourself that you are not might try to image beg wh a member of the same sex to check out your theory that you might be might have remembered an event om your childhood that you now see as evince that you are gay.

'HOMOSEXUAL OCD': STRAIGHT MEN WHO SPECT THEY ARE GAY

Watchg same-sex porn to see if you get aroedWatchg straight porn to see if you get aroedGog to gay bars to see if you are attracted to anyoneExcsive Checkg: This volv repeatedly checkg one’s body for any signs related to homosexualy.

AvoidancePeople who have HOCD may avoid what they believe may trigger their uld be certa songs or artists that you associate wh beg gay, typ of TV programs, magaz or books that you might associate more wh same-sex might avoid gog out or mixg wh a same-sex uple or showg support for same-sex upl. Avoidg men if your HOCD is ncerned wh beg gayAvoidg women if your HOCD is related to the feelg that you are lbianAvoidg takg part thgs that you believe are too manly or too femaleAvoidg changg rooms where you will see members of your sex drs and undrsNot beg able to make eye ntact wh members of the same sex or avoid hangg out wh themAny topics of nversatn relatg to sexual preferenceMovi where same-sex actors may kiss or be romantilly volvedFdg Members Of The Same-Sex AttractiveHuman begs fd many thgs attractive. I shall ntradict myself now; thoughts only have the meang you give to them, so be reful about any flty beliefs you may In The SpotlightYou might have noticed that your life before HOCD, you never qutned your sexual preference, took heterosexual relatnships for granted, and never noticed who was gay and who was you have a radar, or a spotlight as I like to thk of , where everythg you do, and everywhere you go, you seem to notice thgs that make you qutn your sexual preference.

AM I GAY IF I HAVE SAME SEX FANTASI?

If you were meetg iends for a ffee, you would have filtered out the people you walked past, how you were walkg and foced on gettg to the ffee shop and filtered out the background noise to enjoy your iend’s you have a spotlight; you n selectively attend to everythg you associate wh beg gay. It uld be challengg to pay attentn and jt enjoy beg wh your iends, as you might wonr if they thk you are of this do not mean that you are gay; means that you are shg a spotlight on thgs that you associate wh beg gay, which brgs me to an important pot; what’s the difference between HOCD and beg gay?

Difference Between HOCD And Beg GayIt’s straightforward, HOCD is Obssive-Compulsive Disorr, and beg gay is enjoyg and wantg romantic relatnships wh members of the same you have HOCD, your thoughts are ncerned about beg gay–not your actns. Further ReadgCentreforanxietydisorrsNCBITreatments for HOCDIf you are stgglg wh HOCD, there are thgs you n do on your own that, ’s sential to unrstand that HOCD nnot change your sexual orientatn- is only a doubt, a symptom of the ndn to know if you are gay or, try not to give the thoughts too much power by refg to engage wh them.

YOU’RE NOT GAY: HOMOSEXUALY ANXIETY OCD

24, 2014— -- Steven Brodsky, a psychologist who specializ obssive-pulsive disorr, says that at any one time he has a "handful" of clients who are straight and spect that they are gay. Brodsky said a prev therapist had misdiagnosed his patient as gay, and at the patient's requt, sent him off to reparative therapy, a ntroversial method that has not been proven to be effective and n be harmful.

Jack Drcher, a noted New York Cy psychiatrist who is nsired an expert gay and lbian mental health and treats patients for OCD, agreed that "beg worried that one might be gay is not the same thg as beg gay. ""A person wh OCD who has is havg tsive thoughts about whether or not he is gay, is not gay, the sense that he has not rporated a homosexual orientatn any mimally affirmg way to his inty, " said Drcher.

"Also, if he is not actually attracted to people of the same sex, do not masturbate to fantasi of people of the same sex, is not really aroed by same sex pornography, then is hard to make the se that he has a homosexual orientatn. Another was heterosexual and feared he had agreed wh Brodsky that some therapists may miss an OCD diagnosis, but "the most likely e of that is not that they are too gay-affirmg but that they lack trag regnizg the symptoms of OCD.

HOW DO I KNOW IF I AM GAY? SIGNS YOU ARE GAY

Disregardg all evince that the ex-gay movement is credibly damagg to more than 90% of those who unrgo "treatment" (bee they clearly jt didn't believe God enough), Settg Captiv Free wants you to know that you were not "born this way. " Homosexualy is a s that you need to purge om your system, and the only way to do is to follow their three-parts-a-day the app is only downloadable om Google Play (iTun and the 69, 822+ people who petned them don't believe nversn therapy for some reason), there is an abridged versn available on the mistry’s webse. Change For the Right Reasons (the Glory Of God): After all, homosexualy is nothg but "lt, porn, and sexual immoraly, " ss that are applible only to gay people and never to straight on.

HOW TO ACCEPT THAT YOU ARE GAY

Realize That Beg Homosexual Mak You Feel Alone Fet that we told you to shut yourself away om most of the world, and ignore the ia that maybe gay people feel so alone bee of the discrimatory and hateful attus that they face, helped by people like . Scientists are not yet sure exactly what someone to be lbian, gay, bisexual, or straight, but recent rearch shows that there are blogil factors place before birth that fluence people’s sexual orientatn. As of this wrg I have been bombard by threads, private msag, e-mail, and stant msag by straight folks terrified that they are gay (and a very small number of gay and bisexual folks terrified that they, too, are not their real sexual orientatn).

HOCD – GAY OR HOMOSEXUAL OCD AND REVERY

Neverthels, is sufficiently wispread to warrant more specialists the field, more media exposure, and more unrstandg among therapists relativ, iends, and, pecially, gay people who give the wrong advice. Currently sufferg om OCD (Obssive Compulsive Disorr)Recurrg unwanted or tsive thoughts about your own sexualyConstantly reassurg yourself that you are straightAvoidg people of your same genr due to anxiety or unwanted fears that you might be gayWorryg that you might be sendg out “signals” that will make others thk you are gayHomosexual thoughts are repulsive to you, rather than arogFeelg no attractn to your same sexRepeatg an actn bee you worry that you might have done somethg a way that mak others thk you are gay (example: a man repeatedly gets up and ss down on a chair bee he worri that he tak a seat a way that looks too feme). Homosexual thoughts are enjoyable and/or arog to the person, even if they hi their sexual orientatn om others or are ashamed of Havg had past sexual experienc wh those of their same genrPreferrg to date or have sexual enunters wh people of their same genr stead of wh those of the oppose sexOften, people who are gay report havg felt differently than their same-sex peers at an early age.

A person sufferg om this sub-type of OCD nstantly doubts their sexual orientatn:A straight person worri whether they might actually be gay even though they haven’t doubted their sexual orientatn the pastThey might worry that homosexualy is “tchg”They may thk that talkg wh a gay person will make them act out by triggerg their own latent homosexual tennci. Where a tly gay person obtas happs and relief the act of revealg their homosexual orientatn, HOCD people who e out ntue to doubt their wh tradnal OCD, people who are affected by this ternalized homophobia engage ruals to help them alleviate their anxiety and prove to themselv that they are tly straight.