From foster to 'forever' parents: One gay uple's path to adoptn | SBS News

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• FROM FOSTER TO 'FOREVER' PARENTS: ONE GAY UPLE'S PATH TO ADOPTNDPE SAME-SEX ADOPTN BEG LEGAL ACROSS THE ENTIRE UNTRY - AND WA LEADG THE WAY 16 YEARS AGO - 'S FAR OM AN EASY ROAD TO CREATG A FAY.THE UPCROFTS ON A FAY HOLIDAY. SOURCE: SUPPLIEDTHIS MONTH THE NORTHERN TERRORY BEME THE LAST OF ATRALIA'S STAT AND TERRORI TO LET GAY UPL ADOPT. THE TERRORY PARLIAMENT AGREED TO CHANGE AN ADOPTN LAW THAT HAD PREVLY LIMED THE RIGHT TO ADOPT CHILDREN TO MARRIED HETEROSEXUAL UPL, OR THOSE TRADNAL ABORIGAL MARRIAG.IN ALAI, FLRS UNIVERSY ASSOCIATE PROFSOR DAMIEN RIGGS HAS REARCHED FOSTER RE AND ADOPTN ATRALIA AND SAYS THERE ARE STILL SOME BARRIERS TO SAME-SEX ADOPTN.HE SAYS FOSTER-RE AGENCI N STILL REJECT APPLITNS OM LGBTIQ PEOPLE ON RELIG GROUNDS, RCG THE RAT OF ADOPTN BY SAME-SEX UPL. "THERE STILL IS A POSSIBILY THAT SOME AGENCI WOULD SAY, 'NO, WE WON'T ASSS THAT ONE,' SO THAT HAS KNOCK-ON EFFECTS FOR ADOPTN, IF 'S ADOPTN OM RE," DR RIGGS SAYS. "IF YOU N'T BEE A RER THE FIRST PLACE, THEN THAT'S GOG TO LIM YOUR ADOPTN OPTNS." DR RIGGS SAYS, WHILE THE LEGAL BARRIERS TO ADOPTN FOR SAME-SEX UPL ARE GONE, GAS REPRODUCTIVE MEDICE MEAN MANY LGBTIQ PEOPLE MAY TAKE THE SCIENTIFIC ROUTE TO CREATG A FAY."IT'S TERTG WHICH ONE HAS BEEN TAKEN UP MORE, AND I WOULD SAY THAT FOSTER RE AND ADOPTN HAS BEEN TAKEN UP LS MONLY BY LBIAN AND GAY UPL THAN HAS IVF OR SURROGACY."MAKG THE UPCROFTS AN OFFICIAL FAYEARLY ON THEIR RELATNSHIP PL AND BRENDAN UPCROFT CID THEY WANTED TO HAVE CHILDREN, A DREAM THEY HAVE ACHIEVED, FIRSTLY THROUGH FOSTERG AND, FALLY THROUGH ADOPTN. FOR THE UPLE, ADOPTG THEIR TWO FOSTER CHILDREN - SIBLGS AIDAN AND KALEB - BROUGHT A EP SENSE OF RELIEF.THE UPCROFTS ON THE DAY THE ADOPTN WAS OFFICIALLY FALISED. SOURCE: SUPPLIEDTHE TWO BOYS, AGED 13 AND 11, HAD BEEN THEIR RE SCE 2014, BUT ADOPTN WAS THE FAL STEP THE FORMATN OF THE FAY OM THE NEW SOUTH WAL REGNAL CY OF MALAND.PL UPCROFT SAYS THAT WHEN HE HAD ASKED HIS YOUNGT SON HOW HE FELT ABOUT THE ADOPTN, HE RPOND WH RERVED ENTHIASM. "KALEB, WE MENTNED TO HIM THAT FRIDAY'S THE DAY WE'RE GOG TO THE URT TO SEE THE JUDGE," MR UPCROFT RELLS.BROTHERS KALEB AND AIDAN WERE FOSTER RE FOR NE YEARS BEFORE THEY WERE ADOPTED BY BRENDAN AND PL UPCROFT. SOURCE: SUPPLIED"IT JT SORT OF WENT OVER HIM. AND I ASKED HIM THE NEXT DAY, AND HE SAID, 'OH, 'S ALL ON THE SI, 'S ALL ON THE SI.' SO, THEY LOVE BEG PART OF THE UPCROFT FAY." ATRALIAN INSTUTE OF HEALTH AND WELFARE STATISTICS SHOW MORE THAN 46,000 ATRALIAN CHILDREN NOW LIVE OUT-OF-HOME RE, WH MORE THAN 40 PER CENT RE FOR AT LEAST FIVE YEARS. KALEB AND AIDAN HAVE SPENT MUCH OF THEIR SHORT LIV FOSTER RE, TOO, BUT, WHEN BOTH AGREED TO BE ADOPTED BY THE UPCROFTS, THE CHANGE WAS MA. BRENDAN UPCROFT SAYS, FOR HIS PARTNER AND HIM, WAS ABOUT GIVG THE BOYS A SENSE OF SECURY. "THE OTHER DRIVER BEHD MOVG TO ADOPTN WAS THE STABILY THAT PROVIS OUR SONS. AIDAN AND KALEB HAVE NOW BEEN FOSTER RE FOR ALMOST NE YEARS. AND WHILST 'S BEEN A VERY STABLE THREE-AND-A-HALF YEARS LIVG WH , ALWAYS HANGG OVER THEIR HEADS IS THE FACT THAT THGS ULD CHANGE, THE AGENCY ULD SUDNLY E AND SAY TO THEM, 'RIGHT, WE NEED TO MOVE YOU TO A DIFFERENT PLACEMENT.'"NOW, THEY HAVE STABILY, AND THEY'LL BE WH THEIR PARENTS NOW FOREVER."BLOGIL PARENTS N STILL PLAY A ROLE CHILDREN'S LIVDPE THE CREASGLY LONG-TERM NATURE OF OUT-OF-HOME RE, FEW LONG-TERM PLACEMENTS LEAD TO ADOPTN.LAST YEAR, JT 315 ADOPTNS WERE FALISED ATRALIA, CLUDG TERNATNAL ADOPTNS, WH ABOUT 45 PER CENT BY KNOWN RERS SUCH AS FOSTER PARENTS OR RELATIV.AMONG LOL ADOPTNS, ABOUT 88 PER CENT ALLOW SOME GREE OF NTACT OR THE EXCHANGE OF RMATN BETWEEN BLOGIL AND ADOPTIVE FAI.BRENDAN UPCROFT SAY ADOPTN HAS GIVEN THE BOYS SECURY. SOURCE: SUPPLIEDTHE UPCROFTS SAY THEY THK IS IMPORTANT THEIR SONS MATA NTACT WH THEIR BIRTH MOTHER."WE HAVE A REALLY FLUID RELATNSHIP WH THEIR BIRTH MUM," BRENDAN UPCROFT SAYS."WE MA A LOT OF MMENTS TO HER OM OUR VERY FIRST MEETG, AND WE'VE WORKED REALLY HARD TO MAKE SURE THAT ALL OF THOSE MMENTS HAVE BEEN MET OR, SOME S, SURPASSED. THE DAYS, 'S LS OF A VISATN SCHLE AND MORE OF JT AN ARRANGEMENT WHEREBY WE TCH UP."THE BIRTH MOTHER RECENTLY SPENT AN ENTIRE DAY WH THE BOYS AND HAS JOED THEM FOR BIRTHDAYS. SHARE4 M READPUBLISHED 23 MARCH 2018 2:21PMUPDATED 26 MARCH 2018 7:38AMBY PEGGY GIAKOUMELOSTAGSSOCIAL ISSUSHARE THIS WH FAY AND IENDSCOPY LKSHAREREMEND FOR YOU
• 10 GAY ADOPTN FACTS THAT YOU NEED TO KNOW
• JAGUARS NFL ACH OUT AS GAY US SPORTS FIRST

FROM FOSTER TO 'FOREVER' PARENTS: ONE GAY UPLE'S PATH TO ADOPTNDPE SAME-SEX ADOPTN BEG LEGAL ACROSS THE ENTIRE UNTRY - AND WA LEADG THE WAY 16 YEARS AGO - 'S FAR OM AN EASY ROAD TO CREATG A FAY.THE UPCROFTS ON A FAY HOLIDAY. SOURCE: SUPPLIEDTHIS MONTH THE NORTHERN TERRORY BEME THE LAST OF ATRALIA'S STAT AND TERRORI TO LET GAY UPL ADOPT. THE TERRORY PARLIAMENT AGREED TO CHANGE AN ADOPTN LAW THAT HAD PREVLY LIMED THE RIGHT TO ADOPT CHILDREN TO MARRIED HETEROSEXUAL UPL, OR THOSE TRADNAL ABORIGAL MARRIAG.IN ALAI, FLRS UNIVERSY ASSOCIATE PROFSOR DAMIEN RIGGS HAS REARCHED FOSTER RE AND ADOPTN ATRALIA AND SAYS THERE ARE STILL SOME BARRIERS TO SAME-SEX ADOPTN.HE SAYS FOSTER-RE AGENCI N STILL REJECT APPLITNS OM LGBTIQ PEOPLE ON RELIG GROUNDS, RCG THE RAT OF ADOPTN BY SAME-SEX UPL. "THERE STILL IS A POSSIBILY THAT SOME AGENCI WOULD SAY, 'NO, WE WON'T ASSS THAT ONE,' SO THAT HAS KNOCK-ON EFFECTS FOR ADOPTN, IF 'S ADOPTN OM RE," DR RIGGS SAYS. "IF YOU N'T BEE A RER THE FIRST PLACE, THEN THAT'S GOG TO LIM YOUR ADOPTN OPTNS." DR RIGGS SAYS, WHILE THE LEGAL BARRIERS TO ADOPTN FOR SAME-SEX UPL ARE GONE, GAS REPRODUCTIVE MEDICE MEAN MANY LGBTIQ PEOPLE MAY TAKE THE SCIENTIFIC ROUTE TO CREATG A FAY."IT'S TERTG WHICH ONE HAS BEEN TAKEN UP MORE, AND I WOULD SAY THAT FOSTER RE AND ADOPTN HAS BEEN TAKEN UP LS MONLY BY LBIAN AND GAY UPL THAN HAS IVF OR SURROGACY."MAKG THE UPCROFTS AN OFFICIAL FAYEARLY ON THEIR RELATNSHIP PL AND BRENDAN UPCROFT CID THEY WANTED TO HAVE CHILDREN, A DREAM THEY HAVE ACHIEVED, FIRSTLY THROUGH FOSTERG AND, FALLY THROUGH ADOPTN. FOR THE UPLE, ADOPTG THEIR TWO FOSTER CHILDREN - SIBLGS AIDAN AND KALEB - BROUGHT A EP SENSE OF RELIEF.THE UPCROFTS ON THE DAY THE ADOPTN WAS OFFICIALLY FALISED. SOURCE: SUPPLIEDTHE TWO BOYS, AGED 13 AND 11, HAD BEEN THEIR RE SCE 2014, BUT ADOPTN WAS THE FAL STEP THE FORMATN OF THE FAY OM THE NEW SOUTH WAL REGNAL CY OF MALAND.PL UPCROFT SAYS THAT WHEN HE HAD ASKED HIS YOUNGT SON HOW HE FELT ABOUT THE ADOPTN, HE RPOND WH RERVED ENTHIASM. "KALEB, WE MENTNED TO HIM THAT FRIDAY'S THE DAY WE'RE GOG TO THE URT TO SEE THE JUDGE," MR UPCROFT RELLS.BROTHERS KALEB AND AIDAN WERE FOSTER RE FOR NE YEARS BEFORE THEY WERE ADOPTED BY BRENDAN AND PL UPCROFT. SOURCE: SUPPLIED"IT JT SORT OF WENT OVER HIM. AND I ASKED HIM THE NEXT DAY, AND HE SAID, 'OH, 'S ALL ON THE SI, 'S ALL ON THE SI.' SO, THEY LOVE BEG PART OF THE UPCROFT FAY." ATRALIAN INSTUTE OF HEALTH AND WELFARE STATISTICS SHOW MORE THAN 46,000 ATRALIAN CHILDREN NOW LIVE OUT-OF-HOME RE, WH MORE THAN 40 PER CENT RE FOR AT LEAST FIVE YEARS. KALEB AND AIDAN HAVE SPENT MUCH OF THEIR SHORT LIV FOSTER RE, TOO, BUT, WHEN BOTH AGREED TO BE ADOPTED BY THE UPCROFTS, THE CHANGE WAS MA. BRENDAN UPCROFT SAYS, FOR HIS PARTNER AND HIM, WAS ABOUT GIVG THE BOYS A SENSE OF SECURY. "THE OTHER DRIVER BEHD MOVG TO ADOPTN WAS THE STABILY THAT PROVIS OUR SONS. AIDAN AND KALEB HAVE NOW BEEN FOSTER RE FOR ALMOST NE YEARS. AND WHILST 'S BEEN A VERY STABLE THREE-AND-A-HALF YEARS LIVG WH , ALWAYS HANGG OVER THEIR HEADS IS THE FACT THAT THGS ULD CHANGE, THE AGENCY ULD SUDNLY E AND SAY TO THEM, 'RIGHT, WE NEED TO MOVE YOU TO A DIFFERENT PLACEMENT.'"NOW, THEY HAVE STABILY, AND THEY'LL BE WH THEIR PARENTS NOW FOREVER."BLOGIL PARENTS N STILL PLAY A ROLE CHILDREN'S LIVDPE THE CREASGLY LONG-TERM NATURE OF OUT-OF-HOME RE, FEW LONG-TERM PLACEMENTS LEAD TO ADOPTN.LAST YEAR, JT 315 ADOPTNS WERE FALISED ATRALIA, CLUDG TERNATNAL ADOPTNS, WH ABOUT 45 PER CENT BY KNOWN RERS SUCH AS FOSTER PARENTS OR RELATIV.AMONG LOL ADOPTNS, ABOUT 88 PER CENT ALLOW SOME GREE OF NTACT OR THE EXCHANGE OF RMATN BETWEEN BLOGIL AND ADOPTIVE FAI.BRENDAN UPCROFT SAY ADOPTN HAS GIVEN THE BOYS SECURY. SOURCE: SUPPLIEDTHE UPCROFTS SAY THEY THK IS IMPORTANT THEIR SONS MATA NTACT WH THEIR BIRTH MOTHER."WE HAVE A REALLY FLUID RELATNSHIP WH THEIR BIRTH MUM," BRENDAN UPCROFT SAYS."WE MA A LOT OF MMENTS TO HER OM OUR VERY FIRST MEETG, AND WE'VE WORKED REALLY HARD TO MAKE SURE THAT ALL OF THOSE MMENTS HAVE BEEN MET OR, SOME S, SURPASSED. THE DAYS, 'S LS OF A VISATN SCHLE AND MORE OF JT AN ARRANGEMENT WHEREBY WE TCH UP."THE BIRTH MOTHER RECENTLY SPENT AN ENTIRE DAY WH THE BOYS AND HAS JOED THEM FOR BIRTHDAYS. SHARE4 M READPUBLISHED 23 MARCH 2018 2:21PMUPDATED 26 MARCH 2018 7:38AMBY PEGGY GIAKOUMELOSTAGSSOCIAL ISSUSHARE THIS WH FAY AND IENDSCOPY LKSHAREREMEND FOR YOU

”Jonathan says he didn’t want to pursue the adoptn pathway Atralia, after watchg several of his iends beg the procs and then, after several years, give were subject to vasive qutns about their “liftyle”, others experienced more blatant homophobia. Stereotyp of gay male sexualy would have that gay men are unvolved and unterted parentg or children (see Barret & Robson, 2000; Bozett, 1987; Mallon, 2004), or that their sexual nduct is patible wh formg or raisg fai wh children (Barret & Robson, 2000; Stacey, 2004).

Such arguments are not based on a prehensive asssment of the evince for this claim and are ually rmed by relig or iologil beliefs about what nstut a rearch paper scrib the diverse characteristics of same-sex parented fai Atralia, their support needs and experienc, and the challeng they may face given the stigma and discrimatn often attached to homosexualy and enuntered by some same-sex upl. In this report, "same-sex parented fai" is ed when the pot beg ma is relevant to all non-heterosexual fai, and "lbian-parented" or "gay-parented" when the pot relat to fai head by female and male same-sex upl or sole parents, is also important to note that "lbian" and "gay" are not universally ed as self-scriptors by women and men who are parentg the ntext of a same-sex relatnship or inty.

10 GAY ADOPTN FACTS THAT YOU NEED TO KNOW

Some Atralian same-sex attracted parents (ditns are, a small mory) may nsir themselv "bisexual" or refer to themselv as "queer" rather than "lbian" or "gay" bee they have sexual or romantic relatnships wh people of both sex (see Power et al., 2010; Power, Perlz, Brown et al., 2012).

JAGUARS NFL ACH OUT AS GAY US SPORTS FIRST

It is much more mon for female than male same-sex upl to have children livg the hoehold (22% pared wh 3%; ABS, 2012), a trend that is echoed lbian, gay, bisexual and transgenr (LGBT) muny-based surveys nducted wh women and men. In Private Liv 2 - a recent natnal Atralian survey of 3, 835 LGBT people's relatnships, health and wellbeg - about 11% of gay male participants dited that they were parents or step-parents, or had some other kd of parent-like relatnship wh children, as opposed to 33% of lbian participants (Leonard et al., 2012).

Consirably more bisexual men than gay men the study reported havg children (40% vs 11%), wh bisexual men also more likely than bisexual women (40% vs 25%) to report havg parented fai are characteristilly diverse wh regard to mo of nceptn or fay formatn, and fay stcture (see Anrssen, Aie, & Ytteroy, 2002; Biblarz & Savci, 2010; Gunn & Surte, 2009; Power et al., 2010; Tasker & Patterson, 2007; Weeks et al., 2001). In s where Atralian lbian or gay parents are raisg adopted children, is highly likely the children were adopted the ntext of a prev heterosexual relatnship due to the legal prohibn on same-sex adoptn Atralian stat and terrori.

Further to this, and for a range of reasons, very few Atralian children bee available for adoptn beyond their fai of orig (see Higgs, 2012) Work, Love and Play study (Power et al., 2010) of 445 Atralian and New Zealanr lbian, gay, bisexual, transgenr and tersex (LGBTI) parents is the largt this untry unrtaken to date and found there are six major fay typ:a two-parent same-sex uple-based fay;fai which a lbian uple were the primary parents but a known sperm donor lived separately and had volvement the children's liv;fai which a lbian or gay man were still -parentg wh an ex-heterosexual partner;separated same-sex fai where women or men were -parentg wh their ex-same-sex partner;sole parent fai; andmulti-parent fai, ually a gay male uple and a lbian uple raisg children together om birth across two hoeholds.

Children may have been nceived the ntext of prev heterosexual relatnships, or raised om birth by a -parentg gay or lbian uple or sgle tentnally planned lbian or gay parented fai, is mon for children to be nceived through assisted reproductive technologi (ART) such as donor sematn (DI), -vro fertilizatn (IVF) and surrogacy.

Lbian-parented faiLbian-parented faiFar more published rearch exists on the characteristics and experienc of lbian parented fai than fai parented by gay men (see Anrsson et al., 2002; Biblarz & Savci, 2010; Patterson, 2007; Short et al.

(2010) pared the divisns of labour of 317 habg Atralian and New Zealanr lbian and gay parents who took part the Work, Love and Playstudy wh 958 habg heterosexual parents takg part the Atralian Negotiatg the Life Course study. Women's fathers, brothers and heterosexual or gay male iends are known to be valued as "male role mols" for children, due to lbian parents' sire for children to have accs to diverse adult male and female social works (Borthwick & Bloch, 1993; Gartrell et al., 1996; Goldberg & Allen, 2007; Wakelg & Bradstock, 1995) msag: Lbian-parented faiLbian -parentg upl tend to divi their hoehold labour and child re rponsibili more equably than heterosexual upl. Fai parented by gay menFai parented by gay menGay fatherhood rearch prr to the late 1990s tend to be US-based and emphasised the experienc of divorced gay fathers who had had children heterosexual marriag, mostly wh regard to issu associated wh disclosg their gay relatnships or inty to children, and their perceptns of children's adjtment to their homosexualy (see Barret & Robson, 2000; Bigner & Bozett, 1990; Bozett, 1987; Miller, 1979).