Is Your Man Gay, Straight, or Bisexual? | Psychology Today

Contents:

• IS IT POSSIBLE TO SYSTEMATILLY TURN GAY PEOPLE STRAIGHT?
• CAN SCTN MAKE STRAIGHT MEN GAY?
• CAN GAYS BEE STRAIGHT?
• CAN SOME GAY MEN AND LBIANS CHANGE THEIR SEXUAL ORIENTATN? 200 PARTICIPANTS REPORTG A CHANGE OM HOMOSEXUAL TO HETEROSEXUAL ORIENTATN
• THE FACT NO ONE LIK TO ADM: MANY GAY MEN ULD JT HAVE EASILY BEEN STRAIGHT
• SOME GAYS CAN GO STRAIGHT, STUDY SAYS
• IS YOUR MAN GAY, STRAIGHT, OR BISEXUAL?
• IS MY HBAND GAY? SIGNS OF A GAY HBAND

IS IT POSSIBLE TO SYSTEMATILLY TURN GAY PEOPLE STRAIGHT?

” Many people, cludg sex rearchers and scientists, believe that sexual orientatn is like a sle wh entirely gay on one end and entirely straight on the other. Yet when the men were forced to choose between straight, bisexual or gay, about three-quarters marked straight bee for them bisexual, even if is unrstood as “bisexual-leang straight, ” is too gay to accurately scribe their inty. He may retreat om a full intifitn wh heterosexualy, but rarely do he gravate toward bisexualy, and almost never do he move toward homosexualy of any sort.

"If [a patient] n accept his bodily homoerotic experience while stayg nnected to the therapist, " he wrote The Paradox of Self-Acceptance, "the sexual feelg soon transforms to somethg else: the regnn of eper, pa-generated emotnal needs which have nothg to do wh sexualy. Both APAs have led that the therapi are unscientific and possibly harmful — not to mentn unnecsary, sce homosexualy was officially -classified as an illns 1973, and therefore n't be "cured.

The few that did have "high-qualy" evince "show that endurg change to an dividual's sexual orientatn is unmon, " and that treatments tend to change sexual orientatn may e harm, cludg prsn and mental Dark AgHomosexualy was officially labeled a mental illns the U. Another method was satiatn therapy, which a subject was told to masturbate over and over while verbally scribg his homosexual fantasi, until they disappeared — or, at least, "therapi" were generally effective — the person remaed attracted to the same sex — or over-effective — the person was trmatized and lost all sexual aroal entirely. They "were ed whout people thkg about whether they were humane, " Glassgold all treatments were so gome: Lnel Ovey, a Columbia Universy psychoanalyst and thor of Homosexualy and Psdohomosexualy, created a behavral method the 1960s.

CAN SCTN MAKE STRAIGHT MEN GAY?

Ovey studied a clilly disturbed group of patients and summarized their unnsc mds as follows: "I am a failure = I am not a man = I am strated = I am a woman = I am a homosexual. " His view mirrored the belief of many clicians at the time: that homosexualy was based on a phobia of the oppose non-aversive treatments followg this theory foced on buildg "tnal skills" like datg techniqu, assertivens trag, and affectn achg to crease teractns wh women. Cognive therapists, meanwhile, ma a few attempts to change homosexuals' thought patterns by reamg sir — redirectg thoughts away om homosexual activy — or through hypnosis.

Still, SOCE is still beg practiced wh a small group of mental-health practners, most of whom ter to a populatn whose relig beliefs strictly bar homosexualy. Two of his buddi were like, 'How do you know him?' He answered, 'We hooked up a few weeks ago.' His buddi got all homophobic on him, so he asked, 'You guys have never msed around wh another guy?' They both got really quiet. The article rais the qutn of changg sexual preference: Can a man whose past sexual practice has been almost exclively heterosexual change his practice to homosexual after beg sced by another man?

" Contrary to this rponse, the thor prents three s which the men swch om heterosexual to homosexual relatnships (exclively two s) by means of a sexual enunter iated by another man. The evince that the men experienced a genue change sexual preference, shows that life-long, exclive homosexualy, as articulated by gay rhetoric, is more a statement about the culture which occurs than the "sence" of homosexualy.

CAN GAYS BEE STRAIGHT?

IN THESE days when no TV s is plete whout a gay character or two, when openly gay men and women are erng ci, and when all thory matters of style and fashn has been ced to the queer eye, you might thk that succs-oriented heterosexuals would be lg up for nversn to homosexualy. A mory of the men I terviewed were homophobic and held prejudice agast LGBTQ2+ people and this prejudice mak the thought of an LGBTQ2+ inty unappealg to them. Sce 1975, APA has lled on psychologists to take the lead removg the stigma of mental illns that has long been associated wh lbian, gay, and bisexual orientatns.

The prejudice and discrimatn that people who intify as lbian, gay, or bisexual regularly experience have been shown to have negative psychologil effects.

CAN SOME GAY MEN AND LBIANS CHANGE THEIR SEXUAL ORIENTATN? 200 PARTICIPANTS REPORTG A CHANGE OM HOMOSEXUAL TO HETEROSEXUAL ORIENTATN

This page provis accurate rmatn for those who want to better unrstand sexual orientatn and the impact of prejudice and discrimatn on those who intify as lbian, gay, or bisexual. In the Uned Stat the most equent labels are lbians (women attracted to women), gay men (men attracted to men), and bisexual people (men or women attracted to both sex). Prejudice and discrimatn make difficult for many people to e to terms wh their sexual orientatn inti, so claimg a lbian, gay, or bisexual inty may be a slow procs.

Public opn studi over the 1970s, 1980s, and 1990s routely showed that, among large segments of the public, lbian, gay, and bisexual people were the target of strongly held negative attus. More recently, public opn has creasgly opposed sexual orientatn discrimatn, but exprsns of hostily toward lbians and gay men rema mon ntemporary Amerin society. Early the panmic, the assumptn that HIV/AIDS was a “gay disease” ntributed to the lay addrsg the massive social upheaval that AIDS would generate.

The associatn of HIV/AIDS wh gay and bisexual men and the accurate belief that some people held that all gay and bisexual men were fected served to further stigmatize lbian, gay, and bisexual people. The stereotyp persist even though they are not supported by evince, and they are often ed to exce unequal treatment of lbian, gay, and bisexual people.

THE FACT NO ONE LIK TO ADM: MANY GAY MEN ULD JT HAVE EASILY BEEN STRAIGHT

For example, limatns on job opportuni, parentg, and relatnship regnn are often jtified by stereotypic assumptns about lbian, gay, and bisexual people. On an dividual level, such prejudice and discrimatn may also have negative nsequenc, pecially if lbian, gay, and bisexual people attempt to nceal or ny their sexual orientatn. Although many lbians and gay men learn to pe wh the social stigma agast homosexualy, this pattern of prejudice n have ser negative effects on health and well-beg.

Although social support is ccial pg wh strs, antigay attus and discrimatn may make difficult for lbian, gay, and bisexual people to fd such support.

Dpe the persistence of stereotyp that portray lbian, gay, and bisexual people as disturbed, several s of rearch and clil experience have led all mastream medil and mental health anizatns this untry to nclu that the orientatns reprent normal forms of human experience. Furthermore, seems likely that the promotn of change therapi rerc stereotyp and ntribut to a negative climate for lbian, gay, and bisexual persons.

SOME GAYS CAN GO STRAIGHT, STUDY SAYS

Helpful rpons of a therapist treatg an dividual who is troubled about her or his same sex attractns clu helpg that person actively pe wh social prejudic agast homosexualy, succsfully rolve issu associated wh and rultg om ternal nflicts, and actively lead a happy and satisfyg life. The phrase “g out” is ed to refer to several aspects of lbian, gay, and bisexual persons’ experienc: self-awarens of same-sex attractns; the tellg of one or a few people about the attractns; wispread disclosure of same-sex attractns; and intifitn wh the lbian, gay, and bisexual muny. Th, is not surprisg that lbians and gay men who feel they mt nceal their sexual orientatn report more equent mental health ncerns than do lbians and gay men who are more open; they may even have more physil health problems.

IS YOUR MAN GAY, STRAIGHT, OR BISEXUAL?

Some adolcents sire and engage same-sex behavr but do not intify as lbian, gay, or bisexual, sometim bee of the stigma associated wh a nonheterosexual orientatn. Young people who intify as lbian, gay, or bisexual may be more likely to face certa problems, cludg beg bullied and havg negative experienc school.

IS MY HBAND GAY? SIGNS OF A GAY HBAND

Lbian, gay, and bisexual youth who do well spe strs—like all adolcents who do well spe strs—tend to be those who are socially petent, who have good problem-solvg skills, who have a sense of tonomy and purpose, and who look forward to the future. Whether the youths intify as heterosexual or as lbian, gay, or bisexual, they enunter prejudice and discrimatn based on the prumptn that they are lbian, gay, or bisexual. If they are a heterosexual relatnship, their experienc may be que siar to those of people who intify as heterosexual unls they choose to e out as bisexual; that se, they will likely face some of the same prejudice and discrimatn that lbian and gay dividuals enunter.