Tell kids why sayg someone's gay shouldn't be an sult | CNN

Contents:

• HELP! I THK MY KID IS GAY
• IS YOUR CHILD GAY?
• A DAD’S ADVICE TO NEIGHBORHOOD KIDS: DON’T E GAY AS AN SULT
• EARLY SIGNS TO TELL YOUR CHILD IS GAY
• HOW TO TELL IF YOUR KID IS GAY
• WHEN YOUR CHILD IS GAY

HELP! I THK MY KID IS GAY

As a 30-year-old gay man, I’ve met a lot of other queer people who also hid parts of themselv childhood.

Experimentg wh femy the safety of the home — even somethg as mcule as selectg girl characters vio gam and livg virly through her abily to kick ass — seems to be a shared gay experience for many of . None of this mak a person gay, of urse.

IS YOUR CHILD GAY?

It feels remiscent of the adoratn that gay fans hold toward old Hollywood beti like Joan Crawford and Judy Garland, or the pageant-style exaggeratns of femy that unrpned so much of early drag culture. Barbie has been the subject of the same gay diva worship over the years, and Gerwig’s film promently featurg LGBTQ+ actors feels like a nod to that history. Part of Barbie’s gay appeal might be that, spe beg plastic and unmalleable, she n transform herself to anythg: doctor, lawyer, judge, journalist, and vet, or whatever Mattel thks will sell the most dolls.

) As the world’s most famo doll, she has been st as both an aspiratnal hero and a rctive villa — the gay world, this polarizg dualy often turns women to ins. After I me out as gay, I spent a lot of my younger adult life reilg when people said that they “already knew.

A DAD’S ADVICE TO NEIGHBORHOOD KIDS: DON’T E GAY AS AN SULT

Now, I feel proud of my ltle gay self for havg the urage to play wh those fabulo dolls — and of my parents for buyg me the toys I wanted, not the on I was supposed to like. They immediately clocked as gay, while we immediately clocked them as we warmed up to another, one mom anxly said: "I have a qutn: I am pretty sure my son is gay, but I don't know what to do. "For example, if someone the word "gay" place of "stupid, " remd them that the two are not terchangeable, and suggt they should say what they actually mean stead.

EARLY SIGNS TO TELL YOUR CHILD IS GAY

"The rourc n help:PFLAG: The untry’s largt anizatn ung parents, fai, and alli wh people who are lbian, gay, bisexual, transgenr, and Spectm: Offers groups, trag, and rourc promotg genr sensivy and cln for all youthGLBT Natnal Rource Database: LGBTQ+ digal directory of rourcNatnal Queer and Trans Therapists of Color Network: Directory of therapists/unselors who are people of lorNatnal LGBTQ Task Force: The progrsive advocy arm of the LGBTQ+ movementDurg LGBTQ Pri Month, TODAY is sharg the muny’s history, pa, joy and what’s next for the movement. Over the years, Magic and Cookie have been open about their rponsibili as parents — like when Magic told Ellen DeGener that he was "so happy" when their son EJ me out as gay.

HOW TO TELL IF YOUR KID IS GAY

EJ publicly me out as gay 2013, though he me out to his fay several years earlier.

In 2014, EJ told PEOPLE that, although his parents "pretty much already knew" that he was gay, they were worried about the public's reactn. As I relayed When Your Child Is Gay: What You Need To Know (Sterlg, 2016), I found out that my son was gay om a note wh our son's name entwed wh another boy's, surround by a heart. I had spected at tim that he was gay.

Had I asked him if he were gay when he was 13, he probably would have fensively said "No!

WHEN YOUR CHILD IS GAY

San Berland, the mother of a gay son who ach parents of LGBTQ kids, utn, "It's not a good ia to ask. Acrdg to my -thor, psychiatrist Jonathan Tobk, "Gay children feel credibly vulnerable when g out to their parents, and tak time to work up the urage to do this. Mol acceptance by not g gay slurs and never tellg gay jok.

Watch gay-themed shows together such as "The Fosters" and "Will and Grace. " How do they pict gay people?