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meet the spartans i m not gay

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‘In gay years, you’re rather past your sell-by date, aren’t you?’ the person ont of me said, raisg an eyebrow. 

Contents:

I MET THE SPARTANS ... SO THAT YOU DON'T HAVE {FONT:NORMAL 800 1.2REM/1.2 "D BOLD",SANS-SERIF;TEXT-TRANSFORM:NORMAL;LOR:HER;DISPLAY:LE-BLOCK;PADDG-BOTTOM:6PX;POSN:RELATIVE;TEXT-TRANSFORM:UPPERSE;}{BACKGROUND:#89308A;BOTTOM:0;NTENT:'';DISPLAY:BLOCK;HEIGHT:2PX;LEFT:0;POSN:ABSOLUTE;RIGHT:0;-WEBK-TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;WIDTH:100%;}{LEFT:51%;RIGHT:51%;WIDTH:0;}{FONT:NORMAL 800 1.2REM/1.2 "D BOLD",SANS-SERIF;TEXT-TRANSFORM:NORMAL;LOR:HER;DISPLAY:LE-BLOCK;PADDG-BOTTOM:6PX;POSN:RELATIVE;TEXT-TRANSFORM:UPPERSE;}{BACKGROUND:#89308A;BOTTOM:0;NTENT:'';DISPLAY:BLOCK;HEIGHT:2PX;LEFT:0;POSN:ABSOLUTE;RIGHT:0;-WEBK-TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;WIDTH:100%;}{LEFT:51%;RIGHT:51%;WIDTH:0;}MOVIBY LYLE MASAKIJANUARY 28, 2008/3:36 PMBY LYLE MASAKIJANUARY 28, 2008 / 3:36 PM{"@NTEXT":","@TYPE":"NEWSARTICLE","HEADLE":"I MET THE SPARTANS ... SO THAT YOU DON'T HAVE TO","DATEPUBLISHED":"2008-01-28T20:36:34.000+0000","DATEMODIFIED":"2008-01-28T20:36:34.000+0000","IMAGE":{"@NTEXT":","@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT","WIDTH":1920,"HEIGHT":1080},"URL":","THOR":{"@TYPE":"ORGANIZATN","NAME":"LOGO TV"},"MAENTYOFPAGE":{"@TYPE":"WEBPAGE","@ID":"},"PUBLISHER":{"@TYPE":"ORGANIZATN","@ID":","NAME":"LOGO TV","URL":","LOGO":{"@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT"}},"CREATOR":"LYLE MASAKI","KEYWORDS":"THE BACKLOT","ARTICLESECTN":"MOVI"}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}FRIDAY, BRIAN TOOK A LOOK AT TRAILERS FOR THIS WEEKEND'S MEET THE SPARTANS AND WONRED IF THE 300-SPIRED PARODY WOULD FOLLOW THE HOMOPHOBIC TONE OF S SPIRATN OR MANAGE TO MOCK {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}SCE THE SRY MOVIE FILMS ARE A GUILTY PLEASURE OF ME AND I'M ALWAYS EAGER TO SEE THE MACHISMO OF FRANK MILLER (WHO WROTE AND DREW THE GRAPHIC NOVEL THAT 300 WAS BASED ON) GET MOCKED, I CID TO SEE MEET THE SPARTANS AND JUDGE FOR MYSELF. SADLY, AFTER SEEG THE MOVIE, I THK JUDGG MEET THE SPARTANS AS HOMOPHOBIC OR SUBVERSIVE IS GIVG A LTLE TO MUCH CRED. SPARTANS IS A DIRECTNLS AND POORLY PACED GAG-FT (SOME OF THE WEAKT PARODI GET WAY TOO MUCH SCREEN TIME AND THERE ARE TOO MANY MOMENTS WAG FOR SOMETHG FUNNY TO HAPPEN). IT BLUDGEONS EVERY JOKE TO ATH, SEEMGLY BEE THE SCRIPT WASN'T LONG ENOUGH TO WHSTAND ANY SELECTIVE {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}I WANTED TO GIVE MEET THE SPARTANS THE BENEF OF THE DOUBT; THE FILM MAK E OF A FEW MAD TV VETS LIKE IKE BARHOLTZ AND NILE PARKER, WHO GAVE SOME GREAT GAY-THEMED EDY SKETCH. (PARKER'S SPOT-ON IMATNS ARE EASILY THE BT THG ABOUT MEET THE SPARTANS, ASI OM THE NSTANT BEEFKE, WHICH, SADLY, ISN'T SAYG MUCH NSIRG HOW EQUENTLY SHE APPEARS.) FDG A PROMOTNAL CLIP FOR THE MOVIE WHERE KEV SORBO, KEN DAVIAN AND DIEDRICH BAR TALK WH CARRIE KEAGAN ABOUT WOMEN FDG MALE/MALE SEXUALY HOT, WHOUT A HT OF CRGG OR {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}NSFW LANGUAGE THE CLIP BELOW:{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}A LOT OF THE GAGS MEET THE SPARTANS PLAY HEAVILY TO GAY STEREOTYP. WHEN THE PERSIAN EMISSARY (METHOD MAN) FIRST LOOKS AROUND SPARTA, HE SE MALE UPL STANDG TOGETHER STEAMY POS. XERX' (DAVIAN) "HIGH FIVE" GTURE LEAV THE SPARTANS LGHG FOR BEG A B LIMP-WRISTED. WHEN THE SPARTANS MARCH FORMATN, THEY HOLD HANDS AND SKIP MERRILY WHILE SGG "I WILL SURVIVE" TOGETHER. WHEN THE CAPTA (SORBO) PRENTS THE ARMY TO SEAN MAGUIRE'S LEONIDAS, TURNS OUT THAT LEONIDAS HAS MAND SOLDIERS WHO WERE "HUNKY WH EP MEDERRANEAN TANS, HOT BODS AND ... WELL ENDOWED".{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}IN A GRAND THEFT AUTO PARODY, LEONIDAS CHANG THE R RAD TO A STATN PLAYG AQUA'S "BARBIE GIRL" AND BEGS SGG ALONG TO THE "KEN" PART. (WHEN DID "BARBIE GIRL" OVERTAKE "IT'S RAG MEN" AS THE GAY SONG?) I KEPT WONRG DURG THE GAGS WHAT EXACTLY THE DIENCE WAS MEANT TO LGH AT: WAS A GAG THAT "SISSI ARE RIDICULO," OR A BCHY RPONSE TO THE WAY 300 STRAIGHT-WASHED THE SPARTANS' HISTORY OF GAY RELATNSHIPS? EVENTUALLY, I CID THE TENT DON'T MATTER SCE MEET THE SPARTANS LEFT ROOM FOR HOMOPHOBIC DIENC TO LGH AT A BUNCH OF SILLY FAIRI, IF THAT'S THE JOKE THAT THEY WANTED TO {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}MEET THE SPARTANS ALSO HAS PLENTY OF GROSS-OUT HUMOR, CLUDG ONE B WHERE DIENC ARE MEANT TO GO "EWWW!" AT THE HT OF GAY MALE SEXUALY WHEN LEONIDAS GREETS THE PERSIAN EMISSARY WH AN OPEN-MOUTHED KISS. IT'S POSSIBLE TO E TWO GUYS KISSG FOR GROSS-OUT HUMOR WHOUT A HOMOPHOBIC TONE (TALLAGA NIGHTS, THE KIDS THE HALL AND THE OFFICE HAVE ACPLISHED THAT) BUT MEET THE SPARTANS DON'T HAVE THAT KD OF SUBTLE TOUCH AND 'S NOT AIMED AT AN DIENCE THAT N SEPARATE THE TWO. MORE GROSS-OUT HUMOR IS EMPLOYED WHEN GUY'S FACE CLOSE TO ANOTHER GUY'S CROTCH ... 'S ALL STUFF SEEN BEFORE OTHER MOVI (BORAT, FOR EXAMPLE), BUT WH ALL THE GAY JOK THERE'S A VERY DIFFERENT TONE TO THE {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}STILL, MEET THE SPARTANS HAD A UPLE REEMG MOMENTS. AT ONE POT, THE MOVIE TURNS TO A PARODY OF THE BUDWEISER'S "REAL MEN OF GENI" ADS, LABELG LEONIDAS "MR. WARMONGERG LATENT HOMOSEXUAL", A MOMENT THAT'S UNQUTNABLY MOCKS THE WAY 300 TRIED SO HARD TO OVERLOOK 'S HOMOEROTIC QUALI. ADDNALLY, WHEN CHRIS CROCKER'S "LEAVE BRNEY ALONE" VIO APPEARS, THE JOKE IS ONE OF MEET THE SPARTANS' SUBTLER MOMENTS. (WE'RE TALKG SUBTLE A RELATIVE SENSE.) IT STARTS AS A TRANSFORMERS PARODY, WHEN XERX TURNS A R TO A ROBOT WH A TV SCREEN ON S CHT. WHEN THE SCREEN STARTS PLAYG CROCKER'S NOTOR VIO, THE SPARTANS ARE ENTHRALLED WH THE TECHNOLOGY (UNLIKE THE SPARTANS TRAILER WHERE THEY LGH AT CROCKER). THE JOKE IS MORE ABOUT THE TRIVIAL WAYS WE E TECHNOLOGY (XERX TALKS UP THE POWER OF HIS ROBOT, WHICH TURNS OUT SIMPLY HAS THE ABILY TO PLAY YOUTUBE CLIPS) THAN A MOCKG OF CROCKER'S EFFEMACY. (EXTRA POTS FOR TURNG THE CHANCE TO MOCK THE MISPLACED PRRI CROCKER DISPLAYS HIS "LEAVE BRNEY ALONE" VIO TO A GREATER GAG ABOUT OUR SOCIETAL PRRI.){BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}OH, AND ONE OTHER REEMG FEATURE OF MEET THE SPARTANS: TRAVIS VAN WKLE (ON THE FAR LEFT).{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}AS I MENTNED EARLIER, MEET THE SPARTANS IS JT TOO MUCH OF A MS TO FD AS A HOMOPHOBIC FOLLOW-UP OR A CLEVER TWEAK ON 300. SOME OF THE GAGS ARE CLEVER, SOME OF THE GAGS ULD GO EHER WAY, AND SOME GAGS ULD PLAY TO AN DIENCE'S HOMOPHOBIA ... BUT MOST OF THE HUMOR FALLS FLAT AND SPARTANS, OVERALL, LACKS A STRONG ENOUGH VOICE ONE WAY OR ANOTHER. WERE ANY AFTERELTON REARS AMONG THOSE WHO MA MEET THE SPARTANS THE #1 BOX OFFICE DRAW THIS WEEKEND? WHAT DID YOU THK?{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;CLEAR:BOTH;}THE {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;MARG:0 TO;WIDTH:90%;M-WIDTH:288PX;MAX-WIDTH:1440PX;M-HEIGHT:194PX;}LATT NEWS

# I'm not gay! Warmongerg Latent Homosexual. Warmongerg Latent Homosexual!

Sanjaya Malakar: [sgg, after Leonidas kicks him to the p of ath] I'm not gay! Stat of homosexualy ancient Sparta?

[Msenger looks around and se some gay upl].

I’M 43 – BUT I’M MA TO FEEL LIKE A DOSR BY YOUNGER GAY MEN

# (shrieks) # I'm not gay! Warmongerg Latent Homosexual...

I'm not gay.

Perhaps to further strengthen the bond to fend your brother, a majory of Spartans were gay? I'm sure not every Spartan was gay of urse, but I know homosexualy was viewed differently and even embraced cultur like Rome. Friday, Brian took a look at trailers for this weekend's Meet the Spartans and wonred if the 300-spired parody would follow the homophobic tone of s spiratn or manage to mock the Sry Movie films are a guilty pleasure of me and I'm always eager to see the machismo of Frank Miller (who wrote and drew the graphic novel that 300 was based on) get mocked, I cid to see Meet the Spartans and judge for myself.

*BEAR-MAGAZINE.COM* MEET THE SPARTANS I M NOT GAY

YARN | # I'm not gay! # | Meet the Spartans (2008) | Vio clips by quot | aa255a0c | 紗 .

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