Not gay, not straight: Meet the young people who refe to fe their sexualy |

Contents:

• HOW DO I KNOW I’M NOT REALLY GAY/STRAIGHT?
• GROWG UP HIP-HOP: I’M NOT STRAIGHT AND I’M NOT GAY
• NOT GAY, NOT STRAIGHT: MEET THE YOUNG PEOPLE WHO REFE TO FE THEIR SEXUALY
• I LIKE GUYS BUT I DON’T WANT TO BE GAY. HOW DO I STOP BEG GAY?
• GAY, NOT GAY, STRAIGHT, NOT STRAIGHT
• I'M NOT GAY, STRAIGHT OR BI
• AM I GAY?
• YOU’RE NOT GAY: HOMOSEXUALY ANXIETY OCD
• PEOPLE THK I'M GAY... BUT I'M NOT

HOW DO I KNOW I’M NOT REALLY GAY/STRAIGHT?

We hear a lot about the Big Three Sexuali — straight, bisexual and gay. If you’re a young man, you might assume that eher you’re straight or you’re not, meang you’re likely gay and maybe bisexual. Yet the evince suggts that more young men intify or scribe themselv as mostly straight than intify as eher bisexual or gay bed.

Yet when the men were forced to choose between straight, bisexual or gay, about three-quarters marked straight bee for them bisexual, even if is unrstood as “bisexual-leang straight, ” is too gay to accurately scribe their inty.

Tradnally, our unrstandg has been that if you’re male and have even a slight attractn to the same sex, then you mt be gay. He knows he’s not gay, but straight wh a dash of gayns. But how much gayns?

GROWG UP HIP-HOP: I’M NOT STRAIGHT AND I’M NOT GAY

He’s not transng toward intifyg as bisexual or gay. He’s not a closeted gay man who fears beg gay yet wants to keep a slight, perhaps secretive, gay si by danglg his potential for guy sex.

He may retreat om a full intifitn wh heterosexualy, but rarely do he gravate toward bisexualy, and almost never do he move toward homosexualy of any sort. It is Mostly Straight: Sexual Fluidy Among Men, not Mostly Straight: Sexual Fluidy Among Gay Men. In orr to have doubts about one’s sexual inty, a sufferer need not ever have had a homo- or heterosexual experience, or any type of sexual experience at all.

NOT GAY, NOT STRAIGHT: MEET THE YOUNG PEOPLE WHO REFE TO FE THEIR SEXUALY

If the sufferer is heterosexual, then the thought may be that they are homosexual.

If on the other hand they happen to be homosexual they may obss about the possibily that they might really be straight. ” Some people’s doubts are further plited by havg such experienc as hearg other people talkg or lookg their directn and thkg that the people mt be analyzg their behavr or appearance and talkg about them – discsg how they mt be gay (or straight).

For those wh thoughts of beg homosexual, part of the distrs mt surely be social orig. Let’s face , gay people have always been an opprsed mory wh our culture, and to sudnly thk of beg this posn, and to be stigmatized this way, n be ighteng.

I LIKE GUYS BUT I DON’T WANT TO BE GAY. HOW DO I STOP BEG GAY?

I have sometim wonred if those who experience the most distrs om such thoughts as the do so bee they were raised wh more strongly homophobic or anti-gay attus to beg wh, or if is simply bee one’s sexualy n be such a basic doubt.

GAY, NOT GAY, STRAIGHT, NOT STRAIGHT

Lookg at attractive men or women, or pictur of them, or readg sexually oriented lerature or pornography (hetero- or homosexual), to see if they are sexually excg. Observg themselv for evince of “lookg, ” talkg, walkg, drsg, or gturg like someone who is eher gay or straight.

Compulsively reviewg and analyzg past teractns wh other men or women to see if they have acted like a gay or straight person. Readg articl on the ter about how an dividual n tell if they are gay or straight to see which group they might be most siar to.

Do you thk I uld be gay (or straight)? How n I tell if I’m really gay (or straight)?

I'M NOT GAY, STRAIGHT OR BI

Can you sudnly turn to a homosexual (or heterosexual) even if you have never felt or acted that that way? Do I look (or act) gay (or straight) to you? If I get sexual sensatns when viewg sexual material of an oppose orientatn do mean I am gay (or straight)?

AM I GAY?

A typil example would be a heterosexual man who experienc an erectn while lookg at gay eroti. This reactn is strengthened by the rrect belief that homosexual cu never stimulate heterosexuals. Avoidg standg close to, touchg or bshg agast members of the same sex (or oppose sex if the sufferer is gay).

Not readg or lookg at vios news reports books or articl havg anythg to do wh gay people or other sexual subjects. Never sayg the words “gay, ” “homosexual, ” (or “straight”) or any other related term.

Tryg to not look or act effemately (if a man), or a mascule way (if a woman), (or vice versa if the sufferer is gay). Not drsg ways that would make one look effemate (if a man), or mascule (if a woman), (aga vice versa if the sufferer is gay).

YOU’RE NOT GAY: HOMOSEXUALY ANXIETY OCD

Avoidg associatg wh anyone who may be gay or who seems to lean that directn (if the sufferer is heterosexual). The flip si of this is when they look at thgs havg to do wh sex of an oppose orientatn and then feel aroed some way, which they then nclu to mean that they liked , which means that they are gay (or straight). Readg books by or about gay persons.

Watchg vios on gay them or about gay characters. Visg gay meetgs shops, browsg gay bookstor, or visg areas of town that are more predomantly gay.

PEOPLE THK I'M GAY... BUT I'M NOT

Wearg a T-shirt at home wh the word ‘gay’ on . Dog a seri of wrg assignments of a uple of pag each that suggt more and more that you actually are gay or wish to be. Makg a seri of three-mute tap that based on the wrgs gradually suggt more and more that you are gay, and listeng to them several tim a day changg them when they no longer bother you).

Avoid observg yourself to see if you behaved a way you image a homosexual or member of the oppose sex would.

Gay. A gay person is someone who is attracted to people of their same genr, and the term is often ed to scribe men who are attracted to other men.