Gay or Straight, A Male Is a Male Is a Male | Psychology Today

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Gay sexual preferenc are surprisgly siar to those of straight men.

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GAY OR STRAIGHT, A MALE IS A MALE IS A MALE

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class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--cm-riser"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></div><div class="SpaceHolr-oayp fXtswJ ad-height-hold"></div><div class="StickyHeroAdWrapper-eNLJUc gStsdY ad-stickyhero ad-stickyhero--standard ad-stickyhero-enable-mobile should-hold-space"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--hero"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--hero" data-no-id="m69puz"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-hero" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-hero"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></div><div class="SpaceHolr-oayp fXtswJ ad-height-hold"></div><ma id="ma-ntent" tabx="-1" class="BasePageMaContent-kFvAuh ewPCZH page__ma-ntent"><article class="article ma-ntent" lang="en-US"><div class="ArticlePageLeBackground-EufvU tFsh"><hear class="ContentHearWrapper-clujbs kaZCaf ntent-hear article__ntent-hear"><div data-ttid="ContentHearContaer" class="ContentHearContaer-cGKRbE knDxNq"><div class="ContentHearHedAccredatnWrapper-GFiQf cDNVlV"><div data-ttid="ContentHearTleBlockWrapper" class="ContentHearTleBlockWrapper-cjmSKp cCntXd"><div data-ttid="ContentHearRubric" class="ContentHearRubricBlock-LmpbT eRFpQc"><div data-ttid="ContentHearRubricDateBlock" class="ContentHearRubricDateBlock-kAQcZP fTFWxD"><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX kpuNXj bric ContentHearRubricContaer-eTudtt iRsSlw"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">Sex</span></div></div></div><h1 data-ttid="ContentHearHed" class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ ContentHearHed-NCyCC iUEiRd jPOabC BjYFU">Why Straight Men Are Jog Masturbatn Clubs</h1></div><div class="ContentHearAccredatn-lfctVB etVsnJ ntent-hear__accredatn" data-ttid="ContentHearAccredatn"><div class="ContentHearDek-bIqFFZ eASNBN">For some men, takg an act that's tradnally solary and potentially shameful, and stead turng to a munal bondg experience, n be powerfully eeg.</div><div class="ContentHearByle-kmPyCa emiglw"><div class="ContentHearByleContent-dpPmNn DRFq"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl ContentHearByl-cZqgyJ bHLeKI"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH gtxxjM byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd dlWgVJ gnILss byle__preamble">By </span><a class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BaseLk-eNWuiM ByleLk-gEnFiw iUEiRd fhQbnq dzFUnH eErqIx byle__name-lk button" href="/ntributor/ej-dickson">EJ Dickson</a></span></span></p></div><time data-ttid="ContentHearPublishDate" dateTime="2019-02-26T16:53:21-05:00" class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ ContentHearPublishDate-eIBicG iUEiRd ivrQAn cZpOSL">Febary 26, 2019</time></div></div><div class="SocialInsWrapper-hKMEXV ffgPVr social-ins social-ins--standard ContentHearAccredatnSocialIns-jorO fPzfaa ntent-hear__social-share"><ul data-ttid="socialInslist" class="SocialInsList-cHVTIA ivmblD social-ins__list"></ul></div></div></div><div class="ContentHearLeadAsset-hGbumP fEknXh lead-asset ContentHearLeadAssetWrapper-hfXHEc Grck lead-asset--width-fullbleed" data-ttid="ContentHearLeadAsset"><figure class="ContentHearLeadAssetContent-kOfYSG dRGWbI"><div class="ContentHearLeadAssetContentMedia-bLEIpi jjhWdS lead-asset__ntent__photo"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW jvZaPI rponsive-asset ContentHearRponsiveAsset-bREgIb hONbnm"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz ccdiSo"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa ContentHearRponsiveAsset-bREgIb hONbnm rponsive-image"><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w, 960w" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w, 960w, 1280w, 1600w, 1920w, 2240w" siz="100vw"/><img alt="illtratn of circle of arms holdg penis" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></picture></div></div></span><div class="CaptnWrapper-jSZdqE dVZQpq ptn ContentHearLeadAssetCaptn-hPWmSN XczIg"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ CaptnCred-ejegDm iUEiRd cdsJgg fNaHcW ptn__cred">Illtratn by Simon Abranowicz</span></div></div></figure></div></div><asi class="PersistentAsiWrapper-VGrR oEIBz persistent-asi persistent-asi--align-left" style="posn:absolute;top:to;height:to" data-ttid="PersistentAsiWrapper"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jNgrSF sticky-box ContentHearPersistentAsi-fsnAmQ dFzKzm"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="SocialInsWrapper-hKMEXV ffgPVr social-ins social-ins--has-background ContentHearSocialIns-jzJiyg ctaZl social-ins--share"><ul data-ttid="socialInslist" class="SocialInsList-cHVTIA ivmblD social-ins__list"></ul></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></asi></hear></div><div data-attribute-verso-pattern="article-body" class="ArticlePageContentBackGround-cNiFNN kJkLmH article-body__ntent"><div class="ArticlePageChunksContent-etcMtP eRxRjL"><div data-ttid="ArticlePageChunks" class="ArticlePageChunks-fLyCVG eOdfIs"><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa edvONh body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p><strong>When Brandon* was his early 20s</strong> and studyg abroad, he went on a trip to Israel wh his iends to hike the Juan v. At a certa pot, they reached a part of the ve that was pch-black. “It didn't take long for someone to suggt we all jerk off the darkns,” Brandon, now 35, says. “And so we did.” After they fished, they zipped themselv up and proceed to ntue meanrg through the v, as if nothg happened. They never spoke of aga.</p><p>Brandon self-intifi as straight. He had never masturbated ont of another man, let alone a group of other men, before his life. Yet he says retrospect, the weirst thg about the cint was how not-weird seemed at the time. “It was tame, atty, kd of lame,” he said.</p><p>In tth, Brandon is absolutely right: his experience masturbatg ont of other men is far om a sgular one. Though there isn’t much data atttg to s exact prevalence, ’s far om unmon for straight men to have had munal masturbatory experienc durg adolcence, whether ’s beneath the alpa blankets their parents’ basement or behd the bleachers after gym class or the bunks at sleepaway mp (or <a href=">at John Lennon’s hoe</a>). There’s even a term for on Tumblr: “<a data-offer-url=" class="external-lk" data-event-click="{"element":"ExternalLk","outgogURL":"" href=" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">buddy batg</a>.”</p><div class="Contaer-bkChBi byNLHx"></div><p>“We know ’s mon for teenage boys to masturbate together or to stct one another how to do ,” says Dr. Jane Ward, thor of the 2015 <em>Not Gay: Sex Between Straight Whe Men</em>, which ed the viral term “bro jobs” to scribe straight men havg sex wh each other. Ward c a 1981 report on male sexualy by sexologist Shere He, which suggted that nearly 20 percent of men had engaged group masturbatn durg adolcence.</p><div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--article-mid-ntent" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--article-mid-ntent nsumer-marketg-un__slot---ntent"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></div><p>Most men who are willg to speak openly about experienc like this will do so wh a certa measure of fondns, even nostalgia. “It's a re of passage and an sential part of the teenage male bondg rual,” says Sean*, 31, who ed to buddy bate wh his iends when he was his early teens. Sean me of age the early ghts durg the pre-Pornhub, post-Limewire era, when onle porn was far ls accsible than is now, so he viewed munal masturbatn more as a matter of nvenience and ls as a display of buddg masculy. But regardls of the impet behd buddy batg, for some men, the urge to whip out ont of your bros extends beyond adolcence, even though there are fewer optns for them to dabble that tert adulthood.</p><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad---ntent"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot---ntent" data-no-id="1gl9h"></div></div><p>In Seattle, for stance, there’s the Ra Cy Jacks, a jackoff club for men who wish to, per the webse, “jack off openly and safely a uniquely sex-posive, non-discrimatg and mutually rpectful muny.” (They also have Mardi Gras-themed events, if you’re to that.) Every Sunday and Tuday, the Ra Cy Jacks meet at an erotic art gallery Seattle. The furnure is vered nvas, and volunteers hand out small plastic cups of lube to guts. (“We try to be environmentally rponsible, but people want their own clean lube,” Ra Cy Jacks founr and anizer Pl Rosenberg told me.) The lights are dimmed slightly and soft mic plays while the men gather, eher alone or small clters, and proceed to jerk off, all the while keepg nversatn to a mimum to ensure everyone stays the moment.</p><asi aria-hidn="te" class="PullQuoteEmbedWrapper-sc-EoVjf fQbAzo"><div class="PullQuoteDerativeBorr-sc-iUyOLj fAzNVP"></div><div class="PullQuoteEmbedContent-sc-kTcfhx eltaVW"><p>One of the terms I hear a lot is that this is the ultimate form of male bondg.</p></div></asi><p>Most of the atten at Ra Cy Jacks are gay men. But Rosenberg says is not unmon to see cur straight men at the club’s events. He nducts annual surveys of the group, and he says that while the majory of members are gay, about 10 percent of the Seattle Jacks’ 300 or so members self-intify as heterosexual, wh 25 percent intifyg as bisexual.</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB kNleGZ sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="Contaer-bkChBi byNLHx"></div><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="qh2hu"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="sl3l6f"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa edvONh body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p>“You n sometim tell a guy is straight bee he’s not terted kissg another guy,” says Rosenberg. “It’s easy for him to foc on the penis, but not to be physilly affectnate.” Nohels, he says, they all get somethg out of . “The straight men I’ve played wh at my club want to evangelize to other straight guys, bee they enjoy so much and they don’t feel threatened by ,” Rosenberg said. “They may feel no romantic attractn to other men, but we’ve given them a green light to experiment: to touch another man’s penis, to share pleasure wh each other. One of the terms I hear a lot is that this is the ultimate form of male bondg.”</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-1 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p>Cocintally, the 10 percent figure Rosenberg reports also squar wh data om BateWorld, a webse featurg men uploadg jackoff clips that has been <a href=">referred to as “Facebook for masturbators.”</a> Acrdg to a Slate piece on the phenomenon, approximately 10 percent of BateWorld’s ers self-intify as straight, while 5 percent refed to self-intify eher way—a number that pal parison to the more than 44,000 gay ers of the se (50 percent of s dience; 30 percent intifi as bi, while 5 percent would “rather not say”), but is nohels signifint. As Slate wrer Kyle Mta put , “that’s a lot of not-gay dus wh profil on a webse for men who like to masturbate wh other men.” And given the strict and arguably regrsive s erng male sexualy, which dictate that any man who so much as looks at another man has to be, if not gay, probably bisexual, ’s surprisg that so many ostensibly straight men are terted watchg other guys touch themselv.</p><p>That said, for some straight guys who attend jackoff clubs, lookg at or touchg other penis may almost be bi the pot. Ward, the thor of <em>Not Gay,</em> says that some men wh exhibnistic tennci jerk off ont of other men as a way to get validatn—say, a pliment about the size of their genals—that they may not necsarily get om their female partners. She said one man said he equently attend jackoff clubs bee he wanted to masturbate ont of his female partner, but she had no tert watchg him do so. To this man, jackoff clubs weren’t “much different than guys poppg the hood and parg eng. He said this was somethg he had a strong sire to share wh other men.”</p><p>Acrdg to Dr. Gloria Brame, a sexologist, the psychology mak sense. "People always feel stronger a group. Dog wh a bunch of other guys may give a shy man permissn to be his own wild self and enjoy the pleasure of masturbatn," she says. Alternatively, a masturbatn club uld offer a prsure-ee opportuny to get off whout the assistance of a partner. "For men who fd easier to e by hand rather than through peratn, n be very eeg to be a crowd wh others who may be the same place," says Dr. Brame, also notg the add thrill of exhibnism the settg provis.</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="h9j37"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="RecircMostPopularWrapper-bRuGTi jkTTgR recirc-most-popular-wrapper viewport-monor-anchor"><div class="RecircMostPopularConter-jiViNn ktrplG recirc-most-popular-sparrow-trackg hi-asi-ad" data-most-popular-id="mod-most-popular-1"><div class="RecircMostPopularHeadg-iVzhzt cKAPsp">Most Popular</div><ul class="RecircMostPopularItems-dCAajf gqcRrp"><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff iTWsZ summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--GALLERY summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-33-66 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw gjFFSE" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-1" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz jgsWEn"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Every Piece of Menswear You Should Own 2023" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fFPekr summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-1" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ ejPNRQ summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">Every Piece of Menswear You Should Own 2023</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY jbnRem summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH bfGBQB byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd dlWgVJ gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Gerald Ortiz</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff iTWsZ summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--GALLERY summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si 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siz="100vw"/><img alt="The Bt Menswear Deals of the Week" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fFPekr summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ ejPNRQ summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">The Bt Menswear Deals of the Week</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY jbnRem summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH bfGBQB byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd dlWgVJ gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>The Edors of GQ</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff iTWsZ summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--GALLERY summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-33-66 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw gjFFSE" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz jgsWEn"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="69 Excellent Gift Ias to Spoil All the Dervg Guys Out There" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fFPekr summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ ejPNRQ summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">69 Excellent Gift Ias to Spoil All the Dervg Guys Out There</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY jbnRem summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH bfGBQB byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd dlWgVJ gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Lori Keong</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw dacLSS ad ad--asi"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--asi" data-no-id="9ftvmg"></div></div></li></ul><div class="RecircMostPopularFooter-enPjgs joBAUg"></div></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="qs7xhm"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa edvONh body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p>On s surface, the ia that a man might masturbate ont of other men as an assertn of heterosexualy might sound strange. But tth, Ward pots out, there’s not much of a distctn between the munal experience of a jackoff club and, say, gog to a strip club and gettg a lap dance at the same time as your iend, or havg sex the same room as your male roommate durg llege. Y, prumably there are women prent those scenars, but the rult— munal aroal—is the same. While both of the experienc are not unmon for men their teens and twenti, they’re stnchly homoerotic nohels—and ’s also worth notg that there isn’t que an equivalent for young women. “The norms of llective aroal for men are very different than they are for women,” Ward says. “It’s jt mon for men’s sexualy to exprs self a public way.”</p><p>For this reason, says Ward, jackoff clubs “may be a way [for straight men] to perhaps relive or rennect wh a kd of adolcent homosocialy that men may have experienced.” In other words, much like gog to a strip club, ’s a form of male bondg, albe one that requir some heavy-duty cleanup afterwards. (Dawn, apparently, is the product of choice.)</p><hr/><p><strong>Whether ancient Juan v or erotic art galleri,</strong> men have prumably been gatherg for the exprs purpose of group masturbatn for lennia (see: <a href=">ancient Middle Eastern pagans</a> gatherg a field to J.O. as part of a fertily re, or pretty much any <a href="(M.A.N._1999-99-65)">vase signed</a> ancient Greece). Yet formal jackoff clubs have been around sce approximately the early 1980s, when the first known club, the New York Jacks, was found, says Steve*, the 69-year-old current anizer of the NY Jacks. At first, the members were primarily openly gay men, mostly exhibnists who “like public sex, but didn’t want to get volved more hardre stuff,” says Steve. But that changed a b when the HIV/AIDS crisis h the early 1980s. Bee the New York Jacks exclively foced on solo and mutual masturbatn, was viewed by many the gay muny as a relatively risk-ee alternative to bathho and sex clubs, which led to membership creasg. “What we do is pretty much as safe as you n get a public sex suatn,” Steve says.</p><p>Wh the advent of subredds like r/jobuds and porn webs like BateWorld, jackoff clubs have sce been somewhat on the cle. Yet for some, exchangg late-night snaps wh other dus on the ter don’t que have the same appeal as IRL group masturbatn. There are still a number of jackoff clubs across the untry, which are creasgly attractg young, straight men. Steve says he gets “lls and letters all the time” om straight men terted the club, who view as a safe space to exercise their cursy (if not their sire) about other men’s bodi. “Usually, I tell them ’s a perfect place for them bee you don’t have to get romantilly volved, you don’t have to touch anyone if you don’t want to,” he says. “You n jt e and watch or participate at whatever your fort level is.”</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="a5uymc"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div><div 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data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-1" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz jgsWEn"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Every Piece of Menswear You Should Own 2023" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fFPekr summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-1" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ ejPNRQ summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">Every Piece of Menswear You Should Own 2023</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY jbnRem summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH bfGBQB byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd dlWgVJ gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Gerald Ortiz</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff iTWsZ summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--GALLERY summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-33-66 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw gjFFSE" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz jgsWEn"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="The Bt Menswear Deals of the Week" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fFPekr summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ ejPNRQ summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">The Bt Menswear Deals of the Week</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY jbnRem summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH bfGBQB byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd dlWgVJ gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>The Edors of GQ</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff iTWsZ summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--GALLERY summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-33-66 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw gjFFSE" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz jgsWEn"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="" siz="100vw"/><img alt="69 Excellent Gift Ias to Spoil All the Dervg Guys Out There" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent summary-em__ntent--no-bric"><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM fFPekr summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ ejPNRQ summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">69 Excellent Gift Ias to Spoil All the Dervg Guys Out There</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY jbnRem summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH bfGBQB byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd dlWgVJ gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Lori Keong</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw dacLSS ad ad--asi"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--asi" data-no-id="5dfbvc"></div></div></li></ul><div class="RecircMostPopularFooter-enPjgs joBAUg"></div></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="digszr"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa edvONh body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p>Bee masturbatn (whether solo or mutual) is often not culturally viewed as a form of sex, guys who are cur about sex wh other men n dabble whout feelg like they’ve gone “all the way.” That’s particularly te if they are married or a relatnship wh someone who don’t know about their participatn jackoff clubs, says Rosenberg. For both gay and straight men relatnships, jackoff clubs “n be viewed as a way to jtify fily, bee don’t ‘unt’ as cheatg,” he says.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-2 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p>In recent years, jackoff clubs have tered to an creasgly diverse, younger, and more sexually open clientele. “The younger the guys are, the more open they are,” says Steve. “The younger generatn is so fortable wh gay people. They’ll play wh another guy even though they prefer women.”</p><p>To a gree, this rise tert among straight men parallels that of straight men same-sex activy general. Overall, more men are self-intifyg as bisexual or bicur than ever before: one 2018 YouGov <a href=">survey</a> suggts that 25 percent of people intify as somethg other than heterosexual, up 5 percent sce 2015. Men particular are also creasgly intifyg as bisexual, wh one 2016 Centers for Disease Control (CDC) study ditg that 2 percent of men (up om 1.4 percent of men 2010) self-intified as bi.</p><p>The last few years have seen somethg of a shift terms of male sexual fluidy beg more culturally acceptable, as the ia that everyone's sexualy exists on a spectm <a href=">has gaed tractn</a>. Male celebri like <a href=">Ni Tortorella</a> and Brendon Urie have e out as pansexual, and shows like <a data-offer-url=" class="external-lk" data-event-click="{"element":"ExternalLk","outgogURL":"" href=" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank"><em>Sense8</em></a> and <a href="><em>Scht’s Creek</em></a> feature male characters who are unapologetilly attracted to people of all genrs. But this shift has been margal at bt: there is still much more mastream cultural reprentatn of bisexual or pansexual women than men, part bee female sexualy is still nsired herently more fluid (spe a growg <a data-offer-url=" class="external-lk" data-event-click="{"element":"ExternalLk","outgogURL":"" href=" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">body of rearch</a> ditg otherwise). While men tend to <a data-offer-url=" class="external-lk" data-event-click="{"element":"ExternalLk","outgogURL":"" href=" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">ignore</a> or even actively enurage their female partners’ same-sex tennci, that’s not the se for women: fact, one 2016 <a href=">survey</a> om <em>Glamour</em> Magaze found that nearly two-thirds of women would not date a man who had sex wh other men.</p><p>As a rult of the lgerg stigma surroundg guy-on-guy actn, many straight men are reluctant to openly discs same-sex experienc or sire of any kd. (It’s worth notg, for stance, that while I spoke to more than a dozen self-intified straight men for this piece about their own experienc wh other men, they all only agreed to speak on the ndn of anonymy.)</p><asi aria-hidn="te" class="PullQuoteEmbedWrapper-sc-EoVjf fQbAzo"><div class="PullQuoteDerativeBorr-sc-iUyOLj fAzNVP"></div><div class="PullQuoteEmbedContent-sc-kTcfhx eltaVW"><p>We have so much homophobia, so straight men feel cut off om experiencg physil affectn wh other men.</p></div></asi><p>On ocsn, such ternalized homophobia n e issu jackoff clubs, pecially if a member approach another man who’s not terted anythg beyond lookg. “There’s never been anythg particularly vlent, but there n be awkward moments between guys,” says Steve. “They’re few and far between, but happens.”</p><p>It’s perhaps for this reason longtime jackoff club vote like Rosenberg view the clubs as an pe om toxic masculy, a way for men to enact their most taboo sir and self-love whout fear of judgment. “We have so much homophobia, so straight men feel cut off om experiencg physil affectn wh other men,” Rosenberg says. “In my view, experiencg affectn and nnectg wh other people physilly is part of what we need to achieve happs wh another human beg.” And while some might argue that a group of dus masturbatg on drop cloth-vered furnure don’t exactly nstute an emotnal nnectn, takg an act that is as solary and timate and so tradnally lan wh shame as masturbatn and makg munal n be transformative.</p><p>“What happens those circl is so affirmg and so healg and so transformg for the guys,” says Jallen Rix, a sex therapist and longtime attene of jackoff clubs, who hosts small Men’s Sacred Self-Pleasurg Circl his livg room southern California. As an example, he ced one man who had attend a circle Tennsee who said that he had been sexually abed as a child, and had th veloped a eply graed fear of olr men. “The circle had every shape and size, big, small, round, th, hairy, smooth,” Rix said. “Somehow that circle, his triggers went away. He uld see they were acceptg of him, and not out to get them.”</p><p>Or alternatively, perhaps the appeal is as simple as this: “most men, regardls of sexual orientatn, really love their penis,” says Steve. “And they love to masturbate.” So why not have all?</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-3 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p>*<em>Some nam have been changed to protect subjects' privacy.</em></p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="gyvw1k"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div 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