Dear Pnce: My dghter may be gay, but I hope not.

my 10 year old daughter thinks she is gay

Gay kids are g out earlier — sometim middle school — and many are fdg acceptance. But some parents and teachers wonr if the kids are too young to really know their sexual orientatn.

Contents:

WHAT TO DO WHEN YOUR CHILD SAYS: "I'M GAY"

How to talk to your 9 year old dghter who thks she is gay * my 10 year old daughter thinks she is gay *

When parents learn that their child is gay, lbian, bisexual, or transgenr, they n experience a range of emotns. As a matter of fact, you might someday look back and fd that you are grateful for the experience of havg a gay or lbian child.

Well, my study of 65 fai of gay and lbian youth for the book, Comg Out, Comg Home: Helpg Fai Adjt to a Gay or Lbian Child, I found that some parents get to the pot where they believe that the experience of havg a gay child actually ma them a better person—more open-md and sensive to the needs of others, particularly those other mory groups.

If you jt found out your child is gay, lbian, bisexual, or transgenr, you may be thkg that such ias are prepostero. The tstworthy nfidants let them vent but also rrected some of the misperceptns they absorbed om society, such as that gay people are lonely, unhappy, promiscuo, not fay-oriented, unable to have children, or sted for an unhappy life.

HOW TO TALK TO YOUR CHILD WHO IS QUTNG OR INTIFI AS LBIAN, GAY, BISEXUAL, TRANSGENR, QUEER OR ASEXUAL (LGBTQA)

She jt told me she’s gay. I’ve already talked to her about sex wh boys—how do I talk to her about girls? * my 10 year old daughter thinks she is gay *

Contact Parents, Fay, and Friends of Lbians and Gays (PFLAG). List of Helpful Books for Parents of Gay and Lbian Children.

Straight Parents Gay Children: Keepg Fai Together (revised edn).

YOUR 9-YEAR-OLD THKS SHE'S GAY

When a child first out as eher beg gay or havg same-sex attractn their parents' ial rpons are ually the wrong on, says Chris Doyle, a psychotherapist who specializ SSA. * my 10 year old daughter thinks she is gay *

Beyond Acceptance: Parents of Lbians, and Gays Talk About Their Experienc.

Somethg to Tell You: The Road Fai Travel when a Child is Gay. Comg Out, Comg Home: Helpg Fai Adjt to a Gay or Lbian Child.

WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOUR DGHTER TELLS YOU SHE’S GAY

* my 10 year old daughter thinks she is gay *

Fortunate Fai: Catholic fai wh lbian dghters and gay sons. Mom, Dad, I'm Gay: How Fai Negotiate Comg Out. Often, the nversatns start after a kid has met someone who intifi as lbian, gay, bisexual, transgenr, queer or asexual (LGBTQA).

Exampl: lbian, gay, bisexual, queer, asexual, pansexual, and Inty: The genr a person feels they are si. MorePart 1: Talkg to Your Child About What It Means to Intify as Lbian, Gay, Bisexual or Transgenr (LGBT). Your 9-year-old thks she is gay.

HOW CHRISTIAN PARENTS SHOULD RPOND TO THEIR CHILD'S GAY INTY CRISIS

— Dodie HofstetterExpert advice"A lot more parents are gog to hear this as we see more openly gay upl our culture and kids meet more fai wh gay parents, " says psychologist Anne Dohrenwend, thor of "Comg Around: Parentg Lbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgenr Kids" (New Horizon Prs). "It's possible a 9-year-old girl is simply feelg unfortable around boys and experiencg genue affectn toward her girliends and ncludg, "I'm gay. " Especially if she knows neighbors, fay iends or relativ who are gay, says may or may not be.

"Some people who turn out to be gay say they knew that young. Other people don't know their sexualy until much, much later — gay or straight. "What do you thk means to be gay?

GAY KIDS COMG OUT YOUNGER, BUT PARENTS ASK "HOW DO YOU KNOW?"

I don’t thk I’m gay, but I’m not sure if I’m straight. But growg up the mid-’80s suburbs of Dallas, and then San Diego, I also didn’t have a template for such didn’t talk about beg gay my fay, but then, we also didn’t talk about beg straight. This was the Reagan ‘80s: Beg gay wasn’t somethg one felt fortable openly aspirg to, but my hoe at least, wasn’t somethg to be reviled or feared, eher.

I’d never met a gay person, that I knew of anyway, except my mother’s hairdrser (everyone’s hairdrser the ‘80s was gay, right?

Gay inty for me was a plete unknown, sort of like the ast of Italy, the magic and mystery of which I would not disver until years later when I had a took years to adm I didn’t want to be a cheerlear, I wanted to be wh a I started to velop feelgs for girls — well to my late teens — I had no language for what I was experiencg. ) Frhman year, I had a csh on a sophomore cheerlear, and tried out for the squad to be closer to her. Y, her iends intify as bi or pan or mi, some more tradnally gay — some even straight!

MANY PARENTS STGGLE TO ADJT AFTER LEARNG CHILD IS GAY, STUDY FDS

She jt told me she’s gay.

YOUR CHILD JT TOLD YOU HE'S GAY. NOW WHAT?

Sign up to get "Dear Therapist" your Therapist, As a parent, I firmly believe that is my duty to prepare my kids to be posive, healthy, and productive people both the world and personal when my 12-year-old dghter announced that she is gay, my md started spng.

When a child first out to their parents as eher beg gay or havg same-sex attractn, their ial rpons are ually the wrong on, says Chris Doyle, a psychotherapist who specializ York Cy gay pri para crowd this undated photo.

"Sce homosexualy is beg more wily accepted Amerin society, an creasg number of teens who experience SSA are intifyg as gay. They believe that if you experience same-sex attractns, then you're gay, " Doyle told the negative rpons parents have, acrdg to Doyle, are avoidg the issue by barrg their child om talkg about SSA or their gay inty; believg that 's a passg phase; or threateng to kick their olr teen or 20-somethg child out of the hoe.

*BEAR-MAGAZINE.COM* MY 10 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER THINKS SHE IS GAY

Gay Kids Comg Out Younger, But Parents Ask "How Do You Know?" .

TOP