Tell: An Intimate History of Gay Men the Milary | GQ

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As "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" to an end, we sent Chris Heath to terview dozens of gay servicemen om the past and prent to fd out what life was really like as Ameri's ary stggled wh s last great inty crisis

Contents:

I THOUGHT I COULD SERVE AS AN OPENLY GAY MAN THE ARMY. THEN CAME THE DEATH THREATS.

Straight men who have engaged suatnal homosexualy (such as prison or the ary), what's your story? In rponse, and apparently to monstrate his petency his assigned posn, the nonmissned officer had taken upon himself to approach the person he nsired cled toward mtg a siar offense the future: me, the only openly gay soldier my un. Together we approached our un’s learship, where she sisted that the ments had stemmed om the reprentative’s own homophobic feelgs and remend that he be reprimand and removed om his posn as the un’s sexual harassment watchdog.

But by then was hard to ignore the anxiety I felt durg required social activi — “mandatory fun, ” as ’s lled the ary — or the tensn om my fellow moment I cid to bee a soldier and the moment I chose to live openly as a gay man occurred so closely time that ’s hard to remember which me first.

It was still four months before the repeal of “don’t ask, don’t tell, ” a double-edged policy prohibg askg any service member about his or her sexualy while enforcg a ban on openly gay service members. As long as gay soldiers kept their mouths shut, the burn of proof fell on those makg the accatns. A uple were more elaborate: tailed scriptns of what might happen to me if I was ught alone, and proclamatns about the wrongns of gays the ary.

WHAT STRAIGHT SOLDIERS DO : MILARY AND GAYS: THE SEXUAL MISNDUCT OF SERVICEMEN STATNED OVERSEAS IS LEGENDARY; SHOULD BE ‘DISHONORABLE.’

There are moments when feels wrong to claim my stat as a veteran; as if beg gay ma me ls of a soldier and somehow validated my service.

Every memory evok an emotn: rage that I had to serve wh a nstant sense of fear of my fellow soldiers; paralyzg sadns for those who endured ab worse than I n know; and, the worst, guilt over the service members — gay or straight or transgenr — who died while servg the ary while my body is still whole.

Many straight, gay and bisexual men have said that the shared showers, latr and changg areas; the pent-up horns and need for sexual exprsn all make the ary a place that awakens same-sex sire.

TELL: AN INTIMATE HISTORY OF GAY MEN THE MILARY

Th, homoerotic iatn ruals allow servicemembers to flict the ab they’ve endured and also tt new members’ willgns to subm to tradn and group-thk whout succumbg to emotn or “stctive” homosexual sir. Jane Ward, thor of Not Gay: Sex between Straight Whe Men, says that the thkg surroundg the ruals is, “If you endure together this kd of mortifyg, huiatg and embarrassg homosexual act, then that not only toughens up your body, but will also build and strengthen that bond around you.

*BEAR-MAGAZINE.COM* MILITARY GAY STRAIGHT

What Straight Soldiers Do : Milary and gays: The sexual misnduct of servicemen statned overseas is legendary; should be 'dishonorable.' - Los Angel Tim .

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