9 Ways to Reach Out to a Gay-Intified Friend - Foc on the Fay

Contents:

• SHOULD A CHRISTIAN HAVE GAY IENDS?
• HOW SHOULD CHRISTIANS RPOND TO GAY FRIENDS OR FAY MEMBERS?
• HOW SHOULD CHRISTIANS RELATE TO GAY FRIENDS, NEIGHBORS, AND FAY?
• SHOULD I ATTEND THE WEDDG OF A GAY FRIEND OR FAY MEMBER?
• 9 WAYS TO REACH OUT TO A GAY-INTIFIED FRIEND
• I'M GAY, BUT I'M NOT SWCHG TO A CHURCH THAT SUPPORTS GAY MARRIAGE
• WNSG TO A GAY FRIEND
• ARE THERE REALLY “GAY CHRISTIANS”?
• HOW TO RENCILE YOUR CHRISTIAN FAH WH YOUR GAY LIFE
• CAN CHRISTIANS BE GAY?

SHOULD A CHRISTIAN HAVE GAY IENDS?

In nsirg whether a Christian should have gay iends, we need to ask ourselv whether J would have gay iends. We learn om the gentle way He alt wh sful people that He would have offered homosexuals the same passn and opportuny to “go and s no more” (John 8:11). If possible, J would have clud homosexuals when He ate at the hom of “notor sners” (Le 15:1, NLT).

From a biblil perspective, many nfed people are trapped the s of homosexualy and need to be livered. Followg Christ’s example, we n extend iendship to gay people, monstrate His love for them, pray for them, and celebrate as much mon ground as we n fd.

In our teractns wh gay iends, we mt be reful not to give the imprsn that we are validatg their s. A Christian is simply a sner who has accepted the gospel and now reprents Christ to everyone, cludg our gay iends, wh grace and tth (John 1:14). That’s bee Kaltenbach has an sir perspective, havg been raised by a dad and mom who divorced and penntly me out of the closet as a gay man and a lbian.

HOW SHOULD CHRISTIANS RPOND TO GAY FRIENDS OR FAY MEMBERS?

Today, he manag the tensn of holdg to the tradnal biblil teachg on sexualy while lovg his gay parents. Kaltenbach’s unique story is tailed his new book Msy Grace: How a Pastor wh Gay Parents Learned to Love Others Whout Sacrificg Convictn and land him on the ont page of the New York Tim June. If someone who is LGBT says that ’s not maly about sex, why immediately throw the “homosexualy vers” their way?

Many examed Scripture, believe that sexual timacy is for a man and woman marriage, and aren’t homophobic or hateful. However, all passag alg wh homosexualy agree that same-sex timacy isn’t God’s sign — monogamo or not.

HOW SHOULD CHRISTIANS RELATE TO GAY FRIENDS, NEIGHBORS, AND FAY?

’07) is the lead pastor at Disvery Church Simi Valley, Calif., and the thor of Msy Grace: How a Pastor wh Gay Parents Learned to Love Others Whout Sacrificg Convictn.

When I speak at stunt events, Christian kids ask me, “How should I relate to my gay iends? Jt like the kids who approached me at a church event, Christian adults also wonr, “How should I relate to my gay iends or -workers?

SHOULD I ATTEND THE WEDDG OF A GAY FRIEND OR FAY MEMBER?

” Parents have asked me, “Will I promise my stance on biblil sexualy by beg kd to my gay child’s partner? That don’t mean we approve of every life choice somebody mak… Parents of [gay] teenagers who “e out” to them sometim thk, “If I accept my child, that means that I’m approvg of a same-sex relatnship.

9 WAYS TO REACH OUT TO A GAY-INTIFIED FRIEND

I was makg a prentatn and a lol gay activist ntacted our universy and said “I’m gog [to be there]. ” Then, he did a YouTube vio llg for all of his gay, lbian, bisexual, transgenr and other iends to e and jt s the ont uple rows and stare me down… so I ved them to e.

” And… he was jt eviscerated by people wh the gay muny who felt like he should’ve been tougher on me….

I'M GAY, BUT I'M NOT SWCHG TO A CHURCH THAT SUPPORTS GAY MARRIAGE

Intertgly, the prottor got more ph-back om the gay muny than he did om Christians who extend a hand to him. Book: Caleb Kaltenbach, Msy Grace: How a Pastor wh Gay Parents Learned to Love Others Whout Sacrificg Convictn.

To Christians who have gay iends, how long is before you get to the "you are sng" nversatn? Jt some background but I'm askg this as a gay man who has Christian iends who I'm still the closet wh. Based on this reasong, then, we might nclu that Christians should have no problem attendg a gay weddg, even if they do not agree wh .

For eight years, his blog, An Exercise the Fundamentals of Orthodoxy, chronicled his journey out of homosexualy. I thk of my baptism when I nsir how Christians should rpond when they are ved to gay weddgs. A cisn not to attend a same-sex weddg tak place the same universe as gay-bashg, bullyg, and the long grd of ntempt toward gay men and women.

WNSG TO A GAY FRIEND

I nnot good nscience attend a same-sex weddg precisely bee I love my gay iends and want their bt.

Though some gay married upl may be exemplary love and votn, SSM has more omo aspects. Nonal sex (straight or gay), rather like premaral sex, seeks the experience of njugal unn whout s full realy. Many of know someone who intifi as gay, lbian or bisexual, whether a -worker, neighbor, or iend.

ARE THERE REALLY “GAY CHRISTIANS”?

Rather than seeg your iend as a homosexual, thk of him or her as a person who stggl wh sexual brokenns/sexual wholens. Many of those volved homosexualy have been wound by well-meang but ignorant Christians.

Image attendg a gay pri para and hearg sults shouted by church people standg on the sil. However they label themselv, view your iend as a man or woman ma the image of God, not as a “homosexual” or a “project.

HOW TO RENCILE YOUR CHRISTIAN FAH WH YOUR GAY LIFE

Women or men ught homosexualy nnot change on their own; they need the power of J Christ workg their liv before the change will occur. You don’t have to bee an expert on all aspects of homosexualy before you n be a godly fluence on your gay loved one. Certaly men n help lbian-intified women, and women n help gay-intified men to leave homosexualy and follow Christ.

Much of this will e through healthy same-sex mentors, unselors, enuragers and Ana Worthen and Bob Davi, Someone I Love Is Gay, ( Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsy Prs, 1996), ch. There are thoands of men and women — who ed to intify as gay — who now bear ttimony to the power of prayer and a lovg wns for Christ their liv. Jeff Johnston works as an Issu Analyst for Foc on the Fay, wrg and teachg about marriage, homosexualy and genr, as well as enuragg and equippg Christians to engage the culture on the issu.

CAN CHRISTIANS BE GAY?

When I beme Catholic 1998, as a llege sophomore, I didn't know any other gay Christians. I'd been raised a kd of potillist Reform Judaism, almost entirely protected om homophobia; when I realized I was gay was, if anythg, a relief. This sheltered upbrgg may help expla my sunny unrgraduate nfince that even though I knew of lerally nobody else who had ever tried to be both unashamedly gay and obediently Catholic, I was totally gog to do .

I hope I've learned a few thgs about the dangers of sophomoric self-nfince: There are tim when my relatnship wh the Catholic Church feels a lot like Margaret Atwood's feroc ltle poem, You f to me like a hook to an eyea fish hook an open eyeAnd I've met many other gay or queer or same-sex-attracted Christians, all flavors of Christiany. We disagree (sometim sharply) among ourselv on the bt rponse to the growg cultural acceptance and polil succs of gay marriage; but before polics and even before culture, our rponse mt be personal.

A special report on how the stutn is changg Read more As Liza Mundy's article "The Gay Gui to Wedd Bliss" showed the terview wh Pastor Delman Coat of Mt.