Your Child Jt Told You He's Gay. Now What? | Psychology Today

Contents:

• WHAT TO DO WHEN YOUR CHILD SAYS: "I'M GAY"
• THIS IS HOW I REALLY REACTED WHEN MY SON TOLD ME HE WAS GAY
• THIS IS HOW I FELT WHEN MY SON TOLD ME HE WAS GAY
• YOUR CHILD JT TOLD YOU HE'S GAY. NOW WHAT?
• OUR SEVEN-YEAR-OLD SON TOLD HE WAS GAY
• MY SON THKS HE’S GAY
• I NNOT AL WH FACT MY SON IS GAY
• MY SON MIGHT BE GAY. WHAT SHOULD I SAY TO HIM?
• HOW TO TELL IF YOUR SON IS GAY
• IS MY SON GAY OR IS A PHASE?
• IS MY SON GAY?
• MY SON IS GAY
• HOW DO I DISCS BEG GAY WH MY 8-YEAR-OLD?

WHAT TO DO WHEN YOUR CHILD SAYS: "I'M GAY"

When parents learn that their child is gay, lbian, bisexual, or transgenr, they n experience a range of emotns. As a matter of fact, you might someday look back and fd that you are grateful for the experience of havg a gay or lbian child.

THIS IS HOW I REALLY REACTED WHEN MY SON TOLD ME HE WAS GAY

Well, my study of 65 fai of gay and lbian youth for the book, Comg Out, Comg Home: Helpg Fai Adjt to a Gay or Lbian Child, I found that some parents get to the pot where they believe that the experience of havg a gay child actually ma them a better person—more open-md and sensive to the needs of others, particularly those other mory groups.

If you jt found out your child is gay, lbian, bisexual, or transgenr, you may be thkg that such ias are prepostero. The tstworthy nfidants let them vent but also rrected some of the misperceptns they absorbed om society, such as that gay people are lonely, unhappy, promiscuo, not fay-oriented, unable to have children, or sted for an unhappy life. Contact Parents, Fay, and Friends of Lbians and Gays (PFLAG).

List of Helpful Books for Parents of Gay and Lbian Children. Straight Parents Gay Children: Keepg Fai Together (revised edn). Beyond Acceptance: Parents of Lbians, and Gays Talk About Their Experienc.

THIS IS HOW I FELT WHEN MY SON TOLD ME HE WAS GAY

Somethg to Tell You: The Road Fai Travel when a Child is Gay. Comg Out, Comg Home: Helpg Fai Adjt to a Gay or Lbian Child. Fortunate Fai: Catholic fai wh lbian dghters and gay sons.

YOUR CHILD JT TOLD YOU HE'S GAY. NOW WHAT?

Mom, Dad, I'm Gay: How Fai Negotiate Comg Out. “I’m gay. I have had gay iends (and been eply hurt and disappoted when beme obv.

He never wanted to be gay.

OUR SEVEN-YEAR-OLD SON TOLD HE WAS GAY

To iends of me who may have gay children, or be gay themselv, please five me for my ignorance. I don’t know if I’ll ever be “okay” wh the gay liftyle, but right now, I am okay wh my son beg gay, and right now, that is all that matters.

What would you do if your child told you they were gay?

MY SON THKS HE’S GAY

If you’d like to jo the Fom, drop a le at do feel like to fd out that your son is gay? So my 19-year-old son told me he is gay last night.

He don’t “act gay, ” but ’s not a huge leap to image him beg still put me to shock. ”“Don’t get stuck on thkg about the mechanics of gay sex. Bee I’m obvly the person who is gog to have trouble unrstandg that he’s gay.

I NNOT AL WH FACT MY SON IS GAY

For straight parents, havg a child reveal that he is gay n be a jolt. You might ask how long he or she has known, and why he feels he is gay, bi, or trans, suggts Jonathan Tobk, M.

D., a psychiatrist private practice New York Cy and the -thor of When Your Child Is Gay: What You Need to Know. You n fd one through the Associatn of Gay and Lbian Psychiatrists. Take the extra step and show your child that you are terted beg the parent of a gay child.

MY SON MIGHT BE GAY. WHAT SHOULD I SAY TO HIM?

Edute yourself on what means to be gay, lbian, bisexual or transgenr. PFLAG, or Parents for Lbians and Gays, which now has a group for transgenr youth, and holds natnwi chapters and meetgs;. They immediately clocked as gay, while we immediately clocked them as we warmed up to another, one mom anxly said: "I have a qutn: I am pretty sure my son is gay, but I don't know what to do.

"For example, if someone the word "gay" place of "stupid, " remd them that the two are not terchangeable, and suggt they should say what they actually mean stead.

"The rourc n help:PFLAG: The untry’s largt anizatn ung parents, fai, and alli wh people who are lbian, gay, bisexual, transgenr, and Spectm: Offers groups, trag, and rourc promotg genr sensivy and cln for all youthGLBT Natnal Rource Database: LGBTQ+ digal directory of rourcNatnal Queer and Trans Therapists of Color Network: Directory of therapists/unselors who are people of lorNatnal LGBTQ Task Force: The progrsive advocy arm of the LGBTQ+ movementDurg LGBTQ Pri Month, TODAY is sharg the muny’s history, pa, joy and what’s next for the movement. He took a be of chicken and announced, his matter-of-fact way, “I hope you know I’m gay.

HOW TO TELL IF YOUR SON IS GAY

In a flood of words, he told me he wanted to tell his iends that he was gay— felt like he was keepg a secret om them, and when he thought about too much, ma him feel heart ached, and I wished I uld rewd to the time when kiss and cuddl fixed absolutely everythg. ” to “Who are you gay wh? So when another stunt said somethg to him like, “Well, at least I’m not gay!

Rather than emphasizg whether or not to try to cut off his terchange — there is, after all, nothg wrong wh beg gay — a more important, longer-term qutn would be, “How n I help him improve his social skills? This strategy would hopefully provi a long-term solutn, whether or not he ntu to intify as gay.

Qutn: TWO months ago my son Gav, 29, announced that he is gay.

IS MY SON GAY OR IS A PHASE?

He me home one weekend to expla to me and my hband that he has been livg wh his partner for three months and has known he was gay sce he was 17. UPSET: Mary n't e to terms wh the fact that her son is gay / pic posed by molsI was vastated and me as a shock bee Gav has the past brought girliends home to meet . Mary, 57, SheffieldAnswer:DEBORAH SAYS:How do you e to terms wh the news your son is gay?

You have to let them parents fd hard to accept their child is gay.

IS MY SON GAY?

Perhaps is ls difficult than once was bee there is ls secrecy and ls opprobrium surroundg homosexualy but is still hard bee upsets all your expectatns about your mt have been very difficult for Gav to e home and tell you this. Of urse you wouldn’ you n’t “e to terms” wh homosexualy you n’t e to terms wh him.

Dave, I have a 17-year-old son, and I am fairly sure he is gay.

MY SON IS GAY

I psed on our lol PBS affiliate, where a huge choir was sgg, and after a few sends I realized was the Gay Men's Chos of some cy or another dog a fundraisg ncert.

At this time my life, I was 99 percent certa I was gay, though nowhere near ready to sprg on my parents. We had no gay people our liv back then, no way to gge my fay's level of tolerance.

HOW DO I DISCS BEG GAY WH MY 8-YEAR-OLD?

We had no gay people our liv back then, no way to gge my fay's level of watched as they livered a rendn of what I remember as "Somewhere Over the Rabow, " bee eher they or my memory are unfivably basic.

Stirrg and brave and subversive, g as did a time before marriage equaly was on the map, a time when you only saw gay people on the news. Good on you for not pot-blank askg your son whether he's gay.

It means one simple, pable thg: Once you have told your dad you're gay, there is no gog back.