Many parents stggle to adjt after learng child is gay, study fds

gay symptoms in children

The northern Italian cy of Padua has started removg the nam of non-blogil gay mothers om their children’s birth certifit unr new legislatn passed by the “tradnal fay-first” ernment of Prime Mister Grgia Meloni.

Contents:

IS YOUR CHILD GAY?

A Mnota school district is facg a Department of Jtice vtigatn and a private lawsu over s alleged failure to bat antigay bullyg.... * gay symptoms in children *

As I relayed When Your Child Is Gay: What You Need To Know (Sterlg, 2016), I found out that my son was gay om a note wh our son's name entwed wh another boy's, surround by a heart.

Both lbians and gay men often have a history of cross-sex-typed behavrs: ltle boys beg fatuated wh their mother's makp k; ltle girls enamored of field hockey or profsnal wrtlg. Prehomosexual boys tend to be more attracted to solary sports such as swimmg, cyclg and tennis than they are to rougher ntact sports such as football and soccer. It is only relatively recently, however, that velopmental scientists have nducted ntrolled studi to intify the earlit and most reliable signs of adult homosexualy.

So on the basis of some earlier, shakier rearch, along wh a good dose of mon sense, Bailey and Zucker hypothized that homosexuals would show an verted pattern of sex-typed childhood behavrs—ltle boys preferrg girls as playmat and beg fatuated wh their mother's makp k; ltle girls strangely enamored of field hockey or profsnal wrtlg—that sort of thg. Although only 12 percent of the women grew up to be genr dysphoric (the unfortable sense that your blogil sex do not match your genr), the odds of the women reportg a bisexual or homosexual orientatn were up to 23 tim higher than would occur a general sample of young women. Bailey and Zucker, who nducted a retrospective study which adults answered qutns about their past, revealed that 89 percent of randomly sampled gay men relled cross-sex-typed childhood behavrs exceedg the heterosexual median.

WHEN DO GAY KIDS START “ACTG GAY”?

If you thk your child is gay, there are thgs you n do to be supportive and helpful or thgs that aggravate a sensive suatn, says Mr. Gay India. * gay symptoms in children *

There is also evince of a “dosage effect”: the more genr-nonnformg characteristics there are childhood, the more likely is that a homosexual or bisexual orientatn will be prent adulthood.

WHAT TO DO IF YOU THK YOUR CHILD IS GAYBY ANWH SAHOO APR 20, 2017SHARE I’VE WRTEN BEFORE ABOUT HOW IMPORTANT IS FOR PARENTS TO REACT SENSIVELY WHEN KIDS E OUT. I WROTE OM THE ASSUMPTN THAT THE NEWS THE CHILD IS GAY WOULD E AS A SURPRISE, IF NOT A SHOCK, AS WAS FOR MY PARENTS. BUT SOME PARENTS MIGHT GUS A CHILD’S SEXUALY BEFORE THE CHILD KNOWS (OR IS FORTABLE EXPRSG) . WHAT DO YOU DO THEN?WELL, THE MOST IMPORTANT THG IS TO SHOW THAT YOUR LOVE AND UNRSTANDG IS UNNDNAL. BEYOND THAT, HERE ARE SOME TIPS.I THK MY CHILD IS GAY. WHAT DO I DO?FIRST, LET’S TALK ABOUT WHAT YOU DON’T DO.DON’T JUMP TO NCLNS IF YOU THK YOUR SON IS GAY OR DGHTER IS GAY.WHILE I LARGELY DID F TO THE STEREOTYPIL RITURE OF A GAY MAN, NOT EVERY GAY PERSON DO. STEREOTYP AREN’T NECSARILY WRONG, BUT THEY ARE PLETE; THERE ARE MANY WAYS OF BEG. GAY MIGHT BE EFFEMATE, OR GAY ULD BE STRONG, DAC, POWERFUL AND BETIFUL – JT LIKE STRAIGHT ULD BE ANY OF THOSE THGS. DON’T LET THE MOST MON REPRENTATN OF HOMOSEXUALY – OR HETEROSEXUALY — MAKE YOU JUMP TO NCLNS ABOUT THE SEXUAL ORIENTATN OF YOUR CHILD. THERE ARE NO SYMPTOMS OF GAY THAT YOU N WATCH OUT FOR, BEE BEG GAY ISN’T A DISORR; KIDS WHO ARE GAY AND KIDS WHO ARE STRAIGHT E ALL SHAP, SIZ AND PERSONALI.DON’T SPECULATE ABOUT YOUR KID’S SEXUALY TO OTHERS. YOUR KID’S SEXUALY IS A SENSIVE TOPIC AND EXTREMELY PRIVATE FOR YOUR CHILD. EVEN IF HE (OR SHE) IS FORTABLE WH HIS SEXUALY, HE WOULDN’T NECSARILY WANT TO BE OUT TO YOUR IENDS AND NEIGHBOURS. GAY KIDS – AND KIDS PEOPLE THK ARE GAY, WHETHER THEY ARE OR NOT – FACE A LOT OF SENSIVE QUTNS AND MENTS, NOT TO MENTN BULLYG. THK: WOULD YOU LIKE PEOPLE WHISPERG ABOUT WHO YOU MAY OR MAY NOT BE ATTRACTED TO? LET KIDS CHOOSE WHOM THEY WISH TO E OUT TO.DON’T ASK.IT MIGHT SEEM LOGIL: HOW DO YOU KNOW IF YOUR CHILD IS GAY IF YOU DON’T ASK? BUT THAT’S NOT A GOOD MOVE. FIRST, THERE ARE A LN WAYS TO GO ABOUT MORE TACTFULLY (SEE BELOW). AND SEND, YOUR CHILD MAY NOT KNOW OR BE FULLY FORTABLE THEIR SEXUALY – SO THEY MIGHT NOT HAVE AN ANSWER, BUT STILL FEEL PRSURE TO GIVE ONE.WHEN I REALIZED I MIGHT BE GAY, AT AGE 16, I’D OFTEN VEHEMENTLY OPPOSE HOMOSEXUALY MY NVERSATNS OR BSH UNR THE RPET. THAT’S BEE I WAS REPEATG THE ATTUS I HAD BEEN NURTURED . (THE TERM ‘HOMOSEXUALY’ NEVER EXISTED MY VOBULARY TILL I WAS 13!) MOST OF HAVE LIVED OUR LIV A HETERO-NORMATIVE SOCIETY, SO MIGHT TAKE TIME FOR GAY KIDS TO E TO TERMS WH HOMOSEXUALY.WHICH BRGS ME TO THE DO’S:DO GIVE YOUR CHILD REASON TO BELIEVE YOU’D ACCEPT THEM IF/WHEN THEY E OUT TO YOU. RATHER THAN ASK IF YOUR SON IS GAY OR DGHTER IS GAY, OR WATCH FOR SIGNS YOUR CHILD IS GAY, WHAT YOU  N DO (AND WHAT MY PARENTS DID, UNKNOWGLY) IS MAKE YOUR KID BELIEVE THAT G OUT TO PARENTS WOULD BE OK.ONE WAY TO DO IS BY WATCHG GAY-IENDLY MEDIA, LIKE THE SATYAMEV JAYATE EPISO ABOUT SEXUALY, DURG OR AFTER WHICH YOU N MENTN HOW BRAVE YOU THK GAZAL WAS FOR G TO TERMS WH HER TRANS INTY AND HOW YOU APPRECIATE HER PARENTS’ EFFORTS TO STAND BY HER SI. SIARLY, YOU ULD WATCH FILMS LIKE SUMMER MY VES, PRAYERS FOR BOBBY, OR TOUCH OF PK WHICH ARE ABOUT CHILDREN G OUT TO PARENTS. (IF YOUR NEW TASTE FILM DON’T PROMPT YOUR CHILD TO NFI, DON’T EAK OUT; THE SUBTLE MSAGE OF ACCEPTANCE YOU’RE SENDG IS MORE IMPORTANT.)ANOTHER WAY TO DO THIS IS BY MDG WHAT YOU SAY. USE SENSIVE AND UP-TO-DATE TERMS WHENEVER YOU TALK ABOUT HOMOSEXUALY. (IF YOU NEED HELP, CHECK OUT MY LGBTIQ DICTNARY FOR PARENTS!) AND YET ANOTHER WAY IS TO EXPOSE YOUR CHILD OM THE START TO SPIRG STORI OF LGBTIQ INS LIKE HARVEY MILK, FREDDIE MERCURY, AND ELLEN DEGENER.THIS WILL ALL GO A LONG WAY TO NVEYG TO YOUR CHILD THAT, IF THEY’RE NOT GAY, THERE’S STILL MUCH TO EMULATE THE ROLE MOLS; AND IF YOUR CHILD IS GAY, THEY N E OUT TO YOU “BEE ’S OKAY,” AS DEGENER PUT A 1997 TERVIEW WH OPRAH. (HER WHOLE TERVIEW IS WORTH A WATCH.)DO WATCH YOUR TONE OF VOICE. GAY OR STRAIGHT, TEENS PICK UP ON HOW YOU SAY SOMETHG, FAR MORE THAN WHAT YOU SAY. TALK TO THEM ABOUT SEXUALY – GAY OR STRAIGHT — LIKE YOU’RE DISCSG WHAT THEY’D WANT TO HAVE FOR DNER, WHOUT AN OUNCE OF JUDGMENT, RISN OR EVEN AWKWARDNS. IF YOUR KID SEEMS DISTERTED, DON’T FORCE , BUT LET THEM BRG UP IF AND WHEN THEY’RE FORTABLE.DO ASK YOURSELF: WHY DO I WANT TO KNOW IF MY CHILD IS GAY? A LOT OF PARENTS DON’T EXACTLY EXPECT THEIR KIDS TO BE GAY, SO ADAPTG PERSONAL EXPECTATNS AND DREAMS MIGHT BE DIFFICULT – BUT YOU DON’T NEED YOUR CHILD’S NFIRMATN TO DO . IF YOU WANT TO ASK SO YOU N REASSURE YOUR CHILD OF YOUR ACCEPTANCE, THERE ARE BETTER WAYS TO DO (SEE ABOVE).IF YOU WANT TO KNOW WHETHER YOUR SON IS GAY OR DGHTER IS GAY BEE YOU’RE WORRIED THEY’RE HAVG SEX, YOU DON’T NEED TO KNOW WH WHAT GENR TO TALK TO THEM ABOUT SAFE SEXUAL PRACTIC AND HIV PREVENTN. IT’LL BE AWKWARD, BUT ’S IMPORTANT, SO GET OVER .IF YOU WANT TO KNOW BEE YOU’RE STGGLG TO ACCEPT THE POSSIBILY THAT YOUR SON IS GAY OR DGHTER IS GAY, NOW IS THE TIME TO NONT YOUR OWN PREJUDICE. IT MAY E AS A SURPRISE TO YOU; I’VE HEARD MANY OF MY CLASSMAT SAY, “OH, I SUPPORT HOMOSEXUALY, BUT MY KID BETTER NOT BE GAY!” IT DON’T REALLY WORK THAT WAY; YOU EHER DO ACCEPT HOMOSEXUALY, OR YOU DON’T. USE THIS OPPORTUNY TO ACTUALLY LIVE UP TO HOW YOU’VE ALWAYS THOUGHT OF YOURSELF.AND NSIR THIS: YOUR CHILD MAY WELL BE STGGLG AS MUCH OR MORE THAN YOU. ASKG ABOUT THEIR SEXUALY BEFORE THEY’RE READY IS MORE ABOUT WHAT YOU NEED, NOT ABOUT WHAT THEY NEED. THK OF A DIFFICULT MOMENT YOUR LIFE: DID YOU WELE OTHER PEOPLE’S QUTNS AT THAT TIME? DID YOU JT WANT TO FIGURE OUT YOURSELF AND MOVE ON?FALLY, WHETHER OR NOT YOU’RE 100% ACCEPTG, THE LAST TWO POTS ARE MOST IMPORTANT IF YOU THK YOUR CHILD IS GAY:DO MAKE SURE YOUR CHILD KNOWS THERE’S MORE TO LIFE THAN A PERSON’S SEXUALY. LET YOUR CHILD’S SEXUALY BE JT ONE PART OF WHO HE OR SHE IS. DO YOUR CHILD SEE YOU ONLY AS SOMEONE WHO IS ATTRACTED TO THE OPPOSE SEX? PROBABLY NOT. PROBABLY THEY SEE YOU AS A MOTHER OR FATHER, A SUCCSFUL PROFSNAL, A SUPPORTIVE IEND OR NEIGHBOUR, A GOOD CIZEN, BEE YOU ARE ALL THOSE THGS; GAY OR STRAIGHT, YOUR CHILD N BE ALL OF THOSE THGS AND MORE, TOO. DEFG KIDS BY WHOM THEY ARE ATTRACTED TO IS AS ARBRARY AND LIMG AS FG THEM BY THEIR SHOE SIZE. CELEBRATE ALL PARTS OF THEIR PERSONALY.DO TREAT THEM THE WAY YOU’VE ALWAYS TREATED THEM. YOUR CHILD DIDN’T JT TURN GAY OVERNIGHT. THEY WERE BORN THAT WAY. DEALG WH A GAY CHILD (OR ONE YOU THK MIGHT BE GAY) DON’T HAVE TO BE DIFFERENT OM ALG WH A STRAIGHT CHILD. WHY SHOULD YOUR SPECULATN – OR YOUR KNOWLEDGE, IF THEY’VE E OUT — CHANGE THE RELATNSHIP BETWEEN YOU?SHARE TAGS LGBTQIA+ | PRETEENS | SEXUALY | TEENS WRTEN BY ANWH SAHOO ANWH SAHOO IS A VORAC WRER, OPTIMIST AND A LOVER OF OLD-SCHOOL INDIAN ART, MIC AND FASHN. WHILE HE’S A FIRM BELIEVER PRACTILY, A PART OF HIM LOV LIVG A WORLD OF POSSIBILI. HE BLOGS AT THE EFFEMARE, A PARALLEL UNIVERSE WHERE HE GETS TO ILLTRATE THE UTOPIAN WORLD HE WANTS TO BE A PART OF. HE LOOKS AT LIFE AS A THRILLG MYSTERY NOVEL WRTEN BY GOD AND, SCE HIS NOVEL HAS ONLY STARTED, HE’D GO WH: ‘I AM STILL EVOLVG!’ SEE ALL ARTICL BY ANWHLATT SCIENCE ARTICL RISE OF THE CYBSFROM HEARG COLORS TO SEEG ULTRAVLET, IS ENHANCEMENT THE FUTURE OF HUMAN SENS?

Parents of gay children may go through an adjtment perd when they fd out their child is gay, but there is support for parents of gay children. * gay symptoms in children *

Cross-cultural data show that prehomosexual boys are more attracted to solary sports such as swimmg, cyclg and tennis than they are to rougher ntact sports such as football and soccer; they are also ls likely to be childhood bulli. Bee the data often reveal very early emergg tras prehomosexuals, children who show pronounced sex-atypil behavrs may have more of a geic loadg to their homosexualy, whereas gay adults who were sex-typil as children might trace their homosexualy more directly to particular childhood experienc.

Lang, Elton John and Rachel Maddow's close relativ, but I n only image that the straight k are far better off terms of their own reproductive opportuni than they would be whout a homosexual danglg so magnificently on their fay tre. So cultivate your ltle prehomosexual's native talents, and your ultimate geic payoff uld, strangely enough, be even larger wh one very special gay child than would be if 10 medcre straight offsprg leaped om your los. I n say as a once prehomosexual pipsqueak that some preparatn on the part of others would have ma easier on me, rather than nstantly fearg rejectn or worryg about some rels slipup leadg to my “exposure.

PARENTS OF GAY CHILDREN AND THE ISSU THEY FACE

* gay symptoms in children *

And another thg: mt be pretty hard to look to your prehomosexual toddler's limpid ey, bsh away the okie cmbs om her cheek and toss her out on the streets for beg article was origally published wh the tle "Is Your Child Gay?

WHEN YOUR CHILD IS GAY

Democratic printial ndidate Robert F. Kennedy Jr. has a history of repeatedly sharg unfound nspiraci that man-ma chemils the environment uld be makg children gay or transgenr and g the femizatn of boys and masculizatn of girls. * gay symptoms in children *

The rrelatn is much weaker the other directn: A disproportnate number of boys who don’t nform to genr stereotyp turn out to be gay men, but lots of gay men played wh G. Gay 3-year-old boys n’t verbalize their sire to be wh a man when they grow up—although many such children exhib cshlike behavr toward adult men—but they may be tryg to learn the behavr that will later attract a male partner. First, let’s talk about what you don’t ’t jump to nclns if you thk your son is gay or dghter is I largely did f to the stereotypil riture of a gay man, not every gay person do.

MANY PARENTS STGGLE TO ADJT AFTER LEARNG CHILD IS GAY, STUDY FDS

Many parents stggle for years to adjt after learng child is gay, acrdg to a new study om Gee Washgton Universy public health rearchers. * gay symptoms in children *

There are no symptoms of gay that you n watch out for, bee beg gay isn’t a disorr; kids who are gay and kids who are straight e all shap, siz and ’t speculate about your kid’s sexualy to others. And send, your child may not know or be fully fortable their sexualy – so they might not have an answer, but still feel prsure to give I realized I might be gay, at age 16, I’d often vehemently oppose homosexualy my nversatns or bsh unr the rpet.

THE INFLUENCE OF CONCERNS ABOUT A CHILD'S SEXUAL ORIENTATN ON MENTAL HEALTH AMONG PARENTS OF LBIAN, GAY, AND BISEXUAL CHILDREN HONG KONG

Sexual mory strs affects not only lbian, gay, and bisexual (LGB) dividuals, but also their fai. Due to the pervasivens of stigma and discrimatn, parents of LGB children often exprs ncerns about the public perceptn of their child's sexual orientatn and s possible impact … * gay symptoms in children *

) Most of have lived our liv a hetero-normative society, so might take time for gay kids to e to terms wh brgs me to the do’s:Do give your child reason to believe you’d accept them if/when they e out to you. Rather than ask if your son is gay or dghter is gay, or watch for signs your child is gay, what you n do (and what my parents did, unknowgly) is make your kid believe that g out to parents would be way to do is by watchg gay-iendly media, like the Satyamev Jayate episo about sexualy, durg or after which you n mentn how brave you thk Gazal was for g to terms wh her trans inty and how you appreciate her parents’ efforts to stand by her si.

) And yet another way is to expose your child om the start to spirg stori of LGBTIQ ins like Harvey Milk, Freddie Mercury, and Ellen will all go a long way to nveyg to your child that, if they’re not gay, there’s still much to emulate the role mols; and if your child is gay, they n e out to you “bee ’s okay, ” as DeGener put a 1997 terview wh Oprah.

STIGMA EXPERIENC, MENTAL HEALTH, PERCEIVED PARENTG COMPETENCE, AND PARENT–CHILD RELATNSHIPS AMONG LBIAN, GAY, AND HETEROSEXUAL ADOPTIVE PARENTS THE UNED STAT

Adoptive parents often face stigma related to “non-tradnal” fay stctur. Lbian and gay (LG) adoptive parents often face addnal stigmatizatn based on sexual inty, which turn may negatively affect parents’ mental health. Dpe ntroversy about LG parentg, rearch monstrat that fay procs are more strongly associated wh dividual out than fay stcture. Th, fay systems and mory strs theori provid our nceptual foundatn examg how adoptive LG parents’ stigma experienc were associated wh mental health, parentg petence, and parent–child relatnships. Participatg fai (N = 106; n = 56 LG parent fai) were origally reced om five US domtic private fant adoptn agenci and pleted two wav of data llectn (W1, W2; 91% retentn) when children were prchool-age (Mage = 3.01 years) and school-age (Mage = 8.36 years), rpectively. Data for the current study are largely drawn om W2. Via Qualtrics, parents pleted asssments of mental health symptoms, adoptn stigma, and perceived childre petence. LG parents also reported on their experienc of homonegative microaggrsns, and children rpond to a measure about their relatnships wh parents. No signifint differenc emerged as a functn of parental sexual orientatn and genr except that lbian mothers, heterosexual mothers, and gay fathers all reported higher parentg petence than heterosexu... * gay symptoms in children *

A lot of parents don’t exactly expect their kids to be gay, so adaptg personal expectatns and dreams might be difficult – but you don’t need your child’s nfirmatn to do . If you want to ask so you n reassure your child of your acceptance, there are better ways to do (see above) you want to know whether your son is gay or dghter is gay bee you’re worried they’re havg sex, you don’t need to know wh what genr to talk to them about safe sexual practic and HIV preventn. It’ll be awkward, but ’s important, so get over you want to know bee you’re stgglg to accept the possibily that your son is gay or dghter is gay, now is the time to nont your own prejudice.

Fally, whether or not you’re 100% acceptg, the last two pots are most important if you thk your child is gay:Do make sure your child knows there’s more to life than a person’s sexualy.

Probably they see you as a mother or father, a succsful profsnal, a supportive iend or neighbour, a good cizen, bee you are all those thgs; gay or straight, your child n be all of those thgs and more, too. Parents of gay children may be shocked when their kids e out of the closet, but once the dt settl, most parents realize that their child is the same one they have loved and red for all their liv, they jt happen to be gay. So, for example, boys that play wh dolls and have primarily girliends or girls who are tomboys and prefer to play wh guns may have an creased likelihood of growg up to be gay.

*BEAR-MAGAZINE.COM* GAY SYMPTOMS IN CHILDREN

The Influence of Concerns About a Child's Sexual Orientatn on Mental Health Among Parents of Lbian, Gay, and Bisexual Children Hong Kong - PubMed .

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