Don't Be Bored: Simon Doonan on Gay Men Don't Get Fat - Washgton Cy Paper

Contents:

• THE REAL REASON GAY MEN DON'T GET FAT
• DON’T BE BORED: SIMON DOONAN ON GAY MEN DON’T GET FAT
• GAY MEN DON'T GET FAT
• GAY MEN DON'T GET FAT
• GAY FAT
• GAY MEN DON'T GET FAT
• GAY MEN DON'T GET FAT
• FAT GAY MEN
• IF YOU’RE A GAY MAN, YOU’RE PROBABLY GOG ABOUT WEIGHT LOSS ALL WRONG
• GAY MEN DON'T GET FAT

THE REAL REASON GAY MEN DON'T GET FAT

New York gay about town and Barneys creative director Simon Doonan jt sold a mancript for a diet book lled Gay Men Don't Get Fat. While this is te, the real reason why gay men don't get fat might not be the most marketable msage. The book is supposedly, "a stylishly slimmg disurse that prov gay men really ARE French women: prone to disda, favorg cheeky unrwear, nvced of their own artistic brilliance, and (of urse) lorie-obssed.

The advice as to why gay men don't get fat isn't as is only one thg that keeps gay men shape: fear. Y, every gay—at least those of the stereotypil abdomal-obssed physique that populat Fire Island and Palm Sprgs—is brought about bee gay men are aaid that they will be alone for the rt of their liv. If a gay man is not "servg body" while petg to fd a trick or boyiend one of the more mcle-bound climat of gay culture, he will be sorely shut out.

That is why gay men don't get fat, bee if they don't have pecs, guns, and glut, they're gog home men, unlike their straight unterparts, don't have the luxury to stay "fightg shape" jt long enough to fd a partner before lettg their bodi fall to sh afterwords. No, gay men have to get buff, get married, and stay buff. I'm gog to let you on a ltle secret: There are untls mted gay upl out there who like to eher play on the si or ve gut stars to their beds.

DON’T BE BORED: SIMON DOONAN ON GAY MEN DON’T GET FAT

Y, gay men go to the gym to stay petive, but sce the man-eatg marathon don't end after marriage, they jt keep on petg and petg until ath do they funny thg about the gay petn is that, bee men (pecially of the gay variety) are so visually stimulated, the only piece on the chs board that matters is havg that tradnal lean body.

But for gay men, only body will do. If a gay guy is a ltle short, his solutn is to go to the gym. A good body is the only currency this also mak this unique for gay men is one of the other strange quirks of homosexualy.

Gay men are attracted to, sentially, themselv. No straight man wants to look like a woman (and certaly not the reverse) but gay men fd what they are physilly attracted to and often remake their bodi the image of their ial mate.

GAY MEN DON'T GET FAT

Sce society tells to want mcle-bound athlet, that's what gays want, and that's what they make themselv look like the pursu of their ial. If you want to bed mcl you have to have mcl, if you want to land a twk, you better be a twk (or at least some other type that is easily st any gay porn movie), gay men e all shap and siz (embrace the rabow, people) but still gay culture and inography is largely domated by the same juiced-out body type (and awful tribal tattoos) that you'd fd on Jersey Shore. While there are plenty of average-physiqued homosexuals (who barely mer mentng) there has been a reactn to all this body fascism over the past so many years.

Y, the "bear" movement, spearhead by gay men who are hairier and chubbier than average, is forever gag steam.

GAY MEN DON'T GET FAT

While they might be reversg the normal athetic ials of gay culture and Amerin culture at large, they still discrimate jt as much based on physily as their circu party-lovg is tryg to palize on those skny gay men of legend, but what erns them and erns the bear is really the same thg: fear. Many gay men spend their adolcence as outsts or misfs, and when they fally get to a place where they n jo the gay culture at large, they react to their years of social solu by nformg wh the sort of fervor ually rerved for packs of teenage girls.

GAY FAT

Most gay men get for ee, and now, wh this book, you too n be a pariah for years, then enter a nformist culture of sual sex and glisteng bodi, followed by a lifetime of hookups wh your signifint other and the waxed dolphs you pick up on Grdr. That's the secret of how gay men don't get me, well, I'd much rather be French.

Simon Doonan’s latt book, Gay Men Don’t Get Fat, is clearly not terted tth. Like his 2008 liftyle book, Eccentric Glamour, purveys a type of fabu-wisdom—a twkly, floral-prted, and meticuloly taloged unrstandg of the world, where gay men are French women wh penis (his words), straight men are burpy and totally yuck, and even food is eher homo or hetero (Italian entre, straight; Italian sserts, gay).

GAY MEN DON'T GET FAT

“Only an idt would read [Gay Men Don’t Get Fat] thkg they were gettg Wikipedia or somethg. Most prompts for gay porn, meanwhile, explibly flt to people of ambiguoly LatX scent wh an unrcut hairstyle. Is that ditive of the typ of gay porn the mols were traed on?

A gay uple, as picted by Unstable Diffn.

Gay Men Don't Get Fat|Simon Doonan. Gay men don't get fat.

GAY MEN DON'T GET FAT

Homosexualy -- Humor, Gay men -- Humor, Gay men, Homosexualy. urn:lcp:gaymendontgetfat0000doon:lcpdf:9b515c65-5c2f-4522-9b81-4c3f4592f4b3.

FAT GAY MEN

urn:lcp:gaymendontgetfat0000doon:epub:e0cf36b0-5432-48d2-a194-1f8281fa2eb8. gaymendontgetfat0000doon. A gay man who do not have a gym-perfect body, but rather rri a body fat percentage the 12% - 20% range.

A man who is nsired gay fat wh the muny would likely be nsired athletic, physilly f and -shape wh the greater cultural Hey, n I e one of your gut pass for the gym? Jerome: Hontly, I don't know that a fourth straight w will make you any more fuckable, but 's easier to give you the pass than to host a full-blown gay fat terventn a few weeks if you don't the gay fat Fat is a term ed to scribe a man that’s not really fat or skny however when he’s gay fat he’s too fat to be accepted by the male gay muny and he’s skny but fat and or droopy all the wrong plac such as nippl abdomen area the Gay Fat moons ago, Billy and Phil, two bt pals om the cy of Clarksburg, began surg the ter for a h new mic act.

IF YOU’RE A GAY MAN, YOU’RE PROBABLY GOG ABOUT WEIGHT LOSS ALL WRONG

What they got was Da Fat Gay Retards.

After many months of fat, gay retardns they fally had a song to promote; that song beg the absolutely enchantg, "lter-oats". Billy and Phil, not wantg to upset the gay duo, plied.

The da gay fat retards mug. Simon Doonan knows that when to style, the gays are the chosen people. In this hilar disurse on and gui to the well-lived life, Doonan go far beyond the secrets to eatg like the French—he prov that gay men really are French women, om their light fashn, to their brilliant choic accsori and dér, to their awe-spirg abily to lim lorie take.

GAY MEN DON'T GET FAT

A Gucci-wearg Margaret Mead at heart, Doonan offers his own imable life experienc and unnny sights to mak gay people driven to live every day feelg their bt, and prov that they have jt as much—and possibly better—wisdom, advice, and spiratn beyond the same old diet and exercise put down that bag of Pirate’s Booty and pick up this fierce and fabulo book. From slimmg jnts through Capri the eveng to an trepid “Bear” hunt (if you have to ask, you have to read this book and fd out for yourself), Gay Men Don’t Get Fat is the ultimate approach to a glamoro liftyle—pl, you are guaranteed to lgh away the pounds!

The purpose of this book is to extract eful nuggets and nuanc om my gay life and hurl them your directn, often wh tremendo force and gto.

English-born Doonan (Wacky Chicks) do jt that this hilar and sometim smarmy acunt of the social mor of the gay muny. Havg spent more than two s drsg wdows at Barneys New York before takg up wrg, Doonan has had plenty of experience wh the gay non a broad cultural smasbord which provis a quirky, thought-provokg lchp or reference pot for every creative moment. There are chapters on face lifts and liposuctn (generally to be avoid), gay subcultur, and a glossary of a secret gay lgua Palare.