Fear of Beg Gay | NOCD

Contents:

• HOW DO I KNOW I’M NOT REALLY GAY/STRAIGHT?
• 'HOMOSEXUAL OCD': STRAIGHT MEN WHO SPECT THEY ARE GAY
• YOU’RE NOT GAY: HOMOSEXUALY ANXIETY OCD

HOW DO I KNOW I’M NOT REALLY GAY/STRAIGHT?

In my practice, I sometim enunter men who are so obssively worried they may be gay or bisexual that tak up such a signifint amount of their daily life and thoughts and them nearly cripplg anxiety. ” He may worry that he appears to be gay if cross his legs at the knee like a woman when stg down rather than havg the typil “man spread. Like those wh Obssive-Compulsive Disorr (OCD), he may exhib the same kd of repet behavrs, such as stg and standg over and over aga to see if they may appear gay the way he do .

This may sound like ’s a set-up for a joke, or an ongog lgh le a s, but is a real disorr that some have labeled as Homosexual Obssive-Compulsive Disorr (HOCD), though the Diagnostic and Statistil Manual of Mental Disorrs, the “bible” of psychiatry, has yet to regnize .

'HOMOSEXUAL OCD': STRAIGHT MEN WHO SPECT THEY ARE GAY

HOCD n sudnly occur for some men who, for example, fd themselv beg h on by other gay or bisexual men, mistaken for beg a gay or bisexual man, fd themselv attracted to another man or stumble onto gay porn that exc them. They will often blame the thgs as reasons for how the HOCD started, but isn’t about homosexualy nor bisexualy, is about OCD. In my own clil experience workg wh the men, those who suffer om this may fd themselv obssively lookg at porn, eher gay or straight, to see if they bee sexually exced by eher.

They might nstantly check out others’ reactns to their gtur or nversatn to see if they get any strange looks or other signals that would imply homophobia. They sometim will go to extreme lengths, such as havg sex wh men even though they are not gay or bisexual, which typilly leav them feelg unsatisfied and unfortable.

YOU’RE NOT GAY: HOMOSEXUALY ANXIETY OCD

Even though they have not been able to nfirm by their pulsive experimentatn that they are, ed, gay, they may even ask me to help them e out as gay or bisexual jt to end the sufferg. I am a specialist sexual orientatn and relatnships and not traed to al wh OCD, so I first mt set out to terme if they are simply closeted gay or bisexual men, or if there is somethg else gog on. Influenced by the heated atmosphere around sexual polics nowadays, and even the amount of media verage around LGBTQ issu, some gays argue that the g-out procs they went through much of the same nfn, and therefore believe that the HOCD person is simply experiencg the same thg.

Theirs is a particular kd of trouble, one that will not be rolved by “g out of the closet” bee they tly are not gay or bisexual.

There are some clil therapists, such as Monni Williams, thor of Homosexual Anxiety: A Misunrstood Form of OCD Leadg Health Edutn Issu, who may help brg more a ser nversatn of this disorr to the theraptic world. SO-OCD clus worri about experiencg an unwanted change sexual orientatn, fears that others may thk one is gay, or fear that one has hidn same-sex sir. Lbian, gay, and bisexual (LBG) people who have negative feelgs about their own sexualy are said to have ternalized homophobia or ternalized heterosexism (IH), but most people wh SO-OCD are fact heterosexual, so this nceptualizatn is generally not applible to SO-OCD sufferers.