Navigatg the social grac of our ever-changg society n be tricky, and perhaps trickier for gays and lbians. Many wonr how to rpond to offensive jok or how to addrs a letter to a married gay uple. Steven Petrow giv answers his new book Steven Petrow's Complete Gay and Lbian Manners. He speaks wh gut host Jacki Lyn.
Contents:
- THE GAY VOICE
- HOW TO TALK WH A GAY OR LBIAN PERSON
- HOW TO SUPPORT, EMPATHIZE WH, AND AFFIRM LGBTQ+ PEOPLE
- HOW TO TALK ABOUT BEG GAY
- GAY STEREOTYP: ARE THEY TE?
- STEP-BY-STEP INSTCTNS FOR SHOOTG YOUR SHOT WH GAY GUYS
- WHAT MEANS TO ‘SOUND GAY’
- HOW TO KNOW IF YOU ARE GAY
THE GAY VOICE
If you are an ally of the LGBT+ muny, you may be ncerned about behavg a way that supports that attu. If you stggle to accept gay people, you may not be sure how to talk to them whout brgg up your own beliefs.... * how do gay people talk *
After intifyg phoic characteristics that seem to make a man’s voice sound gay, their bt hunch is that some gay men may subnscly adopt certa female speech patterns.
They want to know how men acquire this manner of speakg, and why – pecially when society so often stigmatiz those wh gay-soundg voic.
HOW TO TALK WH A GAY OR LBIAN PERSON
It’s hard to know how to talk about beg gay, pecially when young, but the tips and nsiratns n help you ci how to talk about beg gay. * how do gay people talk *
GLAAD prefers that we don’t e the term homosexual bee ’s “aggrsively ed by anti-gay extremists to suggt that gay people are somehow diseased or psychologilly/emotnally disorred. Beg a gay man or lbian do not mean that they are attracted to every sgle person they meet that is of the same sex, jt like you aren't attracted to every sgle person you meet that is of the oppose sex.
If you are a person who stggl to accept LGBT+ people for whatever reason, and believe that is wrong then you may feel tempted to be mean to a gay or lbian person. Lecturg a gay or lbian person about why their sexualy is, your opn, wrong will not make them sudnly say, “Oh, you know what, you're right.
Would you change your md about beg heterosexual if a gay or lbian person me up to you and started talkg about why heterosexualy is wrong?
HOW TO SUPPORT, EMPATHIZE WH, AND AFFIRM LGBTQ+ PEOPLE
Learn how to approach and flirt wh gay guys at clubs, bars, or other venuMeetg gay guys is hard. First you have to terme if the guy you're terted is gay or straight. Then you have to approach him and strike up a... * how do gay people talk *
For example, many people tend to assume that a gay man will be drsed brightly lored clothg, have perfectly styled hair, and speak a feme way. G., "gay/lbian" to scribe attractn to the same sex/genr, "bisexual" to scribe attractn to multiple sex/genrs; "asexual" to scribe a lack of attractn to anyone, etc.
There is no specific way that a gay or lbian person acts, drs, or speaks—a person's sexual orientatn do not rrelate wh their genr exprsn. There may be, for stance, some gay people that scribe themselv as more mascule, feme, or genr-fluid, while lbian dividuals may siarly exprs themselv wh varyg gre of masculy, femy, or genr-fluidy.
HOW TO TALK ABOUT BEG GAY
What the way we talk says about gay pri and lgerg prejudice * how do gay people talk *
Work on dismissg any stereotyp that you may have about gay and lbian people so that you n start workg on seeg them as the people that they are. Another important part of unrstandg gay and lbian people is realizg people n't choose their sexualy, as 's an herent part of who they are. I know that talkg a certa way don't make somebody gay, and I know that beg gay don't make somebody talk a certa way, so why do the stereotype of a "gay voice" exist?
Sce 1975, APA has lled on psychologists to take the lead removg the stigma of mental illns that has long been associated wh lbian, gay, and bisexual orientatns.
The prejudice and discrimatn that people who intify as lbian, gay, or bisexual regularly experience have been shown to have negative psychologil effects. This page provis accurate rmatn for those who want to better unrstand sexual orientatn and the impact of prejudice and discrimatn on those who intify as lbian, gay, or bisexual.
GAY STEREOTYP: ARE THEY TE?
In the Uned Stat the most equent labels are lbians (women attracted to women), gay men (men attracted to men), and bisexual people (men or women attracted to both sex). Prejudice and discrimatn make difficult for many people to e to terms wh their sexual orientatn inti, so claimg a lbian, gay, or bisexual inty may be a slow procs.
There is no nsens among scientists about the exact reasons that an dividual velops a heterosexual, bisexual, gay, or lbian orientatn. Public opn studi over the 1970s, 1980s, and 1990s routely showed that, among large segments of the public, lbian, gay, and bisexual people were the target of strongly held negative attus. More recently, public opn has creasgly opposed sexual orientatn discrimatn, but exprsns of hostily toward lbians and gay men rema mon ntemporary Amerin society.
Severe antigay prejudice is reflected the high rate of harassment and vlence directed toward lbian, gay, and bisexual dividuals Amerin society. The HIV/AIDS panmic is another area which prejudice and discrimatn agast lbian, gay, and bisexual people have had negative effects.
STEP-BY-STEP INSTCTNS FOR SHOOTG YOUR SHOT WH GAY GUYS
Early the panmic, the assumptn that HIV/AIDS was a “gay disease” ntributed to the lay addrsg the massive social upheaval that AIDS would generate.
The associatn of HIV/AIDS wh gay and bisexual men and the accurate belief that some people held that all gay and bisexual men were fected served to further stigmatize lbian, gay, and bisexual people. On the social level, prejudice and discrimatn agast lbian, gay, and bisexual people are reflected the everyday stereotyp of members of the groups. The stereotyp persist even though they are not supported by evince, and they are often ed to exce unequal treatment of lbian, gay, and bisexual people.
For example, limatns on job opportuni, parentg, and relatnship regnn are often jtified by stereotypic assumptns about lbian, gay, and bisexual people. On an dividual level, such prejudice and discrimatn may also have negative nsequenc, pecially if lbian, gay, and bisexual people attempt to nceal or ny their sexual orientatn. Although many lbians and gay men learn to pe wh the social stigma agast homosexualy, this pattern of prejudice n have ser negative effects on health and well-beg.
WHAT MEANS TO ‘SOUND GAY’
The wispread prejudice, discrimatn, and vlence to which lbians and gay men are often subjected are signifint mental health ncerns.
Although social support is ccial pg wh strs, antigay attus and discrimatn may make difficult for lbian, gay, and bisexual people to fd such support. Dpe the persistence of stereotyp that portray lbian, gay, and bisexual people as disturbed, several s of rearch and clil experience have led all mastream medil and mental health anizatns this untry to nclu that the orientatns reprent normal forms of human experience. Furthermore, seems likely that the promotn of change therapi rerc stereotyp and ntribut to a negative climate for lbian, gay, and bisexual persons.
HOW TO KNOW IF YOU ARE GAY
Helpful rpons of a therapist treatg an dividual who is troubled about her or his same sex attractns clu helpg that person actively pe wh social prejudic agast homosexualy, succsfully rolve issu associated wh and rultg om ternal nflicts, and actively lead a happy and satisfyg life.
The phrase “g out” is ed to refer to several aspects of lbian, gay, and bisexual persons’ experienc: self-awarens of same-sex attractns; the tellg of one or a few people about the attractns; wispread disclosure of same-sex attractns; and intifitn wh the lbian, gay, and bisexual muny. Like heterosexuals, lbians, gay men, and bisexual people benef om beg able to share their liv wh and receive support om fay, iends, and acquatanc.