I'm Not Gay, Straight or Bi | Psychology Today

Contents:

• NOT GAY, NOT STRAIGHT: MEET THE YOUNG PEOPLE WHO REFE TO FE THEIR SEXUALY
• GAY, NOT GAY, STRAIGHT, NOT STRAIGHT
• HOW DO I KNOW I’M NOT REALLY GAY/STRAIGHT?
• I LIKE GUYS BUT I DON’T WANT TO BE GAY. HOW DO I STOP BEG GAY?
• IS YOUR MAN GAY, STRAIGHT, OR BISEXUAL?
• YOU’RE NOT GAY: HOMOSEXUALY ANXIETY OCD
• I'M NOT GAY, STRAIGHT OR BI

NOT GAY, NOT STRAIGHT: MEET THE YOUNG PEOPLE WHO REFE TO FE THEIR SEXUALY

We hear a lot about the Big Three Sexuali — straight, bisexual and gay. If you’re a young man, you might assume that eher you’re straight or you’re not, meang you’re likely gay and maybe bisexual. Yet the evince suggts that more young men intify or scribe themselv as mostly straight than intify as eher bisexual or gay bed.

GAY, NOT GAY, STRAIGHT, NOT STRAIGHT

Yet when the men were forced to choose between straight, bisexual or gay, about three-quarters marked straight bee for them bisexual, even if is unrstood as “bisexual-leang straight, ” is too gay to accurately scribe their inty. Tradnally, our unrstandg has been that if you’re male and have even a slight attractn to the same sex, then you mt be gay. He knows he’s not gay, but straight wh a dash of gayns.

But how much gayns? He’s not transng toward intifyg as bisexual or gay.

He’s not a closeted gay man who fears beg gay yet wants to keep a slight, perhaps secretive, gay si by danglg his potential for guy sex. He may retreat om a full intifitn wh heterosexualy, but rarely do he gravate toward bisexualy, and almost never do he move toward homosexualy of any sort. It is Mostly Straight: Sexual Fluidy Among Men, not Mostly Straight: Sexual Fluidy Among Gay Men.

HOW DO I KNOW I’M NOT REALLY GAY/STRAIGHT?

For19-year-old psychology stunt Greta Warren, the qutn of whether she f herself as gay or straight is a meangls terms, she believ, are jt labels. "It's somethg I found tratg durg the marriage referendum wh everyone mentg on and celebratg the gay and lbian right to marriage, wh ltle to no reference to everyone else on the sexualy spectm, " she might sound unual, but fact Greta's viewpot is one that more and more of her ntemporari share. A poll published the UK last week by YouGov showed that jt 46pc of 18 to 24-year-olds nsired themselv to be exclively straight, but only 6pc classed themselv as homosexual.

Those who rated a zero were emed exclively heterosexual, while the people who rated a six exclively homosexual. "I'm neher gay nor straight, not a ltle of both.

I will never fet the pths of prsn I faced when I felt like I didn't f 'gay or straight'.

I LIKE GUYS BUT I DON’T WANT TO BE GAY. HOW DO I STOP BEG GAY?

"A lot of young people are more fortable to not intify any one strict tegory, " says Ois McKenna of youth webse "But 's te that they might also intify a unique kd of discrimatn, and even rejectn om gay or straight people. And we believe that we unrstand somethg important about a person if we know whether she or he is straight or gay.

IS YOUR MAN GAY, STRAIGHT, OR BISEXUAL?

Regrettably, social and blogil scientists have been plic by parg straights vers gays/lbians their rearch signs, while fettg everyone else who don’t intify as one of the.

Yet the mands for new rearch are real: Right now, we thk people are eher straight or gay, as if one drop of gayns mak you gay, even if this means distortg the sexual and romantic experienc of lns of teenagers and young adults who are neher gay nor straight. In orr to have doubts about one’s sexual inty, a sufferer need not ever have had a homo- or heterosexual experience, or any type of sexual experience at all. If the sufferer is heterosexual, then the thought may be that they are homosexual.

YOU’RE NOT GAY: HOMOSEXUALY ANXIETY OCD

If on the other hand they happen to be homosexual they may obss about the possibily that they might really be straight.

” Some people’s doubts are further plited by havg such experienc as hearg other people talkg or lookg their directn and thkg that the people mt be analyzg their behavr or appearance and talkg about them – discsg how they mt be gay (or straight). For those wh thoughts of beg homosexual, part of the distrs mt surely be social orig. Let’s face , gay people have always been an opprsed mory wh our culture, and to sudnly thk of beg this posn, and to be stigmatized this way, n be ighteng.

I have sometim wonred if those who experience the most distrs om such thoughts as the do so bee they were raised wh more strongly homophobic or anti-gay attus to beg wh, or if is simply bee one’s sexualy n be such a basic doubt. Lookg at attractive men or women, or pictur of them, or readg sexually oriented lerature or pornography (hetero- or homosexual), to see if they are sexually excg.

I'M NOT GAY, STRAIGHT OR BI

Observg themselv for evince of “lookg, ” talkg, walkg, drsg, or gturg like someone who is eher gay or straight. Compulsively reviewg and analyzg past teractns wh other men or women to see if they have acted like a gay or straight person. Readg articl on the ter about how an dividual n tell if they are gay or straight to see which group they might be most siar to.