Beware: All of The Thgs Are Gay

Contents:

• HOW GAY ARE YOUR PANTS?
• BEWARE: ALL OF THE THGS ARE GAY
• SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS GAY? NICKELOON JT RERCED THAT THEORY
• IS A SIGN OF BEG GAY IF A MALE WEARS A WHE TROERS THE UK?

HOW GAY ARE YOUR PANTS?

As we found out om Joe Srborough's vis to The View this week and the backlash that ensued, your pants n apparently be gay.

BEWARE: ALL OF THE THGS ARE GAY

Real gay.

Like other piec of clothg, there are variatns among gen and speci of pant rangg om pleats, cut, f, lor, and recently, and thanks to polil figur like Joe Srborough and Anthony Weer, gay or not gay has bee a termg characteristic. Srborough's sartorial choice of wearg salmon-lored chos ed people like Joy Behar and nservative blogs like Townhall to dub his pants homosexual. Siarly, Anthony Weer's choice of bright-red pant at a DOMA lg rally earlier this summer, and Weer's own ments about them prompted The New York Tim's Lawrence Down to ask: "Is he really sayg he hasn’t had time to change out of his gay pants?

SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS GAY? NICKELOON JT RERCED THAT THEORY

"Weer, gog by what he's told women the past, is obvly not gay.

But this brgs to this necsary qutn: What mak pants gay?

IS A SIGN OF BEG GAY IF A MALE WEARS A WHE TROERS THE UK?

Is the pant or the wearer that mak gay? In January of last year, Barney's Simon Doonan ma the assertn that animate, particularly food, n be gay.

Doonan said that gay food is lighter, brighter, more artistic, art-directed and lbian or heterosexual food is heavier, droopier, burlier. To that, Srborough noted this morng that he believ that lor has a termg effect on the gayns of a pant and that the Nantucket Red pantone ma his pants homosexual.

" Weer asked a gay mpaign staffer. "Usg those metrics: f, cut, burls, and lor, we've e up wh a pletely unscientific Ksey sle of pant homosexualy. The dad jean is the least homosexual pant on the pla.