Hontly, this thread is the bt way to make sure L Chat gay mors are never taken is terrible at the lls, so g up here means
Contents:
- 'SHE'S A MONSTER': LRA INGRAHAM'S GAY BROTHER LASH OUT TERVIEW
- *PARENTHOOD’*S LREN GRAHAM IS NOT AAID TO HUMP A CHAIR TO GET A MOVIE ROLEBY ERIC SPZNAGELSEPTEMBER 10, 2010SAVE THIS STORYSAVESAVE THIS STORYSAVEBY DAN STEBERG/AP PHOTO.THERE ARE TWO VERY DIFFERENT LREN GRAHAMS. THE ONE YOU’RE PROBABLY MOST FAIAR WH IS THE FORMER STAR OF GILMORE GIRLS, A TV SHOW THAT RAN FOR SEVEN YEARS ON THE WB WORK, ABOUT A QUIRKY, FAST-TALKG, POP CULTURE SAVVY SGLE MOTHER (PLAYED BY GRAHAM) AND HER QUIRKY, FAST-TALKG, POP CULTURE SAVVY TEENAGE DGHTER. THE SHOW WAS BELOVED AMONG DIENC AND CRICS WHO LIKE THEIR DRAMA CUTE AND EXTRA-WASPY. THIS YEAR, GRAHAM JOED THE ENSEMBLE ST OF YET ANOTHER FAY-IENDLY TV SHOW, THE NBC DRAMA PARENTHOOD, WHERE SHE ONCE AGA PLAYS A QUIRKY (THOUGH NOT QUE AS FAST-TALKG OR POP CULTURE SAVVY) SGLE MOM.AND THEN THERE’S THE OTHER LREN GRAHAM, THE ONE WE HAVEN’T SEEN AWHILE, WHO -STARRED ALONGSI BILLY BOB THORNTON THE 2003 DARK EDY BAD SANTA. THAT LREN GRAHAM WASN’T NEARLY AS NOCENTLY ADORABLE AS HER TV STAR UNTERPART, UNLS YOUR IA OF ADORABLE VOLV HAVG FILTHY PUBLIC SEX WH A GUY DRSED LIKE SANTA CLS. THE BAD SANTA LREN GRAHAM WAS CRASS AND WHE TRASHY AND NOT SHY ABOUT ENGAGG ADULT SUATNS ONT OF MORS. IN OTHER WORDS, THE PLETE ANTHIS OF EVERYTHG THE LREN GRAHAM OF GILMORE GIRLS AND PARENTHOOD HAS E TO REPRENT.BEFORE I LLED GRAHAM FOR OUR TERVIEW, I TRIED TO PUT BAD SANTA OUT OF MY MD. BEE REALLY, WHAT POSSIBLE GOOD ULD E OM THAT? SHE WAS LIKELY EXPECTG QUTNS ABOUT THE NEW SEASON OF PARENTHOOD, WHICH PREMIER THIS TUDAY, SEPTEMBER 14, AT 10:00 P.M. EST ON NBC, AND NOT HOPELSLY OUT-OF-DATE QUTNS ABOUT THE TIME SHE GRD ON BILLY BOB’S LAP AND GROWLED, “FUCK ME, SANTA! FUCK ME, SANTA! FUCK ME, SANTA!” WHO NEEDS TO BE REMD OF THAT? CERTALY NOT ANYBODY WHO STILLS TIVOS GILMORE GIRLS REPEATS OR HAS EVEN A MODICUM OF TERT WATCHG PARENTHOOD. AND YET, THE BAD SANTA VERSN OF LREN GRAHAM IS THE ONE I LOVE AND MISS AND WISH WOULD RETURN NOW AND AGA. IT’S WHAT WE THE JOURNALISM TRA LL AN ETHIL DILEMMA.ERIC SPZNAGEL: YOU PLAY A CHARACTER ON PARENTHOOD NAMED SARAH BRAVERMAN. HOW DO FEEL TO HAVE THE MOST PRETENT LAST NAME THE HISTORY OF TELEVISN?LREN GRAHAM: I KNOW, RIGHT? IT SOUNDS LIKE BRAGGG. THE BRAVERMANS. BRAVER MEN. IT’S A NAME THAT SAYS, “WE’RE BRAVER THAN YOUR FAY.”DO SHE FIGHT CRIME WH HER BT PAL, JOHNNY B. COURAGEO?THE LAST TIME I DID A CHARACTER LIKE THAT—WH A NAME THAT MA FEEL IMPOSSIBLE TO FILL HER SHO—WAS MOLLY DAVENPORT (OM THE 1998 S CONRAD BLOOM). SHE JT SOUND LIKE AN OLD-TIMEY REPORTER ON THE BEAT, WH A HAT THAT SAID PRESS.I NEVER SAW THE SHOW. WAS SHE A REPORTER?I DON’T REMEMBER. PROBABLY NOT. NONE OF MY CHARACTERS HAVE REALLY HAD JOBS.SERLY? I KNOW YOU’VE PLAYED A LOT OF MOMS, BUT NEVER A CHARACTER WH AN E?WELL, LORELAI GILMORE RAN AN N, WHICH BASILLY MEANT THAT FOR SEVEN YEARS I HAND KEYS TO DAY PLAYERS WHO WERE RRYG LUGGAGE. THAT IS WHAT PEOPLE WHO N HOTELS DO. I ALSO ANSWERED THE PHONE. AND OCSNALLY I TEND TO PEOPLE LIKE NORMAN MAILER THE DG ROOM. BUT OTHER THAN THAT, I’VE DONE MOSTLY STAY-AT-HOME MOMS.MOST POPULARWH MATRO, LEONARD BERNSTE’S LEGACY AND LOV FALLY H THE BIG SCREENBY REBEC FORD25 PERFECT TV EPISOS FROM THE LAST 25 YEARSBY HILLARY BISTHE BOOK OF CLARENCE IS A BOMBASTIC JOURNEY BACK TO THE BIBLIL ERABY REBEC FORDON THIS SEASON OF PARENTHOOD, YOU CHARACTER IS VOLVED A LOVE TRIANGLE WH BILLY BALDW AND THE GAY GUY NAMED J OM TE BLOOD. WHO ARE YOU ROOTG FOR?I’M NOT TAKG SIS. I DON’T KNOW THAT EHER OF THEM ARE THE ANSWER. IT’S MORE AN EXPRSN OF HOPE SARAH’S LIFE. LAST YEAR SHE ULDN’T GET A BREAK. SHE HAD A NICE THG GOG WH THAT CUTE ENGLISH TEACHER, JASON RTER, BUT NOW HE’S GONE. APPARENTLY HE LEFT HER TO BEE A TERRORIST.YOU MEAN ON THE EVENT ? ISN’T THAT AN ENTIRELY DIFFERENT SHOW?OH NO, ’S ALL NNECTED. ALL TV SHOWS ARE BASILLY PART OF THE SAME STORYLE.AH, I GET YOU. THERE WAS A CHARACTER NAMED SOOKIE ON GILMORE GIRLS AND NOW THERE’S A SOOKIE ON TE BLOOD. ARE THEY THE SAME PERSON?NO, NO, NO. THAT’S A DIFFERENT SOOKIE. OUR SOOKIE IS FOR SOME REASON BEG LLED MOLLY NOW. SHE’S ON A CBS SHOW (LLED MIKE & MOLLY), AND I DON’T KNOW WHAT SHE’S DOG WH THAT GUY MIKE. HE IS NOT OM STARS HOLLOW AND I’M JT REALLY NFED BY THE WHOLE THG. MAYBE ’S THE WNS PROTECTN PROGRAM? BUT SHE’S ON BILLBOARDS EVERYWHERE, SO THAT OBVLY DIDN’T WORK.WHEN YOU HEARD THAT BILLY BALDW WAS GOG TO BE YOUR LOVE TERT, DID YOU HAVE TO THK FOR A MOMENT, “HOLD ON, IS HE ONE OF THE CRAZY BALDW BROTHERS?”NO, I WAS EXCED. (PARENTHOOD -STAR) PETER KRSE WORKED WH HIM ON DIRTY SEXY MONEY AND HE REALLY ENJOYED WORKG WH HIM. ALSO, THERE AREN’T MANY ACTORS OUT THERE WHO ARE TALLER THAN ME. SO WE HAD TO PICK OM A SMALL LIST.YOU’RE ONLY, WHAT, 5’ 9”, 5’ 10”? AND YOU STILL HAVE A HARD TIME FDG ACTORS WHO N DO A SCENE WH YOU AT EYE LEVEL?I’M 5’ 9”, AND Y, ’S BEEN DIFFICULT. I’M PRETTY SURE WE WENT THROUGH ALL THE TALL GUYS ON GILMORE GIRLS. I DATED ALL OF THEM. I SAW JON HAMM AT THE EMMI THE OTHER DAY, AND I WAS LIKE, “YOU KNOW YOU OWE ALL TO ME.” HE PLAYED THE MOST THANKLS BOYIEND ON GILMORE GIRLS, A DATE THAT NEVER REALLY HAPPENS. AND I REMEMBER THKG AT THE TIME, “WHAT IS THIS GEO TALL GUY DOG WHOUT HIS OWN TV SHOW?”AFTER THGS DIDN’T WORK OUT WH LORELAI, HE WENT BACK TIME TO THE 60S AND BEME AN ALHOLIC WHO WORKS ADVERTISG.THAT’S RIGHT. AND HE REALLY CHEATS ON HIS WIFE. LORELAI MT’VE WRECKED HIM. HE’S STILL HEARTBROKEN.I’M STARTG TO LOVE THIS CRAZY THEORY OF YOURS.IT REALLY DO MAKE SENSE, DON’T ?NOT AT ALL, BUT YOU’VE CHARMED ME TO BELIEVG . I’VE GOT A IEND NAMED NANCY WHO HAS A SIAR THEORY. SHE NEVER SAW SEFELD BEE SHE REF TO WATCH ANYTHG WH JASON ALEXANR AFTER HE TRIED TO RAPE JULIA ROBERTS PRETTY WOMAN.ARE YOU SER?THAT’S 100 PERCENT TE.MOST POPULARWH MATRO, LEONARD BERNSTE’S LEGACY AND LOV FALLY H THE BIG SCREENBY REBEC FORD25 PERFECT TV EPISOS FROM THE LAST 25 YEARSBY HILLARY BISTHE BOOK OF CLARENCE IS A BOMBASTIC JOURNEY BACK TO THE BIBLIL ERABY REBEC FORDBUT HE DIDN’T REALLY TRY TO RAPE HER, DID HE? HE TUGGED ON HER SKIRT A LTLE, RIGHT? IT WASN’T THAT BAD. OR AM I REMEMBERG WRONG?I DON’T THK THAT’S THE BT ARGUMENT AGAST BOYTTG JASON ALEXANR. A BETTER ARGUMENT WOULD BE “HE WAS AN ACTOR PLAYG A ROLE, AND NONE OF WAS REAL.”THAT TOO, SURE. THE GOOD NEWS IS THAT JULIA HAS BEEN TRAVELG TO INDIA AND ITALY LATELY, SO I THK SHE’S O.K.YOU PLAYED JERRY’S GIRLIEND ON AN EPISO OF SEFELD. DID JASON ALEXANR TRY TO RAPE YOU?(LGHS.) UM, NO.SO MY IEND’S THEORY IS PROBABLY RRECT.IT WOULD SEEM SO, Y.SO HERE’S MY DILEMMA, LREN. I’M NTRACTUALLY OBLIGATED TO ASK YOU ABOUT PARENTHOOD. BUT HONTLY, ALL I WANT TO DO IS TALK ABOUT BAD SANTA.I’M FE WH THAT.IT’S NOT PATHETIC TO TALK ABOUT A MOVIE THAT ME OUT SEVEN YEARS AGO?NOT AT ALL. I LOVED BEG THAT MOVIE. I DON’T THK I’VE WORN A LEATHER RSET SCE. I N STILL REMEMBER HOW TERRIFIED I WAS AT THE BAD SANTA DN. I HAD TO HUMP A CHAIR.I’M SORRY, SAY THAT AGA?I HUMPED A CHAIR. (LGHS.) AMONG OTHER THGS. I HAD TO DO BASILLY EVERYTHG THAT MY CHARACTER DO. AND A LOT OF IS VERY... VISUAL. THE SCRIPT READS PRETTY DARK. AND IF HAND’T BEEN DONE SO WELL, ULD’VE BEEN MUCH CREEPIER. I KNOW SOME PEOPLE FD CREEPY ANYWAY, BUT I FD VERY FUNNY AND SWEET. AND I THOUGHT BILLY WAS LIGHTFUL. IT STILL SERV TO EMBARRASS MY FATHER TO THIS DAY.DO BAD SANTA E UP A LOT NVERSATN WH YOUR DAD?NOT REALLY, NO. THE PERSON I’M MOST NCERNED ABOUT HIDG OM IS MY 90-YEAR-OLD GRANDMOTHER, WHO IS EXTREMELY NSERVATIVE. GILMORE GIRLS WAS A NICE SHOW FOR HER FOR THE MOST PART, ALTHOUGH SHE FOUND LORELAI A LTLE TOO LOOSE.BETWEEN SARAH BRAVERMAN AND LORELAI GILMORE, WHICH OF THEM IS MORE LIKELY TO HAVE SEX A R WH A HALF-DNK SANTA?LORELAI! WELL, WA... GOD, ’S A REAL TOSS-UP, ISN’T ? CSE NEHER OF THOSE GIRLS WERE TOO LUCKY LOVE. I THK WH LORELAI WOULD BE TOO RISKY. SHE’S A SMALL TOWN, AND THERE ARE TOO MANY PEOPLE WHO ULD FD OUT ABOUT , OR EVEN WALK BY WHEN SHE’S THE MIDDLE OF . MISS PATTY AND BABETTE DELL WOULD GOSSIP TO EVERYBODY. SO YEAH, PROBABLY SARAH BRAVERMAN.GILMORE GIRLS WAS A NON-STOP BARRAGE OF POP CULTURE NON-SEQUURS. I THK WE SHOULD TRY A SIAR APPROACH WH THIS TERVIEW.O.K. HAVEN’T I DONE THAT ALREADY?I’LL ASK SOME RAPID-FIRE, NON-SEQUUR QUTNS, AND YOU ANSWER AS QUICKLY AS YOU N. READY?DO !AVATAR. SHOULD WE WATCH A SEND TIME?I HAVEN’T WATCHED A FIRST TIME. THE BLUE PEOPLE SRED ME.CAN BLD PEOPLE SEE THEIR DREAMS?UM, WOW. I DON’T— THE ARE REALLY PHILOSOPHIL QUTNS MORE THAN RAPID-FIRE POP CULTURE QUTNS.MOST POPULARWH MATRO, LEONARD BERNSTE’S LEGACY AND LOV FALLY H THE BIG SCREENBY REBEC FORD25 PERFECT TV EPISOS FROM THE LAST 25 YEARSBY HILLARY BISTHE BOOK OF CLARENCE IS A BOMBASTIC JOURNEY BACK TO THE BIBLIL ERABY REBEC FORDSARAH PAL: CRAZY OR SUPER CRAZY?OH GOD. I’M A DEMOCRAT.HAVE YOU EVER PAID FOR ANYTHG ENTIRELY CHANGE?Y. THE NEW YORK CY SUBWAY. BELIEVE ME, THEY’RE NOT HAPPY ABOUT .THE GULF SPILL: WHERE’D ALL THE OIL GO?JT BIEBER’S HAIR?ARE PEOPLE WH OUTIE BELLYBUTTONS TRSILLY LS TSTWORTHY THAN NI?NO, BUT THEIR PARENTS ARE. HOW DID THEY LET THAT HAPPEN? THEY SHOULD BE ASHAMED.ASI OM JON STEWART, WHICH DAILY SHOW RRPONNT WOULD YOU LET GET TO THIRD BASE ON THE FIRST DATE?I’M IENDS WH AASIF MANDVI. DO THAT UNT?WHAT’S YOUR FAVORE CURSE WORD? AND PLEASE E A SENTENCE THAT ULD HAVE APPEARED A GILMORE GIRLS SCRIPT.YOU’RE GOG TO GET ME TROUBLE. I N’T DO THAT. I WILL TRMATIZE THE CHILDREN.HOW ABOUT PARENTHOOD?IT’D BE SOMETHG LIKE... OH J, I THK I’M TOO CATHOLIC TO DO THIS.HERE’S A QUTN YOU’RE PROBABLY SICK OF ANSWERG: WILL THERE BE A GILMORE GIRLS MOVIE?IT MIGHT. WHAT’S FUNNY TO ME IS THAT ALL THE YEARS, NO ONE EVER TALKED ABOUT EXCEPT THE FANS. BUT NOW PEOPLE WH POWER, PEOPLE WHO ULD ACTUALLY MAKE HAPPEN, ARE TALKG ABOUT . I THK ULD BE GOOD, BUT I WONR IF WE’VE WAED TOO LONG. I DON’T WANT TO BE WALKG AROUND THE TOWN SQUARE WH A NE.I HAVE FOUR REASONS WHY MIGHT BE A TERRIBLE IA: SEX. AND. THE. CY.HEY, E ON, I LIKED THOSE MOVI! I JT DON’T KNOW THAT A TV SHOW MANDS A MOVIE ENDG.HOW WOULD A GILMORE GIRLS MOVIE BE LS AWFUL THAN SEX AND THE CY 2? THE GALS WOULDN’T TAKE A TRIP TO ABU DHABI, I ASSUME. BUT OTHERWISE, WHAT KOOKY MISADVENTUR AWA THEM ON THE BIG SCREEN?IT’S HARD TO SAY BEE THE SHOW WAS NEVER VERY PLOT DRIVEN. THAT IS WHAT MIGHT BE UNVERED A TWO-HOUR MOVIE. YOU’D BE LIKE, “WA A MUTE, THEY JT TALK AND MAKE FUN OF THGS. THIS IS A TERRIBLE MOVIE.”IT MIGHT STILL BE A H, IF ’S DONE RIGHT. THE GILMORE GIRLS MOVIE WILL BE A HARD-R, Y?IF ’S A HORROR MOVIE, THEN ABSOLUTELY. BEE LORELAI IS OBVLY A KILLER, AND RORY IS HER ACPLICE.AND WE’VE ALL SPECTED THAT HER BOYIEND, LE OR WHATEVER, IS TO THE DIRTY STUFF.OH GOD.WHAT’S LE’S SECRET FETISH? AUTOEROTIC ASPHYXIATN?STOP ! (LGHS.) YOU’RE TRYG SO HARD TO GET ME TO ALIENATE EVERY TEENAGE DVD-BUYG GIRL OUT THERE. I’M NOT GOG THERE.ONE OF YOUR FIRST PAYG GIGS WAS DRSG LIKE STRYKER THE DOG, THE MAST FOR THE 1994 AMERI’S WORLD CUP SOCCER TEAM. HOW WAS YOUR MAST BETTER THAN OTHER MASTS?I NEVER PHONED . I ACTUALLY SED UNRNEATH MY GIANT FOAM HEAD FOR EVERY PICTURE, UNTIL THREE-QUARTERS OF THE WAY THROUGH THE DAY WHEN I REALIZED THAT NO ONE ULD SEE ME SG. BUT ISN’T THAT THE BETY OF ? NO ONE N SEE SE ON THE SI, N THEY?MOST POPULARWH MATRO, LEONARD BERNSTE’S LEGACY AND LOV FALLY H THE BIG SCREENBY REBEC FORD25 PERFECT TV EPISOS FROM THE LAST 25 YEARSBY HILLARY BISTHE BOOK OF CLARENCE IS A BOMBASTIC JOURNEY BACK TO THE BIBLIL ERABY REBEC FORDRECENTLY, DONALD DUCK WAS ACCED OF FONDLG A GUT AT DISNEY WORLD. THERE’S NO EASY WAY TO ASK THIS, BUT NEEDS TO BE ADDRSED. LREN, DID YOU EVER FONDLE ANYONE AS STRYKER?OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD!IT’S TIME TO E CLEAN, LREN. THIS IS VANY FAIR. IT’S WHAT WE DO. YOU DIDN’T THK THIS TERVIEW WAS JT ABOUT PROMOTG YOUR SHOW, WAS ?O.K., O.K., FAIR ENOUGH. I THK I TRIED TO FONDLE SOMEONE, BUT MY GIANT HANDS WOULD ONLY ALLOW ME TO HUG THEM WARMLY AS A GOOD IEND.THAT’S THE GLORY OF THE BIG FOAM HANDS. IT’S EASY TO “ACCINTALLY” GET ISKY WHOUT SEEMG TOO PERVY.YOU DO REALIZE THIS WAS JT A TWO-DAY JOB, RIGHT? IT’S NOT SOMETHG I DID EVERY SUMMER AFTER LLEGE.JT TELL ME THIS. DID YOU HAVE TO HUMP A CHAIR FOR YOUR DN?NO, NOT AT ALL. I JT HAD TO BE TALL ENOUGH TO F THE STUME. IF YOU WEREN’T THE RIGHT HEIGHT, YOUR HEAD WOULD BE TOO HEAVY FOR YOUR BODY AND YOU’D FALL OVER. THE JOB GAVE ME SYMPATHY FOR PEOPLE WHO PLAY DISNEY CHARACTERS. I REALLY KNOW WHAT ’S LIKE THOSE STUM. THEY’RE SUFFERG FOR THEIR ART.IT ULD BE WORSE. A LOT OF ACTORS HAVE MUCH WORSE JOBS.ARE YOU KIDDG ME? NAME ONE!THE PORN DTRY.ALRIGHT, FE, YOU W. BUT AS FAR AS ROTTEN ACTG JOBS GO, BEG A MAST A CLOSE SEND.ERIC SPZNAGEL
'SHE'S A MONSTER': LRA INGRAHAM'S GAY BROTHER LASH OUT TERVIEW
Who better to ment on the gay gossip sany thats been swirlg around Dperate Hoewiv star Marcia Cross than Out and Village Voice lumnist Michael Mto, who has been verg the scene for 20 years. In this exclive terview, we talk to Mto about the origs of gay mors, how they... * is lauren graham gay *
She volunteered for people’s rights, whether gay, lbian, or straight. “Our father was a Nazi sympathizer, racist, anti-Seme and homophobe, ” Curtis Ingraham, who is gay, wrote alongsi a vio of his sister.
Shameful!, ” he wrote on Twter this her brother’s claims regardg her llege roommate have not been verified, Lra Ingraham has a long history of mentary and actns emed sultg by those margalized groups, cludg ethnic mori, immigrants and LGBTQ an edor at the nservative Dartmouth Review the early 1980s, Lra Ingraham reportedly sent a reporter to secretly tape a Gay Stunts Associatn meetg and then published excerpts om the meetg where people were discsg their sexual experienc and sexual nservative firebrand has also pared same-sex relatnships to ct, equated transn-related re to “child abe” and suggted people would rather wear “adult diapers” than share a rtroom wh a transgenr Ingraham did not immediately rpond to NBC News’ requt for ment, but he told the Daily Beast he felt pelled to start speakg out agast his sister bee of the current polil environment and her support for Print Donald a statement emailed to NBC News, Lra Ingraham said she was “shocked and sadned to learn of the false and hurtful onle postgs. Who better to ment on the gay gossip sany thats been swirlg around Dperate Hoewiv star Marcia Cross than Out and Village Voice lumnist Michael Mto, who has been verg the scene for 20 years. In this exclive terview, we talk to Mto about the origs of gay mors, how they spread, and what the juicit one h ever heard is.
*PARENTHOOD’*S LREN GRAHAM IS NOT AAID TO HUMP A CHAIR TO GET A MOVIE ROLEBY ERIC SPZNAGELSEPTEMBER 10, 2010SAVE THIS STORYSAVESAVE THIS STORYSAVEBY DAN STEBERG/AP PHOTO.THERE ARE TWO VERY DIFFERENT LREN GRAHAMS. THE ONE YOU’RE PROBABLY MOST FAIAR WH IS THE FORMER STAR OF GILMORE GIRLS, A TV SHOW THAT RAN FOR SEVEN YEARS ON THE WB WORK, ABOUT A QUIRKY, FAST-TALKG, POP CULTURE SAVVY SGLE MOTHER (PLAYED BY GRAHAM) AND HER QUIRKY, FAST-TALKG, POP CULTURE SAVVY TEENAGE DGHTER. THE SHOW WAS BELOVED AMONG DIENC AND CRICS WHO LIKE THEIR DRAMA CUTE AND EXTRA-WASPY. THIS YEAR, GRAHAM JOED THE ENSEMBLE ST OF YET ANOTHER FAY-IENDLY TV SHOW, THE NBC DRAMA PARENTHOOD, WHERE SHE ONCE AGA PLAYS A QUIRKY (THOUGH NOT QUE AS FAST-TALKG OR POP CULTURE SAVVY) SGLE MOM.AND THEN THERE’S THE OTHER LREN GRAHAM, THE ONE WE HAVEN’T SEEN AWHILE, WHO -STARRED ALONGSI BILLY BOB THORNTON THE 2003 DARK EDY BAD SANTA. THAT LREN GRAHAM WASN’T NEARLY AS NOCENTLY ADORABLE AS HER TV STAR UNTERPART, UNLS YOUR IA OF ADORABLE VOLV HAVG FILTHY PUBLIC SEX WH A GUY DRSED LIKE SANTA CLS. THE BAD SANTA LREN GRAHAM WAS CRASS AND WHE TRASHY AND NOT SHY ABOUT ENGAGG ADULT SUATNS ONT OF MORS. IN OTHER WORDS, THE PLETE ANTHIS OF EVERYTHG THE LREN GRAHAM OF GILMORE GIRLS AND PARENTHOOD HAS E TO REPRENT.BEFORE I LLED GRAHAM FOR OUR TERVIEW, I TRIED TO PUT BAD SANTA OUT OF MY MD. BEE REALLY, WHAT POSSIBLE GOOD ULD E OM THAT? SHE WAS LIKELY EXPECTG QUTNS ABOUT THE NEW SEASON OF PARENTHOOD, WHICH PREMIER THIS TUDAY, SEPTEMBER 14, AT 10:00 P.M. EST ON NBC, AND NOT HOPELSLY OUT-OF-DATE QUTNS ABOUT THE TIME SHE GRD ON BILLY BOB’S LAP AND GROWLED, “FUCK ME, SANTA! FUCK ME, SANTA! FUCK ME, SANTA!” WHO NEEDS TO BE REMD OF THAT? CERTALY NOT ANYBODY WHO STILLS TIVOS GILMORE GIRLS REPEATS OR HAS EVEN A MODICUM OF TERT WATCHG PARENTHOOD. AND YET, THE BAD SANTA VERSN OF LREN GRAHAM IS THE ONE I LOVE AND MISS AND WISH WOULD RETURN NOW AND AGA. IT’S WHAT WE THE JOURNALISM TRA LL AN ETHIL DILEMMA.ERIC SPZNAGEL: YOU PLAY A CHARACTER ON PARENTHOOD NAMED SARAH BRAVERMAN. HOW DO FEEL TO HAVE THE MOST PRETENT LAST NAME THE HISTORY OF TELEVISN?LREN GRAHAM: I KNOW, RIGHT? IT SOUNDS LIKE BRAGGG. THE BRAVERMANS. BRAVER MEN. IT’S A NAME THAT SAYS, “WE’RE BRAVER THAN YOUR FAY.”DO SHE FIGHT CRIME WH HER BT PAL, JOHNNY B. COURAGEO?THE LAST TIME I DID A CHARACTER LIKE THAT—WH A NAME THAT MA FEEL IMPOSSIBLE TO FILL HER SHO—WAS MOLLY DAVENPORT (OM THE 1998 S CONRAD BLOOM). SHE JT SOUND LIKE AN OLD-TIMEY REPORTER ON THE BEAT, WH A HAT THAT SAID PRESS.I NEVER SAW THE SHOW. WAS SHE A REPORTER?I DON’T REMEMBER. PROBABLY NOT. NONE OF MY CHARACTERS HAVE REALLY HAD JOBS.SERLY? I KNOW YOU’VE PLAYED A LOT OF MOMS, BUT NEVER A CHARACTER WH AN E?WELL, LORELAI GILMORE RAN AN N, WHICH BASILLY MEANT THAT FOR SEVEN YEARS I HAND KEYS TO DAY PLAYERS WHO WERE RRYG LUGGAGE. THAT IS WHAT PEOPLE WHO N HOTELS DO. I ALSO ANSWERED THE PHONE. AND OCSNALLY I TEND TO PEOPLE LIKE NORMAN MAILER THE DG ROOM. BUT OTHER THAN THAT, I’VE DONE MOSTLY STAY-AT-HOME MOMS.MOST POPULARWH MATRO, LEONARD BERNSTE’S LEGACY AND LOV FALLY H THE BIG SCREENBY REBEC FORD25 PERFECT TV EPISOS FROM THE LAST 25 YEARSBY HILLARY BISTHE BOOK OF CLARENCE IS A BOMBASTIC JOURNEY BACK TO THE BIBLIL ERABY REBEC FORDON THIS SEASON OF PARENTHOOD, YOU CHARACTER IS VOLVED A LOVE TRIANGLE WH BILLY BALDW AND THE GAY GUY NAMED J OM TE BLOOD. WHO ARE YOU ROOTG FOR?I’M NOT TAKG SIS. I DON’T KNOW THAT EHER OF THEM ARE THE ANSWER. IT’S MORE AN EXPRSN OF HOPE SARAH’S LIFE. LAST YEAR SHE ULDN’T GET A BREAK. SHE HAD A NICE THG GOG WH THAT CUTE ENGLISH TEACHER, JASON RTER, BUT NOW HE’S GONE. APPARENTLY HE LEFT HER TO BEE A TERRORIST.YOU MEAN ON THE EVENT ? ISN’T THAT AN ENTIRELY DIFFERENT SHOW?OH NO, ’S ALL NNECTED. ALL TV SHOWS ARE BASILLY PART OF THE SAME STORYLE.AH, I GET YOU. THERE WAS A CHARACTER NAMED SOOKIE ON GILMORE GIRLS AND NOW THERE’S A SOOKIE ON TE BLOOD. ARE THEY THE SAME PERSON?NO, NO, NO. THAT’S A DIFFERENT SOOKIE. OUR SOOKIE IS FOR SOME REASON BEG LLED MOLLY NOW. SHE’S ON A CBS SHOW (LLED MIKE & MOLLY), AND I DON’T KNOW WHAT SHE’S DOG WH THAT GUY MIKE. HE IS NOT OM STARS HOLLOW AND I’M JT REALLY NFED BY THE WHOLE THG. MAYBE ’S THE WNS PROTECTN PROGRAM? BUT SHE’S ON BILLBOARDS EVERYWHERE, SO THAT OBVLY DIDN’T WORK.WHEN YOU HEARD THAT BILLY BALDW WAS GOG TO BE YOUR LOVE TERT, DID YOU HAVE TO THK FOR A MOMENT, “HOLD ON, IS HE ONE OF THE CRAZY BALDW BROTHERS?”NO, I WAS EXCED. (PARENTHOOD -STAR) PETER KRSE WORKED WH HIM ON DIRTY SEXY MONEY AND HE REALLY ENJOYED WORKG WH HIM. ALSO, THERE AREN’T MANY ACTORS OUT THERE WHO ARE TALLER THAN ME. SO WE HAD TO PICK OM A SMALL LIST.YOU’RE ONLY, WHAT, 5’ 9”, 5’ 10”? AND YOU STILL HAVE A HARD TIME FDG ACTORS WHO N DO A SCENE WH YOU AT EYE LEVEL?I’M 5’ 9”, AND Y, ’S BEEN DIFFICULT. I’M PRETTY SURE WE WENT THROUGH ALL THE TALL GUYS ON GILMORE GIRLS. I DATED ALL OF THEM. I SAW JON HAMM AT THE EMMI THE OTHER DAY, AND I WAS LIKE, “YOU KNOW YOU OWE ALL TO ME.” HE PLAYED THE MOST THANKLS BOYIEND ON GILMORE GIRLS, A DATE THAT NEVER REALLY HAPPENS. AND I REMEMBER THKG AT THE TIME, “WHAT IS THIS GEO TALL GUY DOG WHOUT HIS OWN TV SHOW?”AFTER THGS DIDN’T WORK OUT WH LORELAI, HE WENT BACK TIME TO THE 60S AND BEME AN ALHOLIC WHO WORKS ADVERTISG.THAT’S RIGHT. AND HE REALLY CHEATS ON HIS WIFE. LORELAI MT’VE WRECKED HIM. HE’S STILL HEARTBROKEN.I’M STARTG TO LOVE THIS CRAZY THEORY OF YOURS.IT REALLY DO MAKE SENSE, DON’T ?NOT AT ALL, BUT YOU’VE CHARMED ME TO BELIEVG . I’VE GOT A IEND NAMED NANCY WHO HAS A SIAR THEORY. SHE NEVER SAW SEFELD BEE SHE REF TO WATCH ANYTHG WH JASON ALEXANR AFTER HE TRIED TO RAPE JULIA ROBERTS PRETTY WOMAN.ARE YOU SER?THAT’S 100 PERCENT TE.MOST POPULARWH MATRO, LEONARD BERNSTE’S LEGACY AND LOV FALLY H THE BIG SCREENBY REBEC FORD25 PERFECT TV EPISOS FROM THE LAST 25 YEARSBY HILLARY BISTHE BOOK OF CLARENCE IS A BOMBASTIC JOURNEY BACK TO THE BIBLIL ERABY REBEC FORDBUT HE DIDN’T REALLY TRY TO RAPE HER, DID HE? HE TUGGED ON HER SKIRT A LTLE, RIGHT? IT WASN’T THAT BAD. OR AM I REMEMBERG WRONG?I DON’T THK THAT’S THE BT ARGUMENT AGAST BOYTTG JASON ALEXANR. A BETTER ARGUMENT WOULD BE “HE WAS AN ACTOR PLAYG A ROLE, AND NONE OF WAS REAL.”THAT TOO, SURE. THE GOOD NEWS IS THAT JULIA HAS BEEN TRAVELG TO INDIA AND ITALY LATELY, SO I THK SHE’S O.K.YOU PLAYED JERRY’S GIRLIEND ON AN EPISO OF SEFELD. DID JASON ALEXANR TRY TO RAPE YOU?(LGHS.) UM, NO.SO MY IEND’S THEORY IS PROBABLY RRECT.IT WOULD SEEM SO, Y.SO HERE’S MY DILEMMA, LREN. I’M NTRACTUALLY OBLIGATED TO ASK YOU ABOUT PARENTHOOD. BUT HONTLY, ALL I WANT TO DO IS TALK ABOUT BAD SANTA.I’M FE WH THAT.IT’S NOT PATHETIC TO TALK ABOUT A MOVIE THAT ME OUT SEVEN YEARS AGO?NOT AT ALL. I LOVED BEG THAT MOVIE. I DON’T THK I’VE WORN A LEATHER RSET SCE. I N STILL REMEMBER HOW TERRIFIED I WAS AT THE BAD SANTA DN. I HAD TO HUMP A CHAIR.I’M SORRY, SAY THAT AGA?I HUMPED A CHAIR. (LGHS.) AMONG OTHER THGS. I HAD TO DO BASILLY EVERYTHG THAT MY CHARACTER DO. AND A LOT OF IS VERY... VISUAL. THE SCRIPT READS PRETTY DARK. AND IF HAND’T BEEN DONE SO WELL, ULD’VE BEEN MUCH CREEPIER. I KNOW SOME PEOPLE FD CREEPY ANYWAY, BUT I FD VERY FUNNY AND SWEET. AND I THOUGHT BILLY WAS LIGHTFUL. IT STILL SERV TO EMBARRASS MY FATHER TO THIS DAY.DO BAD SANTA E UP A LOT NVERSATN WH YOUR DAD?NOT REALLY, NO. THE PERSON I’M MOST NCERNED ABOUT HIDG OM IS MY 90-YEAR-OLD GRANDMOTHER, WHO IS EXTREMELY NSERVATIVE. GILMORE GIRLS WAS A NICE SHOW FOR HER FOR THE MOST PART, ALTHOUGH SHE FOUND LORELAI A LTLE TOO LOOSE.BETWEEN SARAH BRAVERMAN AND LORELAI GILMORE, WHICH OF THEM IS MORE LIKELY TO HAVE SEX A R WH A HALF-DNK SANTA?LORELAI! WELL, WA... GOD, ’S A REAL TOSS-UP, ISN’T ? CSE NEHER OF THOSE GIRLS WERE TOO LUCKY LOVE. I THK WH LORELAI WOULD BE TOO RISKY. SHE’S A SMALL TOWN, AND THERE ARE TOO MANY PEOPLE WHO ULD FD OUT ABOUT , OR EVEN WALK BY WHEN SHE’S THE MIDDLE OF . MISS PATTY AND BABETTE DELL WOULD GOSSIP TO EVERYBODY. SO YEAH, PROBABLY SARAH BRAVERMAN.GILMORE GIRLS WAS A NON-STOP BARRAGE OF POP CULTURE NON-SEQUURS. I THK WE SHOULD TRY A SIAR APPROACH WH THIS TERVIEW.O.K. HAVEN’T I DONE THAT ALREADY?I’LL ASK SOME RAPID-FIRE, NON-SEQUUR QUTNS, AND YOU ANSWER AS QUICKLY AS YOU N. READY?DO !AVATAR. SHOULD WE WATCH A SEND TIME?I HAVEN’T WATCHED A FIRST TIME. THE BLUE PEOPLE SRED ME.CAN BLD PEOPLE SEE THEIR DREAMS?UM, WOW. I DON’T— THE ARE REALLY PHILOSOPHIL QUTNS MORE THAN RAPID-FIRE POP CULTURE QUTNS.MOST POPULARWH MATRO, LEONARD BERNSTE’S LEGACY AND LOV FALLY H THE BIG SCREENBY REBEC FORD25 PERFECT TV EPISOS FROM THE LAST 25 YEARSBY HILLARY BISTHE BOOK OF CLARENCE IS A BOMBASTIC JOURNEY BACK TO THE BIBLIL ERABY REBEC FORDSARAH PAL: CRAZY OR SUPER CRAZY?OH GOD. I’M A DEMOCRAT.HAVE YOU EVER PAID FOR ANYTHG ENTIRELY CHANGE?Y. THE NEW YORK CY SUBWAY. BELIEVE ME, THEY’RE NOT HAPPY ABOUT .THE GULF SPILL: WHERE’D ALL THE OIL GO?JT BIEBER’S HAIR?ARE PEOPLE WH OUTIE BELLYBUTTONS TRSILLY LS TSTWORTHY THAN NI?NO, BUT THEIR PARENTS ARE. HOW DID THEY LET THAT HAPPEN? THEY SHOULD BE ASHAMED.ASI OM JON STEWART, WHICH DAILY SHOW RRPONNT WOULD YOU LET GET TO THIRD BASE ON THE FIRST DATE?I’M IENDS WH AASIF MANDVI. DO THAT UNT?WHAT’S YOUR FAVORE CURSE WORD? AND PLEASE E A SENTENCE THAT ULD HAVE APPEARED A GILMORE GIRLS SCRIPT.YOU’RE GOG TO GET ME TROUBLE. I N’T DO THAT. I WILL TRMATIZE THE CHILDREN.HOW ABOUT PARENTHOOD?IT’D BE SOMETHG LIKE... OH J, I THK I’M TOO CATHOLIC TO DO THIS.HERE’S A QUTN YOU’RE PROBABLY SICK OF ANSWERG: WILL THERE BE A GILMORE GIRLS MOVIE?IT MIGHT. WHAT’S FUNNY TO ME IS THAT ALL THE YEARS, NO ONE EVER TALKED ABOUT EXCEPT THE FANS. BUT NOW PEOPLE WH POWER, PEOPLE WHO ULD ACTUALLY MAKE HAPPEN, ARE TALKG ABOUT . I THK ULD BE GOOD, BUT I WONR IF WE’VE WAED TOO LONG. I DON’T WANT TO BE WALKG AROUND THE TOWN SQUARE WH A NE.I HAVE FOUR REASONS WHY MIGHT BE A TERRIBLE IA: SEX. AND. THE. CY.HEY, E ON, I LIKED THOSE MOVI! I JT DON’T KNOW THAT A TV SHOW MANDS A MOVIE ENDG.HOW WOULD A GILMORE GIRLS MOVIE BE LS AWFUL THAN SEX AND THE CY 2? THE GALS WOULDN’T TAKE A TRIP TO ABU DHABI, I ASSUME. BUT OTHERWISE, WHAT KOOKY MISADVENTUR AWA THEM ON THE BIG SCREEN?IT’S HARD TO SAY BEE THE SHOW WAS NEVER VERY PLOT DRIVEN. THAT IS WHAT MIGHT BE UNVERED A TWO-HOUR MOVIE. YOU’D BE LIKE, “WA A MUTE, THEY JT TALK AND MAKE FUN OF THGS. THIS IS A TERRIBLE MOVIE.”IT MIGHT STILL BE A H, IF ’S DONE RIGHT. THE GILMORE GIRLS MOVIE WILL BE A HARD-R, Y?IF ’S A HORROR MOVIE, THEN ABSOLUTELY. BEE LORELAI IS OBVLY A KILLER, AND RORY IS HER ACPLICE.AND WE’VE ALL SPECTED THAT HER BOYIEND, LE OR WHATEVER, IS TO THE DIRTY STUFF.OH GOD.WHAT’S LE’S SECRET FETISH? AUTOEROTIC ASPHYXIATN?STOP ! (LGHS.) YOU’RE TRYG SO HARD TO GET ME TO ALIENATE EVERY TEENAGE DVD-BUYG GIRL OUT THERE. I’M NOT GOG THERE.ONE OF YOUR FIRST PAYG GIGS WAS DRSG LIKE STRYKER THE DOG, THE MAST FOR THE 1994 AMERI’S WORLD CUP SOCCER TEAM. HOW WAS YOUR MAST BETTER THAN OTHER MASTS?I NEVER PHONED . I ACTUALLY SED UNRNEATH MY GIANT FOAM HEAD FOR EVERY PICTURE, UNTIL THREE-QUARTERS OF THE WAY THROUGH THE DAY WHEN I REALIZED THAT NO ONE ULD SEE ME SG. BUT ISN’T THAT THE BETY OF ? NO ONE N SEE SE ON THE SI, N THEY?MOST POPULARWH MATRO, LEONARD BERNSTE’S LEGACY AND LOV FALLY H THE BIG SCREENBY REBEC FORD25 PERFECT TV EPISOS FROM THE LAST 25 YEARSBY HILLARY BISTHE BOOK OF CLARENCE IS A BOMBASTIC JOURNEY BACK TO THE BIBLIL ERABY REBEC FORDRECENTLY, DONALD DUCK WAS ACCED OF FONDLG A GUT AT DISNEY WORLD. THERE’S NO EASY WAY TO ASK THIS, BUT NEEDS TO BE ADDRSED. LREN, DID YOU EVER FONDLE ANYONE AS STRYKER?OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD!IT’S TIME TO E CLEAN, LREN. THIS IS VANY FAIR. IT’S WHAT WE DO. YOU DIDN’T THK THIS TERVIEW WAS JT ABOUT PROMOTG YOUR SHOW, WAS ?O.K., O.K., FAIR ENOUGH. I THK I TRIED TO FONDLE SOMEONE, BUT MY GIANT HANDS WOULD ONLY ALLOW ME TO HUG THEM WARMLY AS A GOOD IEND.THAT’S THE GLORY OF THE BIG FOAM HANDS. IT’S EASY TO “ACCINTALLY” GET ISKY WHOUT SEEMG TOO PERVY.YOU DO REALIZE THIS WAS JT A TWO-DAY JOB, RIGHT? IT’S NOT SOMETHG I DID EVERY SUMMER AFTER LLEGE.JT TELL ME THIS. DID YOU HAVE TO HUMP A CHAIR FOR YOUR DN?NO, NOT AT ALL. I JT HAD TO BE TALL ENOUGH TO F THE STUME. IF YOU WEREN’T THE RIGHT HEIGHT, YOUR HEAD WOULD BE TOO HEAVY FOR YOUR BODY AND YOU’D FALL OVER. THE JOB GAVE ME SYMPATHY FOR PEOPLE WHO PLAY DISNEY CHARACTERS. I REALLY KNOW WHAT ’S LIKE THOSE STUM. THEY’RE SUFFERG FOR THEIR ART.IT ULD BE WORSE. A LOT OF ACTORS HAVE MUCH WORSE JOBS.ARE YOU KIDDG ME? NAME ONE!THE PORN DTRY.ALRIGHT, FE, YOU W. BUT AS FAR AS ROTTEN ACTG JOBS GO, BEG A MAST A CLOSE SEND.ERIC SPZNAGEL
And also, Marcia told me at the Out 100 party that she has a gay uncle, she went to Juilliard where everyone is gay, and she lghgly add, Maybe Ill even turn gay myself.