Can Someone Be Homosexual and Not Gay? | Psychology Today

Contents:

• I LIKE GUYS BUT I DON’T WANT TO BE GAY. HOW DO I STOP BEG GAY?
• CAN SOMEONE BE HOMOSEXUAL AND NOT GAY?
• FLORIDA ERNOR SIGNS NTROVERSIAL 'DON'T SAY GAY' BILL TO LAW
• HOW TO KNOW IF YOU ARE GAY
• AS LONG AS BALLS DON'T TOUCH , IT'S NOT GAY.
• HERE'S WHAT FLORIDA'S 'DON'T SAY GAY' BILL WOULD DO AND WHAT WOULDN'T DO
• WHAT DO ‘DON’T SAY GAY’ ACTUALLY SAY?

I LIKE GUYS BUT I DON’T WANT TO BE GAY. HOW DO I STOP BEG GAY?

I like guys but I don’t want to be gay. How do I stop beg gay?

You don’t need to be certa you are gay before talkg to someone or attendg an LGBTQ+ meetg. I am a gay male. I have been out nearly 7 years now (age 16, sophomore year of HS).

CAN SOMEONE BE HOMOSEXUAL AND NOT GAY?

That week I told my iends and fay I was gay. It is very homogeneo/ hetero-normative and beg a tholic stutn is not the easit environment for queer stunts. So when we therapists are nonted wh male clients, often married on, who e to wh ep nflicts about their sexual attractn to other men, we often fd that they are willg to e the word “homosexual, ” but chew the “gay” label.

FLORIDA ERNOR SIGNS NTROVERSIAL 'DON'T SAY GAY' BILL TO LAW

Bee “gay” impli an embracg of the gay liftyle — gay bars, gay pri paras, perhaps multiple sex partners, or even anonymo sex. Unfortunately, much of our natn’s polics have long exacerbated the problem as well, shamg and vilifyg homosexualy, leadg legns of men stgglg wh sexual inty to ternalize their homophobia.

For example, gay men the Mormon fah are moral nflict.

Durg the’90s, I beme a “gay-affirmative therapist. I warned them of the pfalls of keepg their sexual orientatn secret: a life of creased prsn, pursug a secret life the gay unrground wh the danger of beg ught, how attemptg to supprs urg n often e them to bee even more obssed wh them.

HOW TO KNOW IF YOU ARE GAY

Beg a gay man, I was tryg to brg them to where I was at. Durg this time, a man don’t see himself as gay, only homosexual.

AS LONG AS BALLS DON'T TOUCH , IT'S NOT GAY.

The term gay is too affirmative, and they are not ready to accept . I have treated many men who are of Mormon, Orthodox Jewish, Catholic, and other religns who thk of homosexualy as a pathology. Their pa is excciatg, but I honor their bravery riskg losg everythg to ensure they have a qualy life as a gay man.

HERE'S WHAT FLORIDA'S 'DON'T SAY GAY' BILL WOULD DO AND WHAT WOULDN'T DO

They may need, om time to time, to seek further therapy, but wh the right therapist, one who has thoroughly unrstood the dangers of such practic of “reparative therapy” which the therapist seeks to change the client’s sexual inty om gay to straight. Bee the labels “homosexual” or “gay” rry such a stigma, some of the men seek help for their “sex addictn” and see their homosexualy as an actg out of same-sex urg. Beg homosexual, gay, or havg same-sex attractn is not sex addictn, and should never be treated as such.

Hetero-Emotnal and Homosexual.

I thk of them as beg hetero-emotnal homosexuals. Homophobia is discrimatn, fear, or hatred of gay (and often bisexual) people. Both dividuals or groups n be homophobic and n create hostile environments.

WHAT DO ‘DON’T SAY GAY’ ACTUALLY SAY?

Luckily, you n choose not to be homophobic.

If you are makg a nsc cisn to stop beg homophobic, then you may have already noticed some feelgs or actns that trouble you or others. Wre down your feelgs or what actns trigger certa feelgs of homophobia. Once you have wrten down the specific feelgs that make have homophobic feelgs, is time to analyze why you feel this way.

When you are reflectg on your feelgs, nsir where your homophobia origated. ”Do my parents feel homophobic and have their views fluenced me?