Meet the Gay Mormon Men (and Their Wiv) Beechg SCOTUS to Save ‘Tradnal’ Marriage - TPM – Talkg Pots Memo

Contents:

• JOSH WEED, FAMO MARRIED GAY MORMON ANNOUNC DIVORCE, APOLOGIZ TO LGBTQ MUNY
• MARRIED. GAY. AND MORMON. (PART 1)
• GAY, MORMON AND HAPPILY MARRIED WH CHILDREN
• I'M A GAY MORMON WHO'S BEEN HAPPILY MARRIED FOR 10 YEARS
• THE CHALLENGE OF BEG GAY, MARRIED, AND MORMON
• MARRIED. GAY. AND MORMON. (PART 2)
• HEATHER GAY’S EX-HBAND LEGALLY TRAMARKED THE TERM ‘MORMON ROYALTY’ AFTER THE ‘RHOSLC’ STAR REVEALED HER FAY LEAGE
• I'M A GAY MARRIED MORMON THE CLOSET
• MORMON AND GAY: HOW IT’S GOG
• GAY MORMON WHO BEME FAMO FOR MIXED-ORIENTATN MARRIAGE IS DIVORCG HIS WIFE
• MORMON AND GAY: CHURCH SAYS YOU N BE BOTH
• MEET THE GAY MORMON MEN (AND THEIR WIV) BEECHG SCOTUS TO SAVE ‘TRADNAL’ MARRIAGE
• RISG NUMBERS OF YOUNG ADULT MORMONS THE US ARE GAY, LBIAN OR BISEXUAL
• MORMON CHURCH AND GAY RIGHTS
• POLICY CHANG ANNOUNCED FOR MEMBERS GAY MARRIAG, CHILDREN OF LGBT PARENTS

JOSH WEED, FAMO MARRIED GAY MORMON ANNOUNC DIVORCE, APOLOGIZ TO LGBTQ MUNY

He said, “There was somethg about me that always felt bad for beg gay or that I was gog to live a Plan B life bee I wasn’t strong enough to be straight. ET/PTThis is where a seemgly normal fay turns to a social experiment that challeng what means to be a fahful member of the Mormon church, what means to be gay and live a heterosexual 's announcement has also touched off a bate among other gay Mormons, who see The Church Of Latter Day Sats slowly evolvg on the issue of homosexualy. Some worry that this unorthodox uple is sendg a dangero msage to other fai alg wh gay loved on that livg a "straight" liftyle is OutJosh and Lrel have known each other sce they were 4 years old.

Josh's blog post quickly went viral -- currently has over 3, 700 ments and has been re-posted by other blogs -- and set off a firtorm of bate wh both the Mormon church and the gay muny. Bee Josh has a private practice as a licensed marriage and fay therapist associate, many crics of his liftyle are ncern that he is tryg to "change" gay men and nvce them that a "straight" liftyle is matas he do not believe tryg to change someone's sexual orientatn, and said he believ tryg to do so n be very damagg.

" Josh John Dehl, a fellow Mormon who studi and wr about members of his relign who are facg nflicts and qutns about their fah, warns that the Weeds' story is harmg others stgglg wh homosexualy. "Dehl, who produc a popular podst that shar stori about Mormons stgglg wh issu of fah, said he has received emails om mothers who have asked their gay sons why they n't live like Josh.

MARRIED. GAY. AND MORMON. (PART 1)

"Usg relign or spirualy as a way to manage your sexual orientatn, by beg extra righteo, or extra fahful, as a way to sort of supprs those feelgs, or ntrol yourself, is the most damagg way to pe wh your same-sex attractn, " he Gorrge said he is livg proof that beg gay and attemptg to marry and live a heterosexual liftyle leads to heartbreak.

The Utah man said he was married for 25 years to a woman, raised four children, and was even a member of Evergreen Internatnal, a group that worked to "nvert" Mormons who are gay. ""Evolvg" Mormon ChurchThe Weeds story at a time when many believe the Mormon church is slowly evolvg to be more acceptg of the homosexual recently, church lears did not accept the notn that someone uld be gay and still be a fahful member of the church. " Many Mormon lears also enuraged "reparative therapy, " a procs by which patients received an electric shock when shown homosexual after the bisg battle 2008 over California's Proposn 8, and plats om wh the church that Mormons were viewed as too tolerant, church learship has begun to soften s stance.

GAY, MORMON AND HAPPILY MARRIED WH CHILDREN

The church now says simply beg gay is no longer nsired a s, though actg on those feelgs still is, as is any sexual relatnship outsi of a tradnal heterosexual Mormon activists say church lears have begun speakg wh them about gay issu. ""I have no doubt my md the next 30, 50 or 100 years that legally married gay men and women are gog to be accepted to the church at a mimum to be able to serve llgs and to be able to participate and worship along si straight members of the church, " he A Lie?

I'M A GAY MORMON WHO'S BEEN HAPPILY MARRIED FOR 10 YEARS

When I say I am gay or homosexual or same-sex attracted (and I e the terms terchangeably, which is a personal cisn) I refer specifilly to sexual orientatn. It has epened my iendships and enhanced my teractns, and has also helped me to feel more accepted by others as allows others the opportuny to choose to accept me for who I really did you know you were gay? Th, I believe that to live my life this way is beg te to myself, and to go down any other path would be egregly thentic and all gay people who are LDS or Christian choose to marry people of the oppose genr?

I want to make very clear that while I have found a path that brgs me profound joy and that is the right path for me, I don't endorse this as the only path for somebody who is gay and relig. I will never, ever judge somebody else's path as beg "rrect" and I know many people who have chosen different paths than you know and love somebody who is gay and LDS (or Christian), your job is to love and nothg more. That I might be lled Satanic, or told that I am the epome of the reason I do this is bee I love you, whoever you are, and I want to share my suatn so that you n know further tth: I am gay.

THE CHALLENGE OF BEG GAY, MARRIED, AND MORMON

The Challenge of Beg Gay, Married, and MormonNew Church l have exacerbated members' anxieti over the place of same-sex upl and their children the Latter-day Sat Bowmer / APOn November 5, the First Princy of the Church of J Christ of Latter-day Sats quietly changed a handbook that is available only to Church lears. When the new polici were leaked, there was an immediate outcry om Latter-day Sats on social media, cludg those who accept the Church’s tegorizatn of homosexual behavr as s, but who neverthels feel the new l punished children for their parents’ choic.

The new regulatns, tend to prevent the normalizatn of same-sex fai Church settgs, reprent a signifint shift how gay and lbian Mormons teract wh other Church members. Many LGBT Mormons accept the Church’s high valuatn of marriage and children, yet labelg same-sex marriage as apostasy mak a lifetime, legally bdg mment between gays or lbians a more ser s than gay promiscuy.

The distctn between doctre and policy is not always sharp, however, and spe an assumptn that the hight Church lears are not fallible, some Church members may feel is disloyal to pot out any potential, gay and lbian Mormons, married or not, are upset; extend fai of LGBT Latter-day Sats are upset; some vout members are upset at polici they perceived as dranian or doctrally problematic; and nservative Mormons are upset wh fellow ngregants who qutned the wisdom of the chang or the spiratn of lears.

MARRIED. GAY. AND MORMON. (PART 2)

In November 2015, the LDS church’s msage of clivens and love towards LDS LGBTQ members fell flat when lears released a policy change that many members—gay and straight alike—found alarmgly discrimatory. For children of gay upl there would be no baby blsg, no baptism at eight years old, no ordatn to the prithood at age twelve for boys, and no temple attendance for eher boys or girls age twelve and up. They mourned for a spirual inty rooted somethg beyond repeated disavowals and aversn, and yearned to be regnized as full members whether or not they chose to live an actively gay liftyle.

After the policy change they termed they were gog to be the bt gay uple they uld be, and hoped to help the dwdlg numbers of active LDS LGBTQ members along the way. Wh a st that featur fan-favore characters such as Meredh Marks, Lisa Barlow, and Heather Gay, The Real Hoewiv of Salt Lake Cy has quickly bee one of the most popular realy shows on televisn.

” Acrdg to Monsters & Crics, the label started gag promence amongst Gay’s ner circle thanks to her fay’s associatn wh the famed film producer Howard Hugh. And we have this enormo secret between that our kids are tryg to figure out -- that their dad is gay and this is the reason for the dull ache that is so pervasive our home, spe the perky Mormonspeak at the breakfast table. You uld not go out and fd a lover, or challenge the church, or announce that you are gay, or even enter to timate dialogue wh anyone about how you feel.

HEATHER GAY’S EX-HBAND LEGALLY TRAMARKED THE TERM ‘MORMON ROYALTY’ AFTER THE ‘RHOSLC’ STAR REVEALED HER FAY LEAGE

Thk of all the gay young men who now stand at the same precipice where you once stood, lookg out at the future, thkg of their fay and their church, tryg to make the most passnate, selfls and reasonable cisn. ”A pri flag fli ont of the Salt Lake Temple of The Church of J Christ of Latter-day Sats Frey via Getty ImagIn 2012, Josh Weed wrote a viral blog post which he me out as a gay Mormon who was “very happily” married to a straight woman.

The church also rolved that the children of the upl would not be allowed to be baptized until they were 18, at which pot they would need to move out of their parents’ home and disavow their parents’ relatnship to be nsired for membership the church ma s posn on queer sexualy even clearer 2016, when updated a web page meant to serve as a rource for gay and lbian Mormons and their alli. ” The page shar the stori of Mormons who intify as gay but have pledged to pursue a life of celibacy or who have mted themselv to mixed-orientatn relatnships. I once heard the difference between the groups stated this way and ’s always stuck wh me: sgle Mormons go to bed every night pleadg wh the Lord that they will fall love wh someone tomorrow; gay Mormons go to bed every night pleadg wh the Lord that they will never fall love wh someone.

I'M A GAY MARRIED MORMON THE CLOSET

As a creative director for church public affairs, Rosas was asked to help sign the church’s latt mpaign: a new sectn of s official webse tled “Mormon and Gay. Now he and his wife Elizabeth are featured promently on “Mormon and Gay, ” discsg how they have grown together as the new materials gave them the tools for “a healthy dialogue. As public opn – and scientific unrstandg – on sexualy has shifted wh remarkable speed, many nomatns, cludg Mormon lears, have had to grapple wh a difficult qutn: How do they mata tradnal doctre that homosexual acts are sful, while acceptg and misterg to gay and lbian Mormons who scerely wish to rema part of their church?

MORMON AND GAY: HOW IT’S GOG

Senr church lears ll the new materials “simply an update” om the webpage “Mormons and Gays, ” released 2012 on a doma unaffiliated wh the church’s official webse. Mch Mayne, a proment gay Mormon and blogger, said, “Above and beyond gettg to the ntent of the webse, the URL is absolutely fantastic – ’s an clive statement. While the prev se promently displayed the church’s doctral stance agast homosexual activy on s homepage, the new materials feature the stori of gay members.

“Church Teachgs” is loted on a separate page; roughly 1, 700 words and five vios on “lovg one another” prece the first direct statement that “homosexual activy is a s. Fulmer, who self-intifi as a gay Mormon and is featured on the new webse, said the new materials “give a steppg stone to have more open munitn about this and to te others on how to help and how to rpond to somebody who is gay. Trevor Johnson, a gay man who was raised Mormon but rigned his membership after gettg engaged, said, “When I first me out, the most damagg thg was feelg like people didn’t believe me that I was attracted to men.

GAY MORMON WHO BEME FAMO FOR MIXED-ORIENTATN MARRIAGE IS DIVORCG HIS WIFE

Keetch both say they have bee more ted on homosexualy through their volvement producg the materials — a two-year procs which volved the church learship, LGBT advocy groups and mental health profsnals.

While the church once regard homosexualy as “curable” and enuraged members to be “forced” to heterosexual marriag, the church has backed off of this remendatn. In a church found on the ncept of ntual revelatn, many members qutn what those “future updat” uld be — cludg whether the church will revoke s ntroversial policy on the children of gay parents.

Prr to 1950Homosexualy regard by church as “s that dare not speak s name” 1952“Homosexualy” is ed publicly by a senr church lear for the first time, lled an “abomatn” parable to masturbatn and btialy1969Homosexualy regard as “curable” by a senr church lear; beg “forced” to heterosexual relatnships is enuraged 1976Church-sponsored Brigham Young Universy nducts electroshock therapy for 14 gay Mormons1978-81Church fac public backlash for opposg Equal Rights Amendment, argug uld extend legal protectn to “lbian and homosexual marriag” 1990sLears beg referrg to homosexualy as same-genr attractn, acknowledgg the realy of sexual attractn while nmng the s of actg on those feelgs 2008-09Church attempts to balance “relig liberty and nondiscrimatn” polil advocy, mpaigng agast legalizatn of gay marriage California and supportg a nondiscrimatn ordance Salt Lake Cy2012Church “gay” for the first time public munitns. In a seri of vios on “Mormons and Gays, ” lears ask members to “fd mon ground” while “beg te to relig beliefs”2015“Handbook of Instctn” for church lears is updated wh a new policy barrg children of same-sex upl om church baby blsgs and baptism. Same-sex marriage is regard as apostasy and grounds for exmunitn2016Church lnch new “Mormon and Gay” sectn on s official webse, which Mormon lears ll for creased dialogue about homosexualy, and gay Mormons share their experienc as active, celibate church members.

MORMON AND GAY: CHURCH SAYS YOU N BE BOTH

But none of the top church lears ordaed to the hight level of the prithood have mented on the new materials, somethg Mayne said is ditive of a wars towards a perceived “gay agenda” at the hight levels of the church. He hop the church’s top learship will speak wh homosexual married upl to unrstand that “a gay uple is really two Mormon people hopg to e as close as possible to everythg that we value and hold ar as a relign: fai, mted relatnships, lovg one another. This exchange reveals the pable tensn faced by a church attemptg to both nmn same-sex marriage and clu gay members — all while navigatg a ti of creasgly antagonistic public opn.

At issue the pendg Supreme Court lg is whether the 14th Amendment, ratified 1868 to guarantee equal protectns, bans stat om treatg gay and straight upl differently. Ctng the jtic agast lg favor of gay marriage, the brief Danny and his wife pned their nam to stat: “Rather than expand liberty, such a judgment would not only ignore the eply fulfillg marriag between same-sex-attracted men and women and their spo, but would also nstutnally mean such marriag and fai.

Weed beme the subject of ternatnal fascatn when he published a blog post 2012: “Not only am I homosexual, but I’m also a vout and believg Mormon…I’m very happily married to a woman, and have been for ten years now.

MEET THE GAY MORMON MEN (AND THEIR WIV) BEECHG SCOTUS TO SAVE ‘TRADNAL’ MARRIAGE

Wrten as an FAQ, the post revealed Weed’s g-out story: how his father, a lear the church, took the news of his 13-year-old son beg homosexual remarkably well, and how Josh’s wife Lolly, a childhood iend, did too. Anticipatg his dience’s ep skepticism—the skepticism I and nearly everyone who hears of openly gay men married to women shar—he nclud: “All of the thgs are te, whether your md is allowg you to believe them or not.

In 2014, after stts as a filmmaker and the producer and host of the public rad show Now Queer This, Williams was named executive director of Equaly Utah, the leadg gay rights anizatn the state. ” If your strategy is to get your fay and iends to accept who you are whout really supportg who you are, he adds, paraphrasg gay activist and thor Dan Savage, “I would not say that gets better.

RISG NUMBERS OF YOUNG ADULT MORMONS THE US ARE GAY, LBIAN OR BISEXUAL

Kchen attracted natnal attentn when he, his partner and two other upl sued Utah for the right to marry, leadg a feral judge to overturn the state’s 10-year antigay marriage law December 2013. When Amendment 3 appeared on the ballot 2004—the measure that ma state law to fe marriage as beg between one man and one woman, the same law for which Derek Kchen later sued the state—Danny voted agast , favor of gay rights.

When he backslis to gay porn, Danny repents, prays, and reads the scriptur—the Bible, the Book of Mormon, and other revelatns by Joseph Smh, who claimed God stcted that marriage should be between a man and several women. When I prsed them on why they so vehemently opposed gay marriage, Danny leaned on talkg pots: Constutnally legalized gay marriage would force bs to ter to gay upl, regardls of relig belief; private relig schools like BYU would lose tax-ee stat; Danny’s own marriage would feel meangls, tramplg on his nstutnal rights. It’s notable this fdg is nearly double the 10% that Benjam Knoll and I found among lennials the 2016 Next Mormons Survey (which broke down to 7% bisexual, 2% gay or lbian and 1% “other”).

MORMON CHURCH AND GAY RIGHTS

Mormons Buildg Bridg is a muny of Latter-day Sats dited to nveyg love and acceptance to all those who intify as LGBTQI and those who experience same-sex attractn or genr Fay Fellowship is a service and support group for Mormons wh gay and lbian fay members. People who experience same-sex attractn or intify as gay, lbian, or bisexual n make and keep venants wh God and fully and worthily participate the Church. Intifyg as gay, lbian, or bisexual or experiencg same-sex attractn is not a s and do not prohib one om participatg the Church, holdg llgs, or attendg the temple.

Gee, Utah, to raise money for the ncer treatment of the mother of a gay man the muny, and the Fire Hoe is one of the few venu town that hosts LGBT events. The Church had often fought agast the risg ti of marriage equaly; s members were major fancial backers of 2008's Prop 8 California, which briefly banned same-sex marriage the state before beg more progrsive Church members voiced strong disapproval, Garett, like many Mormons, believed the spirual lears were warmg to gay rights.

POLICY CHANG ANNOUNCED FOR MEMBERS GAY MARRIAG, CHILDREN OF LGBT PARENTS

Its official policy toward homosexualy is that "actg" on one's sire is a s and that same-sex marriage is agast God's, twenty-six, and Garett, twenty-four, have had a long, plited relatnship wh the relign to which they were born. Neher of them associated wh or even knew any Church's official policy toward homosexualy is that "actg" on one's sire is a s and that same-sex marriage is agast God's will.

That night, they met another gay Mormon uple at Olive Garn for a celebratn over pasta and a bottle of whe for Kyle's brother and sister--law, they did not tell their fai.

Garett uld only assume that his parents believed they had one gay son who stayed celibate orr to bt serve his fah, and another who abandoned relign to have a meangful has never wished to be seen as the good gay son. After the policy was released, Shawn, unable to sleep, sent his thoughts to his wife and two gay children: "How do I rencile wh my fah or Church when is distancg self om my sons and me?