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a{-webk-text-ratn:unrle;text-ratn:unrle;text-ratn-thickns:0.0625rem;text-ratn-lor:her;text-unrle-offset:0.25rem;lor:her;-webk-transn:all 0.3s ease--out;transn:all 0.3s ease--out;} a:hover{lor:#B20B16;text-ratn-lor:borr-lk-body-hover;}</style><div class="css-1cgvs9y exadjwu8"><p>The hills are alive wh the sound of my sexual awakeng.</p></div><style data-emotn="css 1yvxpqj">{marg-bottom:0.625rem;paddg-right:0.3125rem;font-fay:GTWalsheim,Helveti,sans-serif;font-size:0.70003rem;le-height:1;letter-spacg:0.05em;text-transform:upperse;} span{le-height:1.6;}</style><div class="css-1yvxpqj exadjwu7"><style data-emotn="css ku2dj9">{font-style:normal;paddg-right:0.3125rem;font-fay:GTWalsheim,Helveti,sans-serif;font-size:0.70003rem;le-height:1;letter-spacg:0.05em;text-transform:upperse;}</style><addrs class="css-ku2dj9 ehvvd9m2"><style data-emotn="css 6ywij2">{paddg-right:0.3125rem;font-fay:GTWalsheim,Helveti,sans-serif;font-size:0.70003rem;le-height:1;letter-spacg:0.05em;text-transform:upperse;}</style><span class="css-6ywij2 ehvvd9m1">By <style data-emotn="css 5z6rvi">{-webk-text-ratn:unrle;text-ratn:unrle;text-ratn-thickns:0.0625rem;text-ratn-lor:her;text-unrle-offset:0.25rem;lor:her;-webk-transn:all 0.3s ease--out;transn:all 0.3s ease--out;}{lor:#B20B16;text-ratn-lor:borr-lk-body-hover;}</style><a href="/thor/208574/molly-savard/" class="css-5z6rvi e1c1bym14">Molly Savard</a></span><style data-emotn="css w0ebia">{display:le-block;text-transform:upperse;marg-left:0.625rem;}</style><time class="css-w0ebia exadjwu6">Published: Mar 2, 2018</time></addrs></div></div></div></hear><style data-emotn="css k008qs">{display:-webk-box;display:-webk-flex;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;}</style><div class="css-k008qs ewisyje0"><style data-emotn="css 7ce51e">{marg-bottom:0.9375rem;posn:relative;}@media(max-width: 64rem){{max-width:lc(100vw - 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r1wujd">{paddg-right:0.3125rem;lor:#595959;font-fay:GTWalsheim,Helveti,sans-serif;font-size:0.70003rem;le-height:1;letter-spacg:0.05em;text-transform:upperse;}</style><span class="css-r1wujd e6iqd1">Getty Imag</span></figptn></div></div><style data-emotn="css woto36">{font-fay:Charter,Geia,Tim,Serif;font-size:1.1875rem;le-height:1.6;paddg-left:0rem;paddg-right:0rem;posn:relative;}@media(m-width: 48rem){{paddg-left:3.5rem;paddg-right:3.5rem;}}@media(m-width: 48rem) and (max-width: 61.25rem){{max-width:45.25rem;marg-left:to;marg-right:to;}}@media(m-width: 61.25rem){{paddg-left:0rem;paddg-right:0rem;}}@media(m-width: 73.75rem) and (max-width: 100rem){{paddg-left:0rem;paddg-right:0rem;}}@media(m-width: 90rem){{paddg-left:0rem;paddg-right:0rem;}} em{font-style:alic;font-fay:Charter,Geia,Tim,Serif;} strong{font-fay:Charter,Geia,Tim,Serif;font-weight:bold;}{clear:both;ntent:" ";display:block;font-size:0.7rem;le-height:1.5rem;height:0rem;visibily:hidn;}</style><div class="article-body-ntent article-body standard-body-ntent css-woto36 ewisyje7"><style data-emotn="css aeyldl">{font-fay:Charter,Geia,Tim,Serif;font-size:1.1875rem;le-height:1.6;} strong{font-fay:Charter,Geia,Tim,Serif;font-weight:bold;} em{font-style:alic;font-fay:Charter,Geia,Tim,Serif;}</style><p data-no-id="0" class="css-aeyldl et3p2gv0">Dire is a mhy thg, not easily parsed, and rooted experienc that might surprise .</p><p data-no-id="1" class="css-aeyldl et3p2gv0">Growg up, as much as my mother allowed, I spent weekday evengs and weekend afternoons watchg "The Sound of Mic." I sang the soundtrack — theatril gtur clud — up and down our hallway and the backseat durg r ris. While many girls my age were swept up Crella’s night at the ball, I was gallopg through the Atrian untrysi, eagerly votg two hours and 54 mut of afterschool time to nuns and Nazis.</p><p data-no-id="2" class="css-aeyldl et3p2gv0">I’ve loved "The Sound of Mic" sce I was 4 years old, and while I didn’t que grasp the stak of the film at the time, didn’t matter, bee what tly enamored me of the movie was Julie Andrews. I still get chills durg the openg scene, the first time we meet her. The flut flutter and the mic swells as the mera sweeps over the Alps — until ’s jt Andrews, spng eely, sgg geoly, surround by that lh landspe and enveloped by a soarg Rodgers and Hammerste sre. It’s hard to ny there’s somethg tly magic about her this scene — and while may not have registered then, was love at first sight.</p><p data-no-id="3" class="css-aeyldl et3p2gv0">Back then, my unrstandg of why I liked Maria was simple: I liked her assertivens, and her unapologetic pennce, and that she refed to answer to a <a href=" target="_blank" data-vars-ga-outbound-lk=" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Hyperlk" data-vars-ga-ll-to-actn="man’s leral dog whistle" class="body-lk css-5z6rvi et3p2gv0">man’s leral dog whistle</a>. I liked her short hair and high-necked drs, and the scrappy charm that me when she climbed tre them. I liked her voice and that she played guar. I did not like that she end up marryg the Capta — nor did I unrstand what that dislike meant. It was only when I had grown olr and was startg to nsir my sexualy that I revised my affectn for Andrews as Maria, and wonred over that pivotal, time-honored qutn for queer women: "Do I want to be you, or do I want to bone you?"</p><style data-emotn="css 18pb4rg">{borr:0;borr-bottom:th solid black;marg:1.875rem 0;clear:both;}</style><hr data-no-id="4" class="css-18pb4rg et3p2gv0" /><p data-no-id="5" class="css-aeyldl et3p2gv0">Anecdotally, most of n name at least one figure, real or fictnal, who nfounds the blurry boundary between self-intifyg sire — I want to be like you — and objectifyg sire — I want to be wh you. This ambiguy is a mon feelg for queer people, pecially those jt learng to navigate how we intify and where we f , but straight women n experience , too. Platonic "girl csh" are one socially acceptable way for women to exprs sire for each other whout riskg their heterosexualy, and the fort and privilege that brgs. (I’ll also bet many straight men have met other straight men who make them feel a fleetg spark, s source unknown, only to be promptly quashed wh a masculy-affirmg pound-hug — but the feelgs are often ls openly addrsed.)</p><p data-no-id="6" class="css-aeyldl et3p2gv0">While I didn’t have words for what I felt watchg "The Sound of Mic" as a child, I <em>did</em> unrstand that I wanted some of what Andrews as Maria had. She embodied an tonomy and fiance of genr rol that put her squarely outsi the systems to which she should f — the relig orr, motherhood, even tradnal womanhood. She had a ee spir and hunger for adventure that reflected my own cursy about the world. She was at home her oddns, and for much of the movie, she is an outsir. (It’s important to note, though, that her whens giv her plete mobily, allowg her to make the jump om nannyg kids to marryg the man of the hoe.) While Andrews as Maria is undoubtedly feme, she also served as subtle exposure to androgyny, thanks to her arguably butch haircut and boyish appeal. In fact, to many of the other characters, her appearance, habs, and terts make her untegorizable: The nuns n’t ci whether she’s <a href=" target="_blank" data-vars-ga-outbound-lk=" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Hyperlk" data-vars-ga-ll-to-actn="a darlg, a mon, a wave, or a moonbeam" class="body-lk css-5z6rvi et3p2gv0">a darlg, a mon, a wave, or a moonbeam</a>.</p><p data-no-id="7" class="css-aeyldl et3p2gv0">In sence, she’s queer.</p><hr data-no-id="8" class="css-18pb4rg et3p2gv0" /><p data-no-id="9" class="css-aeyldl et3p2gv0">The book "A Problem Like Maria: Genr and Sexualy the Amerin Mil" vot an entire chapter to Andrews as Maria as a mag for lbian intifitn. It nsists, part, of terviews wh women who’d watched "The Sound of Mic" as kids — and who all had the same feelgs for Maria that I did. "No one uld domtite her," one woman says. "In some ways," says another, "I intified wh her…, and some ways I wanted to be the Capta and sweep her off her feet." Watchg the ethereally-l Maria <a href=" target="_blank" data-vars-ga-outbound-lk=" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Hyperlk" data-vars-ga-ll-to-actn="dance the Laendler" class="body-lk css-5z6rvi et3p2gv0">dance the Laendler</a> wh the tuxedo-clad Capta was, ed, the pnacle of nfound boundari. For all of , for most of the movie, Andrews as Maria was a figure of possibily. Later, when she seemgly giv up her eedom to marry the Capta, I and the women terviewed felt disappoted, betrayed even. Once she’s married, she’s no longer herself — or, at the very least, available for to project our longg and cursi onto.</p><p data-no-id="10" class="css-aeyldl et3p2gv0">When I was a ltle olr, I saw Andrews "Victor/Victoria" — a 1982 mil edy that was groundbreakg for s unashamed pictn of queer attractn and love at a time when HIV and AIDS were only barely beg publicly acknowledged. In the film, Andrews plays Victoria Grant, an out-of-work sger who pos as a male drag performer named Victor. The plot would likely not pass today’s lm tt for accurate or thoughtful reprentatn, but s ma attractns for me, like "The Sound of Mic," were the songs and, of urse, Julie Andrews. </p><p data-no-id="11" class="css-aeyldl et3p2gv0">Except this time, she was wearg a su.</p><p data-no-id="12" class="css-aeyldl et3p2gv0">What Maria left to the imagatn, Victor ma palpable. At the time, I don’t thk I’d ever seen a woman drs or act this way: She wears her spenrs, slicked back hair, and outright butchns wh pri. She sc men and women alike, regardls of their sexualy. But bee Victoria is only pretendg to be Victor, there’s also an ongog tensn between her <a href=" target="_blank" data-vars-ga-outbound-lk=" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Hyperlk" data-vars-ga-ll-to-actn="feme slks" class="body-lk css-5z6rvi et3p2gv0">feme slks</a> and <a href=" target="_blank" data-vars-ga-outbound-lk=" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Hyperlk" data-vars-ga-ll-to-actn="mascule swagger" class="body-lk css-5z6rvi et3p2gv0">mascule swagger</a>. She/he liv the space between, habg multiple genrs — and, like Maria, Victor/ia be an object of fable sire.</p><hr data-no-id="13" class="css-18pb4rg et3p2gv0" /><p data-no-id="14" class="css-aeyldl et3p2gv0">Objectively, Julie Andrews is a gay in. She herself has acknowledged this — she once lled "<a href=" data-vars-ga-outbound-lk=" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Hyperlk" data-vars-ga-ll-to-actn="very flatterg" class="body-lk css-5z6rvi et3p2gv0">very flatterg</a>" — and the untls queers I saw at the Hollywood Bowl’s Sound of Mic Sg-A-Long last year would likely agree. Men love her for her mp; women for her haircut, subversive portrayal of womanhood, and abily to fashn DIY outfs out of drap (tly). The fact that Andrews later took a such a genr-exploratory role "Victor/Victoria" is a ttament to her artistic flexibily and open-mdns. Her producg creds speak to her <a href=" target="_blank" data-vars-ga-outbound-lk=" data-vars-ga-ux-element="Hyperlk" data-vars-ga-ll-to-actn="loyalty to the muny" class="body-lk css-5z6rvi et3p2gv0">loyalty to the muny</a>, too: Her Netflix kids’ show "Julie’s Greenroom," released last year, featur a non-bary character.</p><p data-no-id="15" class="css-aeyldl et3p2gv0">But subjectively, Andrews is much more than that. She’s the person to whom I owe my affy for Edwardian fashn, which likely veloped om seeg her "Mary Popps" at an imprsnable age, wh her bodice, buttoned-up shirt, and bowtie. She’s been wh me sce the days I didn’t unrstand Atria’s acquicence to Nazis, or why I was so ptivated by her. She’s still here, when distance and a different lens allow for an explicly queer readg of 4-year-old me’s feelgs — and, turns out, the feelgs of many other women, too.</p><p data-no-id="16" class="css-aeyldl et3p2gv0">For queer people, sire n feel like sticky ground. Many of learn to supprs our sir, to avoid namg them aloud — sometim, we lack the language that’s so easily accsible to others. It’s why cultural figur which we n see ourselv — and why a variety of cultural figur that reprent the vast spectm of human experience — are so important. They offer the eedom, a vehicle, to explore the hazy expans of who we are, who we want to be, and who we want to be wh. For anyone, queer or not, those opportuni are prec. And for this, to me, Julie Andrews is a treasure.</p></div></div><style data-emotn="css 6b9rfj">{display:block;-webk-flex-basis:lc((100vw - lc(20.625rem * 2 - 1rem) - 1rem - 20.625rem) / 2);-ms-flex-preferred-size:lc((100vw - lc(20.625rem * 2 - 1rem) - 1rem - 20.625rem) / 2);flex-basis:lc((100vw - lc(20.625rem * 2 - 1rem) - 1rem - 20.625rem) / 2);-webk-box-flex:0;-webk-flex-grow:0;-ms-flex-posive:0;flex-grow:0;-webk-flex-shrk:0;-ms-flex-negative:0;flex-shrk:0;}@media(max-width: 61.25rem){{display:none;}}</style><div class="no-prt css-6b9rfj ewisyje1"><div><style data-emotn="css 1tuodqg">{width:330px;paddg-left:30px;}</style><div id="ad-article-rail-flt-wrapper" class="vertil-ad css-1tuodqg eqm02p30"><style data-emotn="css w0cuw4">{display:block;posn:-webk-sticky;posn:sticky;top:5rem;}@media(max-width: 61.25rem){{display:none;}}</style><div class="vertilAdSticky css-w0cuw4 eqm02p32"><style data-emotn="css 9fasmy">{m-height:523px;top:5rem;}@media(max-width: 61.25rem){{display:-webk-box;display:-webk-flex;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-webk-flex-directn:lumn;-ms-flex-directn:lumn;flex-directn:lumn;-webk-box-pack:jtify;-webk-jtify-ntent:space-between;jtify-ntent:space-between;}}@media(m-width: 48rem){{m-height:138px;}}@media(max-width: 61.25rem){{ntent:"";display:-webk-box;display:-webk-flex;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;borr-bottom:th solid #E8E8E8;}}</style><div class="standard-article-vertil-ad css-9fasmy eqm02p31"><style data-emotn="css 14b96eg">{m-width:18.75rem;text-align:center;}</style><div id="gpt-ad-vertil-top" class="ad-ntaer css-14b96eg e1hka4w80"></div></div></div></div></div></div></div><div data-teractive="WatchNext-1" class="css-0 e10xr3vp6"><style data-emotn="css 1pqv15d">{marg-bottom:1.875rem;marg-top:1.875rem;paddg:0 0.938rem;}@media(m-width: 40.625rem){{paddg:0 2.5rem;}}</style><div data-embed="watch-next" class="css-1pqv15d e10xr3vp5"><style data-emotn="css ttc84c">{text-align:center;marg:0 to;max-width:60rem;borr-top:thick solid black;}</style><div class="css-ttc84c e10xr3vp4"><style data-emotn="css 1sowyjy">{marg-bottom:1.25rem;}</style><div class="css-1sowyjy e10xr3vp3"><style data-emotn="css 15arjfd">{font-fay:GTWalsheim,Helveti,sans-serif;font-size:1.75rem;font-weight:bold;le-height:3rem;marg:0rem;marg-bottom:0.25rem;paddg-top:1rem;}@media(max-width: 48rem){{font-size:1.5rem;le-height:1.1;}}@media(m-width: 48rem){{le-height:1.1;}}@media(m-width: 64rem){{le-height:1.1;}}</style><h6 class="css-15arjfd e10xr3vp2"><span aria-hidn="te" class="css-0 eagam8p0"></span><span class="css-0 e10xr3vp1">Watch Next</span><span aria-hidn="te" class="css-0 eagam8p1"></span></h6><style data-emotn="css 8i43bq">{display:-webk-box;display:-webk-flex;display:-ms-flexbox;display:flex;-webk-align-ems:center;-webk-box-align:center;-ms-flex-align:center;align-ems:center;-webk-box-pack:center;-ms-flex-pack:center;-webk-jtify-ntent:center;jtify-ntent:center;marg:0rem;font-weight:normal;m-height:to;font-fay:GTWalsheim,Helveti,sans-serif;font-size:1.125rem;le-height:1.4;}</style><h6 class="css-8i43bq e10xr3vp0"> </h6></div><style data-emotn="css 1ui7hop">{marg-bottom:0.9375rem;--aspect-rat:56.25%;}</style><div class="__rp-ntaer css-1ui7hop e6l0f0"><style data-emotn="css 1yu8e3d">{marg-bottom:0.9375rem;width:100%;height:100%;} .__rp-ntaer{height:to;}</style><div data-embed="embed-vio" class="vio-player css-1yu8e3d e1ou1fny0"><style data-emotn="css 1uds6oo">{height:100%;width:100%;posn:relative;}</style><div class="css-1uds6oo e1f7ylgd6"><style data-emotn="css 1iiivv4">{background-lor:rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.4);borr:.1875rem solid whe;borr-radi:50%;lor:#fff;cursor:poter;height:3.75rem;left:50%;posn:absolute;top:50%;-webk-transform:translate(-50%,-50%);-moz-transform:translate(-50%,-50%);-ms-transform:translate(-50%,-50%);transform:translate(-50%,-50%);-webk-transn:all 0.4s;transn:all 0.4s;width:3.75rem;z-x:1;}.e1f7ylgd6:hover {background-lor:rgba(33, 150, 245, 0.8);lor:#ffffff;}@media(m-width: 48rem){{height:5.625rem;width:5.625rem;borr:.28125rem solid whe;}}</style><button aria-label="Play Vio" class="css-1iiivv4 e1f7ylgd1"><style data-emotn="css 1lhf7lq">{fill:#ffffff;height:1.4rem;vertil-align:middle;width:1.45rem;}@media(m-width: 48rem){{width:2.3125rem;height:3rem;}}</style><svg xmlns=" width="24" height="24" viewBox="0 0 24 24" style="fill: var(--primary, #000);" role="img" tle="Play" class="css-1lhf7lq e1f7ylgd2"><tle>play in .