Boys Gone Wild - Gay Men Who Want to Get Hazed - Nymag

Contents:

• I WAS A GAY AT BOY. THE “HORRIFIC CINT” AT BUCKNELL UNIVERSY’S FRAN’S HOE WAS NOT AN ANTI-LGBT ATTACK
• THE SECRET GAY HISTORY OF AN AMERIN FRATERNY
• GAY AND GREEK: THE EXPERIENCE OF BEG GAY AND A ATERNY
• MY ATERNY YEARS AS AN OUT GAY MAN
• L.A. AFFAIRS: I FELL FOR A GAY USC AT STAR. THEN I BEME ONE

I WAS A GAY AT BOY. THE “HORRIFIC CINT” AT BUCKNELL UNIVERSY’S FRAN’S HOE WAS NOT AN ANTI-LGBT ATTACK

The Syrace Universy chapter of Theta T was spend this week after the school’s newspaper, the Daily Orange, published shockg vios of at boys makg racist, homophobic, anti-semic oaths and engagg tly plorable behavr. Related: Rich Frat Boy Says He’s The Real Victim In Antigay Tira Agast Uber Driver, Plans To File Lawsu Agast The “Mimum Wage F*ggot”. The vios also clu simulatns of oral sex, masturbatn, glory hol, and dg e, and crackg homophobic jok: “Get together and [talk] about their signifint others while drkg different w and talkg gay girly accents!

Related: Frat Boy Dish On What It’s Like To Be Gay And Greek.

That the ps would act so blasé towards a mardg group of homophobic thugs was gallg.

THE SECRET GAY HISTORY OF AN AMERIN FRATERNY

That distctn matters, bee I do not want LGBT stunts feelg any ls safe than they need to my llege years the mid-00s, I straddled two worlds I lled “gay world” and “Greek world. I mpaigned agast the Kentucky amendment banng gay marriage that year, and 2006 helped anize a prott when the Universy of the Cumberlands expelled a stunt for beg gay. As the only out young gay kid at my school, I took the advancement of my sexual experienc to my own hands and I did what we all do: I bought a fake ID and h the gay clubs.

While I knew wouldn’t be like a gay llege eroti I’d read on (gay non, really), I rather naively wasn’t expectg the fall out. I realize I fell to that old gay adage of placg my feelgs on a person who, for whatever reason, was never gog to vt them back me. Worst of all, though, the shame attached to the memori of those first tim marred how I would approach sex for years.It was listeng to Years & Years’ new song “Sanctify,” and seeg the band’s out gay sger Olly Alexanr talk about how the song was spired his sexual trysts wh straight men, that I realized that the feelgs are way more mon than people let on.

Sure, I know all about gay guys havg sex wh straight guys, but felt reassurg to see him scribe the “sat and sner role” he embodied durg those experienc, and to hear the uncertaty and melancholy weaved to the song.More than anythg though, was the repeated lyril mantra of “I won’t be ashamed.” Bee as queer people, we’re buried lifetime’s worth of shame so vivid and searg that oftentim ’s cripplg.

GAY AND GREEK: THE EXPERIENCE OF BEG GAY AND A ATERNY

At least not I most fely was not at a aterny for two stunts who attempted to attend a aterny party at the Universy of Memphis, beg outwardly gay - or for beg gay - or perceived to be gay - or mored to be gay - was a triment. Hopefully, progrs ntu, and one day brgs to an end to the era of macho at boys and closeted gay guys.

We n't jt bsh a broad stroke and label all at boys and athlet homophob. But, for those few who are fervently antigay, they reprent one of two s pictg two very different double liv of some at boys and gay men on llege one si of the hate-filled at boy , you have those who nduct themselv well class, and around mp, but when they are wh their brothers and their peers, particularly at parti, that drastilly flips, revealg ugly nduct. And while we're learng about the cint at the Universy of Memphis, how many other gay stunts have been nied accs, not jt to parti, but to a secretly non-clive aterny that might have among s ranks those who sisterly mock, gra, vilify and sissify gays?

MY ATERNY YEARS AS AN OUT GAY MAN

For most closeted gay men on mp, there exists a different one si, for example, is the shield of a football broadster, sports edor, stunt senator, the gregar partier, and on the other the shield of secln - a closeted gay stunt who don't dare reveal his te nature for fear of beg shunned by peers, and at parti. The quietly gay men ntue to hear about the stgg news of cints of bigotry, hate crime beatgs around mp, and tragic, vastatg suicis of gay llege stunts. What if they knew I was gay?

We now have prom kgs who are gay, prom queens who are drag queens, and prom queens who are simply proudly have out llegiate athlet, stunt lears and gay aterni; however, some s our openns hs a wall, and those walls are those brick-led at ho that s forebodgly on the edge of llege mp and on the edge of our n still ny. Contued exposure and g forward n help ero the lter of the two, we n only hope that someday there is ls loose change the antigay at boys piggy bank and ls ppers the closeted gay penny Casey is a PR profsnal and an Adjunct Profsor at Wagner College New York Cy, and a equent lumnist for The Advote. This is not a gay g of age story.

No, this is a story about thgs I saw and heard and experienced, but don’t end wh me steppg bravely forward and proudly clarg my homosexualy to the world and fdg my place . Some of the iends did turn out to be gay, though I had no ia at the time, as they, I thk, had srcely any ia about me.

L.A. AFFAIRS: I FELL FOR A GAY USC AT STAR. THEN I BEME ONE

Afterward, my broad-shoulred stoner iend sually told Jason that “What we did was okay, bee I heard you have to do three tim wh a guy to make you gay.

In the aterny which I belonged, a small subset of iends began referrg to the annual fall visatn of alumni as “Homog Weekend. ) he was homosexual.

By the time I graduated 1987, I had been through a few Homog Weekends and taken the long walk wh several of my olr aterny brothers, who would awkwardly nfs to beg gay. I was too uptight about my own sexualy and this sort of thg h entirely too close to home (homo?