I'm 43 – but I'm ma to feel like a dosr by younger gay men | Metro News

gay misogynist

Gay men, first and foremost, are men.

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'THEY JT WANTED TO SILENCE HER': THE DARK SI OF GAY STAN CULTURE

For gay men, ‘stanng’ – beg a super fan of – female pop stars n be a valuable part of your inty. But too often this fandom laps to misogyny and body shamg * gay misogynist *

On the eve of a polil admistratn that is cidly antiwomen, wh a print-elect who has eely bragged about sexual asslt, we n no longer s idly by and allow this behavr among gay men to ntue. Blanket refals to a certa mographic of gay men — black, Asian, HIV-posive, kky — dite that you’re the sort of person who ref to see people beyond their membership said mographic. For example, I eely e “queer” spe s history as a slur, and I love llg myself and other gay men “homos, ” even though some nsir this word a slur also ( my fense, “homo” is more basely factual than any other term: I am, after all, a homosexual).

DO GAY MALE CULTURE HAVE A MISOGYNY PROBLEM?

Usually portrayed—often simplistilly—as ironclad, the bonds between gay men and straight women have been the foc of much bate lately. Actrs Rose McGowan ed a stir last month when she scribed gay men as “as misogynistic as straight men, if not more so” and blasted gay men for not standg up more for women's rights. More recently, rapper Azealia Banks echoed McGowan's remarks as she r... * gay misogynist *

I take a very oppose approach, believg gay and queer culture is very different om the world of our hetero unterparts — a wonrland of circu parti and glory hol and fabulo terr sign. This means you hold a stance that women don’t have tonomy over their bodi — a bizarre stance nsirg the fact that, as a gay man, you are not a woman and nnot speak to female inty. Fet the time-worn parallels between women and gay men that get touted everywhere, which are based on the assumptns that women are straight and all queer men are gay, not bi.

And I didn't know gay men uld be misogynists men -- like the rt of -- are products of a patriarchal social stcture, which femist theorists believe is the root e of female opprsn cultur throughout the world. ”“Brightney Pri”, as has affectnately been nicknamed, was one of the biggt events of the gay lendar – so big that 4, 000 revellers were left strand once the cy’s heavg public transport system failed unr the prsure. Scratch lightly at the surface and what flak off is, y, reciprocy and genue affectn, but also llo theory of the gay fan-diva lk is that of shared opprsn – gay men and women are both ground unr the wheel of hetero-patriarchy.

ROSE MCGOWAN ATTACKS LGBT MUNY FOR FAILG TO MPAIGN FOR FEMISM: 'GAY MEN ARE MORE MISOGYNISTIC THAN STRAIGHT MEN'

‘In gay years, you’re rather past your sell-by date, aren’t you?’ the person ont of me said, raisg an eyebrow.  * gay misogynist *

The actns have a distct edge of mockery, the air of a joke that their subject is not Michael Bronski, a Harvard Universy profsor and the thor of books on queer history and gay culture says “There is a long history of gay male fan culture latchg onto famo women and then turng on them. The language ed wh this culture is taken om the same place that Drag Race gets s lexin, namely the unrground subculture where LGBT people pete var drag and performance tegori, documented the film Paris is Burng, and an spiratn for Madonna and Beyoncé many gay men, Baker and myself clud, gay pop stan culture is the distillatn of everythg meangful life.

Wh hours, stan Twter had unearthed and circulated crimatg tweets by Kiyoko om ne years ago (when she was 18) an attempt to “ncel” her – excludg a person entirely om onle disurse, except as the target of hate mem – for darg to crique a song they Adam Byrne, a 23-year-old gay stan, this was a prime example of gay misogyny: “They didn’t re what she had to say. The behavur is ls like a playful poke the ribs, and more like a slap the last week, sger Mara Diamandis – an idol of the gay muny – tweeted back to a fan who is part of the gay stan muny after he sent her an abive tweet. Other forms of gay culture are siarly plagued by this sid heteronormativy – men on datg apps like Grdr e reas like “masc4masc” to praise masculy and shun femy other ’s important to remember that gay male culture exists at the nfluence of many social currents, cludg wir male misogyny and societal homophobia.

I’M 43 – BUT I’M MA TO FEEL LIKE A DOSR BY YOUNGER GAY MEN

  Are Closeted Gay Hbands Misogynistic? Misogyny (/mɪˈsɒdʒɪni/) is the hatred or dislike of women or girls. Misogyny n be manifted many ways, cludg sexual discrimatn, nigratn of women, vlence agast women, and sexual objectifitn of women. My answer to the qutn are closeted gay hbands misogynistic is y. I nnot say that all… * gay misogynist *

But wh gay male misogyny beg discsed more wily than ever, terms of our nightlife, queer spac, and social movements, what do say when this relatnship is often so heartls? Actrs Rose McGowan ed a stir last month when she scribed gay men as “as misogynistic as straight men, if not more so” and blasted gay men for not standg up more for women's rights.

Dpe the prevalence of straight woman/gay man bt iend clich, 's fair to say that gay men's relatnships wh and attus toward women are often more plex than what's portrayed your typil episo of “Will and Grace. From the gossipy slut-shamg of Hilton's blog to the mpy bchft that is RuPl's Drag Race, gay men have long been known to engage the kd of polilly rrect, bg repartee that often mak women the butt of the joke. The gay rights movement has largely succeed nvcg the world that LGBT folk are “normal” but, perhaps as a si effect of the assiatnist tennci, has taken on some of the unfortunate baggage associated wh mastream culture, cludg s misogyny.

SIGNS OF A GAY HBAND BY DEBRA SUTTON

Why is the prs phg the notn of 'gay misogyny'? There is no known lk between homosexualy and hatred of women - 's jt an dangero stereotype. * gay misogynist *

In seekg to fd the root for the speech patterns that many gay men share, he terviews gay celebri, voice ach, and lguists and disvers that his ep aversn for “soundg gay” is shared by many other gay men. In dog so, however, he soon regniz that the procs of tryg to “expla” the voic of gay men is self a byproduct of a kd of ternalized homophobia as well as gay men really be so unfortable wh the way they sound had they not experienced so much cricism and abe about while growg up? A tenncy to fetishize hypermasculy, to exalt “tops” over “bottoms, ” and to disparage men who are effemate persists among gay men until this day, spe the fact that the feelgs no doubt stem part as a rponse to all the ments hurled their way when they were younger.

AMBIVALENT SEXISM AND GAY MEN THE US AND UK

It seems only natural, once you've ternalized feelgs of aquacy and self-loathg, to want to monstrate that you're not what other people say you are, or worse, that you're not as queer as those other gay men over there, pecially if the very tribe you're a part of seems to be as much on board wh the assumptns as the straight culture. But 's worth rememberg that lns of gay men strongly support women both their actns and beliefs— their polil alignments and votg rerds, for stance—and monstrate a distctly femist worldview.

It's important then, to distguish the kd of misogyny that gay men might monstrate om the kd of misogyny g om straight men, the kd we associate wh sexual harassment, rape culture, polil opprsn, and vlence.

For gay men, misogyny seems to be borne out of a subnsc sire to be accepted—by their gay male peers and society at large, which has told them that soundg “feme” is not ial and that beg a man often means makg fun of or beltlg the ncerns of women. Even the aversn to lbians that some gay men have n likely be attributed to the women's refal to adhere to genr the fluidy of genr today—and wh an creasg acceptance of transgenr men and women as well as other exprsns of inty—'s possible we may be movg away om the narrow fns of mascule and feme, and wh , om some of the lgerg shame gay men have, which might manift self the more subtle forms of misogyny.

ROSE MCGOWAN WAS RIGHT: WOMEN CAN'T LEAN ON THE GAY RIGHTS MOVEMENT ANYMORE

Beg proud to be gay should mean beg proud of whatever way your gayns exprs self, and acceptg the tras that you posss whout havg to classify them—much the same way that straight women have treated gay men for so long now. For ee real time breakg news alerts sent straight to your box sign up to our breakg news emailsSign up to our ee breakg news emailsRose McGowan has clared an “dictment” of the gay muny, claimg that homosexual men are “more misogynistic” than their straight unterparts and dismissg those who boytted the Bnei-owned Dorchter Hotel llectn as “lnal idts” Amerin actrs, who claims to have lived a life “heavily entrenched” LGBT, was discsg the prott agast the hotel cha wh gay thor Bret Easton Ellis his weekly podst when she ma the McGowan Apologis For Speedo Comments - But Not For ThisThe Dorchter Collectn, which is owned by the Sultan of Bnei, has been the subject of boytts sce the ntroversial change to the penal was schled to e to effect on 22 April 2014 that ma homosexualy punishable by stong to ath. Stephen Fry was among the first celebri to attach themselv to the Amerin Psycho thor opened the nversatn by llg the Dorchter Collectn boytt a “form of narcissistic, self-victimisatn, gay sany” based on “illnary and tenuo” reports about the Sharia law that ultimately led to the harmg of “the people who simply work at the hotel” actrs, who herself held a fiant anti-boytt party at the Beverly Hills Hotel over the summer, agreed, then nmned the mpaigners for failg to fight agast the human rights ab on behalf of women Arab stat, too.

THE ‘GAY MEN ARE MISOGYNISTS’ MOVEMENT

The A-list boyttg the Sultan of Bnei's Dorchter Hotel CollectnShow all 11“You wanna talk about the fact that I have heard nobody the gay muny, no gay mal, standg up for women on any level?

SORRY, GAY GUYS, I'M NOT HERE FOR YOUR CASUAL MISOGYNYGAY MEN, FIRST AND FOREMOST, ARE {FONT:NORMAL 800 1.2REM/1.2 "D BOLD",SANS-SERIF;TEXT-TRANSFORM:NORMAL;LOR:HER;DISPLAY:LE-BLOCK;PADDG-BOTTOM:6PX;POSN:RELATIVE;TEXT-TRANSFORM:UPPERSE;}{BACKGROUND:#89308A;BOTTOM:0;NTENT:'';DISPLAY:BLOCK;HEIGHT:2PX;LEFT:0;POSN:ABSOLUTE;RIGHT:0;-WEBK-TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;WIDTH:100%;}{LEFT:51%;RIGHT:51%;WIDTH:0;}{FONT:NORMAL 800 1.2REM/1.2 "D BOLD",SANS-SERIF;TEXT-TRANSFORM:NORMAL;LOR:HER;DISPLAY:LE-BLOCK;PADDG-BOTTOM:6PX;POSN:RELATIVE;TEXT-TRANSFORM:UPPERSE;}{BACKGROUND:#89308A;BOTTOM:0;NTENT:'';DISPLAY:BLOCK;HEIGHT:2PX;LEFT:0;POSN:ABSOLUTE;RIGHT:0;-WEBK-TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;WIDTH:100%;}{LEFT:51%;RIGHT:51%;WIDTH:0;}LIFEBY NI LANGMARCH 8, 2017/7:56 {HEIGHT:HER;DISPLAY:-WEBK-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-FLEX;DISPLAY:-MS-FLEXBOX;DISPLAY:FLEX;POSN:RELATIVE;-WEBK-FLEX-WRAP:WRAP;-MS-FLEX-WRAP:WRAP;FLEX-WRAP:WRAP;-WEBK-ALIGN-EMS:CENTER;-WEBK-BOX-ALIGN:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-ALIGN:CENTER;ALIGN-EMS:CENTER;-WEBK-BOX-PACK:CENTER;-WEBK-JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-PACK:CENTER;JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-WEBK-TRANSFORM-ORIG:CENTER;-MS-TRANSFORM-ORIG:CENTER;TRANSFORM-ORIG:CENTER;} IMG{HEIGHT:100%;WIDTH:100%;OBJECT-F:VER;}{HEIGHT:574PX;WIDTH:1020PX;}BY NI LANGMARCH 8, 2017 / 7:56 AM{"@NTEXT":","@TYPE":"NEWSARTICLE","HEADLE":"SORRY, GAY GUYS, I'M NOT HERE FOR YOUR CASUAL MISOGYNY","THUMBNAILURL":","DATEPUBLISHED":"2017-03-08T12:56:07.000+0000","DATEMODIFIED":"2017-03-08T12:56:07.000+0000","IMAGE":{"@NTEXT":","@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT","URL":","WIDTH":1920,"HEIGHT":1080},"URL":","THOR":{"@TYPE":"ORGANIZATN","NAME":"LOGO TV"},"MAENTYOFPAGE":{"@TYPE":"WEBPAGE","@ID":"},"PUBLISHER":{"@TYPE":"ORGANIZATN","@ID":","NAME":"LOGO TV","URL":","LOGO":{"@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT"}},"CREATOR":"NI LANG","KEYWORDS":"OPN","ARTICLESECTN":"LIFE"}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}A FEW WEEKS AGO AN OLD IEND REACHED OUT TO ME ON FACEBOOK WH A PROBLEM: ANNA (NOT HER REAL NAME) WORKS AT A HIGH-END SMETICS STORE, WHERE SHE REGULARLY TERACTS WH GAY MALE CTOMERS, MANY OF WHOM ARE BUYG EYHADOW OR BLH FOR THEIR LATT DRAG LOOK. A CTOMER HAD E , AND, WHEN SHE OFFERED ASSISTANCE, HE REPLIED, “HONEY, I DON’T NEED HELP OM YOU. YOU NEED HELP OM ME.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}WHEN ANNA BROUGHT UP THE CINT TO HER FEMALE WORKERS, THEY TOLD HER THE GUYS WHO E EQUENTLY OFTEN LL THEM “BCH” AND “C*NT,” AND GET FENSIVE WHEN WOMEN SAY THEY DON'T LIKE . IT’S OL, THEY SIST, BEE THEY’RE {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}“I’VE BEEN THE DTRY TEN YEARS, AND I N THK OF TONS OF SUATNS LIKE THAT,” ANNA EXPLAED. “I FEEL BAD FOR BEG SO SENSIZED TO .”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}THE THGS HAPPEN SO OFTEN, FACT, THAT SHE WASN'T SURE IF WAS NORMAL OR SOMETHG MORE SID. SHE FELT LIKE SHE MIGHT BE OVERREACTG. BUT SHE WASN'{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}MISOGYNY AMONG GAY MEN HAS BEE A MAJOR TOPIC RECENTLY: IN 2014, ROSE MCGOWAN CLAIMED THAT "GAY MEN ARE AS MISOGYNISTIC AS STRAIGHT MEN, IF NOT MORE SO." SOME THOUGHTFUL RPONS LLED THE PARISON TO QUTN, BUT DIDN'T DISPUTE HER OVERALL PREMISE: WHEN TO TREATG WOMEN LIKE WHOLE PEOPLE, NOT OBJECTS OR ACCSORI, A LOT OF QUEER MEN HAVE WORK TO DO.PORTRA DISGTED YOUNG MAN. NEGATIVE HUMAN {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}WE ALL KNOW SOMEONE WHO LOUDLY PROCLAIMS HOW GROSSED OUT HE IS BY VAGAS. THEN THERE ARE THE GUYS WHO THK S FE TO DNKENLY TOGGLE A WOMAN'S BREASTS A BAR BEE HE'S NOT ATTRACTED TO HER. NOT ALL OF ARE GAY DONALD TMPS, GRABBG AT EVERY WOMAN WH IMPUNY, BUT ENOUGH {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}BEE GAY MEN, FIRST AND FOREMOST, ARE MEN. WE'RE NOT IMMUNE TO THE CULTURAL NDNG THAT WH GROWG UP A SOCIETY THAT VIEWS FEMY AS "WEAK" AND "LSER." EVEN IF YOUR BT IENDS ARE WOMEN, THAT PROGRAMMG IS DIFFICULT TO BREAK. SEXISM AMONG GAY MEN PERSISTS BEE MANY OF DON’T FEEL THE NEED TO CHANGE, PECIALLY WHEN THE HIERARCHY THAT GLORIFI MALENS SEEMS TO BENEF {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}BUT MISOGYNY HURTS GAY MEN, TOO. BEE MISOGYNY IS AT THE ROOT OF {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}GAY MEN ARE STEREOTYPED AS FEME BEE WE HAVE SEX WH MEN, AND SOCIETY HAS A NEGATIVE ASSOCIATN WH FEMY. IT’S AN SULT TO WALK, THROW, OR TALK LIKE A GIRL. WHEN A GAY MAN IS BEATEN UP, OR TNTED AS A “FAGGOT,” ’S BEE HE'S VIEWED AS BEG LIKE A {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}WHICH IS THE WORST THG A MAN N BE. (JT LOOK AT ALL THE "NO FEMME" PROFIL ON GRDR.){BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}I TOLD ANNA THAT IF HER MALE CTOMERS E LANGUAGE LIKE THAT AGA, SHE SHOULD LL THEM OUT. DRAW ATTENTN TO THEIR WORDS—WHAT THEY REALLY MEAN, HOW THEY MAKE HER FEEL. EXPLA THAT MIGHT BE FUN FOR HIM, BUT 'S NOT FOR {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}WE N ALL BENEF OM A LTLE TN, AND STEAD OF BSHG OFF ACCATNS OF SEXISM OR, WORSE, GASLIGHTG OR FEMALE IENDS, WE SHOULD JT LISTEN. BUT IF GAY MEN DON'T EVOLVE PAST THEIR OWN MISOGYNY, 'S NOT BEE OUR SEXUALY GIV A PASS. IT'S BEE WE REFE TO {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;CLEAR:BOTH;}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;MARG:0 TO;WIDTH:90%;M-WIDTH:288PX;MAX-WIDTH:1440PX;M-HEIGHT:194PX;}LATT NEWS

”LGBT chary Stonewall said that McGowan’s ments seemed to be “based on a skewed versn of realy” and “unrme the equaly” that men and women – gay or straight – have fought for. “Lbian, gay and bisexual people have fought hard to achieve the equaly we have today – often wh the support of valuable alli who aren’t gay, ” Jam Taylor, Stonewall’s Head of Policy, told The Inpennt.

GAY MEN LIKE ME NEED TO START ACKNOWLEDGG OUR MISOGYNY PROBLEM

Comprised are specific exampl such as negative stereotyp of women that are sometim enacted popular culture like on Rupl’s Drag Race (Tabberer 2017), the firg of a Gay Tim magaze edor for sexist and anti-Semic tweets (Rudgard 2017), Stephen Fry’s public ments about women cludg his view on why women do not enjoy sex (Newkey-Burn 2016), Milo Yiannopoulos’ nstant misogyny agast women (Lopez 2017), and so forth. The challenge for rearchers is to intify potentially harmful negative attus towards women by gay men whout overgeneralizg, spegoatg, or fettg the heterosexism gay men face (Simoni and Walters 2001). Overall, men dismiss the severy of sexual harassment more than women, even the s of man-to-man sexual harassment (DeSouza and Solberg 2004) the fdgs, seems reasonable to nclu gay men and women would shun problematic attus such as sexism and homophobia.

*BEAR-MAGAZINE.COM* GAY MISOGYNIST

15 Signs You’re a Gay Misogynist .

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