Self-loathg among gay people is nothg new. We’re overwhelmed by | Matthew Todd | The Guardian

Contents:

• OVERG THE SHAME OF BEG GAY
• LIVG AUTHENTILLY THE LGBTQ COMMUNY: HOW TO MOVE PAST “GAY SHAME” [VIO]
• SELF-LOATHG AMONG GAY PEOPLE IS NOTHG NEW. WE’RE OVERWHELMED BY
• JACKSONVILLE JAGUARS' KEV MAXEN BE FIRST MALE COACH TO COME OUT AS GAY MAJOR U.S. SPORTS
• GAY SHAME: 5 WAYS GAY MEN COMPENSATE

OVERG THE SHAME OF BEG GAY

I foc on keepg eye ntact wh objects the distance but then the thoughts pop so quickly…Don’t look gayCan they see if I am gay? I also have ught myself on very few ocsns when I was younger (not so much now thankfully) when tellg someone ‘I am gay’ I would say a quieter tone so as not to draw attentn. I was not fortable my own sk as I do not I thk I have fully accepted who I am, a gay man livg this world.

So om then on I answered hontly and tell them before they asked me that y, I was datg this great guy and the embarrassed feelgs would subsi and I would feel more a kid growg up Mayo the early 1980’s I heard the term gay beg ed but always a negative manner. I knew om a very early age I was gay so my earlit beliefs of myself were negative, shameful, disgtg and then my anxiety and shyns veloped.

LIVG AUTHENTILLY THE LGBTQ COMMUNY: HOW TO MOVE PAST “GAY SHAME” [VIO]

Red flag, look at the gay boy playg rounr’s. Then I started Irish dancg wh the rt of the kids, all the lads hated , I loved , I was really good at but I felt embarrassed, look at the gay boy Irish dancg. I knew this looked gay and the kids were judgg me so I jt stopped after primary school.

I stopped somethg I loved so that I uld f by pretendg to like thgs I hated other kids still picked up on my gayns, my differenc. I never talked about girls, didn’t follow an English football team, talked more to girls as I felt more relaxed around them as they were not llg me gay, queer, homo, well at the begng they didn’t.

SELF-LOATHG AMONG GAY PEOPLE IS NOTHG NEW. WE’RE OVERWHELMED BY

I looked like the other guys but I was different, I was gay, I stood out to them and they hated me.

Even up to my early 20’s as I spoke to people about beg gay I would say if someone offered me a tablet to be straight I would take two so I uld be like the rt of the lads out there, to f , to fa to the background, to be one of the mak me feel ls than, not good enough, not handsome enough, not smart enough.

I thank God today for makg me the person I am now, I was meant to be a gay man livg this betiful yet plex world and now I am embracg my differenc, my quirks, the quali that make me who I am. I am really startg to love the person I am right now who happens to be gay and I am lettg those old feelgs of shame that hnted me go forever. That was not my young person out there who is gay and is havg issu wh this please be strong, there is nothg wrong wh you.

JACKSONVILLE JAGUARS' KEV MAXEN BE FIRST MALE COACH TO COME OUT AS GAY MAJOR U.S. SPORTS

You are gay and this is jt a part of who you are. I know right now you might thk this is so huge but you have so many other great quali that make you who you are and beg gay is jt one of someone did have a tablet that uld turn me om gay to straight, I would take that tablet and flg so damn far away.

I love who I am, I love that I am gay man livg my life and I love that now my differenc that I hated so much as a kid are now beg rpected, rejoiced and accepted. We also have to ask the qutn where do the root of this shame of beg gay e om? How did fect our society and cultural ndng of how we perceive people who are gay to be?

GAY SHAME: 5 WAYS GAY MEN COMPENSATE

This is an article for another day, but so many of ternalise this shame when we never we n be is te to ourselv, rpect others and most importantly rpect and love ourselv, and then we n make posive chang this betiful yet plex world of rmatn BeLonG To is the natnal anisatn for Lbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgenred (LGBT) young people, aged between 14 and 23 – Contact for more you need help please talk to iends, fay, a GP, therapist or one of the ee nfintial helple servic. 14 Ways To Defeat Your Fears of Beg Gay.

There are many gay men who say "I'm not part of the scene" -- men who hate gay bars and, prumably, crowds of queer people general. Internalized homophobia -- self-shamg, self-hatred -- leads many gay men, and many queer people general, to recreate their closets long after they're "out" by shunng others, particularly those they nsir "flamboyant. " Y, there are some good reasons to rce your participatn gay bars (time, money, health).

But you mt spend time wh others, whether that means havg a group of gay movie iends or queer gamers or playg on a gay sports team. Go to gay bars, even if they make you unfortable. Fd gay iends.