Often the real reason gay men fd so difficult to fd love and happs is bee they are their own worst enemy. YourTango expert Rick Clemons, The Comg Out Coach, drops some rather blunt tth about how gay men need to get out of their own way.
Contents:
- ARE GAY MEN HAPPIER THAN STRAIGHT MEN?
- WHO ARE THE HAPPIT? STRAIGHTS AND GAYS, BUT NOT BISEXUALS
- 5 (RATHER BLUNT) REASONS WHY GAY MEN STGGLE TO FD HAPPS
- GAY (HOMOSEXUAL) AND GAY (HAPPY)
- THE UNTRI WHERE GAY MEN ARE THE HAPPIT
ARE GAY MEN HAPPIER THAN STRAIGHT MEN?
* are gay happy *
A good illtratn of the facts is the recent spate of news stori about how gay men are happier than heterosexual men. "A new study has found that gay and bisexual men are ls likely to be prsed and have psychologil problems than heterosexual men.
WHO ARE THE HAPPIT? STRAIGHTS AND GAYS, BUT NOT BISEXUALS
"Of urse gays are ls strsed.
Alas, none of this good news for gays and spankg fetishists is really backed up by the data the origal study, which, while trigug, is hardly evince that is beg out and gay that mak men happier (let alone women). For one, the study reced participants Montreal, a large and fairly progrsive cy where beg openly gay do not e wh high social or enomic sts.
While gay men the study seemed to experience ls strs and prsn than straight men, there are a variety of alternative explanatns that might expla this fact (like whether they worked out or not; whether they had children or not; e level and stabily). In other words, you might be out at work and at home, but if your grandparents don't know you're gay, then you're marked as closeted.
5 (RATHER BLUNT) REASONS WHY GAY MEN STGGLE TO FD HAPPS
Once upon a time there was a gay man and he me out of the closet and was happy and lived happily everyafter. It seems like more than jt bad reportg to tell gay men and women that happs is up to them, not the world at large, and happs will rive om disclosure when that very disclosure n be dangero. All the study really told is that beg gay, male, young, ted and whe a large, libreral cy like Montreal n be advantageo.
GAY (HOMOSEXUAL) AND GAY (HAPPY)
” Optns of gay/lbian; bisexual; heterosexual or straight; or don’t know. ” [only 4 optns, neglect inti such as mostly straight, pansexual, mostly gay, asexual, kk, qutng]. Only 2% intified as gay/lbian and only 2% intified as bisexual.
Counter to mon sense, over a third of those wh lifelong same-sex partners and nearly half of those wh lifelong both-sex partners intified not as gay or bisexual but as straight. If you ed an inty measure, gays, lbians, and bisexuals were ls happy than straights. If, however, you ed same-sex behavr, gays and lbians were as happy as straights, but not so for dividuals wh both-sex partners--they remaed relatively unhappy.
THE UNTRI WHERE GAY MEN ARE THE HAPPIT
Bee the vast majory of dividuals who intify as bisexual are women (equently the 60% to 80% range), any study that b gays/lbians wh bisexuals and fds negative mental or physil health problems likely distorts our unrstandg of sexual mori and th tells ltle about male bisexuals, gay mal, and lbians. Th, if the goal of rearch is to document the problematic nature of beg gay, lbian, or bisexual, asssg sexual inty is the way to go.