Tegan and Sara Rell 'Pros and Cons' of Growg Up Gay the '90s

Contents:

• TEGAN AND SARA RELL 'PROS AND CONS' OF GROWG UP GAY THE '90S: 'IT WAS EASIER SOME WAYS'
• MY EXTREMELY GAY ADOLCENCE, AS TOLD THROUGH TEGAN AND SARA SONGSAS A TEEN FUMBLG MY WAY THROUGH MY QUEERNS, THE QU SISTERS ALWAYS HAD MY BACK. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, YOU GODDAMN {FONT:NORMAL 800 1.2REM/1.2 "D BOLD",SANS-SERIF;TEXT-TRANSFORM:NORMAL;LOR:HER;DISPLAY:LE-BLOCK;PADDG-BOTTOM:6PX;POSN:RELATIVE;TEXT-TRANSFORM:UPPERSE;}{BACKGROUND:#89308A;BOTTOM:0;NTENT:'';DISPLAY:BLOCK;HEIGHT:2PX;LEFT:0;POSN:ABSOLUTE;RIGHT:0;-WEBK-TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;WIDTH:100%;}{LEFT:51%;RIGHT:51%;WIDTH:0;}{FONT:NORMAL 800 1.2REM/1.2 "D BOLD",SANS-SERIF;TEXT-TRANSFORM:NORMAL;LOR:HER;DISPLAY:LE-BLOCK;PADDG-BOTTOM:6PX;POSN:RELATIVE;TEXT-TRANSFORM:UPPERSE;}{BACKGROUND:#89308A;BOTTOM:0;NTENT:'';DISPLAY:BLOCK;HEIGHT:2PX;LEFT:0;POSN:ABSOLUTE;RIGHT:0;-WEBK-TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;WIDTH:100%;}{LEFT:51%;RIGHT:51%;WIDTH:0;}LIFEBY SAM MANZELLASEPTEMBER 19, 2018/12:53 {HEIGHT:HER;DISPLAY:-WEBK-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-FLEX;DISPLAY:-MS-FLEXBOX;DISPLAY:FLEX;POSN:RELATIVE;-WEBK-FLEX-WRAP:WRAP;-MS-FLEX-WRAP:WRAP;FLEX-WRAP:WRAP;-WEBK-ALIGN-EMS:CENTER;-WEBK-BOX-ALIGN:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-ALIGN:CENTER;ALIGN-EMS:CENTER;-WEBK-BOX-PACK:CENTER;-WEBK-JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-PACK:CENTER;JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-WEBK-TRANSFORM-ORIG:CENTER;-MS-TRANSFORM-ORIG:CENTER;TRANSFORM-ORIG:CENTER;} IMG{HEIGHT:100%;WIDTH:100%;OBJECT-F:VER;}{HEIGHT:1789PX;WIDTH:2412PX;}MICHAEL BUCKNER/GETTY IMAG FOR LOGOLOS ANGELES, CA - APRIL 13: (L-R) SARA QU AND TEGAN QU OF TEGAN AND SARA ATTEND THE 2013 NEWNOWNEXT AWARDS AT THE FONDA THEATRE ON APRIL 13, 2013 LOS ANGEL, CALIFORNIA. (PHOTO BY MICHAEL BUCKNER/GETTY IMAG FOR LOGO)BY SAM MANZELLASEPTEMBER 19, 2018 / 12:53 PM{"@NTEXT":","@TYPE":"NEWSARTICLE","HEADLE":"MY EXTREMELY GAY ADOLCENCE, AS TOLD THROUGH TEGAN AND SARA SONGS","THUMBNAILURL":","DATEPUBLISHED":"2018-09-19T16:53:12.000+0000","DATEMODIFIED":"2018-09-19T16:53:12.000+0000","IMAGE":{"@NTEXT":","@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT","URL":","WIDTH":1920,"HEIGHT":1080},"URL":","THOR":{"@TYPE":"ORGANIZATN","NAME":"LOGO TV"},"MAENTYOFPAGE":{"@TYPE":"WEBPAGE","@ID":"},"PUBLISHER":{"@TYPE":"ORGANIZATN","@ID":","NAME":"LOGO TV","URL":","LOGO":{"@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT"}},"CREATOR":"SAM MANZELLA","KEYWORDS":"OPN","ARTICLESECTN":"LIFE"}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}TODAY, SISTERS-SLASH-BANDMAT TEGAN AND SARA QU, ARGUABLY CANADA'S GREATT AND GAYT CLAIM TO FAME, TURN 38. IN MY EXTREMELY BIASED OPN, EVERY DAY IS A GOOD DAY TO CELEBRATE THEIR CREDIBLE AND EXTENSIVE DISGRAPHY, BUT THAT'S EVEN MORE TE {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}TO HONOR THE BIRTH OF MY MOST CHERISHED QUEER INS, I'VE DUG EP TO MY MEMORY FOR SEVEN FORMATIVE MOMENTS OM MY MSY-BUT-WONRFUL GAY YOUTH—AND THE TEGAN AND SARA TRACKS THAT MA GROWG UP QUEER A LTLE EASIER. THE SISTERS QU HAVE BEEN THERE FOR ME OM THE START: I FOUND THE CON, THEIR VERABLE MASTERPIECE OF AN DIE ROCK ALBUM OM '07, WHEN I WAS 13. COUNTLS LISTENS LATER, THAT ALBUM STILL SLAPS HARR THAN MOST. IN SOME OF MY DARKT MOMENTS, MA ME FEEL LIKE I WAS ACTUALLY, GENUELY GOG TO BE {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}RIGHT THE FEELS, MAN!{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}TEGAN AND SARA, IF YOU'RE READG THIS, THANK YOU. FOR EVERYTHG. HAPPY EAKG {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}EARLY ONSET GAY PANIC/ "WALKG WH A GHOST"{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-FLEX;DISPLAY:-MS-FLEXBOX;DISPLAY:FLEX;-WEBK-BOX-PACK:CENTER;-WEBK-JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-PACK:CENTER;JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;POSN:RELATIVE;PADDG-BOTTOM:56.49999999999999%;} .TWTER-TWEET-RENRED, {M-WIDTH:65%;WIDTH:TO !IMPORTANT;} {WIDTH:100%;} {MARG-LEFT:TO !IMPORTANT;MARG-RIGHT:TO !IMPORTANT;} IMG{MAX-WIDTH:100%;WIDTH:100%;} > IAME{BORR:NONE;MAX-WIDTH:100%;} > *{MAX-WIDTH:NONE !IMPORTANT;POSN:ABSOLUTE;HEIGHT:100% !IMPORTANT;WIDTH:100% !IMPORTANT;}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}"I WAS WALKG WH A GHOST / AND I SAID PLEASE, PLEASE DON'T SIST"{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}DO YOU REMEMBER THE FIRST MOMENT YOU REALIZED YOU PROBABLY WEREN'T STRAIGHT? I DO. IN EIGHTH GRA, A IEND WAS TELLG ME ABOUT HER PROGRSIVE TERFAH CHURCH, WHERE YOUTH WHO GREW UP THE MUNY LEARNED ABOUT DIFFERENT FAHS, LIFTYL, AND INTI, CLUDG SEXUALY AND GENR INTY. (I WAS RAISED ROMAN CATHOLIC, SO THIS MA ME FEEL LIKE A LERAL EMBODIMENT OF THE EXPANDG BRA MEME.) SHE THEN REVEALED THAT SHE WAS QUTNG HER OWN SEXUALY. "GIRLS ARE JT SO... BETIFUL," SHE TOLD ME HALF-CRLOLY, AS IF SHE WERE NFSG THE THOUGHT ALOUD FOR THE FIRST TIME. "I N'T STOP LOOKG AT GIRLS AND THKG THEY'RE SO PRETTY AND SMART AND AMAZG. I DON'T THK MOST GIRLS LOOK AT GIRLS THAT WAY, YOU KNOW?"{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}I SED AND NODD, BUT MY HEART BEGAN TO RACE AS MY FIRST BABY-GAY PANIC SET : WA... THEY DON'T?{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}COMG OUT TO MYSELF/ "YOU WOULDN'T LIKE ME"{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-FLEX;DISPLAY:-MS-FLEXBOX;DISPLAY:FLEX;-WEBK-BOX-PACK:CENTER;-WEBK-JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-PACK:CENTER;JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;POSN:RELATIVE;PADDG-BOTTOM:75%;} .TWTER-TWEET-RENRED, {M-WIDTH:65%;WIDTH:TO !IMPORTANT;} {WIDTH:100%;} {MARG-LEFT:TO !IMPORTANT;MARG-RIGHT:TO !IMPORTANT;} IMG{MAX-WIDTH:100%;WIDTH:100%;} > IAME{BORR:NONE;MAX-WIDTH:100%;} > *{MAX-WIDTH:NONE !IMPORTANT;POSN:ABSOLUTE;HEIGHT:100% !IMPORTANT;WIDTH:100% !IMPORTANT;}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}"I FEEL LIKE I WOULDN'T LIKE ME IF I MET ME / I FEEL LIKE YOU WOULDN'T LIKE ME IF YOU MET ME..."{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}FAST-FORWARD TO MY SOPHOMORE YEAR OF HIGH SCHOOL. IT WAS SPRGTIME WASPY SUBURBAN WTCHTER COUNTY, NY. THE HORMON WERE A-RAGG, AND THE ANGST ME TOW. I'D SPENT ABOUT A YEAR GRAPPLG WH MY OWN ATTRACTN TO OTHER GIRLS AT SCHOOL. SHOVG DOWN SEEMED TO HELP—THAT IS, UNTIL IENDS BEGAN TO FLIRT WH EACH OTHER AND ASK EACH OTHER OUT. FORCED TO FACE MY OWN FEELGS WHEN IENDS ASKED SHYLY ABOUT WHO I "LIKED," I REALIZED I ULDN'T HOLD THE GAY {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}THAT YEAR, I PRIVATELY ME TO GRIPS WH MY QUEERNS. THOUGH I KNEW MY HEART OF HEARTS THAT NONE OF MY LOVED ON WOULD EVER REJECT ME FOR WHO I WAS, THE GRAVY OF BEG WEIRD, OF BEG DIFFERENT, SANK LIKE A LEAD WEIGHT THE P OF MY STOMACH. "YOU WOULDN'T LIKE ME," {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}COMG OUT TO THE WORLD/ "DARK COME SOON"{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-FLEX;DISPLAY:-MS-FLEXBOX;DISPLAY:FLEX;-WEBK-BOX-PACK:CENTER;-WEBK-JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-PACK:CENTER;JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;POSN:RELATIVE;PADDG-BOTTOM:75%;} .TWTER-TWEET-RENRED, {M-WIDTH:65%;WIDTH:TO !IMPORTANT;} {WIDTH:100%;} {MARG-LEFT:TO !IMPORTANT;MARG-RIGHT:TO !IMPORTANT;} IMG{MAX-WIDTH:100%;WIDTH:100%;} > IAME{BORR:NONE;MAX-WIDTH:100%;} > *{MAX-WIDTH:NONE !IMPORTANT;POSN:ABSOLUTE;HEIGHT:100% !IMPORTANT;WIDTH:100% !IMPORTANT;}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}"HOLD OUT FOR THE ON YOU KNOW WILL LOVE YOU / HI OUT OM THE ON YOU KNOW WILL LOVE YOU / YOU, YOU TOO..."{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}FOR ME, G OUT SEEMED TO HAPPEN SLOWLY, THEN ALL AT ONCE. I STARTED SMALL, NFIDG THOSE I KNEW I ULD TST WH MY MOST VULNERABLE NFSN—MY S. MY BT IEND. MY LTLE SISTER. BUT WORD SEEMED TO SPREAD LIKE WILDFIRE, AND BEFORE I KNEW , MY "SECRET" WASN'T SO SECRET ANYMORE. I'LL GIVE JUNR YEAR SAM SOME CRED WHERE CRED IS DUE: SHE HANDLED THE SOCIAL RAMIFITNS OF G OUT A MAJORY NSERVATIVE TOWN WH UNCHARACTERISTIC APLOMB, HOLDG HER HEAD UP HIGH DURG THE MOMENTS THAT MATTERED MOST. SHE ALSO CRIED A LOT. MA SOME QUTNABLE CHOIC. LET PEOPLE , PHED THEM {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}IT WAS A PROCS, AFTER ALL. SHE WAS 17. SHE WAS LEARNG HOW TO BE. {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}I'M 22 NOW. IT'S BEEN A FEW YEARS, BUT I'M STILL {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}UNREQUED LOVE/ "WHERE DO THE GOOD GO"{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-FLEX;DISPLAY:-MS-FLEXBOX;DISPLAY:FLEX;-WEBK-BOX-PACK:CENTER;-WEBK-JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-PACK:CENTER;JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;POSN:RELATIVE;PADDG-BOTTOM:75%;} .TWTER-TWEET-RENRED, {M-WIDTH:65%;WIDTH:TO !IMPORTANT;} {WIDTH:100%;} {MARG-LEFT:TO !IMPORTANT;MARG-RIGHT:TO !IMPORTANT;} IMG{MAX-WIDTH:100%;WIDTH:100%;} > IAME{BORR:NONE;MAX-WIDTH:100%;} > *{MAX-WIDTH:NONE !IMPORTANT;POSN:ABSOLUTE;HEIGHT:100% !IMPORTANT;WIDTH:100% !IMPORTANT;}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}"LOOK ME THE EYE AND PROMISE NO LOVE'S LIKE OUR LOVE / LOOK ME THE HEART AND UN-BREAK BROKEN, WON'T HAPPEN..."{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}YOU KNOW THAT AGE-OLD ADAGE ABOUT NEVER FETTG YOUR FIRST LOVE? WELL, I'M G HOT TO ADD THAT YOU NEVER FET YOUR FIRST UNREQUED LOVE, EHER. THIS ONE HURT LIKE A MOTHERFUCKER, THOUGH I'M HAPPY TO SAY I ME OUT OF THIS GAY FIAS RELATIVELY UNSTHED. HELL, THE GIRL QUTN IS STILL ONE OF MY CLOST AND ART IENDS. "WHERE DO THE GOOD GO?" NOT TOO FAR, APPARENTLY. I KNOW, I KNOW, I'M {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}FIRST REAL LOVE/ "NETEEN"{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-FLEX;DISPLAY:-MS-FLEXBOX;DISPLAY:FLEX;-WEBK-BOX-PACK:CENTER;-WEBK-JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-PACK:CENTER;JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;POSN:RELATIVE;PADDG-BOTTOM:75%;} .TWTER-TWEET-RENRED, {M-WIDTH:65%;WIDTH:TO !IMPORTANT;} {WIDTH:100%;} {MARG-LEFT:TO !IMPORTANT;MARG-RIGHT:TO !IMPORTANT;} IMG{MAX-WIDTH:100%;WIDTH:100%;} > IAME{BORR:NONE;MAX-WIDTH:100%;} > *{MAX-WIDTH:NONE !IMPORTANT;POSN:ABSOLUTE;HEIGHT:100% !IMPORTANT;WIDTH:100% !IMPORTANT;}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}"I FELT YOU MY LEGS / BEFORE I EVER MET YOU / AND WHEN I LAY BI YOU / FOR THE FIRST TIME I TOLD YOU / I FEEL YOU MY HEART AND I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU..."{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}AH, Y, THE MYSTIL WHIRLWD THAT IS FIRST LOVE. AND A WHIRLWD, WAS: I WAS NOT 19, BUT 18, A HMAN LLEGE WHOSE FIRST REAL GIRLIEND CHANGED THE GAME. I WON'T ELABORATE ON THE TAILS, BOTH BEE I RPECT MY EX'S PRIVACY AND BEE THE WHOLE THG IS TRAGILLY, EMBARRASSGLY GAY. IT'S THE GAYT THG EVER. JT PICTURE EVERY STUPID LBIAN STEREOTYPE YOU'VE EVER HEARD, AND YOU N PROBABLY SEE THE ENTIRE MS UNFOLD, M A FEW INTIFYG {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}WE WERE ENGAGED A YEAR . I WAS 19. NETEEN! SERLY, SAM? GET A {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}AND FIRST REAL HEARTBREAK/ "I WAS A FOOL"{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-FLEX;DISPLAY:-MS-FLEXBOX;DISPLAY:FLEX;-WEBK-BOX-PACK:CENTER;-WEBK-JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-PACK:CENTER;JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;POSN:RELATIVE;PADDG-BOTTOM:56.49999999999999%;} .TWTER-TWEET-RENRED, {M-WIDTH:65%;WIDTH:TO !IMPORTANT;} {WIDTH:100%;} {MARG-LEFT:TO !IMPORTANT;MARG-RIGHT:TO !IMPORTANT;} IMG{MAX-WIDTH:100%;WIDTH:100%;} > IAME{BORR:NONE;MAX-WIDTH:100%;} > *{MAX-WIDTH:NONE !IMPORTANT;POSN:ABSOLUTE;HEIGHT:100% !IMPORTANT;WIDTH:100% !IMPORTANT;}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}"I STUCK AROUND / I DID BEHAVE, I SAVED YOU EVERY TIME / I WAS A FOOL FOR LOVE / I WAS A FOOL FOR LOVE / I WAS A FOOL / I WAS A FOOL..."{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}AND THE FLIP SI: WHEN MY FIRST ROMANTIC RELATNSHIP EXPLOD MY FACE. I'D LET MY GOALS AND MY SIR GET LOST THE NEED TO PLEASE AND RE FOR MY PARTNER, SOMETHG I SPENT TOO LONG NYG. THE BREAKUP WAS MUTUAL THE RPECT THAT THE RELATNSHIP HAD REACHED S NATURAL END, AND WE BOTH KNEW . IT WAS NOT MUTUAL, HOWEVER, HOW WE PED THE AFTERMATH. FACED WH THE CSHG WEIGHT OF LOSG MY FIRST LOVE AND CLOST IEND, I CRASHED AND BURNED. NOT THE FUN "CRASH AND BURN," EHER. THE SUCKY KD. IT'S BEEN SOME TIME NOW, BUT STILL {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}I WAS A GODDAMN FOOL. LET'S BE REAL, THOUGH: AREN'T WE ALL FOOLS FOR LOVE? THE QU SISTERS SEEM TO THK {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}COMG OUT THE OTHER END/ "STOP DIRE"{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-FLEX;DISPLAY:-MS-FLEXBOX;DISPLAY:FLEX;-WEBK-BOX-PACK:CENTER;-WEBK-JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-PACK:CENTER;JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;POSN:RELATIVE;PADDG-BOTTOM:56.49999999999999%;} .TWTER-TWEET-RENRED, {M-WIDTH:65%;WIDTH:TO !IMPORTANT;} {WIDTH:100%;} {MARG-LEFT:TO !IMPORTANT;MARG-RIGHT:TO !IMPORTANT;} IMG{MAX-WIDTH:100%;WIDTH:100%;} > IAME{BORR:NONE;MAX-WIDTH:100%;} > *{MAX-WIDTH:NONE !IMPORTANT;POSN:ABSOLUTE;HEIGHT:100% !IMPORTANT;WIDTH:100% !IMPORTANT;}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}"YOU KNOW I'M READY FOR ANYTHG TO HAPPEN / TAKE THIS PASSN, TURN TO ACTN / GET ME, FEEL ME, WANT ME / LIKE ME, LOVE ME, NEED ME..."{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}IF THERE'S ANYTHG I'VE LEARNED MY CREDIBLY SHORT LIFE, 'S THAT HEALG IS NOT SIMPLE, NOR IS ALWAYS A LEAR JOURNEY. IT'S FEELG GOOD AND THEN GREAT AND THEN ABSOLUTELY TERRIBLE. IT'S EARLY MORNGS SOLU AND LATE NIGHTS WH THE WRONG PEOPLE. IT'S A GLASS OF WATER AND A BOTTLE OF WE, HAPPY TEARS AND DNKEN SOBS. I'D BE LYG IF I SAID MY BROKEN HEART IS PLETELY MEND. BUT THAT'S KD OF THE BETY OF THIS, ISN'T ? I'M REPAIR, AND THAT'S {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}AND DAMN , I'M READY FOR ANYTHG TO {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;CLEAR:BOTH;}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;MARG:0 TO;WIDTH:90%;M-WIDTH:288PX;MAX-WIDTH:1440PX;M-HEIGHT:194PX;}LATT NEWS

TEGAN AND SARA RELL 'PROS AND CONS' OF GROWG UP GAY THE '90S: 'IT WAS EASIER SOME WAYS'

So was easier some ways to be a teenager and be gay if you were fortable wh jt not talkg about .

MY EXTREMELY GAY ADOLCENCE, AS TOLD THROUGH TEGAN AND SARA SONGSAS A TEEN FUMBLG MY WAY THROUGH MY QUEERNS, THE QU SISTERS ALWAYS HAD MY BACK. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, YOU GODDAMN {FONT:NORMAL 800 1.2REM/1.2 "D BOLD",SANS-SERIF;TEXT-TRANSFORM:NORMAL;LOR:HER;DISPLAY:LE-BLOCK;PADDG-BOTTOM:6PX;POSN:RELATIVE;TEXT-TRANSFORM:UPPERSE;}{BACKGROUND:#89308A;BOTTOM:0;NTENT:'';DISPLAY:BLOCK;HEIGHT:2PX;LEFT:0;POSN:ABSOLUTE;RIGHT:0;-WEBK-TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;WIDTH:100%;}{LEFT:51%;RIGHT:51%;WIDTH:0;}{FONT:NORMAL 800 1.2REM/1.2 "D BOLD",SANS-SERIF;TEXT-TRANSFORM:NORMAL;LOR:HER;DISPLAY:LE-BLOCK;PADDG-BOTTOM:6PX;POSN:RELATIVE;TEXT-TRANSFORM:UPPERSE;}{BACKGROUND:#89308A;BOTTOM:0;NTENT:'';DISPLAY:BLOCK;HEIGHT:2PX;LEFT:0;POSN:ABSOLUTE;RIGHT:0;-WEBK-TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;WIDTH:100%;}{LEFT:51%;RIGHT:51%;WIDTH:0;}LIFEBY SAM MANZELLASEPTEMBER 19, 2018/12:53 {HEIGHT:HER;DISPLAY:-WEBK-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-FLEX;DISPLAY:-MS-FLEXBOX;DISPLAY:FLEX;POSN:RELATIVE;-WEBK-FLEX-WRAP:WRAP;-MS-FLEX-WRAP:WRAP;FLEX-WRAP:WRAP;-WEBK-ALIGN-EMS:CENTER;-WEBK-BOX-ALIGN:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-ALIGN:CENTER;ALIGN-EMS:CENTER;-WEBK-BOX-PACK:CENTER;-WEBK-JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-PACK:CENTER;JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-WEBK-TRANSFORM-ORIG:CENTER;-MS-TRANSFORM-ORIG:CENTER;TRANSFORM-ORIG:CENTER;} IMG{HEIGHT:100%;WIDTH:100%;OBJECT-F:VER;}{HEIGHT:1789PX;WIDTH:2412PX;}MICHAEL BUCKNER/GETTY IMAG FOR LOGOLOS ANGELES, CA - APRIL 13: (L-R) SARA QU AND TEGAN QU OF TEGAN AND SARA ATTEND THE 2013 NEWNOWNEXT AWARDS AT THE FONDA THEATRE ON APRIL 13, 2013 LOS ANGEL, CALIFORNIA. (PHOTO BY MICHAEL BUCKNER/GETTY IMAG FOR LOGO)BY SAM MANZELLASEPTEMBER 19, 2018 / 12:53 PM{"@NTEXT":","@TYPE":"NEWSARTICLE","HEADLE":"MY EXTREMELY GAY ADOLCENCE, AS TOLD THROUGH TEGAN AND SARA SONGS","THUMBNAILURL":","DATEPUBLISHED":"2018-09-19T16:53:12.000+0000","DATEMODIFIED":"2018-09-19T16:53:12.000+0000","IMAGE":{"@NTEXT":","@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT","URL":","WIDTH":1920,"HEIGHT":1080},"URL":","THOR":{"@TYPE":"ORGANIZATN","NAME":"LOGO TV"},"MAENTYOFPAGE":{"@TYPE":"WEBPAGE","@ID":"},"PUBLISHER":{"@TYPE":"ORGANIZATN","@ID":","NAME":"LOGO TV","URL":","LOGO":{"@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT"}},"CREATOR":"SAM MANZELLA","KEYWORDS":"OPN","ARTICLESECTN":"LIFE"}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}TODAY, SISTERS-SLASH-BANDMAT TEGAN AND SARA QU, ARGUABLY CANADA'S GREATT AND GAYT CLAIM TO FAME, TURN 38. IN MY EXTREMELY BIASED OPN, EVERY DAY IS A GOOD DAY TO CELEBRATE THEIR CREDIBLE AND EXTENSIVE DISGRAPHY, BUT THAT'S EVEN MORE TE {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}TO HONOR THE BIRTH OF MY MOST CHERISHED QUEER INS, I'VE DUG EP TO MY MEMORY FOR SEVEN FORMATIVE MOMENTS OM MY MSY-BUT-WONRFUL GAY YOUTH—AND THE TEGAN AND SARA TRACKS THAT MA GROWG UP QUEER A LTLE EASIER. THE SISTERS QU HAVE BEEN THERE FOR ME OM THE START: I FOUND THE CON, THEIR VERABLE MASTERPIECE OF AN DIE ROCK ALBUM OM '07, WHEN I WAS 13. COUNTLS LISTENS LATER, THAT ALBUM STILL SLAPS HARR THAN MOST. IN SOME OF MY DARKT MOMENTS, MA ME FEEL LIKE I WAS ACTUALLY, GENUELY GOG TO BE {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}RIGHT THE FEELS, MAN!{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}TEGAN AND SARA, IF YOU'RE READG THIS, THANK YOU. FOR EVERYTHG. HAPPY EAKG {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}EARLY ONSET GAY PANIC/ "WALKG WH A GHOST"{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-FLEX;DISPLAY:-MS-FLEXBOX;DISPLAY:FLEX;-WEBK-BOX-PACK:CENTER;-WEBK-JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-PACK:CENTER;JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;POSN:RELATIVE;PADDG-BOTTOM:56.49999999999999%;} .TWTER-TWEET-RENRED, {M-WIDTH:65%;WIDTH:TO !IMPORTANT;} {WIDTH:100%;} {MARG-LEFT:TO !IMPORTANT;MARG-RIGHT:TO !IMPORTANT;} IMG{MAX-WIDTH:100%;WIDTH:100%;} > IAME{BORR:NONE;MAX-WIDTH:100%;} > *{MAX-WIDTH:NONE !IMPORTANT;POSN:ABSOLUTE;HEIGHT:100% !IMPORTANT;WIDTH:100% !IMPORTANT;}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}"I WAS WALKG WH A GHOST / AND I SAID PLEASE, PLEASE DON'T SIST"{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}DO YOU REMEMBER THE FIRST MOMENT YOU REALIZED YOU PROBABLY WEREN'T STRAIGHT? I DO. IN EIGHTH GRA, A IEND WAS TELLG ME ABOUT HER PROGRSIVE TERFAH CHURCH, WHERE YOUTH WHO GREW UP THE MUNY LEARNED ABOUT DIFFERENT FAHS, LIFTYL, AND INTI, CLUDG SEXUALY AND GENR INTY. (I WAS RAISED ROMAN CATHOLIC, SO THIS MA ME FEEL LIKE A LERAL EMBODIMENT OF THE EXPANDG BRA MEME.) SHE THEN REVEALED THAT SHE WAS QUTNG HER OWN SEXUALY. "GIRLS ARE JT SO... BETIFUL," SHE TOLD ME HALF-CRLOLY, AS IF SHE WERE NFSG THE THOUGHT ALOUD FOR THE FIRST TIME. "I N'T STOP LOOKG AT GIRLS AND THKG THEY'RE SO PRETTY AND SMART AND AMAZG. I DON'T THK MOST GIRLS LOOK AT GIRLS THAT WAY, YOU KNOW?"{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}I SED AND NODD, BUT MY HEART BEGAN TO RACE AS MY FIRST BABY-GAY PANIC SET : WA... THEY DON'T?{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}COMG OUT TO MYSELF/ "YOU WOULDN'T LIKE ME"{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-FLEX;DISPLAY:-MS-FLEXBOX;DISPLAY:FLEX;-WEBK-BOX-PACK:CENTER;-WEBK-JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-PACK:CENTER;JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;POSN:RELATIVE;PADDG-BOTTOM:75%;} .TWTER-TWEET-RENRED, {M-WIDTH:65%;WIDTH:TO !IMPORTANT;} {WIDTH:100%;} {MARG-LEFT:TO !IMPORTANT;MARG-RIGHT:TO !IMPORTANT;} IMG{MAX-WIDTH:100%;WIDTH:100%;} > IAME{BORR:NONE;MAX-WIDTH:100%;} > *{MAX-WIDTH:NONE !IMPORTANT;POSN:ABSOLUTE;HEIGHT:100% !IMPORTANT;WIDTH:100% !IMPORTANT;}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}"I FEEL LIKE I WOULDN'T LIKE ME IF I MET ME / I FEEL LIKE YOU WOULDN'T LIKE ME IF YOU MET ME..."{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}FAST-FORWARD TO MY SOPHOMORE YEAR OF HIGH SCHOOL. IT WAS SPRGTIME WASPY SUBURBAN WTCHTER COUNTY, NY. THE HORMON WERE A-RAGG, AND THE ANGST ME TOW. I'D SPENT ABOUT A YEAR GRAPPLG WH MY OWN ATTRACTN TO OTHER GIRLS AT SCHOOL. SHOVG DOWN SEEMED TO HELP—THAT IS, UNTIL IENDS BEGAN TO FLIRT WH EACH OTHER AND ASK EACH OTHER OUT. FORCED TO FACE MY OWN FEELGS WHEN IENDS ASKED SHYLY ABOUT WHO I "LIKED," I REALIZED I ULDN'T HOLD THE GAY {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}THAT YEAR, I PRIVATELY ME TO GRIPS WH MY QUEERNS. THOUGH I KNEW MY HEART OF HEARTS THAT NONE OF MY LOVED ON WOULD EVER REJECT ME FOR WHO I WAS, THE GRAVY OF BEG WEIRD, OF BEG DIFFERENT, SANK LIKE A LEAD WEIGHT THE P OF MY STOMACH. "YOU WOULDN'T LIKE ME," {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}COMG OUT TO THE WORLD/ "DARK COME SOON"{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-FLEX;DISPLAY:-MS-FLEXBOX;DISPLAY:FLEX;-WEBK-BOX-PACK:CENTER;-WEBK-JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-PACK:CENTER;JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;POSN:RELATIVE;PADDG-BOTTOM:75%;} .TWTER-TWEET-RENRED, {M-WIDTH:65%;WIDTH:TO !IMPORTANT;} {WIDTH:100%;} {MARG-LEFT:TO !IMPORTANT;MARG-RIGHT:TO !IMPORTANT;} IMG{MAX-WIDTH:100%;WIDTH:100%;} > IAME{BORR:NONE;MAX-WIDTH:100%;} > *{MAX-WIDTH:NONE !IMPORTANT;POSN:ABSOLUTE;HEIGHT:100% !IMPORTANT;WIDTH:100% !IMPORTANT;}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}"HOLD OUT FOR THE ON YOU KNOW WILL LOVE YOU / HI OUT OM THE ON YOU KNOW WILL LOVE YOU / YOU, YOU TOO..."{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}FOR ME, G OUT SEEMED TO HAPPEN SLOWLY, THEN ALL AT ONCE. I STARTED SMALL, NFIDG THOSE I KNEW I ULD TST WH MY MOST VULNERABLE NFSN—MY S. MY BT IEND. MY LTLE SISTER. BUT WORD SEEMED TO SPREAD LIKE WILDFIRE, AND BEFORE I KNEW , MY "SECRET" WASN'T SO SECRET ANYMORE. I'LL GIVE JUNR YEAR SAM SOME CRED WHERE CRED IS DUE: SHE HANDLED THE SOCIAL RAMIFITNS OF G OUT A MAJORY NSERVATIVE TOWN WH UNCHARACTERISTIC APLOMB, HOLDG HER HEAD UP HIGH DURG THE MOMENTS THAT MATTERED MOST. SHE ALSO CRIED A LOT. MA SOME QUTNABLE CHOIC. LET PEOPLE , PHED THEM {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}IT WAS A PROCS, AFTER ALL. SHE WAS 17. SHE WAS LEARNG HOW TO BE. {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}I'M 22 NOW. IT'S BEEN A FEW YEARS, BUT I'M STILL {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}UNREQUED LOVE/ "WHERE DO THE GOOD GO"{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-FLEX;DISPLAY:-MS-FLEXBOX;DISPLAY:FLEX;-WEBK-BOX-PACK:CENTER;-WEBK-JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-PACK:CENTER;JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;POSN:RELATIVE;PADDG-BOTTOM:75%;} .TWTER-TWEET-RENRED, {M-WIDTH:65%;WIDTH:TO !IMPORTANT;} {WIDTH:100%;} {MARG-LEFT:TO !IMPORTANT;MARG-RIGHT:TO !IMPORTANT;} IMG{MAX-WIDTH:100%;WIDTH:100%;} > IAME{BORR:NONE;MAX-WIDTH:100%;} > *{MAX-WIDTH:NONE !IMPORTANT;POSN:ABSOLUTE;HEIGHT:100% !IMPORTANT;WIDTH:100% !IMPORTANT;}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}"LOOK ME THE EYE AND PROMISE NO LOVE'S LIKE OUR LOVE / LOOK ME THE HEART AND UN-BREAK BROKEN, WON'T HAPPEN..."{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}YOU KNOW THAT AGE-OLD ADAGE ABOUT NEVER FETTG YOUR FIRST LOVE? WELL, I'M G HOT TO ADD THAT YOU NEVER FET YOUR FIRST UNREQUED LOVE, EHER. THIS ONE HURT LIKE A MOTHERFUCKER, THOUGH I'M HAPPY TO SAY I ME OUT OF THIS GAY FIAS RELATIVELY UNSTHED. HELL, THE GIRL QUTN IS STILL ONE OF MY CLOST AND ART IENDS. "WHERE DO THE GOOD GO?" NOT TOO FAR, APPARENTLY. I KNOW, I KNOW, I'M {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}FIRST REAL LOVE/ "NETEEN"{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-FLEX;DISPLAY:-MS-FLEXBOX;DISPLAY:FLEX;-WEBK-BOX-PACK:CENTER;-WEBK-JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-PACK:CENTER;JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;POSN:RELATIVE;PADDG-BOTTOM:75%;} .TWTER-TWEET-RENRED, {M-WIDTH:65%;WIDTH:TO !IMPORTANT;} {WIDTH:100%;} {MARG-LEFT:TO !IMPORTANT;MARG-RIGHT:TO !IMPORTANT;} IMG{MAX-WIDTH:100%;WIDTH:100%;} > IAME{BORR:NONE;MAX-WIDTH:100%;} > *{MAX-WIDTH:NONE !IMPORTANT;POSN:ABSOLUTE;HEIGHT:100% !IMPORTANT;WIDTH:100% !IMPORTANT;}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}"I FELT YOU MY LEGS / BEFORE I EVER MET YOU / AND WHEN I LAY BI YOU / FOR THE FIRST TIME I TOLD YOU / I FEEL YOU MY HEART AND I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU..."{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}AH, Y, THE MYSTIL WHIRLWD THAT IS FIRST LOVE. AND A WHIRLWD, WAS: I WAS NOT 19, BUT 18, A HMAN LLEGE WHOSE FIRST REAL GIRLIEND CHANGED THE GAME. I WON'T ELABORATE ON THE TAILS, BOTH BEE I RPECT MY EX'S PRIVACY AND BEE THE WHOLE THG IS TRAGILLY, EMBARRASSGLY GAY. IT'S THE GAYT THG EVER. JT PICTURE EVERY STUPID LBIAN STEREOTYPE YOU'VE EVER HEARD, AND YOU N PROBABLY SEE THE ENTIRE MS UNFOLD, M A FEW INTIFYG {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}WE WERE ENGAGED A YEAR . I WAS 19. NETEEN! SERLY, SAM? GET A {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}AND FIRST REAL HEARTBREAK/ "I WAS A FOOL"{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-FLEX;DISPLAY:-MS-FLEXBOX;DISPLAY:FLEX;-WEBK-BOX-PACK:CENTER;-WEBK-JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-PACK:CENTER;JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;POSN:RELATIVE;PADDG-BOTTOM:56.49999999999999%;} .TWTER-TWEET-RENRED, {M-WIDTH:65%;WIDTH:TO !IMPORTANT;} {WIDTH:100%;} {MARG-LEFT:TO !IMPORTANT;MARG-RIGHT:TO !IMPORTANT;} IMG{MAX-WIDTH:100%;WIDTH:100%;} > IAME{BORR:NONE;MAX-WIDTH:100%;} > *{MAX-WIDTH:NONE !IMPORTANT;POSN:ABSOLUTE;HEIGHT:100% !IMPORTANT;WIDTH:100% !IMPORTANT;}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}"I STUCK AROUND / I DID BEHAVE, I SAVED YOU EVERY TIME / I WAS A FOOL FOR LOVE / I WAS A FOOL FOR LOVE / I WAS A FOOL / I WAS A FOOL..."{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}AND THE FLIP SI: WHEN MY FIRST ROMANTIC RELATNSHIP EXPLOD MY FACE. I'D LET MY GOALS AND MY SIR GET LOST THE NEED TO PLEASE AND RE FOR MY PARTNER, SOMETHG I SPENT TOO LONG NYG. THE BREAKUP WAS MUTUAL THE RPECT THAT THE RELATNSHIP HAD REACHED S NATURAL END, AND WE BOTH KNEW . IT WAS NOT MUTUAL, HOWEVER, HOW WE PED THE AFTERMATH. FACED WH THE CSHG WEIGHT OF LOSG MY FIRST LOVE AND CLOST IEND, I CRASHED AND BURNED. NOT THE FUN "CRASH AND BURN," EHER. THE SUCKY KD. IT'S BEEN SOME TIME NOW, BUT STILL {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}I WAS A GODDAMN FOOL. LET'S BE REAL, THOUGH: AREN'T WE ALL FOOLS FOR LOVE? THE QU SISTERS SEEM TO THK {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}COMG OUT THE OTHER END/ "STOP DIRE"{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-FLEX;DISPLAY:-MS-FLEXBOX;DISPLAY:FLEX;-WEBK-BOX-PACK:CENTER;-WEBK-JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-PACK:CENTER;JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;POSN:RELATIVE;PADDG-BOTTOM:56.49999999999999%;} .TWTER-TWEET-RENRED, {M-WIDTH:65%;WIDTH:TO !IMPORTANT;} {WIDTH:100%;} {MARG-LEFT:TO !IMPORTANT;MARG-RIGHT:TO !IMPORTANT;} IMG{MAX-WIDTH:100%;WIDTH:100%;} > IAME{BORR:NONE;MAX-WIDTH:100%;} > *{MAX-WIDTH:NONE !IMPORTANT;POSN:ABSOLUTE;HEIGHT:100% !IMPORTANT;WIDTH:100% !IMPORTANT;}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}"YOU KNOW I'M READY FOR ANYTHG TO HAPPEN / TAKE THIS PASSN, TURN TO ACTN / GET ME, FEEL ME, WANT ME / LIKE ME, LOVE ME, NEED ME..."{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}IF THERE'S ANYTHG I'VE LEARNED MY CREDIBLY SHORT LIFE, 'S THAT HEALG IS NOT SIMPLE, NOR IS ALWAYS A LEAR JOURNEY. IT'S FEELG GOOD AND THEN GREAT AND THEN ABSOLUTELY TERRIBLE. IT'S EARLY MORNGS SOLU AND LATE NIGHTS WH THE WRONG PEOPLE. IT'S A GLASS OF WATER AND A BOTTLE OF WE, HAPPY TEARS AND DNKEN SOBS. I'D BE LYG IF I SAID MY BROKEN HEART IS PLETELY MEND. BUT THAT'S KD OF THE BETY OF THIS, ISN'T ? I'M REPAIR, AND THAT'S {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}AND DAMN , I'M READY FOR ANYTHG TO {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;CLEAR:BOTH;}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;MARG:0 TO;WIDTH:90%;M-WIDTH:288PX;MAX-WIDTH:1440PX;M-HEIGHT:194PX;}LATT NEWS

"But also, I got to have sleepovers wh my bt iend bee my mom didn't know I was gay and sleepg wh her.

"I mean, we joked at the begng when we got the green light for the show that we were jt hopg we uld fd tws at all, " Tegan says, addg: "We really hoped that the tws would be gay. ” Stori about how keepg the fact that they were gay om each other ed them to lash out their teens.

“I never sat down and talked about beg gay, or feelg shame, or homophobia, ” Tegan explaed.