Queer vs. Gay: How The Words Are Different, And Why It’s Important |

meaning of lgbt queer

Knowg how to talk about inti of genr and sexualy is key to unrstandg LGBTQ+ experienc. Learn the distctns between "queer" and "gay."

Contents:

QUEER VS. GAY: HOW THE WORDS ARE DIFFERENT, AND WHY IT’S IMPORTANT

* meaning of lgbt queer *

? SummaryIn the ntext of LGBTQ+ inty, the word gay is typilly ed reference to a person who is sexually and/or romantilly attracted to people of their own sex or genr. Some people may intify as both gay and queer, though others may e only one of the terms or a different term altogether.

You may have qutns about why some people intify as gay, queer, both, or another specific way.

LBIAN, GAY, BISEXUAL, TRANSGENR, QUEER, & INTERSEX LIFE

What do the Q stand for LGBTQ? What is queer theory? What do mean to be queer vers gay? Is there a sgle queer fn? And what about "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy"? Allow to help... * meaning of lgbt queer *

In this article, we will expla how the terms gay and queer are ed differently the ntext of sexualy and genr inty.

What is the difference between the words gay and queer? Both gay and queer are often ed as self-intifyg terms. In the ntext of sexual inty, the word gay is generally ed to mean “of, relatg to, or beg a person who is sexually or romantilly attracted to people of their own sex or genr.

*BEAR-MAGAZINE.COM* MEANING OF LGBT QUEER

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data-ttid="ContentHearContaer" class="ContentHearContaer-cGKRbE knDxNq"><div class="ContentHearHedAccredatnWrapper-GFiQf cDNVlV"><div data-ttid="ContentHearTleBlockWrapper" class="ContentHearTleBlockWrapper-cjmSKp eiGjZk"><div data-ttid="ContentHearRubric" class="ContentHearRubricBlock-LmpbT tPofh"><div data-ttid="ContentHearRubricDateBlock" class="ContentHearRubricDateBlock-kAQcZP fTFWxD"><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX gPBNpL bric ContentHearRubricContaer-eTudtt iRsSlw"><a class="RubricLk-gRWSOU cwyjHY bric__lk" href="/culture"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">Culture</span></a></div></div></div><h1 data-ttid="ContentHearHed" class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ ContentHearHed-NCyCC iUEiRd jdcWfa isouMH">9 LGBTQ+ People Expla How They Love, Hate, and Unrstand the Word "Queer"</h1></div><div class="ContentHearAccredatn-lfctVB etVsnJ ntent-hear__accredatn" data-ttid="ContentHearAccredatn"><div class="ContentHearDek-bIqFFZ eijTxK">In their own words, ne LGBTQ+ people expla what this divisive, liberatg term means to them.</div><div class="ContentHearByle-kmPyCa emiglw"><div class="ContentHearByleContent-dpPmNn DRFq"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl ContentHearByl-cZqgyJ bHLeKI"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH hdWCIC byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bCbgyH gnILss byle__preamble">By </span><a class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BaseLk-eNWuiM ByleLk-gEnFiw iUEiRd hSmufO skIR eErqIx byle__name-lk button" href="/ntributor/alexanr-chev">Alexanr Chev</a></span></span></p></div><time data-ttid="ContentHearPublishDate" dateTime="2023-06-14T13:30:00-04:00" class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ ContentHearPublishDate-eIBicG iUEiRd dCoEhu bDGyxQ">June 14, 2023</time></div></div><div 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href="mailto:?subject=9%20LGBTQ%2B%20People%20Expla%20How%20They%20Love%2C%20Hate%2C%20And%20Unrstand%20The%20Word%20%22Queer%22& rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank"><div class="SocialInContaer-huXzUC pMzVC social-ins__in-ntaer"><svg class="SocialInNetworkInComponent-cZaKGz dlOAhZ in in-email" focable="false" viewBox="0 0 32 32" width="32" height="32" xmlns="><tle>Email</tle><path d="M6 23h20V9H6v14zm3.631-12H22.37l-6.368 5.661L9.631 11zM24 12.227V21H8v-8.773l8.002 7.109L24 12.227z" fill-le="evenodd"></path></svg></div></a></li></ul></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></asi></hear></div><div data-attribute-verso-pattern="article-body" class="ArticlePageContentBackGround-cNiFNN kJkLmH article-body__ntent"><div class="ArticlePageChunksContent-etcMtP bwyLBj"><div data-ttid="ArticlePageChunks" class="ArticlePageChunks-fLyCVG eOdfIs"><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa bectqB body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p>I first me to know the word “queer” when I was 12, as I sashayed around the r to help my mother unload groceri. I said some sassy ment, some quip. She lifted her head, looked at me, and said, “Don’t act queer.” I n still feel the stg of her words.</p><p>How remarkable that, jt a few years later, a generatn of people would e to e a word once associated wh so much hate and vlence to arm ourselv. Today, the word “queer” is a way for to create space for those who have been othered by the LGBTQ+ rights movement, by social norms and ctoms, and by outdated notns of genr. Dependg on whom you ask, there are a ln nflictg meangs for the word. Many still see as a gradg slur. Many others embrace wh pri.</p><div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--article-mid-ntent" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--article-mid-ntent nsumer-marketg-un__slot---ntent"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></div><p>“Queer” is not the first word of s kd to be reclaimed. But unlike others, “queer” seems poised to reprent all of . It’s a word charged wh as many meangs, emotns, and historil perspectiv as there are shas of LGBTQ+ inty. </p><h2><strong>What do “queer” mean and what is s history?</strong> </h2><p>To give some historil ntext on the term, queer hasn’t always been ed as a way to scribe someone’s sexualy or genr inty. While many people today e as an umbrella term to scribe fluid sexuali and genrs, “queer” was (and, some ntexts, still is) a mon rogatory term thrown at <a href=">LGBTQ+ people</a>.    </p><div class="Contaer-bkChBi byNLHx"></div><p>Bee queer origally meant odd, strange, and unual, cisgenr straight people adopted as a way to sult and alienate LGBTQ+ folks. The <a data-offer-url=" class="external-lk" data-event-click="{"element":"ExternalLk","outgogURL":"" href=" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">first rerd e</a> of the term as a slur was 1894, when John Douglas, the 9th Marquis of Queensberry, lled his son Lord Aled Douglas and his alleged lover Osr Wil “Snob Queers” a public urt trial. Soon after, Amerin newspapers began g “queer” to refer to gay men disparagg articl, which troduced to the popular lexin.</p><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad---ntent"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot---ntent" data-no-id="8479tl"></div></div><p>After the <a href=">1969 Stonewall Rts</a>, which many nsir the birthplace of the morn <a href=">LGBTQ+ rights movement</a>, anizers began havg nversatns about what terms bt scribe our muny’s shared experienc. While gay people, lbians, and trans folks of all sexuali experience the world differently, cis-het society views all as “queer.” Organizatns like <a data-offer-url=" class="external-lk" data-event-click="{"element":"ExternalLk","outgogURL":"" href=" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">Queer Natn New York Cy</a> and dividuals alike began to reclaim the phrase as a term of empowerment and llective unifitn. This trend only gaed momentum the 1980s, when LGBTQ+ people were anizg agast the U.S. ernment’s handlg of <a href=">the HIV/AIDS crisis</a>. </p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB kNleGZ sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="Contaer-bkChBi byNLHx"></div><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="0j9if"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="6utk0d"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa bectqB body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p>“Queer” remaed an tra muny term throughout the 1990s, until found s way to the tle of a wily-viewed TV show, <a href="><em>Queer As Folk</em></a>, 1999. In the two s that followed, the term trickled to official nam of <a data-offer-url=" class="external-lk" data-event-click="{"element":"ExternalLk","outgogURL":"" href=" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">LGBTQ+ muny centers</a>, <a href=">TV shows and films</a>, and even the <a href=">growg acronym of inti</a> ed to jo together unr one roof. </p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-1 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p>The fn of “queer” has shifted over the years, and today, rather than beg a term that exclus, many see “queer” as an clive way to refer to the broad spectm of folks unr the LGBTQ+ umbrella. Some people fd rightfully difficult to shake the term’s rogatory history, even if s lloquial meang has shifted, but many others are reclaimg “queer” as a way to self-intify.</p><p>To e closer to unrstandg what “queer” means today, we sought ne perspectiv om those who e on what the term means to them.</p><div role="headg" aria-level="3" class="headg-h3"><strong>Tai Farnsworth, wrer (she/her)</strong></div><p>Growg up, I intified as bisexual. While I’m still fortable wh that term, don’t enpsulate the nuance of my sexualy. “Queer” feels better for me, bee what I tly am is bisexual and homoromantic.</p><p>Here’s what that means. While I fd cisgenr men attractive, I am not thentilly me when I date them. For me, “bisexual” means beg sexually attracted to all genrs and genr exprsns, but “homoromantic” means I only have romantic feelgs queer relatnships. Bee this is a ltle plex, I jt say “queer.”</p><asi aria-hidn="te" class="PullQuoteEmbedWrapper-sc-EoVjf fQbAzo"><div class="PullQuoteDerativeBorr-sc-iUyOLj fAzNVP"></div><div class="PullQuoteEmbedContent-sc-kTcfhx eoUd"><p>"Even as a slur, the word scribed those who exist outsi of what society mandat." — Steven "Z" Patton</p></div></asi><div role="headg" aria-level="3" class="headg-h3"><strong>Steven “Z” Patton, muny activist and public speaker (he/she/they)</strong></div><p>Inti are personal, but they are also how we advertise ourselv, so they are often very circumstantial, too. For example, I’m queer, trans, non-bary, and Mexin, and this is how I’d exprs myself to a partner. But when talkg to someone wh whom I have a rocky relatnship, I’ll simply be a “gay male.”</p><p>I’m 33. When I was a kid, “queer” was a pejorative. The neighborhood kids played a game lled “smear the queer.” You’d toss a football back and forth, and whoever ught was the “queer” for everyone to tackle. So y, queer-bashg was lerally a childhood rual.</p><p>In middle school, kids followed me home llg me “queer,” “fag,” and more. As an adult, I've been harassed wh the same slurs. So I unrstand why generatns before me balk at the word.</p><p>That said, I know how empowerg feels to reclaim words that have been ed to harm , and I appreciate “queer” specifilly bee has always rried a sense of unfed abstractns. Even as a slur, the word scribed those who exist outsi of what society mandat, so ’s ftg that the term now fi all rtrictns of love and self that the world has placed on .</p><div role="headg" aria-level="3" class="headg-h3"><strong>Kristy Zoshak, “queer wch” (she/her)</strong></div><p>I'm a 40-year-old woman who intifi as queer. In middle school, I knew I was attracted to guys and girls. I dated a few women before marryg a man. 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data-recirc-id="em-hed-4" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ jbVqqA summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">23 Thoughts I Had While Watchg Lea Michele <em>Funny Girl</em> on Broadway</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY dHMSJg summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH ecFEgL byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name">Jam Factora</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw gmWMTZ ad ad--asi"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--asi" data-no-id="izg5i8"></div></div></li></ul><div class="RecircMostPopularFooter-enPjgs laPXdt"></div></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="7xjebs"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa bectqB body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p>At this stage my life, given the experienc I've had, “queer” feels more clive to me. I know different people have different perspectiv, but for me, reprents an clive umbrella term that speaks to me.</p><div role="headg" aria-level="3" class="headg-h3"><strong>Daniel Reynolds, Social Media Edor at</strong> <em><strong>The Advote</strong></em> <strong>(he/him)</strong></div><p>As a synonym for “not straight,” “queer” is a great umbrella word for a wi variety of people across a spectm of sexual orientatns and genr inti. I love the clivy of the term, but for myself, I prefer “gay” for s specificy.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-2 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p>“Gay” clearly munit that I am a man who is terted other men. Moreover, my preference for "gay" speaks to my age. I'm 33, and “queer” wasn't wily ed when I was g out. I thk you'll fd an verse rrelatn between age and fort wh the “queer” label.</p><p>Prev generatns have a strong aversn to the term. As <em>The Advote</em>'s social media edor, I routely observe a backlash to “queer” (when 's ed a headle, for example) om olr gay men who only know the word as a slur. This is part of the term's history — was (and still is) a word ed to hurt that has been reclaimed.</p><p>Reclamatn is powerful, but I also unrstand how those who lived through some of the darkt days of legal and societal discrimatn are not fortable g a slur that was sometim ed alongsi physil vlence a celebratory way. Its age, even LGBTQ spac, is triggerg to some people.</p><div role="headg" aria-level="3" class="headg-h3"><strong>Vonte Abrams, visual merchandisg artist (they/them)</strong></div><p>Growg up, “queer” was not a term I heard weaponized — at least not as much as “faggot” — so I regnize that I lack a certa emotnal rponse associated wh s e.</p><p>For me, queerns enpass my sexual inty as someone unfortable wh bary prentatn. It also enpass my rebe of cisgenr and heteronormative privilege and the tersectn of the privileg wh whe privilege. LGBT+ labels tend to prume a bary origatn, and their age cis wh a social movement that seeks assiatn and eras the existence of non-bary inti. Usg “queer” as a tch-all umbrella term, whether tentnally or not, silenc that important ge voice.</p><p>My queerns enpass that voice, my voice, as a Black, male-assigned, non-bary dividual who harshly criqu the stat quo. I embrace “non-bary” bee I am naturally androgyno — puberty gave me a physil and emotnal blend of mascule and feme tras. I’ve learned over time that navigatg societal l of bary prentatn is always gog to be a unique challenge for me. “Queer” helps me face that challenge.</p><asi aria-hidn="te" class="PullQuoteEmbedWrapper-sc-EoVjf fQbAzo"><div class="PullQuoteDerativeBorr-sc-iUyOLj fAzNVP"></div><div class="PullQuoteEmbedContent-sc-kTcfhx eoUd"><p>"Queerns liberat me by showg me that livg non-normatively is healthy and valuable." — Chris Donaghue</p></div></asi><div role="headg" aria-level="3" class="headg-h3"><strong>Faati, tech scholar (she/they)</strong></div><p>I believe takg power back om words ed to humanize . I say “nigga” regularly and love beg able to say , bee remds me of the dual relatnship all black people hold wh our blackns. That joy of blackns is tied wh the sadns of knowg jt how much your people have suffered due to that blackns. So, I like the reclamatn of slurs. However, jt as I wouldn't ll every black person “nigga,” I wouldn't ll every LGBT person “queer,” only those who self-intify wh the term.</p><div role="headg" aria-level="3" class="headg-h3"><strong>Chris Donaghue, PhD, sex therapist and thor of</strong> <a data-offer-url=" class="external-lk" data-event-click="{"element":"ExternalLk","outgogURL":"" href=" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank"><em><strong>Rebel Love</strong></em></a> <strong>(he/him)</strong></div><p>“Queer” challeng the assumed bary of sexual and genr inty. Many e the term as beg synonymo wh “gay”, but to me, that miss s meang. “Queer” is about non-normativy, creativy, and diversy far beyond homonormative culture.</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="x4l06"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="RecircMostPopularWrapper-bRuGTi jkTTgR recirc-most-popular-wrapper viewport-monor-anchor"><div class="RecircMostPopularConter-jiViNn ktrplG recirc-most-popular-sparrow-trackg hi-asi-ad" data-most-popular-id="mod-most-popular-13"><div class="RecircMostPopularHeadg-iVzhzt jKtkdT">Most Popular</div><ul class="RecircMostPopularItems-dCAajf gqcRrp"><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff cedGRJ summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-33-66 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw jykXPG" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-1" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz hlQxkn"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Virgo Season Is Gog to Be Punishg. 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RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw gmWMTZ ad ad--asi"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--asi" data-no-id="5hndgr"></div></div></li></ul><div class="RecircMostPopularFooter-enPjgs laPXdt"></div></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="34ml1b"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa bectqB body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p>The gay inty stereotypilly wh expectatns around genr performance, polics, body standards, and sexual sir, and the feel opprsive to many people. For , “queer” allows for muny-buildg wh those who don’t subscribe to gay standards.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-3 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p>Queerns liberat me by showg me that livg non-normatively (livg outsi the ials of toxic masculy, femme-phobia, beg a top or a bottom, or solely datg cis men) is all healthy and valuable. I apply the lens of queerns to my work psychology, where I “queer” all that psychology, culture, and media have told about how to love, relate, exprs, and have sex.</p><asi aria-hidn="te" class="PullQuoteEmbedWrapper-sc-EoVjf fQbAzo"><div class="PullQuoteDerativeBorr-sc-iUyOLj fAzNVP"></div><div class="PullQuoteEmbedContent-sc-kTcfhx eoUd"><p>"The queer havg bareback sex the back room of a club might not intify wh the term ‘queer’ or thk of their actns as polil, but rejectg what society says they should be dog, they are queer." — Jason Orne</p></div></asi><div role="headg" aria-level="3" class="headg-h3"><strong>Lear D., IT profsnal (he/him)</strong></div><p>Seeg gay male iends reclaim “queer” mak me happy for them, but I’m still ambivalent about the term beg “reclaimed” (acquired? -opted? expand?) by younger generatns to mean anythg they want to mean.</p><p>On the one hand, I'm glad that younger people won't have to fight as hard as I did for clivy. On the other hand, I feel like I’m watchg youngsters steal history om those who stggled and died for and turn to somethg that is, at tim, both powerful and farcil.</p><p>I’m a trans man. When I was younger, I intified as “bisexual,” but now I intify as many thgs: transgenr, transsexual (I’m both), and more. I me to grips wh my genr inty when I was 38, began social transn 2018, and began medil transn last January. At this pot, I don't feel like any sexual entanglement I get to n be anythg but “queer.”</p><div role="headg" aria-level="3" class="headg-h3"><strong>Jason Orne, Asst. Profsor of Soclogy at Drexel Universy and thor of</strong> <a href="><em><strong>Boystown: Sex and Communy Chigo</strong></em></a> <strong>(he/him)</strong></div><p>As I discsed my book, “queer” has three overlappg (but not synonymo) meangs. The overlap between the meangs rults what I ll “nceptual flatn” of the term. Simply put, people e the word and intify wh , and they assume others mean the same way they do.</p><p>First, there is “queer” as an umbrella term. Rather than e the alphabet soup of LGBTQQIIAAPSS+, “queer” enpass any non-cisgenr, non-heterosexual inty, relatnship, behavr, or sire. I e “queer” this way bee I thk clus a wi variety of ways people are non-cisgenr and/or non-heterosexual.</p><p>That said, “queer” as an umbrella term do a lot of flatteng, and this flatteng is what certa people — namely those who intify wh “queer” as a kd of leftist polil stance of “inty-ls non-fn” — take issue wh. They don’t e “queer” as a term meang “all fns,” but rather as “no fn.” Sce everyone is unique their sir, behavrs, and muni, shouldn’t their inty be uniquely theirs? Some people e “queer” to mean this uniquens.</p><p>I say this age is leftist bee I’ve found associated wh a kd of ultra-left polil crique of power stctur (which often appears, as I and others have poted out, like a profound misreadg of Fouult). This is the queer you’ll see at a queer polil event, a queer wh an inty polics that often says, paradoxilly, that the tth about an issue n only e om someone wh the rrect batn of margalized inti to speak on said issue.</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="tfqn"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="RecircMostPopularWrapper-bRuGTi jkTTgR recirc-most-popular-wrapper viewport-monor-anchor"><div class="RecircMostPopularConter-jiViNn ktrplG recirc-most-popular-sparrow-trackg hi-asi-ad" data-most-popular-id="mod-most-popular-14"><div class="RecircMostPopularHeadg-iVzhzt jKtkdT">Most Popular</div><ul class="RecircMostPopularItems-dCAajf gqcRrp"><li><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff cedGRJ summary-em summary-em--has-borr summary-em--ARTICLE summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-si-by-si summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-33-66 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw jykXPG" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href=" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-1" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz hlQxkn"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg egpoQR summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Virgo Season Is Gog to Be Punishg. 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data-recirc-id="em-hed-4" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href=" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ jbVqqA summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">23 Thoughts I Had While Watchg Lea Michele <em>Funny Girl</em> on Broadway</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY dHMSJg summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH ecFEgL byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name">Jam Factora</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw gmWMTZ ad ad--asi"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--asi" data-no-id="2oozp8"></div></div></li></ul><div class="RecircMostPopularFooter-enPjgs laPXdt"></div></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="c917nh"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa bectqB body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p>It’s paradoxil bee the queer leftists are ually whe, and they pepper their events and issu wh a kd of “diversy by numbers” approach. I ll this approach “queernormativy.” Like heteronormativy, they intify a “right” way to be queer and argue that everyone else is dog queerns rrectly.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-4 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p>The third group of people who e “queer” reject that there is any right way to be queer, and this rejectn of any “right” way to do anythg is what mak them queer. This is “queer” as “queer sex radil,” a queerns rooted anti-rpectabily and foced on fun and pleasure. A queer this ve might not intify wh the term, but they reject the normal and are mted to livg an alternative liftyle that emphasiz pleasure a world of vlence.</p><p>The queer havg bareback sex the back room of a club might not intify wh the term “queer” or thk of their actns as polil, but rejectg what society says they should be dog, they are queer.</p><p>As I said, the terms are overlappg. I intify as queer: “queer” my rejectn of rpectabily, “queer” bee my inty don’t f wh simple box like “gay” or “man,” and “queer” bee I fall somewhere that umbrella of non-hetorosexual, non-cisgenr inti. I would tell a stranger I’m a “gay man” bee I assume they’re unprepared to unrstand that I’m neher.</p><p>“Queer” is all the thgs. And for some people, ’s none of them — ’s jt a slur thrown at for beg different. But I am different, and I like that.</p><p><em><strong>Get the bt of what’s queer.</strong></em> <a href=">Sign up for <em>Them</em>’s weekly newsletter here</a>.</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="dzk1pb"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 PaywallInleBarrierWhWrapperGrid-fyrGfS kLQIUk grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="body body__le-barrier article__body"><div class="ntaer ntaer--body"><div class="ntaer--body-ner"><asi class="PaywallInleBarrierWrapper-iBnuqk lfXXa-D" data-ttid="PaywallInleBarrierWrapper"><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--paywall-le-barrier" role="prentatn" aria-live="pole" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--paywall-le-barrier"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></asi></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ContentWrapperGrid-fvkmBv brYtrA grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="body body__ntaer"><div class="ntaer ntaer--body"><div class="ntaer--body-ner"></div></div></div></div></div></div></article><div class="ContentFooterWrapper-jVNdRG dTJkpP ArticlePageContentFooterGrid-ccsXYy eMZRHU 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summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href="/story/queery-genrqueer" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz hlQxkn"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet="(1) 120w, (1) 240w, (1) 320w, (1) 640w" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet="(1) 120w, (1) 240w, (1) 320w, (1) 640w" siz="100vw"/><img alt="InQueery: The History of the Word "Genrqueer" As We Know It" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="(1)"/></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent"><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX gPBNpL bric SummaryItemRubric-dguGKN lapGFj summary-em__bric"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">Culture</span></div><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM dVrbhU summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk--unrle-disable" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href="/story/queery-genrqueer" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ kBFaWv summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">InQueery: The History of the Word "Genrqueer" As We Know It</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY dHMSJg summary-em__byle"><div 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