</tle><path d="M58.55,52.13H5.13A5.13,5.13,0,0,1,0,47V5.13A5.13,5.13,0,0,1,5.13,0H58.55a5.13,5.13,0,0,1,5.13,5.13V47A5.13,5.13,0,0,1,58.55,52.13ZM5.13,4A1.13,1.13,0,0,0,4,5.13V47a1.13,1.13,0,0,0,1.13,1.13H58.55A1.13,1.13,0,0,0,59.67,47V5.13A1.13,1.13,0,0,0,58.55,4Z"></path><path d="M12.08,43.46H51.59A1.69,1.69,0,0,0,53,40.77l-5.45-7.4A1.69,1.69,0,0,0,45,33.15l-5.6,5.33-13-17.65a1.69,1.69,0,0,0-2.78.08l-13,19.94A1.69,1.69,0,0,0,12.08,43.46Z"></path><circle cx="44.13" cy="15.12" r="5.93"></circle></g></svg></div><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-directn-lumn--Rq7pk ontend-pencraft-Box-module__paddg-y-8--exiCC ontend-pencraft-Box-module__paddg-left-12--eE6bp"><h4 class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Text-module__size-16--fFowu ontend-pencraft-Text-module__le-height-20--p0dP8 ontend-pencraft-Text-module__weight-bold--Ps9DB 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7.12138 9.0705 7.39855 9.32101 7.73352C9.56221 8.05605 10.0191 8.12194 10.3416 7.88068C10.6641 7.63942 10.7299 7.18238 10.4887 6.85985C10.113 6.3574 9.63359 5.94165 9.08307 5.64081C8.53255 5.33997 7.92378 5.16107 7.29806 5.11625Z"></path></g></svg></div><div translated class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Text-module__size-14--Ume6q ontend-pencraft-Text-module__le-height-20--p0dP8 ontend-pencraft-Text-module__weight-normal--s54Wf ontend-pencraft-Text-module__font-text--QmNJR ontend-pencraft-Text-module__lor-sendary--WRADg ontend-pencraft-Text-module__ret--dW0zZ ontend-pencraft-Text-module__body4--Pl3xY">Copy lk</div></button><button tabInx="0" type="button" class="button share-actn"><div class="actn-in"><svg role="img" width="16" height="17" viewBox="0 0 16 17" fill="none" stroke-width="1.8" stroke="#000" xmlns="><g><tle></tle><path d="M10.6543 1.38723C10.3533 0.960814 9.95383 0.61341 9.48976 0.374567C9.02902 0.137956 8.51908 0.0130716 8.00115 0.0100098C7.86087 0.0101844 7.72354 0.0502687 7.60519 0.125581C7.48684 0.200893 7.39237 0.308324 7.3328 0.435326L5.00368 5.67077H3.029C2.72335 5.66964 2.42059 5.73003 2.13876 5.84833C1.85692 5.96663 1.60177 6.14043 1.38849 6.35938C1.16707 6.57502 0.991841 6.83346 0.873459 7.11897C0.755078 7.40447 0.696022 7.71108 0.699885 8.02014V13.691C0.699885 14.3087 0.945273 14.9012 1.38207 15.338C1.81886 15.7747 2.41128 16.0201 3.029 16.0201H13.348C13.8951 16.021 14.425 15.8283 14.8438 15.4762C15.2626 15.1241 15.5434 14.6352 15.6366 14.0961L16.6493 8.4252C16.7252 8.09192 16.7252 7.74582 16.6493 7.41254C16.566 7.08205 16.4104 6.7742 16.1936 6.51128C15.9746 6.25 15.7017 6.03926 15.3936 5.89355C15.0762 5.7467 14.7306 5.67068 14.3809 5.67077H10.5328L11.0391 4.37457C11.2397 3.88784 11.3162 3.35894 11.2619 2.83533C11.1853 2.30894 10.9763 1.81065 10.6543 1.38723ZM4.75052 14.5518H3.029C2.91049 14.5525 2.79303 14.5296 2.68349 14.4844C2.57394 14.4392 2.47452 14.3726 2.39102 14.2885C2.23609 14.1199 2.14945 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class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Text-module__size-14--Ume6q ontend-pencraft-Text-module__le-height-20--p0dP8 ontend-pencraft-Text-module__weight-normal--s54Wf ontend-pencraft-Text-module__font-text--QmNJR ontend-pencraft-Text-module__lor-sendary--WRADg ontend-pencraft-Text-module__ret--dW0zZ ontend-pencraft-Text-module__body4--Pl3xY">Facebook</div></button><button tabInx="0" type="button" class="button share-actn"><div class="actn-in"><svg role="img" width="21" height="16" viewBox="0 0 21 16" fill="none" stroke-width="1.8" stroke="#000" xmlns="><g><tle></tle><path fill-le="evenodd" clip-le="evenodd" d="M2.22192 2.20503C2.36754 1.77115 2.78269 1.45455 3.26639 1.45455H17.9332C18.4169 1.45455 18.8321 1.77118 18.9777 2.2051L10.5999 8.02107L2.22192 2.20503ZM2.16639 3.94198V13.4545C2.16639 14.0529 2.66307 14.5455 3.26639 14.5455H17.9332C18.5365 14.5455 19.0332 14.0529 19.0332 13.4545V3.94206L11.0204 9.50462C10.7679 9.67991 10.4318 9.67991 10.1793 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3.69543L0.444815 15.9303C0.0874636 17.264 0.878901 18.6348 2.21255 18.9922L5.37495 19.8396V7.66664C5.37495 6.40099 6.40096 5.37498 7.66661 5.37498H19.4723C19.3299 5.30548 19.1788 5.24858 19.0201 5.20604L6.785 1.92766Z" stroke="none"></path><path fill-le="evenodd" clip-le="evenodd" d="M8.44161 7.4C7.86632 7.4 7.39995 7.86637 7.39995 8.44167V22.1081C7.39995 22.6834 7.86631 23.1498 8.4416 23.1498L22.1083 23.15C22.6836 23.15 23.1499 22.6836 23.1499 22.1083V8.44167C23.1499 7.86637 22.6836 7.4 22.1083 7.4H8.44161ZM10.3999 9.65C9.84766 9.65 9.39995 10.0977 9.39995 10.65C9.39995 11.2023 9.84766 11.65 10.3999 11.65H18.3999C18.9522 11.65 19.3999 11.2023 19.3999 10.65C19.3999 10.0977 18.9522 9.65 18.3999 9.65H10.3999ZM10.3999 14.15C9.84766 14.15 9.39995 14.5977 9.39995 15.15C9.39995 15.7023 9.84766 16.15 10.3999 16.15H15.3999C15.9522 16.15 16.3999 15.7023 16.3999 15.15C16.3999 14.5977 15.9522 14.15 15.3999 14.15H10.3999Z" stroke="none"></path></g></svg></div><div class="pencraft 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ontend-pencraft-Text-module__weight-normal--s54Wf ontend-pencraft-Text-module__font-text--QmNJR ontend-pencraft-Text-module__lor-sendary--WRADg ontend-pencraft-Text-module__ret--dW0zZ ontend-pencraft-Text-module__body4--Pl3xY">Other</div></button></div></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="post-hear"><h1 class="post-tle unpublished">Beg Gay In Straight Spac</h1><h3 class="subtle">On Jt Thomas, And Never Turng Off</h3><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-directn-lumn--Rq7pk ontend-pencraft-Box-module__paddg-bottom-16--KVxKv"><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-directn-lumn--Rq7pk ontend-pencraft-Box-module__paddg-y-16--ohCEm"><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-jtify-start--_8fEd ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-align-center--rSd6h ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-gap-12--rODKq"><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt"><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flexGrow--mx4xz ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-align-center--rSd6h ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-gap-8--HFpIK facepile"><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-align-center--rSd6h"><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-align-center--rSd6h ontend-ponents-Facepile-module__fac--FVkdk ontend-ponents-Facepile-module__size-40--pH6IT"><div class="profile-hover-rd-target ontend-rear2-ProfileAndPublitnHoverCard-module__profileHoverCardTarget--Od_YL"><a href=" target="_blank" rel="noopener" class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flexAuto--CnX9I ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset=" /><img src=" siz="100vw" alt style="z-x: 1;" width="80" class="ontend-ponents-rponsive_img-module__img--Pgjj2 facepile-face ontend-ponents-Facepile-module__face--uAQkp ontend-ponents-Facepile-module__size-40--pH6IT ontend-ponents-Facepile-module__first--TZamh ontend-ponents-Facepile-module__last--DT3p3" /></picture></a></div></div></div></div></div><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-directn-lumn--Rq7pk"><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Text-module__size-11--k1e8b ontend-pencraft-Text-module__le-height-20--p0dP8 ontend-pencraft-Text-module__weight-medium--x7khA ontend-pencraft-Text-module__font-meta--U_nxy ontend-pencraft-Text-module__lor-pub-primary-text--RzL7j ontend-pencraft-Text-module__transform-upperse--IDkUL ontend-pencraft-Text-module__ret--dW0zZ ontend-pencraft-Text-module__meta--jzHdd"><div class="profile-hover-rd-target ontend-rear2-ProfileAndPublitnHoverCard-module__profileHoverCardTarget--Od_YL"><a href=" class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Text-module__ratn-hover-unrle--BEYAn ontend-pencraft-Text-module__ret--dW0zZ">Evan Scrimshaw</a></div></div><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-gap-4--zeW5_"><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Text-module__size-11--k1e8b ontend-pencraft-Text-module__le-height-20--p0dP8 ontend-pencraft-Text-module__weight-medium--x7khA ontend-pencraft-Text-module__font-meta--U_nxy ontend-pencraft-Text-module__lor-pub-sendary-text--OzRTa ontend-pencraft-Text-module__transform-upperse--IDkUL ontend-pencraft-Text-module__ret--dW0zZ ontend-pencraft-Text-module__meta--jzHdd">Jan 11, 2021</div></div></div></div></div><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flexGrow--mx4xz ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-jtify-space-between--NvIcg ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-align-center--rSd6h ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-gap-16--TpblU ontend-pencraft-Box-module__paddg-y-16--ohCEm ontend-pencraft-Box-module__borr-top-tail-themed--e17yZ ontend-pencraft-Box-module__borr-bottom-tail-themed--eVwFY post-ufi"><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-gap-8--HFpIK"><div class="like-button-ntaer post-ufi-button style-button"><a role="button" class="post-ufi-button style-button has-label 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class="luci luci-msage-circle"><path d="m3 21 1.9-5.7a8.5 8.5 0 1 1 3.8 3.8z"></path></svg></g></svg></a></div><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-gap-8--HFpIK"><a role="button" href="javascript:void(0)" class="post-ufi-button style-button no-in has-label wh-borr"><div class="label">Share</div></a></div></div></div></div><div class="visibily-check"></div><div class class><div class="available-ntent"><div dir="to" class="body markup"><p>Probably one of the harst thgs about beg gay is that you're always on. You're always aware of whose prence you're , and whether or not that person knows you're gay or not. You n know people for years as an openly gay person and have absolutely no ia if the other person knows or not. It's difficult, mostly bee you're the dark, and always havg to be "on".</p><p>In some spac - polics fely beg one - you're mostly okay lettg your guard down. You're much more surround by like md thkers, pecially amongst younger people. Even amongst the mp Conservativ I met my time at Universy, there was never an issue - we would routely mgle, and there was never any hatn or reticence to treat me as an equal. If we were tellg war stori, as were, then my war stori were as valuable as any others. It was a eeg feelg - a liberatg sense that n only be scribed as the moment you land after a long bs trip, except stead of the bs trip lastg two weeks, had been happeng sce you were 11 years old.</p><p>It was, and is, always a hard balance - of what to say and how to say , how to live as a gay man a straight world, how to be gay straight spac. The l for how to act, for how to be, for what I n and n't get away wh don't exist - societal norms and expectatns are all wrten for an dience I am not a part of. The are fairly menial problems, not parable to those faced by prev generatns, but they exist - there, gnawg at you as you try and figure out how to live your life. And then there are tim when you start to wonr whether your prence a space is wanted, or merely tolerated.</p><p><strong>…</strong></p><p>On Saturday, the Number 3 golfer the world, Jt Thomas, missed a short par putt at an event I wasn't even botherg to watch bee there was football on. That wasn't the notable part - what was was the fact that he said "faggot" rponse to that miss. When asked about after the round, Thomas gave a full and forthright apology, which is more than n be said for many people who have said that word prev ntexts, but still fuckg hurts. I love Thomas, and have rooted for his succs for six years now. His n wh iend Jordan Spieth at the 2018 Ryr Cup remas a highlight of my sports watchg life - the sheer joy of the two of them teractg, and the arrogance as they tore through the Europeans when nobody else uld - overjoyed me. And now jt sucks.</p><p>I n try and say that I thk he's a better person than this, and that 's jt a mistake, but that would be bullsh bee I like the guy. I didn't give Kobe or Rajon Rondo that benef of the doubt when they were found to have said the same word, and the reason why was simple - I didn't like eher of those players. I love JT as an athlete, so my bra go to tryg to exce , bee I don't want to believe or accept that someone who I want to succeed so much is a bad person.</p><p><span>Is this about Thomas? Sure, but 's not jt about Thomas. That stggle - of tryg to ratnalize and apologize for otherwise good people, or people you like - is jt the lowt stak versn of what beg gay straight spac is about. It's about beg dnk a bar and hearg your iend tell a fellow dnkard to "get off me, fag" as you both awkwardly manver a tight space. It's about gettg a text askg you to "tone down" while at a party, and then gettg the apologetic explanatn later that night. It's about beg the centre of attentn at a dner bee everyone sudnly thks that very vasive qutns about one's sex life, that I would no doubt be punched out for askg of straight people, are sudnly fair game. But most of all, 's acceptg all of that bee of fear - </span><em>what if they're as good as gets</em><span>.</span></p><p>Figurg out how to be gay a straight space is some ways harr than g terms wh what you are. I've known for g on 13 years I was gay, and I've never really been unsure about what meant or what I wanted. What was so unsure - and what kept me the closet for so long - was a fear that I wouldn't know how to live as an openly gay man a straight world. Havg been out for nearly 8 years, I still don't know much. What is clear, however, is that beg gay is acceptg l I don't set, and beg at the whim of people whose sensibili I know nothg of, and n't ntrol. And that is fuckg tirg.</p><p>I have no ia what the right sanctn for the PGA Tour should be, or what even uld be. Bar him om a uple of tournaments? Well, he isn't playg the next two weeks anyways, and even if you tried to force him to miss the next two weeks he was gog to play, that's easily manipulated - and, an off week for a golfer isn't much of a sanctn. Of urse, I like the guy and want to ntue to watch him play golf, so my stcts aren't exactly pure here. Were this someone I don't like (Patrick Reed, say), I have doubts about whether I'd be advotg leniency.</p><p>What I do know is that the problems won't go away jt bee gay people and alli pla about them on Twter. It's not jt about him g the word, as much as that hurts. It's about how gay people live a straight world, and our experience is fed by what we aren't. I don't get to jt be a sports fan, no - when you brg homophobia to a sport, I'm no longer the same as everyone else. Thomas end up losg the tournament by a stroke, and for the first time somethg like 5 years I was rootg agast him - somethg I never do.</p><p>Thomas' ase, offensive remark will probably be shortly fotten - I assume the plane ri home om Hawaii to Florida will be spent figurg out a large donatn he n make to buy himself some good will and prove this isn't who he is. That he will be dog so as much to protect his valuable endorsements as any generosy of spir will have to be fiven. But what shouldn't be fotten is that what ma Thomas' remarks so much worse is that his remarks ma people like me actively remember that no matter how hard we try, we don't ever get to be like everyone else. We don't get to turn off and fully relax, not even watchg the fuckg Tournament Of Champns, apparently. On a weekend after the week the world has had, all I wanted was to turn off my bra and jt relax, and is jt pure agony that even this thg that I love, and this athlete that I admire so, ma impossible to fet that I will always be Gay In Straight Spac.</p></div></div><div class="visibily-check"></div><div class="post-footer"><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flexGrow--mx4xz ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-jtify-space-between--NvIcg ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-align-center--rSd6h ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-gap-16--TpblU ontend-pencraft-Box-module__paddg-y-16--ohCEm ontend-pencraft-Box-module__borr-top-tail-themed--e17yZ ontend-pencraft-Box-module__borr-bottom-tail-themed--eVwFY post-ufi"><div class="pencraft ontend-pencraft-Box-module__ret--VfQY8 ontend-pencraft-Box-module__display-flex--ZqeZt ontend-pencraft-Box-module__flex-gap-8--HFpIK"><div class="like-button-ntaer 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