Gay Men and Their Mothers: Is There a Special Closens? | Psychology Today

Contents:

• GAY MEN AND THEIR MOTHERS: IS THERE A SPECIAL CLOSENS?
• MY MOM KNOWS I'M GAY, BUT SHE KEEPS TELLG ME TO MARRY A MAN AND HAVE KIDS. WHAT N I DO?
• AM I GAY?

GAY MEN AND THEIR MOTHERS: IS THERE A SPECIAL CLOSENS?

Perhaps is not surprisg that mothers and their gay sons often scribe their relatnships as close. However, beg gay might be a factor that mak some mothers and sons even closer. This was found to be te for many of the mothers and sons I terviewed for the study scribed the book: Comg Out, Comg Home: Helpg Fai Adjt to a Gay or Lbian Child ().

Neverthels, this closens uld have a downsi, at least temporarily, as many mothers ially blame themselv and the close relatnships for their sons' homosexualy. So, perhaps is not pletely surprisg that once they learned their sons were gay, some of the mothers I terviewed felt that they had done somethg to damage them. The fact is that I am the mother and I was told growg up that men bee gay bee their mothers are too motherg.

For a long time, the psychiatric profsn blamed overly close maternal relatnships for g the "disease" of male homosexualy. Even though rearch sce the 1950's has bunked , this theory persists people's mds and rears s ugly head for mothers when they ially learn their sons are gay.

MY MOM KNOWS I'M GAY, BUT SHE KEEPS TELLG ME TO MARRY A MAN AND HAVE KIDS. WHAT N I DO?

Fortunately, for many mothers of gay son—wh time and tn, they learn that the ia that they had somehow ma their son gay is ad wrong This was te of the mothers my study who also me to see the benefs havg a gay son as will be scribed later this post. Homosexualy to Blame for Close Relatnships wh Mother? My rearch, clil and personal experienc suggt that there is ed a al lk between male homosexualy and a close maternal relatnship but flows the oppose directn than what was prevly thought.

AM I GAY?

In other words, havg a close relatnship wh your mother don't make you gay—beg gay mak you closer to your mother. The young gay mal this study relled sharg terts mon wh their mothers, such as fashn and okg, and were also sensive to their feelgs.