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data-ttid="ContentHearContaer" class="ContentHearContaer-cGKRbE knDxNq"><div class="ContentHearHedAccredatnWrapper-GFiQf cDNVlV"><div data-ttid="ContentHearTleBlockWrapper" class="ContentHearTleBlockWrapper-cjmSKp eiGjZk"><div data-ttid="ContentHearRubric" class="ContentHearRubricBlock-LmpbT tPofh"><div data-ttid="ContentHearRubricDateBlock" class="ContentHearRubricDateBlock-kAQcZP fTFWxD"><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX gPBNpL bric ContentHearRubricContaer-eTudtt iRsSlw"><a class="RubricLk-gRWSOU cwyjHY bric__lk" href="/answers-and-advice/mental-health"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">Mental Health</span></a></div></div></div><h1 data-ttid="ContentHearHed" class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ ContentHearHed-NCyCC iUEiRd jdcWfa isouMH">8 Ways to Manage Social Anxiety, Acrdg to Queer Mental Health Practners</h1></div><div class="ContentHearAccredatn-lfctVB etVsnJ ntent-hear__accredatn" data-ttid="ContentHearAccredatn"><div class="ContentHearDek-bIqFFZ eijTxK">Social anxiety n make muny buildg and queer nightlife feel overwhelmg. Here are some tips to help.</div><div class="ContentHearByle-kmPyCa emiglw"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW jvZaPI rponsive-asset ContentHearContributorImage-cvjZXn epCAJC"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa ContentHearContributorImage-cvjZXn epCAJC rponsive-image"><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet=" 80w" siz="66px"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet=" 90w" siz="66px"/><img alt="" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></picture></span><div class="ContentHearByleContent-dpPmNn DRFq"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl ContentHearByl-cZqgyJ bHLeKI"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH hdWCIC byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bCbgyH gnILss byle__preamble">By </span><a class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BaseLk-eNWuiM ByleLk-gEnFiw iUEiRd hSmufO skIR eErqIx byle__name-lk button" href="/ntributor/maria-saldana">María Saldana </a></span></span></p></div><time data-ttid="ContentHearPublishDate" dateTime="2022-05-24T08:00:00-04:00" class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ ContentHearPublishDate-eIBicG iUEiRd dCoEhu bDGyxQ">May 24, 2022</time></div></div><div class="SocialInsWrapper-hKMEXV ffgPVr social-ins social-ins--standard ContentHearAccredatnSocialIns-jorO fPzfaa ntent-hear__social-share"><ul data-ttid="socialInslist" class="SocialInsList-cHVTIA ivmblD social-ins__list"><li class="SocialInsListItem-mbhR fxaFQj social-ins__list-em social-ins__list-em--twter social-ins__list-em--standard"><a aria-label="Share on Twter" class="external-lk SocialInExternalLk-huuzOU blkfJb social-ins__lk social-ins__lk--twter" data-event-click="{"element":"ExternalLk","outgogURL":"" href=" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank"><div class="SocialInContaer-huXzUC 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srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w, 960w, 1280w, 1600w, 1920w, 2240w" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Image may nta Drk Cocktail Alhol and Beverage" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></picture></div></div></span><div class="CaptnWrapper-jSZdqE hTTfoq ptn ContentHearLeadAssetCaptn-hPWmSN hfnsqH"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ CaptnText-bHjzlu iUEiRd kvieLQ iXWezO ptn__text">Social anxiety on a night out n make socializg feel impossible. </span><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ CaptnCred-ejegDm iUEiRd eNhSMp fNaHcW ptn__cred">Male Montoya</span></div></div></figure></div></div><asi class="PersistentAsiWrapper-VGrR oEIBz persistent-asi persistent-asi--align-left" style="posn:absolute;top:to;height:to" data-ttid="PersistentAsiWrapper"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jNgrSF sticky-box ContentHearPersistentAsi-fsnAmQ dFzKzm"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="SocialInsWrapper-hKMEXV ffgPVr 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aria-label="Share via Email" class="external-lk SocialInExternalLk-huuzOU etOOvH social-ins__lk social-ins__lk--email" data-event-click="{"element":"ExternalLk","outgogURL":"mailto:?subject=8%20Tips%20to%20Manage%20Social%20Anxiety%20From%20Queer%20Mental%20Health%20Practners&" href="mailto:?subject=8%20Tips%20to%20Manage%20Social%20Anxiety%20From%20Queer%20Mental%20Health%20Practners& rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank"><div class="SocialInContaer-huXzUC pMzVC social-ins__in-ntaer"><svg class="SocialInNetworkInComponent-cZaKGz dlOAhZ in in-email" focable="false" viewBox="0 0 32 32" width="32" height="32" xmlns="><tle>Email</tle><path d="M6 23h20V9H6v14zm3.631-12H22.37l-6.368 5.661L9.631 11zM24 12.227V21H8v-8.773l8.002 7.109L24 12.227z" fill-le="evenodd"></path></svg></div></a></li></ul></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></asi></hear></div><div data-attribute-verso-pattern="article-body" class="ArticlePageContentBackGround-cNiFNN kJkLmH article-body__ntent"><div class="ArticlePageChunksContent-etcMtP bwyLBj"><div data-ttid="ArticlePageChunks" class="ArticlePageChunks-fLyCVG eOdfIs"><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa bectqB body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p>Picture this: your iend DMs you a dazzlg flier on Instagram for a <a href=">new queer party</a> on Friday night. “We should totally go!” they msage gleefully. But where for many that vatn is excg, for some, sayg y to the plan creat a knot your stomach and tightns your cht.</p><p>You thk to yourself that 's jt eagerns yet the tightns don’t leave your body. When you get there, as much as you would love to talk to the cutie who has been lookg your way all night, the <a href=">anxiety</a> you’re experiencg rults a missed nnectn.</p><div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--article-mid-ntent" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--article-mid-ntent nsumer-marketg-un__slot---ntent"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></div><p>If this scrib you, you might have social anxiety. Social anxiety is a general sense of uneass, disfort, and fear when teractg wh other people or group settgs, acrdg to the <a href=">Mayo Clic</a>. It n manift as everythg om slight nervons to bilatg fear that prevents people om feelg fortable muny spac, gog to work, or dog daily tasks like gog to the lndromat.</p><div class="Contaer-bkChBi byNLHx"></div><p>While stayg n prevent people om experiencg triggers, many people livg wh social anxiety want to experience the world and build muny, and there are <a href=">ways to help alleviate</a> fears when they arise. We spoke to three experts about social anxiety, what is, where om, and their tips on how to manage on a night out.</p><h2><strong>What mak social anxiety different om social anxiety disorr?</strong></h2><p>While many people experience social anxiety at some pot their liv, the feelg is not all created equally. “There are two ways to thk about social anxiety,” says Dr. Della V. Mosley, psychologist and founr of the <a data-offer-url=" class="external-lk" data-event-click="{"element":"ExternalLk","outgogURL":"" href=" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">WELLS Healg Center</a>, a Florida-based healg llective. “I thk ’s important to talk about both bee not everyone has accs to a diagnosis, and not everyone needs to get one, but we n still talk about and when we might nsir gettg support for s symptoms.”</p><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad---ntent"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot---ntent" data-no-id="hqxzzl"></div></div><p>The first way to thk about is what people lloquially refer to as “social anxiety,” which n be scribed as feelg unfortable, nervo, tense, or tight social settgs or teractns wh others. Many people al wh some level of social anxiety throughout their liv whout necsarily havg an anxiety disorr.</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB kNleGZ sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="Contaer-bkChBi byNLHx"></div><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="5ogl2q"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="qpk6je"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa bectqB body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p>However, for people wh social anxiety disorr (SAD), this nervons n turn to a bilatg fear of social teractns. Acrdg to the <a href=">Diagnostic Statistics Manual of Mental Disorrs (DSM-5)</a>, SAD is a persistent fear or anxiety that occurs durg social suatns that n dispt your daily life. “To be labeled as a disorr, has to last for six months or more,” says Mosley.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-1 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p>For people who may need support for SAD, that fear n be so tense that they often prefer to avoid social gathergs altogether. It n also get the way of their daily liv by makg tasks like gog to the grocery store, work, or jt leavg the hoe feel impossible.</p><p>People who have social anxiety but don’t have SAD get anx, too, but to a lser gree. That said, “the experience n be very siar (to SAD) some ways,” says Mosley. “The person n be aaid to put themselv out there, and they thk a lot about social judgments. The fear is there.”</p><p>Treatment for SAD volv <a href=">gnive behavral therapy (CBT</a>) and/or meditn to manage symptoms. If your social anxiety feels bilatg, like 's preventg you om dog necsary everyday tasks, and you have accs, you should reach out to a mental health profsnal. However, there are thgs you n do on your own to help alleviate more d forms of social anxiety, and ease fears that may acpany social suatns.</p><asi aria-hidn="te" class="PullQuoteEmbedWrapper-sc-EoVjf fQbAzo"><div class="PullQuoteDerativeBorr-sc-iUyOLj fAzNVP"></div><div class="PullQuoteEmbedContent-sc-kTcfhx eoUd"><p>"I thk of the number of vlenc that have impacted our Queer and Trans muni of lor on the big and small sle, and know mak hard for to move through the world sometim,” says Dr. Della V. Mosley.</p></div></asi><h2><strong>Where do social anxiety e om?</strong></h2><p>From blogil and hered factors to your faial environment and relatnships growg up, there are a slew of reasons why someone may have social anxiety. Certa everyday factors, like our race, queerns, or transns, n also have a profound impact on social anxiety.</p><p>Queer and trans people are often hyperaware when navigatg social spac and have unique negative experienc that n rult symptoms of anxiety. “I thk of folks beg lled by the wrong pronouns, or people makg assumptns about based on how we prent and engage, when n be difficult to show up fully every space for safety reasons,” says Juana Tera Rivera Capcha, MSW, LCSWA, and founr of <a data-offer-url=" class="external-lk" data-event-click="{"element":"ExternalLk","outgogURL":"" href=" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">PachaYaku Therapy</a>.</p><p>For QTBIPOC, navigatg nightlife n e wh amplified anxieti pound by the tersectn of racism, transphobia, and queerphobia, among other factors. Knowg that many spac, and even some queer spac, are not meant for n be an obstacle, particularly when not every <em>body</em> is read the same.</p><p>Mosley says many of her QTBIPOC clients have felt othered and margalized social settgs bee of their inti. “Havg experienc of past trmas n make you more likely to feel fear public spac. I thk of the number of vlenc that have impacted our Queer and Trans muni of lor on the big and small sle and know mak hard for to move through the world sometim,” Mosley tells <em>Them</em>.</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="h0zss9"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="RecircMostPopularWrapper-bRuGTi jkTTgR recirc-most-popular-wrapper viewport-monor-anchor"><div class="RecircMostPopularConter-jiViNn ktrplG recirc-most-popular-sparrow-trackg hi-asi-ad" 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data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name">Jam Factora</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></li><li><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ RecircMostPopularSummaryItem-jQxxiw gmWMTZ ad ad--asi"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--asi" data-no-id="4egti"></div></div></li></ul><div class="RecircMostPopularFooter-enPjgs laPXdt"></div></div></div></div><div class="StickyBoxPlaceholr-grPmrg dxAvXx"></div></div></div></div><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan full-bleed-ad row-mid-ntent-ad"><div class="StickyMidContentAdWrapper-fSBzwl drzyIa ad-stickymidntent"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--mid-ntent should-hold-space"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--mid-ntent" data-no-id="mrfjv"></div></div></div></div><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK kHBDeH grid grid-margs grid-ems-2 ArticlePageChunksGrid-hfxa bjczjj grid-layout--adrail narrow wi-adrail"><div class="GridItem-buujkM stRKV grid--em grid-layout__ntent"><div class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa bectqB body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p>Beg hont about our dividual experienc by evaluatg our symptoms allows to tentnally center our wellns. “I thk a lot of the symptoms that we see social anxiety overlap wh symptoms of trma. It n be helpful to see a psychologist to sort out the different experienc and fd the bt pathway towards healg,” says Mosley.</p><asi aria-hidn="te" class="PullQuoteEmbedWrapper-sc-EoVjf fQbAzo"><div class="PullQuoteDerativeBorr-sc-iUyOLj fAzNVP"></div><div class="PullQuoteEmbedContent-sc-kTcfhx eoUd"><p>“Beg hont that you have anxiety social settgs n be a good first step,” says Rivera Capcha.</p></div></asi><h2><strong>How do we ease social anxiety when up?</strong></h2><p>Now that we know what social anxiety is, we n discs strategi to soothe . Many queer people wh social anxiety still strive to build muny and show up to queer spac. If you’re someone wh social anxiety and you sense the faiar feelgs of fear and dread bubblg up while out, here are a few profsnal tips. Whether or not you make out the door, preparg the ways are big and important steps<br/>worth celebratg.</p><div role="headg" aria-level="3" class="headg-h3"><strong>Normalize feelg anx</strong></div><p>Anxiety n be exacerbated by feelg like isn’t normal or mon to grapple wh social fear. “For me, one of the most important thgs is normalizg that you’re feelg anx,” says Rivera Capcha. “Especially now, wh the panmic, n feel difficult to socialize. Startg small is always an optn, like sayg y to smaller events. But beg hont that you have anxiety social settgs n be a good first step.”</p><div role="headg" aria-level="3" class="headg-h3"><strong>Mdfully prepare</strong> <strong>to be social</strong></div><p>“For people that live wh social anxiety, preparg for an event n make the actual event more manageable,” says Ajare A. McMillan, who scrib themself as “the <a data-offer-url=" class="external-lk" data-event-click="{"element":"ExternalLk","outgogURL":"" href=" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">Transformative Jtice Therapist</a>. Workg out logistics like havg sh, knowg who you're gog wh, and transportatn n help alleviate any strsful last-mute cisn makg and anxiety. “I remend dog mdfulns work before you go out,” Mosley adds, notg that apps like <a data-offer-url=" class="external-lk" data-event-click="{"element":"ExternalLk","outgogURL":"" href=" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">Calm</a>, <a data-offer-url=" class="external-lk" data-event-click="{"element":"ExternalLk","outgogURL":"" href=" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">Headspace</a>, and the <a data-offer-url=" class="external-lk" data-event-click="{"element":"ExternalLk","outgogURL":"" href=" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">CHANI App</a> n make easy to get started. “Fd breathwork and medatn to ground yourself prr and return to when need.”</p><div role="headg" aria-level="3" class="headg-h3"><strong>Have a plan</strong></div><p>So: you’ve done the mdfulns work, you’ve asked yourself why you’re gog to the event, and you’ve asssed what ntrol you have the settg. Now, ’s time to thk of a plan for when thgs feel out of ntrol. This plan is gog to be personal and unique for you, which n volve nnectg wh your sens, leang on muny, and takg space when you need . What works for your iend or partner(s) may not be what you need.</p><div role="headg" aria-level="3" class="headg-h3"><strong>Connect wh your sens</strong></div><p>Mosley and Rivera Capcha both remend nnectg wh your sens when thgs feel strsful, which n ground you your body and prevent anx thoughts om spiralg out of ntrol. “For me, I tend to rely on feelg and touch. Sometim I’ll have a pen my hand when I’m at events,” says Rivera Capcha.</p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="hralh"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--display-rail"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="RecircMostPopularWrapper-bRuGTi jkTTgR recirc-most-popular-wrapper viewport-monor-anchor"><div class="RecircMostPopularConter-jiViNn ktrplG recirc-most-popular-sparrow-trackg hi-asi-ad" data-most-popular-id="mod-most-popular-2"><div class="RecircMostPopularHeadg-iVzhzt jKtkdT">Most Popular</div><ul 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class="BodyWrapper-kufPGa bectqB body body__ntaer article__body" data-journey-hook="client-ntent" data-ttid="BodyWrapper"><div class="body__ner-ntaer"><p>Other people may try to pay attentn to sensatns of hot or ld, like a ld drk. Some others may prefer sight, scent, and sound. “When I fd myself gettg anx at a social event, I look at ems the room and I spell them forwards and backwards,” says Mosley. Usg the techniqu n distract you om your own thoughts, hopefully until your anx feelgs pass.</p><div role="headg" aria-level="3" class="headg-h3"><strong>Figure out which pg mechanisms ground you, and don’t be aaid to experiment wh them</strong></div><p>Contue to check wh yourself as the night go on. What do you notice is helpg you e back to the space? “Fdg the right pg strategi for you tak a ltle work. You may need to tt out 30 strategi and that’s okay, but tt them out! That is so important,” says Mosley. Beg patient wh yourself and the procs go a long way.</p><div role="headg" aria-level="3" class="headg-h3"><strong>Lean on Communy</strong></div><p>Our loved on n be people we go to for support when we feel anx. Mosley remends “sharg what is hard for you and what helps you those moments so others n jt be wh you,” says Mosley. The people we’re wh n help remd that we are servg of takg and makg space, even when n feel difficult to do so.</p><div class="GenericCalloutWrapper-tojWn iezhXq llout--has-top-borr" data-ttid="GenericCallout"><div class="ContentCardEmbedWrapper-kULtsE iGAJsG ntent-rd-embed ntent-rd-embed--stacked" data-ttid="ContentCardEmbedWrapper"><div class="ContentCardEmbedImage-iwqgVw jlIubp ntent-rd-embed__image" data-ttid="ContentCardEmbedImage"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW jvZaPI rponsive-asset"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa rponsive-image"><img alt="Image may nta: Text, and Word" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src=" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w" siz="100vw"/></picture></span></div><div class="ContentCardEmbedInfo-bDftKl bGnSrq"><div class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ ContentCardEmbedHed-kJVPGC iUEiRd gFmvMS cewqFA ntent-rd-embed__hed" data-ttid="ContentCardEmbedHed"><a class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BaseLk-eNWuiM ContentCardEmbedHedLk-eXLwe iUEiRd gFmvMS hRaEiJ eFUKSb ntent-rd-embed__hed-lk" href="/story/self-re-tips-queer-healers-ronavis" data-ttid="ContentCardEmbedHedLk">11 Self-Care Tips, Acrdg to Expert Queer Healers</a></div><div data-ttid="ContentCardEmbedDek" class="ContentCardEmbedDek-bA-DKch hXdQfY">Through terviews wh over a dozen expert queer healers — cludg tradnal psychologists, sex therapists, personal traers, reiki masters and hypnotists — we’ve piled a gui for self-re durg the sry tim.</div></div></div></div><div role="headg" aria-level="3" class="headg-h3"><strong>Take space if you need </strong></div><p>Sometim beg surround by people we love and re about nnot take away our anxiety. “For folks who are more troverted, puttg space between your outgs n prevent you om gettg burnt out and allow you to recuperate,” says McMillan. “Beg tentnal about your alone time giv you an opportuny to reflect on your choic.”</p><div role="headg" aria-level="3" class="headg-h3"><strong>Deprs and self-re after the event</strong></div><p>McMillan also remends unwdg and havg a plan for after the event. “Part of that prsn is knowg what the next 24 hours look like for you. When do you end your night? Do you go to work the next day or take the day off?” It’s important to honor your boundari and give yourself grace, pecially when puttg yourself out there, so don’t be aaid to do what you need to to recuperate om social suatns.</p><div data-attr-viewport-monor="le-recirc" class="le-recirc-wrapper le-recirc-observer-target-2 viewport-monor-anchor"></div><p><em><strong>Get the bt of what’s queer.</strong></em> <a href=">Sign up for <em>Them</em>’s weekly newsletter here.</a></p></div></div></div><div class="GridItem-buujkM fVLMby grid--em grid-layout__asi"><div class="StickyBoxWrapper-jfYB jxBcTH sticky-box"><div class="StickyBoxPrimary-dzWDWL cdhYoN sticky-box__primary"><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ ad ad--rail"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--rail" data-no-id="22hq0a"></div></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--display-rail" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot 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href="/tags/mental-health" class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BaseLk-eNWuiM TagCloudLk-kvjZFu iUEiRd hSmufO fWJQiy hIhJOI"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ TagCloudName-eAUnLd iUEiRd gSGCJB bUkXwu">mental health</span></a><a href="/tags/anxiety" class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BaseLk-eNWuiM TagCloudLk-kvjZFu iUEiRd hSmufO fWJQiy hIhJOI"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ TagCloudName-eAUnLd iUEiRd gSGCJB bUkXwu">anxiety</span></a><a href="/tags/queer-nightlife" class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BaseLk-eNWuiM TagCloudLk-kvjZFu iUEiRd hSmufO fWJQiy hIhJOI"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ TagCloudName-eAUnLd iUEiRd gSGCJB bUkXwu">queer nightlife</span></a><a href="/tags/mental-health-awarens-month" class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BaseLk-eNWuiM TagCloudLk-kvjZFu iUEiRd hSmufO fWJQiy hIhJOI"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ TagCloudName-eAUnLd iUEiRd gSGCJB bUkXwu">Mental Health Awarens Month</span></a></div></div></div></div><div data-ttid="ContentFooterBottom" class="ContentFooterBottom-jwWZfC kcbyiW"><div class="ntent-bottom-anchor"></div><div class="ConsumerMarketgUnThemedWrapper-iUTMTf jssHut nsumer-marketg-un nsumer-marketg-un--article-footer" role="prentatn" aria-hidn="te"><div class="nsumer-marketg-un__slot nsumer-marketg-un__slot--article-footer"></div><div class="journey-un"></div></div><div data-attr-viewport-monor="" class="recirc-list-wrapper viewport-monor-anchor"><div class="RowWrapper-UmqTg HEhan ContentFooterRelated-kEBiFe kVUuwq"><div class="GridWrapper-cAzTTK eRggVV grid grid-margs grid-ems-0 SummaryCollectnGridComponent-ktyEog bdTTVU summary-llectn-grid RecircListDefltOverlaySummaryCollectnGrid-AHJhY bEaXiL recirc-list__ems summary-llectn-grid--four-lumns summary-llectn-grid--TextBelowLeft"><div class="GridItem-buujkM kHPPIF grid--em"><div class="SummaryCollectnGridContent-eVUpRm gOErDJ"><div class="SectnTleRoot-dBGvdq iEHvtl SummaryCollectnGridSectnTle-fCmYwG izjbVn" data-ttid="SectnTle"><hear class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ SectnTleHed-dKqZet dxqEAa dvxNrX jttyjJ">Read More</hear></div><div class="SummaryCollectnGridItems-DZShR jbbmwr hi-read-more-ad" data-ttid="SummaryCollectnGridItems"><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff gjCHLu summary-em summary-em--has-le summary-em--article summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-text-below summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-50-50 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard SummaryCollectnGridSummaryItem-WColm hCwuiO" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href="/story/trans-people-mental-health-own-hands-microdosg-psychelics-psychiatry" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-1" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Trans People Are Takg Mental Health Into Our Own Hands" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent"><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX gPBNpL bric SummaryItemRubric-dguGKN lapGFj summary-em__bric"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">Communy</span></div><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM dVrbhU summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk--unrle-disable" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-1" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href="/story/trans-people-mental-health-own-hands-microdosg-psychelics-psychiatry" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ kBFaWv summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">Trans People Are Takg Mental Health Into Our Own Hands</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY dHMSJg summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH ecFEgL byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bCbgyH gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>P.E. Moskowz</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff gjCHLu summary-em summary-em--has-le summary-em--article summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-text-below summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-50-50 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard SummaryCollectnGridSummaryItem-WColm hCwuiO" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href="/story/self-re-tips-queer-healers-ronavis" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w" siz="100vw"/><img alt="11 Self-Care Tips, Acrdg to Expert Queer Healers" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent"><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX gPBNpL bric SummaryItemRubric-dguGKN lapGFj summary-em__bric"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">Mental Health</span></div><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM dVrbhU summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk--unrle-disable" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-2" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href="/story/self-re-tips-queer-healers-ronavis" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ kBFaWv summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">11 Self-Care Tips, Acrdg to Expert Queer Healers</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY dHMSJg summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH ecFEgL byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bCbgyH gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Wren Sanrs</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff gjCHLu summary-em summary-em--has-le summary-em--article summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-text-below summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-50-50 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard SummaryCollectnGridSummaryItem-WColm hCwuiO" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href="/story/queer-lennials-beg-fay-regivers" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Queer Millennials Are Beg Fay Caregivers. We Aren’t Ready" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent"><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX gPBNpL bric SummaryItemRubric-dguGKN lapGFj summary-em__bric"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">Communy</span></div><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM dVrbhU summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk--unrle-disable" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-3" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href="/story/queer-lennials-beg-fay-regivers" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ kBFaWv summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">Queer Millennials Are Beg Fay Caregivers. We Aren’t Ready</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY dHMSJg summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH ecFEgL byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bCbgyH gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Kyle Casey Chu</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="AdWrapper-dQtivb fZrssQ SummaryCollectnGridSummaryItem-WColm hCwuiO ad ad--read-more"><div class="ad__slot ad__slot--read-more" data-no-id="5bztbb"></div></div><div class="SummaryItemWrapper-iwvBff gjCHLu summary-em summary-em--has-le summary-em--article summary-em--no-in summary-em--text-align-left summary-em--layout-placement-text-below summary-em--layout-posn-image-left summary-em--layout-proportns-50-50 summary-em--si-by-si-align-center summary-em--si-by-si-image-right-mobile-false summary-em--standard SummaryCollectnGridSummaryItem-WColm hCwuiO" role="button" tabx="0"><div class="SummaryItemAssetContaer-gwhFFH VOyg summary-em__asset-ntaer"><a class="SummaryItemImageLk-dshqxb cPpCwE summary-em__image-lk summary-em-trackg__image-lk" href="/story/-bloom-thorn-molass-offerg-self-fense-tools-trag-trans-muny" aria-hidn="te" tabx="-1" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-image-4" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" target="_self"><span class="SpanWrapper-umhxW kGxnNB rponsive-asset SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image"><div data-tt="aspect-rat-ntaer" class="AspectRatContaer-bJHpJz cCcPgL"><div class="aspect-rat--overlay-ntaer"><picture class="RponsiveImagePicture-cWuUZO dUOtEa SummaryItemRponsiveAsset-hjGIGg bDvSkO summary-em__image rponsive-image"><noscript><source media="(max-width: 767px)" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w" siz="100vw"/><source media="(m-width: 768px)" srcSet=" 120w, 240w, 320w, 640w" siz="100vw"/><img alt="Meet the Organizers Offerg Self-Defense Tools and Trag to the Trans Communy" class="RponsiveImageContaer-eybHBd fptoWY rponsive-image__image" src="></noscript></picture></div></div></span></a></div><div class="SummaryItemContent-eiDYMl XMZX summary-em__ntent"><div class="RubricWrapper-dKmCNX gPBNpL bric SummaryItemRubric-dguGKN lapGFj summary-em__bric"><span class="RubricName-fVtemz cLxcNi">Communy</span></div><a class="SummaryItemHedLk-civM dVrbhU summary-em-trackg__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk summary-em__hed-lk--unrle-disable" data-ponent-type="recirc-river" data-recirc-id="em-hed-4" data-recirc-pattern="summary-em" href="/story/-bloom-thorn-molass-offerg-self-fense-tools-trag-trans-muny" target="_self"><div data-ttid="ClampWrapper" class="ClampWrapper-kZxfkB hTTNGO clamp SummaryItemHedBase-hiFYpQ kBFaWv summary-em__hed"><div class="ClampContent-hilPkr jVhSBH"><div class="SummaryItemHedTag-TWblf gxaOcP" data-ttid="SummaryItemHed">Meet the Organizers Offerg Self-Defense Tools and Trag to the Trans Communy</div></div></div></a><div class="SummaryItemByleWrapper-boCfbi cuRXdL summary-em__byle-date-in"><div class="SummaryItemBaseByle-fFbXkY dHMSJg summary-em__byle"><div class="summary-em__byle__ntent"><div data-ttid="BylWrapper" class="BylWrapper-KIudk irTIfE byl"><p class="ByleWrapper-jWHrLH ecFEgL byle byl__byle" data-ttid="ByleWrapper" emProp="thor" emType="><span emProp="name" class="ByleNamWrapper-jbHncj fuDQVo"><span data-ttid="ByleName" class="ByleName-kwmrLn cYaBaU byle__name"><span class="BaseWrap-sc-gjQpdd BaseText-ewhhUZ BylePreamble-iJolpQ iUEiRd bCbgyH gnILss byle__preamble">By </span>Eva Reign</span></span></p></div></div></div></div></div></div></div><div class="SummaryCollectnGridToActnWrapper-gnReGN 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