When Gay Men (Mis)Marry Straight Women: Bonnie Kaye's Story | Psychology Today

Contents:

• 'DID I EVER REALLY KNOW HIM?': THE WOMEN WHO MARRIED GAY MEN
• WHEN GAY MEN (MIS)MARRY STRAIGHT WOMEN: BONNIE KAYE'S STORY
• IS MY HBAND GAY? SIGNS OF A GAY HBAND
• ‘HONEY, I’VE GOT A SECRET’ : WHEN GAY MEN E OUT TO THEIR WIV

'DID I EVER REALLY KNOW HIM?': THE WOMEN WHO MARRIED GAY MEN

Megan Holgate uldn’t que believe where she was the height of the Aids crisis and she was the wag room of an ner-cy STI clic, equented by those most at risk of HIV: gay men, jectg dg ers, sex, as she had been, a monogamo married had felt “too ashamed” to ask her doctor for the HIV tt. A posive rult, back then, would have been a ath the clic a iendly gay unsellor asked Megan to step to his room and asked her if everythg was OK. “This poor gay guy was the target for all my built-up anger.

WHEN GAY MEN (MIS)MARRY STRAIGHT WOMEN: BONNIE KAYE'S STORY

As her dad pulled up she opened her purse, fat wh not, and phed them all to the bewilred man’s hands before beg whisked is one of a potentially dyg breed of women: those who married closeted gay men. “Some women ntact the service before their hband is even aware they know he’s gay, ” she says.

Never once did she spect he was gay. I’m not gay but really nfed and I thk I need you to move back to Atralia so I n work myself out.

IS MY HBAND GAY? SIGNS OF A GAY HBAND

Lucy, now 24, hid at school the fact her dad was gay. I don’t believe bisexualy, I thk he was gay, ” she says.

“When you love someone and you know you’re gay, you don’t marry them. And many of the men, embolned by the sense of eedom and h excement afford them by disverg the gay scene, pletely scrib the impact had on her children.

‘HONEY, I’VE GOT A SECRET’ : WHEN GAY MEN E OUT TO THEIR WIV

“My sons’ iends would e over and ask, is your dad gay? ”Siarly, Patricia took issue wh the blok who took her hband out for a beer so they didn’t look homophobic. ”Jt like many gay men do, their wiv n go through nial perds, Roxanne says, believg they n work thgs out.

“I know my hband is gay, he n’t stop himself om beg wh men, ’s impossible.