The very first time I wrote about Glee for VF Daily, way back 2009, I lled both “the gayt show on televisn” and “the penultimate stage the homosexual takeover of Ameri.” But fyg all expectatns (and nventns), the past 12 months, has bee faggier. This is tly e for celebratn! And what better way to show our reverence than wh what might be the world’s gayt Top 10 list? Read on for our image-rich untdown of the Ten Gayt Glee Moments of 2010 (and a bon: the unexpectedly Not Gayt Moments).
Contents:
- 'GLEE' STAR CHRIS COLFER SAYS HE WAS 'ABSOLUTELY TERRIFIED' TO PLAY A GAY CHARACTER ON THE SHOW BEE HE WASN'T OUT YET
- IN ITS FAL SEASON, GLEE WAS THE GAYT SHOW THAT’S EVER BEEN ON TELEVISN
- 2010’S GAYT GLEE MOMENTSBY BRETT BERKDECEMBER 15, 2010SAVE THIS STORYSAVESAVE THIS STORYSAVETHE VERY FIRST TIME I WROTE ABOUT GLEE FOR VF DAILY, WAY BACK 2009, I LLED BOTH “THE GAYT SHOW ON TELEVISN” AND “THE PENULTIMATE STAGE THE HOMOSEXUAL TAKEOVER OF AMERI.” BUT FYG ALL EXPECTATNS (AND NVENTNS), THE PAST 12 MONTHS, HAS BEE FAGGIER. THIS IS TLY E FOR CELEBRATN! AND WHAT BETTER WAY TO SHOW OUR REVERENCE THAN WH WHAT MIGHT BE THE WORLD’S GAYT TOP 10 LIST? READ ON FOR OUR IMAGE-RICH UNTDOWN OF THE TEN GAYT GLEE MOMENTS OF 2010 (AND A BON: THE UNEXPECTEDLY NOT GAYT MOMENTS).SLOWDANCE [SEASON 1, EPISO 16 “HOME”]: AT THE ROLLER RK CUM KARAOKE BARET THAT APRIL RHOS SCREWED HER WAY TO OWNG, THE CHANTSE RAN THGS HER WAY—AND THAT MEANT, DURG UPL’ SKATE, VG THE FELLAS TO “GRAB A GAL. OR GRAB ANOTHER FELLA IF THAT’S THE WAY THE GOOD LORD MA YOU.” FET YOU, GWYNNY. BRG BACK APRIL RHOS!STRAIGHTENG UP [SEASON 1, EPISO 18 “LARYNGIS”]: IN A SPERATE AND MENTED ATTEMPT TO MAKE SENSE OF HIS SEXUALY, KURT DONNED CARHARTT DRAG, ATE CHILI DOGS, MA OUT WH BRTANY, AND SANG WHAT SOUND LIKE A CHEVY-TCK MERCIAL. LUCKILY, HE WAS AWOKEN OM THIS STRAIGHT STUPOR BY THE TASTE OF BRT’S LIP GLOSS (ROOT BEER!).MOST POPULARADAM SANDLER FDS LOW-KEY TRIUMPH YOU ARE SO NOT INVED TO MY BAT MZVAHBY SAVANNAH WALSHNETFLIX’S MURDGH MURRS IS OFFICIALLY RETURNG FOR SEASON 2: EXCLIVEBY SAVANNAH WALSHAND JT LIKE THAT: MICHAEL PATRICK KG KNOWS WHEN THE AUDIENCE TURNED ON CHE DIAZBY CHRIS MURPHYEXTREME MAKEOVER—BASEMENT EDN [SEASON 1, EPISO 20 “THEATRILY”]: IN PREPARATN FOR ROOMG WH HIS LT OBJECT, FN, KURT PERFORMED A DO-OVER ON HIS SUBTERRANEAN LAIR, RULTG A CASBAH THEME THAT LOOKED LIKE SOMETHG THE CHECHEN MOLLY RGWALD WOULD HAVE DONE TO HER BEDROOM IF PRETTY PK WERE A PLEA FOR MLIM SENTIALISM. FN, RATHER ACCURATELY, SCRIBED THE RENOVATN AS “FAGGY.”GAY MARRIAGE [SEASON 2, EPISO 8 “FURT”]: I HATE WEDDGS, AND I’M NO FAN OF CHURCH, BUT EVEN I TEARED UP AT FRANKENTEEN’S BROMANTIC ALTAR SPEECH AT BURT AND CAROLE’S NUPTIALS. STILL, I WISH KURT HAD GOTTEN HIS WISH, AND THEY’D BEEN ABLE TO RELEASE 300 LIVE DOV, FED SOLELY ON A DIET OF GLTER.MOST POPULARADAM SANDLER FDS LOW-KEY TRIUMPH YOU ARE SO NOT INVED TO MY BAT MZVAHBY SAVANNAH WALSHNETFLIX’S MURDGH MURRS IS OFFICIALLY RETURNG FOR SEASON 2: EXCLIVEBY SAVANNAH WALSHAND JT LIKE THAT: MICHAEL PATRICK KG KNOWS WHEN THE AUDIENCE TURNED ON CHE DIAZBY CHRIS MURPHYCOLD, YET HOT (BUT STILL CHILLY) [SEASON 2, EPISO 10, “A VERY GLEE CHRISTMAS”]: KURT AND BLAE’S DUET WAS AS CLOSE TO A PERFECT GAY DATE AS TWO SHOW-TRASH-LOVG YOUNG MEN ULD GET WH THEIR CLOTH ON, THOUGH PROMPTED THE QUTN: WHAT BASE IS LOOKG-AT-ONE-ANOTHER-WH-THE-KD-OF-LONGG-THAT-SUGGTS-THAT-YOU-MIGHT-SOON-HOLD-HANDS?HOMO HOGWARTS [SEASON 2, EPISO 6 “NEVER BEEN KISSED”]: OUR FIRST GLIMPSE SI DALTON AMY REVEALED EXACTLY WHAT WE EXPECTED: A BCE WEBER ABERCROMBIE PHOTO SHOOT, JT BEFORE EVERYONE TAK OFF THEIR CLOTH. I SMELL CHICKEN!MOST POPULARADAM SANDLER FDS LOW-KEY TRIUMPH YOU ARE SO NOT INVED TO MY BAT MZVAHBY SAVANNAH WALSHNETFLIX’S MURDGH MURRS IS OFFICIALLY RETURNG FOR SEASON 2: EXCLIVEBY SAVANNAH WALSHAND JT LIKE THAT: MICHAEL PATRICK KG KNOWS WHEN THE AUDIENCE TURNED ON CHE DIAZBY CHRIS MURPHYROCKY II [SEASON 2, EPISO 5 “THE ROCKY HORROR GLEE SHOW”]: I CHALLENGE YOU TO FD ONE THG THIS EPISO THAT WAS NOT AS QUEER AS A FAKE LOUIS VUTON BARREL BAG STUFFED WH THREE-DOLLAR BILLS.THE SU-ASIAN [SEASON 2, EPISO 1 “AUDN”]: IN WHICH THE NATURAL WONR THAT IS MIKE CHANG REVEALS YET ANOTHER PARABLE TALENT—ABS.MOST POPULARADAM SANDLER FDS LOW-KEY TRIUMPH YOU ARE SO NOT INVED TO MY BAT MZVAHBY SAVANNAH WALSHNETFLIX’S MURDGH MURRS IS OFFICIALLY RETURNG FOR SEASON 2: EXCLIVEBY SAVANNAH WALSHAND JT LIKE THAT: MICHAEL PATRICK KG KNOWS WHEN THE AUDIENCE TURNED ON CHE DIAZBY CHRIS MURPHYTHE FULL ETHERIDGE [SEASON 2, EPISO 4 “DUETS”]: BRTANY AND SANTANA FALLY BUMPED SPANKY PANTS, BRGG MY SEND-MOST VAL GLEE FANTASY TO UN. SADLY, SPE THE EPISO’S TLE, THEY FAILED TO JO FORC TO SG MY LONG-REQUTED VERSN OF PRCE’S “COMPUTER BLUE.”CHORD OVERSTREET [SEASON 2, EVERY EPISO]: IN HIS PORTRAYAL OF TRANSFER STUNT SAM EVANS, CHORD RPORATED AN ALCHEMIL MIXTURE OF ADORABLENS, HUNKS, AND SHIRTLSNS THAT WAS LIKE A POTENT BATHTUB BATCH OF CRYSTAL METH: I SPENT EACH EPISO WAG FOR MY NEXT H. PL, HE SUBMTED GENIALLY TO THE MOST HUIATG TERVIEW EVER PERPETRATED, AND LET ME SHOOT VIO OF HIM DRIVG AROUND L.A., TOPLS. HERE’S HOPG HIS OBSSN WH ON-SCREEN PERSONAL HYGIENE NTU THE SEASON’S SEND HALF.BONUS: BEFORE YOU START PLAG ABOUT MY NOT CLUDG ANY OF THE FOLLOWG SEEMGLY HOMOPHILIC BS, ALLOW ME TO EXPLA WHY THEY DIDN’T MAKE THE CUT.BRTANY/MADGE/GAGA EPISOS: INHERENT CELEBRY-THEMED STUNT EPISOS SERVE NO REWARDS.SUE’S SUE-ON-SUE NUPTIALS: NARCISSISM IS NOT THE SAME AS LBIANISM.KURT AND RACHEL’S BABS/JUDY DUET: I STILL SAY ’S A MASH-UP, AND SPE GLEE MIC SUPERVISOR P. J. BLOOM’S SOUND ADVICE, MASH-UPS = ZERO STARS.BITE’S BURN: IF A POWER-LIFTG BULL DAGGER LIKE SHANNON BITEN’T BE A SAPPHIC SISTER ON THIS SHOW, WHO N?KAROFSKY’S BIG KISS: I ADORE MAX ADLER. BUT SEXUAL ASSLT ISN’T SEXY, UNLS ’S NSENSUAL.RELATED: MORE V.F. GLEE VERAGE THAN YOU N BEAR, CLUDG RE-PS, EXCLIVE TERVIEWS, VIOS, AND CRAZY FEATUR. YOU’VE GOT TWO MONTHS BEFORE THE NEXT EPISO. I CHALLENGE YOU TO READ THEM ALL!BRETT BERK WR GAILY ABOUT CULTURE, POLICS, AND RS FOR , AND IS THE THOR OF THE GAY UNCLE’S GUI TO PARENTG. VIS HIM AT OR FOLLOW HIM ON TWTER.BRETT BERK
- THE GAY GUI TO GLEE, SEASON THREE, EPISO FIVE: “THE FIRST TIME”BY BRETT BERKNOVEMBER 9, 2011SAVE THIS STORYSAVESAVE THIS STORYSAVEJT WHEN YOU THOUGHT GLEE WAS BACK ON TRACK—HAVG LEARNED ALL THE LSONS NEED ORR TO SUCCEED (EXCEPT, PERHAPS, REMAG FUNNY)— THROWS A GODDAMN THEME EPISO TO THE MIX. I REFER TO THIS WEEK’S FLEDGLG FORNITN-FT THLY, AND WH DISDA, NOT BEE I’M SOME SORT OF P. (FAR OM !) NOR DO I DO SO BEE I REJECT THE EPISO’S ANK—AND AT TIM, EVEN WELL-RENRED—PICTN OF THE STGGL THAT SURROUND TEENS’ PLUNGE TO THE FETID ZON BELOW THE BELTLE. RATHER, THE SHOW FELT LIKE A CHEAP NOVELTY ACT BEE THE KIDS’ EFFORTS AT LOS’ IT DID NOT FLOW ANILLY OM THE EMOTNAL TTHS OF THEIR RELATNSHIPS, OR THE STGGL THEY WERE UNRGOG. RATHER THE SUATNS WERE SORT OF FOIE-GRAS-ED DOWN THEIR GULLETS (AND PANTS) SO THAT THE SHOW’S WRERS ULD E A LTLE CK AND GET SOME MEDIA ATTENTN.STILL, THE EPISO WAS NOT WHOUT S CHARMS. LET’S TAKE A LOOK AT THE PAIRGS AND SEE WHO GOT ON, AND WHO SIMPLY GOT OFF.RACHEL/FN: YOU MAY RELL THAT RACHEL AND FN HAVE BEEN TENTNALLY NOT HAVG SEX FOR ALMOST AS LONG AS THEY’VE BEEN GOG OUT. YOU MAY NOT REMEMBER WHY—I CERTALY DON’T. YET AS SPERATE, NNIVG, AND MONOMANIAL AS RACHEL IS ABOUT ADVANCG HER ACTG REER, IS NEHER BELIEVABLE NOR EVEN AMG TO IMAGE THAT SHE MIGHT BE “NVCED” TO TRY OUT TERURSE ORR TO BETTER HER PORTRAYAL OF A CHARACTER LIKE MARIA THE HIGH-SCHOOL PRODUCTN OF WT SI STORY. (IT IS, FACT, GROTQUE.)STILL, THIS IS WHAT THE WRERS, VIA ACCLAIMED DRAMATURGE ARTIE, SUGGT AS HER MOTIVATN. LIKEWISE, AS UNNIABLY GALLANT AS FN HAS BEEN KEEPG HIS PUPPY OUT OF RACHEL’S YARD, SO TO SPEAK, WHEN SHE FALLY SISTS THAT PH E TO SHOVE, SEEMS ABSURD TO IMAGE THAT HE WOULD TURN DOWN HER ADVANC SOLELY BEE OF THE CYNIL REASONG BEHD THEM. WHEN ALL GETS SORTED OUT, AND THEY FALLY DO DO , RACHEL’S “REEMG” CISN TO GIVE UP NOT OUT OF AN OVERWHELMG PHYSIL SIRE FOR FN, OR SOME SOCIALLY MOTIVATED GOAL OF IMPRSG HER IENDS—THE TWO RE CENTIV FOR TEENS—BUT RATHER AS A MEANS OF CHEERG UP FN FOLLOWG HIS REJECTN BY THE FOOTBALL SUTS OM OH STATE. (?!) WHILE I APPRECIATED THAT SHE, AS THE GIRL, WAS THE STIGATOR, ALL OF THIS FELT AS LIFELS AS A DISRD NDOM. ALSO, I WISH I ULD UN-SEE THAT *ENDLS LOVE*REMAKE THE TWO CREATED ONT OF THE FIREPLACE AT THE HUDSON/HUMMELS, AND UN-HEAR RACHEL’S CREEPY PLEDGE TO “GIVE FN SOMETHG NO ONE ELSE WILL EVER GET.”KURT/BLAE: EVEN MORE NONSENSIL WAS THE PRE-AL PAS OUR SHOW’S HOMO HERO ENDURED THIS WEEK. IF WE’RE TO BELIEVE THE NARRATIVE OFFERED UP HERE, THE TWO ARE THE ONLY GAY MEN WORLD HISTORY NOT TO HAVE SEX AFTER PARTAKG THE FOLLOWG SUREFIRE APHRODISIACS: LISTENG TO “LOVE IS THE DG”; TALKG ABOUT TAYLOR LTNER; MEETG AN ADORABLE, AVAILABLE, AND TERTED THIRD; AND GETTG DNK AND DANCG TOGETHER AT A DRAG BAR. I RPECT THAT KURT DID NOT WANT HIS FIRST TIME TO BE THE BACK SEAT OF A TOYOTA CAMRY THE PARKG LOT OF SNDALS—NOT BEE THAT ISN’T HOT, BUT BEE FS WH HIS CHARACTER’S IMPOSSIBLE AND NAïVE LONGG FOR IALIZED ROMANTIC LOVE. SIARLY, I N UNRSTAND HOW BLAE WOULD WANT TO RPECT KURT’S UN-SIRO SIRE FOR THEM TO NOT GET NAKED, GIVEN ALL THE LAC, STRAPS, STREAMERS, BOWS, HOOKS, CLAMPS, AND ELASTIC FASTENERS THIS WOULD REQUIRE UNDOG OM SWEET PORCELA’S LAYERS OF “FASHN.” I EVEN GET HOW KURT IS JEALO OF ALL THE SOLICO ATTENTN THAT THE PROMISCUO NEWBIE TWK,SEBASTIAN, IS PAYG TO HIS BOBBLE-HEAD BOYIEND. WHAT I DON’T GET IS HOW BLAE, AFTER LIVG FOR YEARS AT WHAT IS PROBABLY THE LARGT CHICKEN FARM THIS SI OF SPRGDALE, ARKANSAS, ULD POSSIBLY HAVE BEEN A VIRG BEFORE THIS. IF WE’RE TO BELIEVE THE CLOSG MONTAGE, BY THE END OF THE EPISO HE ISN’T ANYMORE—THAT IS, IF LOSG ONE’S GAY VIRGY NSISTS SOLELY OF LYG UNR QUILTS AND WRAPPG ONE’S ARMS TENRLY AROUND ANOTHER MAN’S BARE BACK WHILE SHOW TUN PLAY THE BACKGROUND. AS THEY SAY CHECKERS, “QUEEN ME.”BITE/COOTER: I THK DOT MARIE JON IS AN UNTILIZED TREASURE. SO I THK SUCKS THAT EVERY TIME SHE’S AT THE CENTER OF A PLOTLE—LIKE THIS EPISO—SHE’S RELEGATED TO WRIGGLG ABOUT SI THE ONLY SAD SACK THE WRERS SEEM PABLE OF KNTG FOR HER: THE HUNT FOR A MAN. THEREFORE, I DON’T WANT TO SAY TOO MUCH ABOUT THIS WEEK’S B VOLVG HER CHASTE LOVE FOR THE RECTANGULAR OH STATE BUCKEY FOOTBALL TALENT SUT WHO APPEARS AT MCKLEY TO REC SHANE (AND NOT REC FN), EXCEPT THAT IF THE WRERS ARE SO HELL-BENT ON NVCG THAT THE BITE IS STRAIGHT, WHY DID THEY GIVE HER SUOR THE NAME COOTER?__FOR PLAY:__WHY, THE NAME OF THE HOLY TRY (BERNSTE, SONDHEIM, AND LRENTIS) WERE THE PLAY’S OPENG-NIGHT PERFORMANC NOT SHOWN AS A PLAY— A LEAR FASHN, THE DORIUM, WH AN DIENCE—BUT RATHER ALL TERSPERSED WH THIS WEEK’S ANE SEXUAL GOGS-ON? IT WAS ALMOST AS IF THE SHOW’S CREATORS HAD FILMED A WHOLE SEPARATE EPISO ABOUT THE KIDS PUTTG ON *WT SI STORY,*AND SCRAPPED , BUT THEN RETURNED TO THE EDG ROOM AND CHECKER-BOARD ALL . IT WAS JARRG AND CHEAP, AND DID A DISSERVICEBOTH TO THE SHOW’S PATIENCE SETTG UP THE MIL—STEAD OF JT STG, REHEARSG, AND PERFORMG ONE EPISO—AND TO THE PERFORMANC THEMSELV, ALL OF WHICH TOOK ON THE VERY UNFORTUNATE FEEL OF A MASH-UP.MOST POPULARKYLE DCHANEL, THE ROTHSCHILD WHO WASN’TBY NATE FREEMANADAM SANDLER FDS LOW-KEY TRIUMPH YOU ARE SO NOT INVED TO MY BAT MZVAHBY SAVANNAH WALSHNETFLIX’S MURDGH MURRS IS OFFICIALLY RETURNG FOR SEASON 2: EXCLIVEBY SAVANNAH WALSH__BEAR-LY LEGAL:__I WAS SO HAPPY TO SEE DAVE KAROFSKY APPEAR THIS EPISO, NOT ONLY BEE I ADORE THE MENSCH-Y MAX ADLER, BUT BEE I LIKE THE IA OF HIS GARNERG SOME REMPTN, AND HIS NVERSATN WH KURT AT SNDALS OFFERED JT THIS. BEG A CLOSETED HIGH SCHOOLER IS NOTHG TO BE ASHAMED OF, SO LONG AS YOU’RE NOT JURG ANYONE ELSE. ADOLCENCE IS HARD ENOUGH. SO I THOUGHT HIS REVEAL ABOUT HIS MOTIVATNS FOR LEAVG MCKLEY—HE WANTED TO BE SOMEWHERE WHERE HE WASN’T KNOWN, AND ULD JT PLAY FOOTBALL AND BE A KID—WAS HANDLED SENSIVELY. ALSO GREAT: HIS PICTN OF HIS POPULARY AT SNDALS. IT’S NOT EVERY DAY THAT A YOUNG, GAY SHTARKER LIKE DAVE GETS TO EXPLITE THE TRICI OF THE BEAR SUBCULTURE TO EVERY TWEEN AND HOEWIFE MIDDLE AMERI.SONG RATGS (* TO *****)“TONIGHT” (WT SI STORY)* FEEL THE FIZZLE.“UPTOWN GIRL” (BILLY JOEL)** UPTOWN GURRL, MAYBE. SEND STAR FOR SHEER DACY.“A BOY LIKE THAT” (WT SI STORY)* THE ACCENTS THIS RENDN KILLED CHA RIVERA. HAPPY, GLEE?“AMERI” (WT SI STORY)* WA, I THOUGHT I LIKED THE SONGS OM THIS SHOW?“ONE HAND, ONE HEART” (WT SI STORY) * THANKS FOR MAKG UNBEARABLY EXPLIC THE ONE HAND-JOB, ONE HARD-ON JOKE.GAYT MOMENTSNDALS!CATCHG UP ON THE SEASON'S REAPS? READ ;SGLEE ARCHIVE HERE.BRETT BERK
'GLEE' STAR CHRIS COLFER SAYS HE WAS 'ABSOLUTELY TERRIFIED' TO PLAY A GAY CHARACTER ON THE SHOW BEE HE WASN'T OUT YET
Kurt Elizabeth Hummel is a major character the h seri, Glee. He is the first openly gay character troduced the seri. In the begng of the seri, Kurt is the closet until he out to Merces Jon and eventually to his father, Burt. He tablish a csh on Fn Hudson... * glee gay episodes *
Kurt is the first gay character to e out season one of Glee, and is badly bullied for . However, Dave later reveals he is gay after tryg to kiss Kurt season two.
Standout Quote: "Odds are by the end of the school year, I'll have Blae and a Natnals trophy, and you'll have khakis and a Lima Bean apron, and that gay face.". Not only did he fy tradnal gay stereotyp by beg a football team ultra-jock, but Spencer was pletely shamels about his inty. "Glee" star Chris Colfer opened up about playg the openly gay character, Kurt, on a podst Thursday.
IN ITS FAL SEASON, GLEE WAS THE GAYT SHOW THAT’S EVER BEEN ON TELEVISN
"Glee" actor Chris Colfer, 32, opened up about his fear of playg an openly gay character on the h Fox seri durg Thursday's episo of the "And That's What You Really Missed", who portrayed a character named Kurt on the show om 2009 to 2015, shared that he was "absolutely terrified" bee he hadn't e out yet. And back then, people told their clients, 'Don't play gay characters bee will your reer, '" Colfer said.
"Colfer's character had many storyl that centered around his experience as a gay high school stunt. LGBT stands for Lbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgenr people rpectively. When Kurt eventually tells her that he is gay, she asks why he was not hont wh her.
2010’S GAYT GLEE MOMENTSBY BRETT BERKDECEMBER 15, 2010SAVE THIS STORYSAVESAVE THIS STORYSAVETHE VERY FIRST TIME I WROTE ABOUT GLEE FOR VF DAILY, WAY BACK 2009, I LLED BOTH “THE GAYT SHOW ON TELEVISN” AND “THE PENULTIMATE STAGE THE HOMOSEXUAL TAKEOVER OF AMERI.” BUT FYG ALL EXPECTATNS (AND NVENTNS), THE PAST 12 MONTHS, HAS BEE FAGGIER. THIS IS TLY E FOR CELEBRATN! AND WHAT BETTER WAY TO SHOW OUR REVERENCE THAN WH WHAT MIGHT BE THE WORLD’S GAYT TOP 10 LIST? READ ON FOR OUR IMAGE-RICH UNTDOWN OF THE TEN GAYT GLEE MOMENTS OF 2010 (AND A BON: THE UNEXPECTEDLY NOT GAYT MOMENTS).SLOWDANCE [SEASON 1, EPISO 16 “HOME”]: AT THE ROLLER RK CUM KARAOKE BARET THAT APRIL RHOS SCREWED HER WAY TO OWNG, THE CHANTSE RAN THGS HER WAY—AND THAT MEANT, DURG UPL’ SKATE, VG THE FELLAS TO “GRAB A GAL. OR GRAB ANOTHER FELLA IF THAT’S THE WAY THE GOOD LORD MA YOU.” FET YOU, GWYNNY. BRG BACK APRIL RHOS!STRAIGHTENG UP [SEASON 1, EPISO 18 “LARYNGIS”]: IN A SPERATE AND MENTED ATTEMPT TO MAKE SENSE OF HIS SEXUALY, KURT DONNED CARHARTT DRAG, ATE CHILI DOGS, MA OUT WH BRTANY, AND SANG WHAT SOUND LIKE A CHEVY-TCK MERCIAL. LUCKILY, HE WAS AWOKEN OM THIS STRAIGHT STUPOR BY THE TASTE OF BRT’S LIP GLOSS (ROOT BEER!).MOST POPULARADAM SANDLER FDS LOW-KEY TRIUMPH YOU ARE SO NOT INVED TO MY BAT MZVAHBY SAVANNAH WALSHNETFLIX’S MURDGH MURRS IS OFFICIALLY RETURNG FOR SEASON 2: EXCLIVEBY SAVANNAH WALSHAND JT LIKE THAT: MICHAEL PATRICK KG KNOWS WHEN THE AUDIENCE TURNED ON CHE DIAZBY CHRIS MURPHYEXTREME MAKEOVER—BASEMENT EDN [SEASON 1, EPISO 20 “THEATRILY”]: IN PREPARATN FOR ROOMG WH HIS LT OBJECT, FN, KURT PERFORMED A DO-OVER ON HIS SUBTERRANEAN LAIR, RULTG A CASBAH THEME THAT LOOKED LIKE SOMETHG THE CHECHEN MOLLY RGWALD WOULD HAVE DONE TO HER BEDROOM IF PRETTY PK WERE A PLEA FOR MLIM SENTIALISM. FN, RATHER ACCURATELY, SCRIBED THE RENOVATN AS “FAGGY.”GAY MARRIAGE [SEASON 2, EPISO 8 “FURT”]: I HATE WEDDGS, AND I’M NO FAN OF CHURCH, BUT EVEN I TEARED UP AT FRANKENTEEN’S BROMANTIC ALTAR SPEECH AT BURT AND CAROLE’S NUPTIALS. STILL, I WISH KURT HAD GOTTEN HIS WISH, AND THEY’D BEEN ABLE TO RELEASE 300 LIVE DOV, FED SOLELY ON A DIET OF GLTER.MOST POPULARADAM SANDLER FDS LOW-KEY TRIUMPH YOU ARE SO NOT INVED TO MY BAT MZVAHBY SAVANNAH WALSHNETFLIX’S MURDGH MURRS IS OFFICIALLY RETURNG FOR SEASON 2: EXCLIVEBY SAVANNAH WALSHAND JT LIKE THAT: MICHAEL PATRICK KG KNOWS WHEN THE AUDIENCE TURNED ON CHE DIAZBY CHRIS MURPHYCOLD, YET HOT (BUT STILL CHILLY) [SEASON 2, EPISO 10, “A VERY GLEE CHRISTMAS”]: KURT AND BLAE’S DUET WAS AS CLOSE TO A PERFECT GAY DATE AS TWO SHOW-TRASH-LOVG YOUNG MEN ULD GET WH THEIR CLOTH ON, THOUGH PROMPTED THE QUTN: WHAT BASE IS LOOKG-AT-ONE-ANOTHER-WH-THE-KD-OF-LONGG-THAT-SUGGTS-THAT-YOU-MIGHT-SOON-HOLD-HANDS?HOMO HOGWARTS [SEASON 2, EPISO 6 “NEVER BEEN KISSED”]: OUR FIRST GLIMPSE SI DALTON AMY REVEALED EXACTLY WHAT WE EXPECTED: A BCE WEBER ABERCROMBIE PHOTO SHOOT, JT BEFORE EVERYONE TAK OFF THEIR CLOTH. I SMELL CHICKEN!MOST POPULARADAM SANDLER FDS LOW-KEY TRIUMPH YOU ARE SO NOT INVED TO MY BAT MZVAHBY SAVANNAH WALSHNETFLIX’S MURDGH MURRS IS OFFICIALLY RETURNG FOR SEASON 2: EXCLIVEBY SAVANNAH WALSHAND JT LIKE THAT: MICHAEL PATRICK KG KNOWS WHEN THE AUDIENCE TURNED ON CHE DIAZBY CHRIS MURPHYROCKY II [SEASON 2, EPISO 5 “THE ROCKY HORROR GLEE SHOW”]: I CHALLENGE YOU TO FD ONE THG THIS EPISO THAT WAS NOT AS QUEER AS A FAKE LOUIS VUTON BARREL BAG STUFFED WH THREE-DOLLAR BILLS.THE SU-ASIAN [SEASON 2, EPISO 1 “AUDN”]: IN WHICH THE NATURAL WONR THAT IS MIKE CHANG REVEALS YET ANOTHER PARABLE TALENT—ABS.MOST POPULARADAM SANDLER FDS LOW-KEY TRIUMPH YOU ARE SO NOT INVED TO MY BAT MZVAHBY SAVANNAH WALSHNETFLIX’S MURDGH MURRS IS OFFICIALLY RETURNG FOR SEASON 2: EXCLIVEBY SAVANNAH WALSHAND JT LIKE THAT: MICHAEL PATRICK KG KNOWS WHEN THE AUDIENCE TURNED ON CHE DIAZBY CHRIS MURPHYTHE FULL ETHERIDGE [SEASON 2, EPISO 4 “DUETS”]: BRTANY AND SANTANA FALLY BUMPED SPANKY PANTS, BRGG MY SEND-MOST VAL GLEE FANTASY TO UN. SADLY, SPE THE EPISO’S TLE, THEY FAILED TO JO FORC TO SG MY LONG-REQUTED VERSN OF PRCE’S “COMPUTER BLUE.”CHORD OVERSTREET [SEASON 2, EVERY EPISO]: IN HIS PORTRAYAL OF TRANSFER STUNT SAM EVANS, CHORD RPORATED AN ALCHEMIL MIXTURE OF ADORABLENS, HUNKS, AND SHIRTLSNS THAT WAS LIKE A POTENT BATHTUB BATCH OF CRYSTAL METH: I SPENT EACH EPISO WAG FOR MY NEXT H. PL, HE SUBMTED GENIALLY TO THE MOST HUIATG TERVIEW EVER PERPETRATED, AND LET ME SHOOT VIO OF HIM DRIVG AROUND L.A., TOPLS. HERE’S HOPG HIS OBSSN WH ON-SCREEN PERSONAL HYGIENE NTU THE SEASON’S SEND HALF.BONUS: BEFORE YOU START PLAG ABOUT MY NOT CLUDG ANY OF THE FOLLOWG SEEMGLY HOMOPHILIC BS, ALLOW ME TO EXPLA WHY THEY DIDN’T MAKE THE CUT.BRTANY/MADGE/GAGA EPISOS: INHERENT CELEBRY-THEMED STUNT EPISOS SERVE NO REWARDS.SUE’S SUE-ON-SUE NUPTIALS: NARCISSISM IS NOT THE SAME AS LBIANISM.KURT AND RACHEL’S BABS/JUDY DUET: I STILL SAY ’S A MASH-UP, AND SPE GLEE MIC SUPERVISOR P. J. BLOOM’S SOUND ADVICE, MASH-UPS = ZERO STARS.BITE’S BURN: IF A POWER-LIFTG BULL DAGGER LIKE SHANNON BITEN’T BE A SAPPHIC SISTER ON THIS SHOW, WHO N?KAROFSKY’S BIG KISS: I ADORE MAX ADLER. BUT SEXUAL ASSLT ISN’T SEXY, UNLS ’S NSENSUAL.RELATED: MORE V.F. GLEE VERAGE THAN YOU N BEAR, CLUDG RE-PS, EXCLIVE TERVIEWS, VIOS, AND CRAZY FEATUR. YOU’VE GOT TWO MONTHS BEFORE THE NEXT EPISO. I CHALLENGE YOU TO READ THEM ALL!BRETT BERK WR GAILY ABOUT CULTURE, POLICS, AND RS FOR , AND IS THE THOR OF THE GAY UNCLE’S GUI TO PARENTG. VIS HIM AT OR FOLLOW HIM ON TWTER.BRETT BERK
After the game, Kurt nervoly tells to his dad that he is gay.
THE GAY GUI TO GLEE, SEASON THREE, EPISO FIVE: “THE FIRST TIME”BY BRETT BERKNOVEMBER 9, 2011SAVE THIS STORYSAVESAVE THIS STORYSAVEJT WHEN YOU THOUGHT GLEE WAS BACK ON TRACK—HAVG LEARNED ALL THE LSONS NEED ORR TO SUCCEED (EXCEPT, PERHAPS, REMAG FUNNY)— THROWS A GODDAMN THEME EPISO TO THE MIX. I REFER TO THIS WEEK’S FLEDGLG FORNITN-FT THLY, AND WH DISDA, NOT BEE I’M SOME SORT OF P. (FAR OM !) NOR DO I DO SO BEE I REJECT THE EPISO’S ANK—AND AT TIM, EVEN WELL-RENRED—PICTN OF THE STGGL THAT SURROUND TEENS’ PLUNGE TO THE FETID ZON BELOW THE BELTLE. RATHER, THE SHOW FELT LIKE A CHEAP NOVELTY ACT BEE THE KIDS’ EFFORTS AT LOS’ IT DID NOT FLOW ANILLY OM THE EMOTNAL TTHS OF THEIR RELATNSHIPS, OR THE STGGL THEY WERE UNRGOG. RATHER THE SUATNS WERE SORT OF FOIE-GRAS-ED DOWN THEIR GULLETS (AND PANTS) SO THAT THE SHOW’S WRERS ULD E A LTLE CK AND GET SOME MEDIA ATTENTN.STILL, THE EPISO WAS NOT WHOUT S CHARMS. LET’S TAKE A LOOK AT THE PAIRGS AND SEE WHO GOT ON, AND WHO SIMPLY GOT OFF.RACHEL/FN: YOU MAY RELL THAT RACHEL AND FN HAVE BEEN TENTNALLY NOT HAVG SEX FOR ALMOST AS LONG AS THEY’VE BEEN GOG OUT. YOU MAY NOT REMEMBER WHY—I CERTALY DON’T. YET AS SPERATE, NNIVG, AND MONOMANIAL AS RACHEL IS ABOUT ADVANCG HER ACTG REER, IS NEHER BELIEVABLE NOR EVEN AMG TO IMAGE THAT SHE MIGHT BE “NVCED” TO TRY OUT TERURSE ORR TO BETTER HER PORTRAYAL OF A CHARACTER LIKE MARIA THE HIGH-SCHOOL PRODUCTN OF WT SI STORY. (IT IS, FACT, GROTQUE.)STILL, THIS IS WHAT THE WRERS, VIA ACCLAIMED DRAMATURGE ARTIE, SUGGT AS HER MOTIVATN. LIKEWISE, AS UNNIABLY GALLANT AS FN HAS BEEN KEEPG HIS PUPPY OUT OF RACHEL’S YARD, SO TO SPEAK, WHEN SHE FALLY SISTS THAT PH E TO SHOVE, SEEMS ABSURD TO IMAGE THAT HE WOULD TURN DOWN HER ADVANC SOLELY BEE OF THE CYNIL REASONG BEHD THEM. WHEN ALL GETS SORTED OUT, AND THEY FALLY DO DO , RACHEL’S “REEMG” CISN TO GIVE UP NOT OUT OF AN OVERWHELMG PHYSIL SIRE FOR FN, OR SOME SOCIALLY MOTIVATED GOAL OF IMPRSG HER IENDS—THE TWO RE CENTIV FOR TEENS—BUT RATHER AS A MEANS OF CHEERG UP FN FOLLOWG HIS REJECTN BY THE FOOTBALL SUTS OM OH STATE. (?!) WHILE I APPRECIATED THAT SHE, AS THE GIRL, WAS THE STIGATOR, ALL OF THIS FELT AS LIFELS AS A DISRD NDOM. ALSO, I WISH I ULD UN-SEE THAT *ENDLS LOVE*REMAKE THE TWO CREATED ONT OF THE FIREPLACE AT THE HUDSON/HUMMELS, AND UN-HEAR RACHEL’S CREEPY PLEDGE TO “GIVE FN SOMETHG NO ONE ELSE WILL EVER GET.”KURT/BLAE: EVEN MORE NONSENSIL WAS THE PRE-AL PAS OUR SHOW’S HOMO HERO ENDURED THIS WEEK. IF WE’RE TO BELIEVE THE NARRATIVE OFFERED UP HERE, THE TWO ARE THE ONLY GAY MEN WORLD HISTORY NOT TO HAVE SEX AFTER PARTAKG THE FOLLOWG SUREFIRE APHRODISIACS: LISTENG TO “LOVE IS THE DG”; TALKG ABOUT TAYLOR LTNER; MEETG AN ADORABLE, AVAILABLE, AND TERTED THIRD; AND GETTG DNK AND DANCG TOGETHER AT A DRAG BAR. I RPECT THAT KURT DID NOT WANT HIS FIRST TIME TO BE THE BACK SEAT OF A TOYOTA CAMRY THE PARKG LOT OF SNDALS—NOT BEE THAT ISN’T HOT, BUT BEE FS WH HIS CHARACTER’S IMPOSSIBLE AND NAïVE LONGG FOR IALIZED ROMANTIC LOVE. SIARLY, I N UNRSTAND HOW BLAE WOULD WANT TO RPECT KURT’S UN-SIRO SIRE FOR THEM TO NOT GET NAKED, GIVEN ALL THE LAC, STRAPS, STREAMERS, BOWS, HOOKS, CLAMPS, AND ELASTIC FASTENERS THIS WOULD REQUIRE UNDOG OM SWEET PORCELA’S LAYERS OF “FASHN.” I EVEN GET HOW KURT IS JEALO OF ALL THE SOLICO ATTENTN THAT THE PROMISCUO NEWBIE TWK,SEBASTIAN, IS PAYG TO HIS BOBBLE-HEAD BOYIEND. WHAT I DON’T GET IS HOW BLAE, AFTER LIVG FOR YEARS AT WHAT IS PROBABLY THE LARGT CHICKEN FARM THIS SI OF SPRGDALE, ARKANSAS, ULD POSSIBLY HAVE BEEN A VIRG BEFORE THIS. IF WE’RE TO BELIEVE THE CLOSG MONTAGE, BY THE END OF THE EPISO HE ISN’T ANYMORE—THAT IS, IF LOSG ONE’S GAY VIRGY NSISTS SOLELY OF LYG UNR QUILTS AND WRAPPG ONE’S ARMS TENRLY AROUND ANOTHER MAN’S BARE BACK WHILE SHOW TUN PLAY THE BACKGROUND. AS THEY SAY CHECKERS, “QUEEN ME.”BITE/COOTER: I THK DOT MARIE JON IS AN UNTILIZED TREASURE. SO I THK SUCKS THAT EVERY TIME SHE’S AT THE CENTER OF A PLOTLE—LIKE THIS EPISO—SHE’S RELEGATED TO WRIGGLG ABOUT SI THE ONLY SAD SACK THE WRERS SEEM PABLE OF KNTG FOR HER: THE HUNT FOR A MAN. THEREFORE, I DON’T WANT TO SAY TOO MUCH ABOUT THIS WEEK’S B VOLVG HER CHASTE LOVE FOR THE RECTANGULAR OH STATE BUCKEY FOOTBALL TALENT SUT WHO APPEARS AT MCKLEY TO REC SHANE (AND NOT REC FN), EXCEPT THAT IF THE WRERS ARE SO HELL-BENT ON NVCG THAT THE BITE IS STRAIGHT, WHY DID THEY GIVE HER SUOR THE NAME COOTER?__FOR PLAY:__WHY, THE NAME OF THE HOLY TRY (BERNSTE, SONDHEIM, AND LRENTIS) WERE THE PLAY’S OPENG-NIGHT PERFORMANC NOT SHOWN AS A PLAY— A LEAR FASHN, THE DORIUM, WH AN DIENCE—BUT RATHER ALL TERSPERSED WH THIS WEEK’S ANE SEXUAL GOGS-ON? IT WAS ALMOST AS IF THE SHOW’S CREATORS HAD FILMED A WHOLE SEPARATE EPISO ABOUT THE KIDS PUTTG ON *WT SI STORY,*AND SCRAPPED , BUT THEN RETURNED TO THE EDG ROOM AND CHECKER-BOARD ALL . IT WAS JARRG AND CHEAP, AND DID A DISSERVICEBOTH TO THE SHOW’S PATIENCE SETTG UP THE MIL—STEAD OF JT STG, REHEARSG, AND PERFORMG ONE EPISO—AND TO THE PERFORMANC THEMSELV, ALL OF WHICH TOOK ON THE VERY UNFORTUNATE FEEL OF A MASH-UP.MOST POPULARKYLE DCHANEL, THE ROTHSCHILD WHO WASN’TBY NATE FREEMANADAM SANDLER FDS LOW-KEY TRIUMPH YOU ARE SO NOT INVED TO MY BAT MZVAHBY SAVANNAH WALSHNETFLIX’S MURDGH MURRS IS OFFICIALLY RETURNG FOR SEASON 2: EXCLIVEBY SAVANNAH WALSH__BEAR-LY LEGAL:__I WAS SO HAPPY TO SEE DAVE KAROFSKY APPEAR THIS EPISO, NOT ONLY BEE I ADORE THE MENSCH-Y MAX ADLER, BUT BEE I LIKE THE IA OF HIS GARNERG SOME REMPTN, AND HIS NVERSATN WH KURT AT SNDALS OFFERED JT THIS. BEG A CLOSETED HIGH SCHOOLER IS NOTHG TO BE ASHAMED OF, SO LONG AS YOU’RE NOT JURG ANYONE ELSE. ADOLCENCE IS HARD ENOUGH. SO I THOUGHT HIS REVEAL ABOUT HIS MOTIVATNS FOR LEAVG MCKLEY—HE WANTED TO BE SOMEWHERE WHERE HE WASN’T KNOWN, AND ULD JT PLAY FOOTBALL AND BE A KID—WAS HANDLED SENSIVELY. ALSO GREAT: HIS PICTN OF HIS POPULARY AT SNDALS. IT’S NOT EVERY DAY THAT A YOUNG, GAY SHTARKER LIKE DAVE GETS TO EXPLITE THE TRICI OF THE BEAR SUBCULTURE TO EVERY TWEEN AND HOEWIFE MIDDLE AMERI.SONG RATGS (* TO *****)“TONIGHT” (WT SI STORY)* FEEL THE FIZZLE.“UPTOWN GIRL” (BILLY JOEL)** UPTOWN GURRL, MAYBE. SEND STAR FOR SHEER DACY.“A BOY LIKE THAT” (WT SI STORY)* THE ACCENTS THIS RENDN KILLED CHA RIVERA. HAPPY, GLEE?“AMERI” (WT SI STORY)* WA, I THOUGHT I LIKED THE SONGS OM THIS SHOW?“ONE HAND, ONE HEART” (WT SI STORY) * THANKS FOR MAKG UNBEARABLY EXPLIC THE ONE HAND-JOB, ONE HARD-ON JOKE.GAYT MOMENTSNDALS!CATCHG UP ON THE SEASON'S REAPS? READ ;SGLEE ARCHIVE HERE.BRETT BERK
Fn of urse, is reluctant to pair wh a boy, for fear of beg pegged as gay.
Rachel then nonts Kurt, who adms that they are both love wh the same man and that as long as Qun is the picture, neher of them will ever have him—Kurt ls so bee Fn is not gay.