What Do It Mean to Be a Gay Man? | Psychology Today

Contents:

• PHYSIL, BEHAVRAL, AND PSYCHOLOGIL TRAS OF GAY MEN INTIFYG AS BEARS
• WHAT DO IT MEAN TO BE A GAY MAN?
• IS YOUR CHILD GAY?
• THE 'GAY GENE' IS A MYTH BUT BEG GAY IS 'NATURAL,' SAY SCIENTISTS

PHYSIL, BEHAVRAL, AND PSYCHOLOGIL TRAS OF GAY MEN INTIFYG AS BEARS

Keywords: Bears, Gay Culture, Gay and Bisexual Men, Self-teem, Masculy, ObyINTRODUCTIONThe gay muny is ultimately a heterogeneo one wh many subgroups and subcultur—one of the monali among them beg the sire to have same-sex enunters.

WHAT DO IT MEAN TO BE A GAY MAN?

Bee there is a arth of general rearch regardg this muny, and no studi to date that e quantative methods, we cid to explore this muny quantatively—g an Inter-nvenience sample, followed by a purposive suggted, the Bear culture exhibs and valu a greater sense of domant (but not necsarily domeerg) “thentic masculy” parison to other subcultur wh the gay muny (e. In rponse and ntrast wh Leathermen, Bears mata their mascule inty whout adoptg negative hypermascule tennci to acmodate all partners, spe their size or body is some theoretil support for why the Bear inty spltered om the gay male mastream culture.

Popular culture, the media, and Wtern hetero- and homosexual expectatns have normalized the ial male body as one that is lean, mcular, and v-shaped (wh broad shoulrs, a narrow waist, and a flat but well-fed stomach) (Olivardia, Pope, Borowiecki, & Cohane, 2000). G., poor self-image/self-teem) velop both heterosexual and homosexual men exhibg ls sirable physil tras (Beren, Hayn, Wilfley, & Grilo, 1996; Morrison, Morrison, & Sager, 2004; Pepl et al., 2009; Weer, 2009; Yelland & Tiggemann, 2003).

IS YOUR CHILD GAY?

Whereas mastream gay men often do not engage sired or preferred sexual behavrs bee of fears of rejectn or judgment (Kamski, Chapman, Hayn, & Own, 2004), those the more acceptg Bear muny reject the fears due to their beg ultimately “feme” nature (Hennen, 2005).

G., uratn, fistg, voyrism, exhibnism) (Grov, Parsons, & Bimbi, 2010) to the active existence of the Bear muny and regnn of this subculture by the larger gay/bisexual male culture, more rearch is need to explore the gree to which the prevly mentned physil, behavral, and psychologil differenc actually exist. Consirg the likely prevalence of a Bear inty may be held (wh varyg tenaci) by about 14–22% of gay men, the rults provi addnal evince for the manift and latent heterogeney of gay and bisexual rults regardg body tras and partner selectn nfirm, for the first time a systematic manner, fdgs documented prev terview and ethnographic studi.

To be able to take a fist or urate on another man may be how the men exemplify their form of masculy—particularly a sexual climate where most gay men do not want to, nnot, or will not enact the behavrs. Regardls of the potential explanatn, Bears appear to be more sexually diverse and explorative than mastream gay and bisexual rults documented lower self-teem, which ntradicted both our hypothis and others’ terview rearch (e. In this rpect, Bears may overtimate and overstate re towards partners to self-prent as beg distct om men adherg to the mastream gay culture (which are often stereotyped as treatg partners as disposable) (Isay, 2009).

THE 'GAY GENE' IS A MYTH BUT BEG GAY IS 'NATURAL,' SAY SCIENTISTS

A portra emerg om the Bear rults that supports a theory for why the gay muny ultimately is so heterogeneo (and th produc the high gree of spoff subcultur): Cultur facilate succsful same-sex enunters. Whether the ems are applible to gay men, bisexuals, or men qutng their sexualy remas rpect to methods, the parabily of sampl may be somewhat uncerta, as one was llected through ter surveyg and the other, through paper survey.

A study that answers the rearch qutns would provi further evince to support the heterogeney hypothis: Not only is the mastream gay muny culturally heterogeneo, but so are the sexual health behavrs and problems wh last suggtn for future rearch would be to tt some of the theori generated by the current data. As every gay man knows who has been sulted or asslted for his actual or perceived sexual orientatn, there are steep penalti for vlatg the Boy Co as there are for anyone who is “different” om the prumed (typilly whe, heterosexual, middle-class) standard. How do a gay kid survive the trma he suffers for beg different a culture that still nmns his difference as somethg bad or “ls-than” and wants to mold him to the same shape tri to mold every boy?

Robert Pollack says the most important thg a fay n do to support their gay son is to keep lovg him, “to nvey to him, as soon as he shar his feelgs, that he is still loved through and through, that his sexual orientatn will not any way dimish how much he is admired and rpected. Fortunately there is a long history of gay men who bucked the accepted fns of masculy and created liv that exprsed their unrstandg of themselv and how they choose to exprs their inty as men who don’t necsarily f tradnal molds.