How to Pick Up Gay Men: Buildg Confince & Makg a Move

Contents:

• THE DOS & DON'TS OF GAY CLUBBG
• HOW TO BEE POPULAR AT A GAY BAR
• DO YOU WANNA FUNK WH ME?: A BEGNER’S GUI TO GAY NIGHTCLUBS
• GAY BARS AND GAY RIGHTS
• STEP-BY-STEP INSTCTNS FOR SHOOTG YOUR SHOT WH GAY GUYS
• GAY BARS NEAR ME
• A MEMOIR ABOUT QUEER INTY, TOLD ONE GAY BAR AT A TIME
• LIQUOR LAWS ONCE TARGETED GAY BARS. NOW, ONE STATE IS APOLOGIZG.
• GAY NEW YORK CY
• IN ‘GAY BAR,’ TIME-HOPPG SNAPSHOTS OF QUEER NIGHTLIFE
• IS IT LAST CALL FOR THE GAY BAR?
• GAY MOSW · CY GUI
• MOSW GAY BARS

THE DOS & DON'TS OF GAY CLUBBG

Chanc are, your first tentative steps out onto the London queer scene were ma or around Old Compton Street, the shg of London’s mastream gay culture. Csg a venue to ll out an expensive plummer bee you and your pals thought ’d be a great plan to smash up the toilet after your first h of gay gra gak isn’t exactly the pnacle of allyship. A mere 30 years later, sectn 28 was passed - makg an offence to promote (talk about) homosexualy schools and only 5 years ago same sex marriag were not legal.

To be fair, there are straight clubs that play great mic and have fun, nonjudgmental crowds, and there are gay bars that are nothg more than S and M (Stand and Mol) clubs. Certa gay/lbian clubs have their target clientele, of urse — wboys and wgirls (The Round-up Saloon Dallas), leather men (La Track Montreal), punk lbians (The Dyke Bar Brighton, UK), and drag queens (1001 Pub Maryl Istanbul), for stance — but what I’m talkg about is your basic glter-ball, all-wele, humpg-on-the-dance-floor dis.

This wouldn’t have happened at any of the gay bars town, and we fely would have had a better time, as the doorman was jt the first of numero snooty employe we enuntered, there. A gay bar is one of the few plac where homosexuals n exprs their affectn for one another whout beg subjected to someone’s narrow judgment, or, prumably, riskg harm to themselv, so expect to happen.

HOW TO BEE POPULAR AT A GAY BAR

I went wh three iends — a lbian and a straight uple — to a gay nightclub a while back, but was separated om them immediately after enterg the crowd club.

DO YOU WANNA FUNK WH ME?: A BEGNER’S GUI TO GAY NIGHTCLUBS

Dg e, particularly the e of ecstasy and other signer dgs, is higher among the gay populatn than the straight populatn, and some gays and lbians equate a night on the town wh a night of high-energy, dg-duced spastic dancg.

GAY BARS AND GAY RIGHTS

In my qut for the perfect dance club, I tried, or was dragged to, diss of all varieti, so I know om experience that the bt dance mic is a gay bar.

Sylvter, the late dis diva of the ’80s, was one of the first to target gay dienc, and he tablished a proud tradn of producg multi-layered tracks to which even the most rhythmilly-challenged uld dance. Even though he was straight and had a girliend, Ron and I went dancg together often; we both loved to dance, and if no one wanted to go out wh , we knew we uld dance a gay bar whout beg hassled.

From gym gods to nerds to fag hags (the latter beg the straight women who hang wh their gay male iends) to straight upl who want to try some place new — don’t matter.

STEP-BY-STEP INSTCTNS FOR SHOOTG YOUR SHOT WH GAY GUYS

Although, to be hont, the more you look like a er ught the headlights, the more the regulars will look at you oddly, so try not to eak out when you see your first drag queen or gay/lbian uple makg out.

GAY BARS NEAR ME

When I attend llege the homophobic town of Wa, Texas, gettg to the one gay bar town remd me of enterg a speak-easy durg Prohibn, but once si, the patrons were all nice and easy-gog. However, if you have no problem wh gay, lbian, bisexual or transgenred people general, they turn will have no problem wh you, so you ought to give the lol gay bar a try. Like everythg I wre, the tent of this piece is to break down the stigmas surroundg the sex liv of gay who are sensive to ank discsns about sex are ved to click elsewhere, but nsir this: If you are outraged by ntent that addrs sex openly and hontly, I ve you to exame this outrage and ask yourself whether should stead be directed at those who opprs by policg our all others, enjoy the slishow.

A MEMOIR ABOUT QUEER INTY, TOLD ONE GAY BAR AT A TIME

Even if you're the LGBTQ+ muny and you walk to an implicly queer-domant space, as most leather bars are, and are not to the sex liftyl leather bars celebrate, you're the equivalent of a bachelorette at any gay bar Ameri -- an unwele nuisance potentially g the space for people who re about more than you do. You're more likely to see public sex happeng at a leather bar than, say, your classic tsel palace gay bar wh boyish go-go dancers and Top 40 hs blarg over a by dance floor.

The only circumstance where this le gets challenged is a lights-out space ma for anonymo play -- spac which exist some leather bars, gay sex clubs, gay bathho, and so on. The hanky has vague roots, but we know started the 70s (or earlier) as a vert way for gay men to munite what kd of sex they were lookg for the pre-ter, pre-Grdr, pre-mobile phone, pre-revolutn days. Even the classic, non-leathery gay bar -- the drag queen palace, the queer dive, the limp-wristed cktail lounge, gossip central -- is rapidly beg a artifact of years past, pre-Grdr nostalgia: a throwback to that simpler time before we found sex partners wh a simple click.

The bartenr (or someone there) will be able to tell you where to go, what plac sell gear, what parti are happeng, where the guys cise, where the gayborhood is, and so on. If you ci your neart one is not for you, go to a gay leather bar New York Cy (Eagle NYC, The Cock), San Francis (Powerhoe, Eagle SF, 440 Castro), Los Angel (Eagle LA, Fltle), London (Eagle London, The Backstreet), Berl (SO MANY).

LIQUOR LAWS ONCE TARGETED GAY BARS. NOW, ONE STATE IS APOLOGIZG.

Gay bars, one of the few public plac of ngregatn for LGBTQ+ people before the Stonewall rebelln of 1969, were flash pots for the crimalizatn of same-sex sexual nduct, acrdg to legal scholar Patricia A. Addnally, a broad terpretatn of “homosexual acts” the twentieth century ma “lbians and gay men thk of themselv as crimals jt for beg who they were, ” wr Ca.

GAY NEW YORK CY

Department of Alhol Beverage Control required “somethg more” than the mere prence of homosexuals a California bar for thori to revoke a liquor license. In 1967, Miami prohibed issug liquor licens to tablishments that employed homosexuals, sold liquor to homosexuals, or allowed two or more homosexuals to ngregate on the premis. The bars are safe spac where members of the lbian, gay, bisexual, transgenr and tersex (LGBTI) muny n e together and celebrate their inti whout fear of discrimatn or judgement.

However, ’s important to remember that Istanbul is pal of an Islamic untry; for all s liberal aspects, Turkey is chg s way closer to Middle Eastern valu daily, and this is havg a knock-on effect on LGBT rights Istanbul that gay travelers to the area should take to nsiratn.

IN ‘GAY BAR,’ TIME-HOPPG SNAPSHOTS OF QUEER NIGHTLIFE

Homosexualy is not illegal Turkey: between adults, same-sex sexual activy was ma legal the Ottoman Empire 1858, and sce morn Turkey’s foundatn 1923 has always been legal.

IS IT LAST CALL FOR THE GAY BAR?

However, there are some rather ambiguo bans the crimal on “offens agast public moraly” which n be terpreted agast LGBT people and homosexuals are banned om ary service. Currently, there are no anti-discrimatn laws Turkey that protect LGBT people om discrimatn the public sphere or employment, although opposn parti have tried to troduce bills providg legal protectn for gay and transgenr people. A report published by Human Rights Watch 2008 outled the daily threat of vlence and discrimatn faced by gay and transgenr people, wh sufficient reactn om police and the thori.

GAY MOSW · CY GUI

The social suatn for members of the gay muny is better smopolan Istanbul than ral areas but whether or not people feel fortable g out to their fay and iends is extremely ntext-pennt and still pos a number of risks.

Istanbul has a fairly thrivg gay scene, wh pulsg dance floors, gay bars, and hamams; but many lols who participate are livg a double life, beg unable to be open wh their fai or at work for fear of the negative impact uld have on their future. The shift towards nservatism Turkey as a whole do not bo well, but Istanbul’s long-tablished liberal character uld hold firm agast a risg ti of anti-gay feelg and hopefully ph that ti back.

Generally speakg LGBT rights Istanbul are fairly well-tablished and is a very gay-iendly cy, although most of the gay life happens doors or at night.

MOSW GAY BARS

Asi om the wealth of historic and cultural sights, there is a relatively thrivg gay scene Istanbul wh plenty of bars, clubs, f, and rtrants to choose om. There is also a range of hamams, but as a tradnal Turkish experience they are equented by everyone, so travelers should not assume they are specifilly gay foced. In fact, the current climate, snas and hamams will actively avoid beg labeled as ‘gay-iendly, ’ so is better jt to enjoy the as cultural experienc unls you are wh someone the know.