Can Gay and Straight Men Really Be Friends? | Psychology Today

gay friendship

There are lots of reasons why you might want to know if your iend is gay. There are some important thgs that you have to unrstand about this suatn before gog forward, however. Someone's sexualy is highly plex and highly...

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GAY MEN AND STRAIGHT MEN AS FRIENDS

Could gay guys be the ultimate wg men for their straight, male iends? * gay friendship *

Homophobia was likely one reason; another was that straight men probably assumed they didn’t have much mon wh gay men. Specifilly, we’re terted lookg at the reasons gay men and straight men bee iends (or rema iends after the gay iend out).

We currently have a survey vtigatn unrway that explor some of the posive out of “bromosexual” iendships, cludg our theory that gay men and straight men n be optimal wg men for one another.

HOW TO MAKE GAY FRIENDS: AN LBGT FRIENDSHIP GUI

Heterosexual and gay men n heal and grow as a rult of their iendships. * gay friendship *

Gay men – particularly those nservative and ral environments – rema wary about tryg to beiend straight men, fearg prejudice-fueled rejectn. At the same time, many straight men still doubt that they’ll be able to relate to gay men any meangful way and, for this reason, may not try to iate a iendship.

If they’re open-md about beiendg gay men and make the effort to try to fe iendships based upon mon terts, gay men should feel more fortable reciprotg.

HOW TO TELL IF YOUR GUY FRIEND IS GAY

* gay friendship *

Gay men who disclose their sexual orientatn to their straight male iends earlier life may be able to build more open and hont iendships wh them to adulthood. Send, recent rearch has argued that genr and sexual orientatn might not be as black and whe as prevly thought, which opens up new avenu for explorg how gay and straight men n relate to one another.

MEETG YOUR FIRST GAY FRIEND

The issu that once kept straight men and gay men apart are dissolvg, real life and popular culture. * gay friendship *

If a straight guy and his gay male iend are ls rigid about their masculy and sexualy, they’ll probably be more likely to discs tails about their sexual and romantic liv openly wh one another.

In short, women are able to tst the datg advice om gay male iends bee they know their gay iends don’t have any ulterr motiv: They’re not tryg to hook up wh them or pete wh them for guys. Bee of the tst they engenr om straight women, gay men are uniquely posned to be excellent “wg men” for sgle straight men.

However, straight women do tend to tst the datg advice of gay men (pecially more than advice om straight men or women).

WHAT THE WORLD CAN LEARN FROM GAY-STRAIGHT FRIENDSHIPS

Every time you attend a Pri March, ftival or cent Gay Club Night, you may have noticed jt how many fellow queers live your cy. The qutn is how to fd them outsi of the special events? Follow the steps to extend your... * gay friendship *

Jt as a gay man might be able to pass on advice about women to his straight iend, a straight man uld nnect his gay male iend wh another sirable gay man, sce neher the gay man nor his straight iend are petg for the same person. We believe that havg a tstworthy nfidant to help wh romantic pursus is one of the major reasons straight and gay men are leavg the fort of their same-sex, same-orientatn iend groups to form “bromosexual” iendships. Sex the Cy, Will and Grace), though a lot ls has been said about how gay and straight men regnize and negotiate the distct challeng, plitns, and rewards of their iendships.

S., before there was such a thg as a gay inty, some straight men would, wh ltle shame, engage sexual ntact wh other men (ually allowg themselv to be fellated) when female partners were otherwise unavailable (see Gee Chncey’s semal book, Gay New York: Genr, Urban Culture, and the Makg of the Gay Male World 1890-1940) and there is good reason to believe this still occurs other untri and cultur. As a rult of this behavr-inty lk, sexual ngrs between gay and straight men creased nsirably, or at least went unrground.

Gay men have suffered physil, social, and psychologil abe at the hands of heterosexually intified mal who, thanks to homophobia and heterosexism, felt fully jtified flictg the terrors.

HOW TO MAKE GAY FRIENDS

If the h 90s TV show, "Will and Grace" was one of your favor, you may be yearng for that perfect gay bt iend (GBF). The iend who, asi om beg totally hot, knows you like the back of their hand, offerg sage sightful... * gay friendship *

This legacy of vlence, both physil and psychologil, flicted by straight men toward those of who are gay naturally fuels our utn and distst at the thought of beiendg them. For the straight guy, iendship wh a gay man offers the opportuny to learn important lsons about masculy, male inty, sexual orientatn, and diversy. As the quote go: You n never have too many iends—and iendships between gay and straight guys n be healg and uniquely satisfyg for all volved.

HOW TO FD YOUR GAY BT FRIEND

Consir the turng pot of gay relatnships, platonic or otherwise. * gay friendship *

Outsi of LGBTQ+-specific meetups, a great way to fd LGBT iendships is actually by attendg meetups that gay people typilly like. For example, his fay may be vlently homophobic and by cidg that he's gay, you may out him by accint by treatg him different or implyg somethg whout meang to.

WHAT HAPPENS TO GAY FRIENDSHIPS WHEN YOU GO MONOGAMO?

New rearch explor the benefs of iendship between gay and straight men. * gay friendship *

If you're tryg to figure out if your iend is gay bee you want to date him (as a woman), 's important to remember that jt bee he might be terted men don't mean he's not terted women. One of the theori about why some people are gay has to do wh the hormon that they're exposed to before they're born. Although some people the gay culture may put on a certa voice or a way of speakg, your iend talkg a siar or "effemate" way is still not a very good way to judge.

Everyone n enjoy different thgs; jt like a woman might enjoy watchg football, guys n also enjoy thgs that are more monly associated wh women or the gay muny.

CAN GAY AND STRAIGHT MEN REALLY BE FRIENDS?

The movi he watch and the mic he listens to are also not fair methods to gge if he is straight or gayer than Elton John and Gee Takei put together. Sometim you might assume that jt bee a guy only hangs out wh girls or jt bee his bt iend also seems gay, then he might also be gay. Subtly brg up subjects that show him that you're okay wh your iends beg gay and that he don't need to hi his nature around you.

You n talk about another iend that is gay or even jt about someone hypothetilly g out if you don't know someone who's gay.

WHY STRAIGHT WOMEN AND GAY MEN MAKE THE BT OF FRIENDS

Say somethg like, "You know you're stuck wh me as a iend no matter what, but I jt have to ask bee I don't want to make assumptns and e to the wrong nclns: are you gay?

Article SummaryXTo tell if your guy iend is gay, notice whether he refers to other guys as attractive, which uld be a sign that he’s gay.

Pay attentn to how much he talks about women a romantic or sexual way, sce a lack of tert women uld suggt he’s gay.

HOW SHOULD CHRISTIANS RELATE TO GAY FRIENDS, NEIGHBORS, AND FAY?

I’ll never fet beg 15 years old and walkg to my first ever meetg for lbian, gay, bi, queer, and trans youth at BAGLY Boston. ”) The close queer iends we make bee a chosen fay, wh a shared culture and inty, formg the bonds that are sential to our wellns and as gay bars and bookstor are closg left and right, many of have turned to apps to fill that gap, meang we spend more time than ever alone our rooms. LGBT2Q people exist all genrs, all cultur, and relyg on your gaydar is a good start, but expandg your queer and trans cultural referenc will boost your abili.

HOW TO HAVE A GAY FRIEND

Instagram and Twter make easier to fd other people wh the same terts, whether ’s hedgehogs or aerosol art, and there are so many homo-tastic hashtags. Or, add your inty to your state, school, or profsn to fd #GayMichigan or #QueerMorehoe or #TransUtah or #PansexualUK and more.

*BEAR-MAGAZINE.COM* GAY FRIENDSHIP

Meetg Your First Gay Friend | GQ .

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