NFL’s Kev Maxen Com Out as Gay, Mak History as First Out Male Coach Men’s Profsnal Sports Kev Maxen, an associate strength ach for the NFL's Jacksonville Jaguars, is g out as gay and makg history. In dog so, he is the first publicly…
Contents:
- A GAY UPLE RAN A RAL RTRANT PEACE. THEN NEW NEIGHBORS ARRIVED.
- NFL'S KEV MAXEN COM OUT AS GAY, MAK HISTORY AS FIRST OUT MALE COACH MEN'S PROFSNAL SPORTS
- FOR THE "TOTAL TOPS," MASCULY IS A PRISONWHAT'S PREVENTG SOME GAY MEN OM OPENG THEIR MDS (AND BODI) TO BOTTOMG?{FONT:NORMAL 800 1.2REM/1.2 "D BOLD",SANS-SERIF;TEXT-TRANSFORM:NORMAL;LOR:HER;DISPLAY:LE-BLOCK;PADDG-BOTTOM:6PX;POSN:RELATIVE;TEXT-TRANSFORM:UPPERSE;}{BACKGROUND:#89308A;BOTTOM:0;NTENT:'';DISPLAY:BLOCK;HEIGHT:2PX;LEFT:0;POSN:ABSOLUTE;RIGHT:0;-WEBK-TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;WIDTH:100%;}{LEFT:51%;RIGHT:51%;WIDTH:0;}{FONT:NORMAL 800 1.2REM/1.2 "D BOLD",SANS-SERIF;TEXT-TRANSFORM:NORMAL;LOR:HER;DISPLAY:LE-BLOCK;PADDG-BOTTOM:6PX;POSN:RELATIVE;TEXT-TRANSFORM:UPPERSE;}{BACKGROUND:#89308A;BOTTOM:0;NTENT:'';DISPLAY:BLOCK;HEIGHT:2PX;LEFT:0;POSN:ABSOLUTE;RIGHT:0;-WEBK-TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;WIDTH:100%;}{LEFT:51%;RIGHT:51%;WIDTH:0;}LIFEBY BOBBY BOXFEBARY 12, 2020/12:10 {HEIGHT:HER;DISPLAY:-WEBK-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-FLEX;DISPLAY:-MS-FLEXBOX;DISPLAY:FLEX;POSN:RELATIVE;-WEBK-FLEX-WRAP:WRAP;-MS-FLEX-WRAP:WRAP;FLEX-WRAP:WRAP;-WEBK-ALIGN-EMS:CENTER;-WEBK-BOX-ALIGN:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-ALIGN:CENTER;ALIGN-EMS:CENTER;-WEBK-BOX-PACK:CENTER;-WEBK-JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-PACK:CENTER;JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-WEBK-TRANSFORM-ORIG:CENTER;-MS-TRANSFORM-ORIG:CENTER;TRANSFORM-ORIG:CENTER;} IMG{HEIGHT:100%;WIDTH:100%;OBJECT-F:VER;}{HEIGHT:2048PX;WIDTH:3072PX;}GETTYBY BOBBY BOXFEBARY 12, 2020 / 12:10 PM{"@NTEXT":","@TYPE":"NEWSARTICLE","HEADLE":"FOR THE \"TOTAL TOPS,\" MASCULY IS A PRISON","THUMBNAILURL":","DATEPUBLISHED":"2020-02-12T17:10:33.000+0000","DATEMODIFIED":"2020-02-12T17:10:33.000+0000","IMAGE":{"@NTEXT":","@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT","URL":","WIDTH":1920,"HEIGHT":1080},"URL":","THOR":{"@TYPE":"ORGANIZATN","NAME":"LOGO TV"},"MAENTYOFPAGE":{"@TYPE":"WEBPAGE","@ID":"},"PUBLISHER":{"@TYPE":"ORGANIZATN","@ID":","NAME":"LOGO TV","URL":","LOGO":{"@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT"}},"CREATOR":"BOBBY BOX","KEYWORDS":"LOVE AND SEX","ARTICLESECTN":"LIFE"}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}THE FIRST MAN I EVER DATED INTIFIED AS A "TOTAL TOP." HE WAS 20 YEARS MY SENR, HAD A REPUTATN FOR FUCKG GUYS GYM SHOWERS, AND, FTGLY, BROKE UP WH ME BEE I WAS KEEPG HIM OM THE {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}FRH OUT OF THE CLOSET, I WAS EAGER AND TERRIFIED TO EXPLORE ALL ASPECTS OF MY NEWLY REALIZED SEXUALY WH HIM. HOWEVER, DUE TO VAR FACTORS, WE NEVER HAD PERATIVE SEX, WHICH ULTIMATELY LED HIM TO STRAY. IN ADDN, HE EXPLIBLY NEVER WANTED TO EQUENT QUEER SPAC, SISTG THE MUNY WAS TOXIC WHILE ASSURG ME I “WASN’T MISSG ANYTHG.” HE WAS A MAN OF MYSTERY AND THAT IS WHAT IALLY DREW ME TO {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}BUT THERE WAS ONE THG ABOUT HIM THAT I KNEW FOR {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}I DUCED THAT HIS ABSOLUTE REFAL TO BOTTOM—PAIRED WH ALWAYS PAYG, DRIVG, AND DOG HANDY-WORK AROUND MY HOE (SPE EXPRSG THAT I’D LIKE TO DO THE THGS, TOO)—WAS A PLEX OF SORTS. FOR HIM, BEG A TOTAL TOP NTRIBUTED EPLY TO HIS CHARACTER. LIKE THE MCL, THE GFF VOICE, THE BODY HAIR, AND ALL THE OTHER TRIMMGS OF A TRADNALLY MASCULE PERSONA, BEG A TOTAL TOP MA HIM FEEL “MANLY.”GETTYCOUPLE OF HANDSOME GAY MEN, THEIR UNRWEAR, BED TOGETHER TOGETHER WH ONE OF THEM LOOKG AT THE {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}OF URSE, I KNOW THERE ARE OTHER PRACTIL AND PREFERENTIAL REASONS AS TO WHY SOME QUEER MEN TOP THAT DON’T HAVE TO DO WH PERFORMATIVE MASCULY. BUT I WANT TO KNOW IF MASCULY’S FLUENCE IS SO STRONG THAT PREVENTS TOTAL TOPS OM OPENG THEIR MDS (AND BODI) TO DIFFERENT SEXUAL {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}THE SHORT ANSWER IS Y. ACRDG TO KYLE SHUPE, A DOCTORAL STUNT SOCLOGY AT THE UNIVERSY OF CCNATI, WHO REARCH QUEER MEN’S SEXUAL PRACTIC, INTI, AND MUNI, TOTAL TOPS ARE CHARACTERIZED MORE BY THEIR SENSE OF MASCULY THAN THEIR ACTUAL SEXUAL {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}“OFTENTIM, TOPPG IS ED BY THE MEN TO ASSERT THEIR MASCULY RELATN TO ANOTHER— THEIR MDS—MORE EFFEMATE GAY MEN AND ANYONE WHO BOTTOMS,” HE TELLS ME, EXPLAG MEN WHO CLAIM THEY’RE TOTAL TOPS ARE REALLY SAYG: “I’M GAY, AND ALSO MASCULE,” OR THE EVER-POPULAR, “I’M NOT LIKE THOSE OTHER GAYS.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}SAY WHAT YOU WILL, BUT THIS PERCEPTN IS NOT ALWAYS MISPLACED. SOME REARCH NFIRMS TOPS ARE NSIRED "MORE MASCULE" AND, AS SUCH, NOT BOTTOMG HELPS THEM MATA MASCULY THEIR GAY INTY. “THE ASSOCIATN OF TOPPG WH MASCULY AND BOTTOMG WH FEMY IS GRAED MUCH OF GAY MEN’S CULTURE,” SHUPE SAYS, FOR WHICH HE C TWO {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}FIRST, BEE WE DRAW ON HETERONORMATIVE SEXUAL SCRIPTS WHEN AMG GAY SEX; WE’RE TGHT THAT STRAIGHT SEX IS CHARACTERIZED BY A DOMANT, MASCULE MALE WHO PERAT A SUBMISSIVE, FEME FEMALE. “GAY MEN E A SIAR AMEWORK WH TOPS AND BOTTOMS, WHERE THE BOTTOM IS ASSUMG THE WOMAN’S ROLE AS THE RECEPTIVE PARTNER,” SHUPE {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}SHUPE’S SEND TIMATN IS THAT, BEE REARCH HAS SHOWN THAT MASCULE MEN ARE SOCIALLY, POLILLY, ENOMILLY, AND CULTURALLY ADVANTAGED NORTH AMERI (THE GENR PAY GAP, REPRENTATN CONGRS, AND PICTNS FILM ARE A FEW EXAMPL), THEY RECEIVE GREATER SOCIAL BENEFS PARED TO MEN WHO DISPLAY TRAS ASSOCIATED WH FEMY.GETTYBEHD {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}CONNELL ARGU THAT, PATRIARCHAL SOCIETI, GAY MEN ARE SEEN AS LACKG MASCULY PARED TO STRAIGHT MEN, SO—LIKE WOMEN AND NONBARY FOLKS—GAY MEN HAVE FEWER OPPORTUNI AND ADVANTAG {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}“HOWEVER, THIS ISN'T TOTALIZG AS GAY MEN N PERFORM MASCULY TO ACCS SOME OF THE BENEFS, WHICH IS WHAT TOTAL TOPS ARE TAPPG TO,” SHUPE SAYS. REARCH SHOWS GAY MEN, PARTICULAR, PERFORM MASCULY FOR A NUMBER OF REASONS, CLUDG APPEARG MORE ATTRACTIVE TO OTHER MEN AND MATAG FAY {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}“IN THE U.S., GAY MEN ARE CULTURALLY STEREOTYPED AS EFFEMATE, SO WE’RE SOCIALLY VALUED PARED TO STRAIGHT MEN,” SHUPE EXPLAS. “THEREFORE, GAY MEN WHO SIRE THE SOCIAL BENEFS MAY POSN THEMSELV AS MORE MASCULE THAN OTHER GAY MEN.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}TO MY SURPRISE, SPEAKG WH MANY SELF-PROFSED TOTAL TOPS, NONE SEEMED TOO NCERNED WH BEG PERCEIVED AS MASCULE. HOWEVER, ANDREW, 25, DON’T NY S FLUENCE EHER. “I THK THAT THE PROJECTN OF MASCULY IS SO EPLY ROOTED —EVEN THROUGHOUT OUR YOUTH—THAT WE DON’T KNOW HOW EPLY GRAED IS .”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}ANDREW HAS BOTTOMED THE PAST, BUT ONLY WH THOSE HE WAS A MTED RELATNSHIP WH (A MON EXCEPTN AMONG TOTAL TOPS). “FOR ME, TAK A LOT OF TIME AND PATIENCE TO BE ABLE TO BOTTOM—AND I'M NOT A PATIENT PERSON.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}DYLAN, 27, HASN’T BOTTOMED OVER FIVE YEARS BEE BEG SUBMISSIVE DON’T E NATURAL TO HIM. WHILE HE DON’T GENERALLY REGARD BOTTOMS AS FEME, HE SAYS SOMETHG OUR NVERSATN THAT SUGGTS OTHERWISE: “MOST TOPS TEND TO BE FAIRLY MASCULE-ACTG.” HE WENT ON TO EXPLA HOW BOTTOMS TEND TO ENPASS A MORE DIVERSE SAMPLE OF GAY MEN, WHEREAS MOST STRICT TOPS ARE “FAIRLY TYPIL,” WHICH HE FAILED TO EXPLA {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}FOR SOME, THE MASCULE NNOTATN HAS S DISADVANTAG. “I THK BOTTOMS REGARD TOPS THE SAME WAY STRAIGHT MEN REGARD WOMEN: WE’RE A NQUT, A SEXUAL PRIZE, BUT NOT REALLY ANYTHG ELSE—JT DICK,” MEECHAM, 32, SAYS. AS A BLACK MAN AND TOTAL TOP, HE WNS THIS FETISHIZATN TENFOLD. “IT'S EXCG AT FIRST, BUT WHEN HAPPENS A THOAND TIM, 'S NOT A GREAT FEELG AT ALL. I HAVE FEELGS, TOO.” MEECHAM DON’T THK BEG A TOTAL TOP IS FLUENCED BY MASCULY, BUT NOT THAT HE PREFERS TALLER BOTTOMS. “MAYBE THERE IS AN UNRLYG ELEMENT OF MASCULY THERE,” HE NFS.GETTYHOMOSEXUAL UPLE {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}“I THK THAT, AS A BROAD STATEMENT, TOPS ARE THE FACTO ‘GROUP POWER,’ TO E POWER DYNAMIC TERMOLOGY,” RYAN, A 32-YEAR-OLD TOTAL TOP, SAYS. “A TOP WOULD GENERALLY BE SCRIBED AS MORE MASCULE AND EMPOWERED—ALL OF WHICH I DISAGREE WH.” TO MEECHAM’S POT, RYAN SAYS HE’S RECEIVED RIDICULE THE PAST, WH BOTTOMS SAYG SENSIVE THGS LIKE, “REALLY? YOU’RE A TOP? YOU N’T BE. HOW WOULD THE BOTTOM FEEL ANYTHG?”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}WHILE MOST TOPS I SPOKE TO WERE SISTENT THAT THEIR POSNAL PREFERENCE IS NOT TIED TO MASCULY, NEARLY ALL OF THEIR TTIMONI NTAED SLIPS THAT HTED OTHERWISE. “IN GENERAL, I DON’T THK WE’VE LOOSENED THE ASSOCIATN BETWEEN TOPPG AND MASCULY,” SHUPE SAYS. “THAT SAID, THIS NNECTN ISN’T UNIVERSAL AMONG GAY MEN, NOR HAS EVER BEEN. IT’S JT MON.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}SCE WE’VE E SUCH A LONG WAY QUEER ACCEPTANCE, I WAS CUR IF THIS PREVALENCE OF PERFORMATIVE MASCULY AMONG GAY MEN IS MORE OF A GENERATNAL {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}SHUPE IS SKEPTIL. “I’M NOT SURE IF THERE’S A DIFFERENCE HOW OLR OR YOUNGER GAY MEN UNRSTAND TOPPG AND BOTTOMG AS GENRED,” HE SAYS. “IN MY OWN WORK, I SEE PLENTY OF OLR MEN WILLG TO TOP AND YOUNGER MEN UNWILLG TO BOTTOM. SO, I’M NOT SURE IF AGE IS A FACTOR HERE.” RATHER, HE THKS OUR STGGLE TO PERFORM OR TABLISH MASCULY HAS ALWAYS PLAGUED OUR MUNY; JT MANIFTS DIFFERENT {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}“IN THE 1970S, CLON ["A MCLE-BOUND, SEXUALLY EE, HARD-LIVG MARLBORO MAN"] ASSERTED THEIR MASCULY AGAST NELLY QUEENS; TODAY, BEARS ASSERT THEIR MASCULY AGAST TWKS,” SHUPE SAYS. “TOTAL TOPS ASSERTG THEIR MASCULY AGAST GAY MEN WHO BOTTOM ARE JT ANOTHER RNATN OF GAY MEN CLAIMG MASCULY BY NTRASTG THEMSELV AGAST OTHER, MORE FEME, GAY MEN.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}STILL, I REMA HOPEFUL. WH A NOTABLE CREASE LGBTQ REPRENTATN OF ALL SORTS MEDIA, AND BOTTOMS, FEMS, ETC., PROUDLY GATHERG SOCIAL SPAC (I SEE YOU, GAY TWTER!), THERE SEEMS TO BE A CELEBRATN OF PEOPLE WHO MAY VIATE OM WHAT’S BEEN CULTURALLY NSIRED ATTRACTIVE THE QUEER {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}THIS IS NOT ONLY BEG REFLECTED OUR OWN MUNY, BUT AMONG STRAIGHT FOLKS, AS WELL. THE NCEPT OF WHAT’S MASCULE WAS A POPULAR TOPIC MASTREAM MEDIA LAST YEAR. NOTABLY, GQ—A CULTURAL BIBLE FOR STRAIGHT MEN—PUBLISHED S “NEW MASCULY” ISSUE, FEATURG PHARRELL WILLIAMS, WHERE THE AWARD-WNG MICIAN AND PRODUCER SCRIBED MASCULY AS A “SPIRUAL WAR” WH ONELF—AS EXPECTED, THE IMPLITN WAS MET WH CRICISM OM MORE NSERVATIVE {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}WHILE THE MASCULE GAY MALE HOLDS CERTA REIGN THE ZEGEIST, WE’RE CHIPPG AWAY AT THE FA, ENURAGG MEN TO EMBRACE WHAT’S NATURAL, NOT EXPECTED. IN THIS REGARD, I SAY TO TOPS: IF YOU TOP BEE ’S THE POSN YOU ENJOY, DO YOU—KEEP POUNDG ASS. BUT IF YOU LIM YOURSELF DUE TO SOCIETAL PERCEPTN, DO YOURSELF A FAVOR AND GIVE BOTTOMG A CHANCE—BEE TAK A REAL MAN TO TAKE A {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;CLEAR:BOTH;}LOVE AND {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;MARG:0 TO;WIDTH:90%;M-WIDTH:288PX;MAX-WIDTH:1440PX;M-HEIGHT:194PX;}LATT NEWS
- TOTAL TOPS AND BOTTOMS SHARE WHY THEY REFE TO BE VERS"I FEEL MOST NFINT BOTTOMG."{FONT:NORMAL 800 1.2REM/1.2 "D BOLD",SANS-SERIF;TEXT-TRANSFORM:NORMAL;LOR:HER;DISPLAY:LE-BLOCK;PADDG-BOTTOM:6PX;POSN:RELATIVE;TEXT-TRANSFORM:UPPERSE;}{BACKGROUND:#89308A;BOTTOM:0;NTENT:'';DISPLAY:BLOCK;HEIGHT:2PX;LEFT:0;POSN:ABSOLUTE;RIGHT:0;-WEBK-TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;WIDTH:100%;}{LEFT:51%;RIGHT:51%;WIDTH:0;}{FONT:NORMAL 800 1.2REM/1.2 "D BOLD",SANS-SERIF;TEXT-TRANSFORM:NORMAL;LOR:HER;DISPLAY:LE-BLOCK;PADDG-BOTTOM:6PX;POSN:RELATIVE;TEXT-TRANSFORM:UPPERSE;}{BACKGROUND:#89308A;BOTTOM:0;NTENT:'';DISPLAY:BLOCK;HEIGHT:2PX;LEFT:0;POSN:ABSOLUTE;RIGHT:0;-WEBK-TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;WIDTH:100%;}{LEFT:51%;RIGHT:51%;WIDTH:0;}CULTUREBY BOBBY BOXNOVEMBER 19, 2021/1:35 {HEIGHT:HER;DISPLAY:-WEBK-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-FLEX;DISPLAY:-MS-FLEXBOX;DISPLAY:FLEX;POSN:RELATIVE;-WEBK-FLEX-WRAP:WRAP;-MS-FLEX-WRAP:WRAP;FLEX-WRAP:WRAP;-WEBK-ALIGN-EMS:CENTER;-WEBK-BOX-ALIGN:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-ALIGN:CENTER;ALIGN-EMS:CENTER;-WEBK-BOX-PACK:CENTER;-WEBK-JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-PACK:CENTER;JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-WEBK-TRANSFORM-ORIG:CENTER;-MS-TRANSFORM-ORIG:CENTER;TRANSFORM-ORIG:CENTER;} IMG{HEIGHT:100%;WIDTH:100%;OBJECT-F:VER;}{HEIGHT:4912PX;WIDTH:7360PX;}GETTY IMAGSHOT A YOUNG UPLE HAVG AN ARGUMENT THE BEDROOM AT HOMEBY BOBBY BOXNOVEMBER 19, 2021 / 1:35 PM{"@NTEXT":","@TYPE":"NEWSARTICLE","HEADLE":"TOTAL TOPS AND BOTTOMS SHARE WHY THEY REFE TO BE VERS","THUMBNAILURL":","DATEPUBLISHED":"2021-11-19T18:35:41.000+0000","DATEMODIFIED":"2021-11-19T18:35:41.000+0000","IMAGE":{"@NTEXT":","@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT","URL":","WIDTH":1920,"HEIGHT":1080},"URL":","THOR":{"@TYPE":"ORGANIZATN","NAME":"LOGO TV"},"MAENTYOFPAGE":{"@TYPE":"WEBPAGE","@ID":"},"PUBLISHER":{"@TYPE":"ORGANIZATN","@ID":","NAME":"LOGO TV","URL":","LOGO":{"@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT"}},"CREATOR":"BOBBY BOX","KEYWORDS":"LOVE AND SEX","ARTICLESECTN":"CULTURE"}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}WHEN TO POSNAL PREFERENC, VERSATILY IS LARGELY REGARD AS THE MOST PROGRSIVE OPTN FOR QUEER MEN. STICKG TO THE BARY OF “TOP” AND “BOTTOM” N LIM WHAT ONE DO THE BEDROOM, AND QUEER FOLKS SHOULD FEEL EMPOWERED TO FUCK WHOEVER AND HOWEVER THEY {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}IN THEORY, THIS THKG TRACKS, BUT DON’T ALWAYS HOLD UP PRACTICE. AFTER SPEAKG WH MANY GAY, BISEXUAL, AND QUEER MEN WHO INTIFY AS “TOTAL TOPS” OR “TOTAL BOTTOMS” (MEANG THEY HAVE NO SIRE TO DIVERSIFY THEIR POSNAL PREFERENCE), I'VE LEARNED ABOUT A NUMBER OF LEGIMATE REASONS ONE MAY HAVE NO TERT SWCHG {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}ANTHONY, A 35-YEAR-OLD GAY MAN AND “G OUT ACH,” INTIFI AS A TOTAL TOP. HE HAS ONLY BOTTOMED ONCE HIS LIFE, AND ALTHOUGH WASN’T BAD, HE HAS “NO TERT” BEG VERSATILE. “I'M STRICTLY A TOP BEE BOTTOMG IS PAFUL, EASY AS THAT,” HE TELLS {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}ANTHONY ALSO SAYS BOTTOMG IS “TIED TO SUBMISSN” FOR HIM, A MON ASSOCIATN AMONG QUEER MEN ROOTED TOXIC MASCULY. IN FACT, ONE STUDY FOUND TOPS ARE MOST LIKELY TO MANIFT HIGHER LEVELS OF TERNALIZED HOMOPHOBIA AND MORE LIKELY TO REJECT A GAY {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}“REARCH DO SHOW THAT TOPS ARE MORE LIKELY TO INTIFY AS TRADNALLY MASCULE OR DOMANT, SO TOPPG MAY BE A PART OF THAT MASCULE OR DOMANT INTY,” DR. TREVOR HART, A CLIL PSYCHOLOGIST AND BEHAVRAL SCIENTIST FOCG ON THE SEXUAL AND MENTAL HEALTH OF MEN WHO HAVE SEX WH MEN, TELLS LOGO.GETTY IMAGSAD GAY MAN HAVG PROBLEMS WH HIS BOYIEND {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}FOR SELF-SCRIBED “REER BOTTOM” ROLANDO, 29, NFINCE PLAYS A LARGE PART HIS RIGID POSNAL PREFERENCE. “I DID TOP ONE TIME WH MY THEN-BOYIEND, BUT ’S NOT WHAT I LIKE OR EXCEL AT,” HE SAYS. “THAT, TURN, HAS CREATED A B OF ERTIA, WHERE BEE ’S WHAT I’VE DONE THE MOST, I FEEL MOST NFINT BOTTOMG.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}ROLANDO EXPLAS THAT EVEN WH A PARTNER HE LOVED, HE STILL EXPERIENCED CHALLENG LIKE STAYG HARD AND FDG A POSN THAT WORKED FOR BOTH HIM AND HIS PARTNER. “I'D SENTIALLY HAVE TO FD SOMEONE WHO IS WILLG TO AL WH A BEGNER-TOP, WH MY PERFORMANCE ANXIETY AND STAYG HARD, AND ALL FOR SOMETHG THAT ULTIMATELY DON’T EVEN FEEL THAT GOOD TO ME? I'D RATHER JT BOTTOM.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}DR. HART’S REARCH, WHICH POLLED 205 GAY MALE PARTICIPANTS ON SUBJECTS LIKE SELF-LABELS AND SEXUAL BEHAVR, WAS PUBLISHED THE JOURNAL OF SEX REARCH 2003. HE UNVERED A NUMBER OF TERTG RRELATNS, CLUDG THAT VERSATIL SEEM TO ENJOY BETTER PSYCHOLOGIL HEALTH, WHICH ULD BE DUE TO THEIR GREATER SEXUAL SENSATN-SEEKG, RCED FEARS AROUND SEX, AND GREATER FORT WH A VARIETY OF ROL AND {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}“ON THE OTHER HAND, TOTAL BOTTOMS MIGHT PERCEIVE TOPPG TO BE TOO DOMANT OR UNFORTABLE, OR THAT THEY BELIEVE THAT THEY WILL NOT BE ABLE TO PERFORM, TO HAVE AN ASM, OR TO PLEASURE THEIR PARTNER WHILE TOPPG,” HART {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}SHAME ASSOCIATED WH PENIS SIZE OR SHAPE WAS ANOTHER PREVAILG FACTOR AMONG THE MEN I TERVIEWED. “THE MA REASON I DON’T TOP IS BEE MY DICK ISN’T REALLY SHAPED A WAY THAT MAK FORTABLE,” BNO, A 23-YEAR-OLD WHO HAS ONLY TOPPED ONCE, SHAR. “IT’S ALMOST STRAIGHT UP AND DON’T LIKE TO BEND OUTWARD OR FORWARD WHEN FULLY HARD. I ALSO DON’T EXPERIENCE AS MUCH SENSATN AS I THK MOST PEOPLE DO, SO ’S JT UNFORTABLE.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}THEN THE PRSURE OM SIZE QUEENS. REARCH PUBLISHED THE ARCHIV OF SEXUAL BEHAVR 2010 FOUND THAT THE SMALLER SOMEBODY PERCEIVED THE SIZE OF THEIR PENIS, THE MORE LIKELY THEY WERE TO INTIFY AS A BOTTOM. AFTER SURVEYG 1,065 GAY AND BISEXUAL MEN, ONLY 29.2% OF TOPS FALL UNR “BELOW AVERAGE” PENIS SIZE, PARED TO 32% OF VERSATIL AND 39% OF BOTTOMS. CONVERSELY, THE BIGGER THEIR PERCEIVED PENIS SIZE, THE MORE LIKELY SUBJECTS WERE TO INTIFY AS {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}REARCHERS NCLUD MASCULY WAS YET AGA A POTENTIAL FACTOR SCE ONE’S PENIS SIZE IS OFTEN ACCURATELY REGARD AS A SYMBOL OF ONE’S GREE OF MASCULY, AND JUDGEMENT OM SEXUAL PARTNERS MIGHT MAKE SOMEONE WH AN AVERAGE OR SMALLER-THAN-AVERAGE PENIS LS NFINT TOPPG.GETTY IMAGMAN'S HAND HOLDS H RIPE EGGPLANT ON A WHE BACKGROUND. HARVTG NCEPT. AN ALLEGORY ON THE SIZE OF MALE SEX OGANS. SIZE PARISON. IMAG FOR THE MALE DOCTOR'S {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}INFLEXIBLE POSNAL PREFERENC N ALSO STEM OM TRMATIC SEXUAL EXPERIENC. INGO, 50, WAS AN ABIVE RELATNSHIP FOR 18 MONTHS AND SAYS HE WAS SEXUALLY ASSLTED THROUGHOUT. HE NOW INTIFI AS A TOTAL {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}“IT WAS A MIX OF ERCN, THREATS TO THROW ME OUT AND LL MY GRANDFATHER TO SPILL ALL THE TAILS OF OUR SEX LIFE,” HE TELLS LOGO. “THE KICKER WAS THAT HE HIMSELF WAS A BOTTOM MOST OF HIS LIFE, SO RETROSPECT, I ASSUME THAT WAS AN EARLY EXAMPLE OF AN INTY CRISIS BORRG ON FALSE IAS OF MASCULY ON HIS END.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}INGO HAS TRIED BOTTOMG THE 30 YEARS SCE THAT ABIVE RELATNSHIP, BUT HE WASN'T ABLE TO ENJOY EVEN WH ANOTHER PAST PARTNER HE TSTED. “I SOMETIM WONR IF THERE WAS SOMETHG TAKEN AWAY OM ME,” HE ADMS AFTER A PSE. “BUT THE CURSY AND THE WISH TO EXPERIMENT WENT UP SMOKE.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}THE ARE JT A FEW OF THE MANY MSAG I RECEIVED OM TOTAL TOPS AND BOTTOMS WHO WERE GRAC WH THEIR VULNERABILY. AND WHILE ONE MIGHT LOGILLY ASSUME THAT SOMEONE’S SEXUAL PREFERENCE IS TERMED BY THEIR LIK AND DISLIK THE BEDROOM, REARCH AND TTIMONY SUGGTS IS NOT THAT SIMPLE. EVEN AMONG THE RELATIVELY SMALL SAMPLG OF TOTAL TOPS AND BOTTOMS I TERVIEWED, MOST NFSED THEY’D ONLY TRIED THE OPPOSG POSN ONCE OR A FEW {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}INTRIGUED, I ASKED HART IF HE THKS SOCIAL PRSUR MIGHT ECLIPSE ONE’S ACTUAL ENJOYMENT THEIR INTI. HE SAYS IS LIKELY TE FOR A LOT OF MEN. “IF A GUY HAS NCERNS ABOUT KEEPG ERECTNS OR ABOUT PLEASURG HIS PARTNER AS A TOP, HE IS UNLIKELY TO TOP. THIS IS ALSO THE SE FOR GUYS WHO’VE BEEN TOLD THEY AREN’T GREAT AT BOTTOMG.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}STRIPPED OF ALL NUANCE, NVENTNAL IAS OF WHAT IS “MASCULE” APPEAR TO PLAY A LARGE ROLE HOW QUEER MEN HAVE SEX. WHETHER THIS MANIFTS OUR NFINCE, OUR PERCEPTN OF SIZE, OR THE REPERCSNS OF A PAST PARTNER'S OWN TERNALIZED BIAS, SEEMS MOST OF ARE WILLG AND OPEN TO BE MORE VERSATILE. WE JT LACK THE SELF-ASSURANCE TO ACT ON {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}AT THE END OF THE DAY, SEX IS BT WHEN YOU DO WHAT MAK YOU MOST FORTABLE, SO SET BOUNDARI AND DO YOU. BUT PERHAPS THE RMATN ABOVE WILL MAKE SOME RENSIR WHY THEY AREN’T OPEN TO EXPERIENCG A FULLER SPECTM OF {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;CLEAR:BOTH;}LOVE AND {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;MARG:0 TO;WIDTH:90%;M-WIDTH:288PX;MAX-WIDTH:1440PX;M-HEIGHT:194PX;}LATT NEWS
- PENIS SIZE AND PREFERRED SEXUAL ROL AMONG GAY MEN
- ALL THE OPENLY GAY MALE CELEBS WHO ARE OUT, PROUD & SMOK’ HOT
A GAY UPLE RAN A RAL RTRANT PEACE. THEN NEW NEIGHBORS ARRIVED.
* gay mens tops *
The bsman and his wife, Melissa, first plaed to the Front Porch proprietors about pre-dawn vendor liveri 2019, not long after the nservative Christian uple moved their fancial firm right next door to the rtrant, which fli a gay Pri flag. (Front Porch Market and Grill)What’s more, the Washers say, the ad rat was jt one more sult that the uple, who once planted an “all liv matter” sign their ont yard, have endured sce movg next door to a rtrant owned by a gay uple. They married 2020, five years after they opened the Front Porch, which quickly beme a statn The Front Porch has been flyg a Pri flag on s pat sce 2016, not long after a gunman killed 49 people a gay bar Orlando.
Waybourn was print of the Dallas Gay Alliance when sued Parkland Memorial Hospal for failg to provi readily available medic to AIDS patients.
NFL'S KEV MAXEN COM OUT AS GAY, MAK HISTORY AS FIRST OUT MALE COACH MEN'S PROFSNAL SPORTS
What's preventg some gay men om openg their mds (and bodi) to bottomg? * gay mens tops *
In 1991, he lnched the Gay and Lbian Victory Fund (now the LGBTQ+ Victory Fund) to elect openly gay policians to office. He served as managg director of the Gay & Lbian Alliance Agast Defamatn, or GLAAD, which he helped turn to a natnal group.
FOR THE "TOTAL TOPS," MASCULY IS A PRISONWHAT'S PREVENTG SOME GAY MEN OM OPENG THEIR MDS (AND BODI) TO BOTTOMG?{FONT:NORMAL 800 1.2REM/1.2 "D BOLD",SANS-SERIF;TEXT-TRANSFORM:NORMAL;LOR:HER;DISPLAY:LE-BLOCK;PADDG-BOTTOM:6PX;POSN:RELATIVE;TEXT-TRANSFORM:UPPERSE;}{BACKGROUND:#89308A;BOTTOM:0;NTENT:'';DISPLAY:BLOCK;HEIGHT:2PX;LEFT:0;POSN:ABSOLUTE;RIGHT:0;-WEBK-TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;WIDTH:100%;}{LEFT:51%;RIGHT:51%;WIDTH:0;}{FONT:NORMAL 800 1.2REM/1.2 "D BOLD",SANS-SERIF;TEXT-TRANSFORM:NORMAL;LOR:HER;DISPLAY:LE-BLOCK;PADDG-BOTTOM:6PX;POSN:RELATIVE;TEXT-TRANSFORM:UPPERSE;}{BACKGROUND:#89308A;BOTTOM:0;NTENT:'';DISPLAY:BLOCK;HEIGHT:2PX;LEFT:0;POSN:ABSOLUTE;RIGHT:0;-WEBK-TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;WIDTH:100%;}{LEFT:51%;RIGHT:51%;WIDTH:0;}LIFEBY BOBBY BOXFEBARY 12, 2020/12:10 {HEIGHT:HER;DISPLAY:-WEBK-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-FLEX;DISPLAY:-MS-FLEXBOX;DISPLAY:FLEX;POSN:RELATIVE;-WEBK-FLEX-WRAP:WRAP;-MS-FLEX-WRAP:WRAP;FLEX-WRAP:WRAP;-WEBK-ALIGN-EMS:CENTER;-WEBK-BOX-ALIGN:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-ALIGN:CENTER;ALIGN-EMS:CENTER;-WEBK-BOX-PACK:CENTER;-WEBK-JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-PACK:CENTER;JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-WEBK-TRANSFORM-ORIG:CENTER;-MS-TRANSFORM-ORIG:CENTER;TRANSFORM-ORIG:CENTER;} IMG{HEIGHT:100%;WIDTH:100%;OBJECT-F:VER;}{HEIGHT:2048PX;WIDTH:3072PX;}GETTYBY BOBBY BOXFEBARY 12, 2020 / 12:10 PM{"@NTEXT":","@TYPE":"NEWSARTICLE","HEADLE":"FOR THE \"TOTAL TOPS,\" MASCULY IS A PRISON","THUMBNAILURL":","DATEPUBLISHED":"2020-02-12T17:10:33.000+0000","DATEMODIFIED":"2020-02-12T17:10:33.000+0000","IMAGE":{"@NTEXT":","@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT","URL":","WIDTH":1920,"HEIGHT":1080},"URL":","THOR":{"@TYPE":"ORGANIZATN","NAME":"LOGO TV"},"MAENTYOFPAGE":{"@TYPE":"WEBPAGE","@ID":"},"PUBLISHER":{"@TYPE":"ORGANIZATN","@ID":","NAME":"LOGO TV","URL":","LOGO":{"@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT"}},"CREATOR":"BOBBY BOX","KEYWORDS":"LOVE AND SEX","ARTICLESECTN":"LIFE"}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}THE FIRST MAN I EVER DATED INTIFIED AS A "TOTAL TOP." HE WAS 20 YEARS MY SENR, HAD A REPUTATN FOR FUCKG GUYS GYM SHOWERS, AND, FTGLY, BROKE UP WH ME BEE I WAS KEEPG HIM OM THE {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}FRH OUT OF THE CLOSET, I WAS EAGER AND TERRIFIED TO EXPLORE ALL ASPECTS OF MY NEWLY REALIZED SEXUALY WH HIM. HOWEVER, DUE TO VAR FACTORS, WE NEVER HAD PERATIVE SEX, WHICH ULTIMATELY LED HIM TO STRAY. IN ADDN, HE EXPLIBLY NEVER WANTED TO EQUENT QUEER SPAC, SISTG THE MUNY WAS TOXIC WHILE ASSURG ME I “WASN’T MISSG ANYTHG.” HE WAS A MAN OF MYSTERY AND THAT IS WHAT IALLY DREW ME TO {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}BUT THERE WAS ONE THG ABOUT HIM THAT I KNEW FOR {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}I DUCED THAT HIS ABSOLUTE REFAL TO BOTTOM—PAIRED WH ALWAYS PAYG, DRIVG, AND DOG HANDY-WORK AROUND MY HOE (SPE EXPRSG THAT I’D LIKE TO DO THE THGS, TOO)—WAS A PLEX OF SORTS. FOR HIM, BEG A TOTAL TOP NTRIBUTED EPLY TO HIS CHARACTER. LIKE THE MCL, THE GFF VOICE, THE BODY HAIR, AND ALL THE OTHER TRIMMGS OF A TRADNALLY MASCULE PERSONA, BEG A TOTAL TOP MA HIM FEEL “MANLY.”GETTYCOUPLE OF HANDSOME GAY MEN, THEIR UNRWEAR, BED TOGETHER TOGETHER WH ONE OF THEM LOOKG AT THE {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}OF URSE, I KNOW THERE ARE OTHER PRACTIL AND PREFERENTIAL REASONS AS TO WHY SOME QUEER MEN TOP THAT DON’T HAVE TO DO WH PERFORMATIVE MASCULY. BUT I WANT TO KNOW IF MASCULY’S FLUENCE IS SO STRONG THAT PREVENTS TOTAL TOPS OM OPENG THEIR MDS (AND BODI) TO DIFFERENT SEXUAL {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}THE SHORT ANSWER IS Y. ACRDG TO KYLE SHUPE, A DOCTORAL STUNT SOCLOGY AT THE UNIVERSY OF CCNATI, WHO REARCH QUEER MEN’S SEXUAL PRACTIC, INTI, AND MUNI, TOTAL TOPS ARE CHARACTERIZED MORE BY THEIR SENSE OF MASCULY THAN THEIR ACTUAL SEXUAL {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}“OFTENTIM, TOPPG IS ED BY THE MEN TO ASSERT THEIR MASCULY RELATN TO ANOTHER— THEIR MDS—MORE EFFEMATE GAY MEN AND ANYONE WHO BOTTOMS,” HE TELLS ME, EXPLAG MEN WHO CLAIM THEY’RE TOTAL TOPS ARE REALLY SAYG: “I’M GAY, AND ALSO MASCULE,” OR THE EVER-POPULAR, “I’M NOT LIKE THOSE OTHER GAYS.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}SAY WHAT YOU WILL, BUT THIS PERCEPTN IS NOT ALWAYS MISPLACED. SOME REARCH NFIRMS TOPS ARE NSIRED "MORE MASCULE" AND, AS SUCH, NOT BOTTOMG HELPS THEM MATA MASCULY THEIR GAY INTY. “THE ASSOCIATN OF TOPPG WH MASCULY AND BOTTOMG WH FEMY IS GRAED MUCH OF GAY MEN’S CULTURE,” SHUPE SAYS, FOR WHICH HE C TWO {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}FIRST, BEE WE DRAW ON HETERONORMATIVE SEXUAL SCRIPTS WHEN AMG GAY SEX; WE’RE TGHT THAT STRAIGHT SEX IS CHARACTERIZED BY A DOMANT, MASCULE MALE WHO PERAT A SUBMISSIVE, FEME FEMALE. “GAY MEN E A SIAR AMEWORK WH TOPS AND BOTTOMS, WHERE THE BOTTOM IS ASSUMG THE WOMAN’S ROLE AS THE RECEPTIVE PARTNER,” SHUPE {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}SHUPE’S SEND TIMATN IS THAT, BEE REARCH HAS SHOWN THAT MASCULE MEN ARE SOCIALLY, POLILLY, ENOMILLY, AND CULTURALLY ADVANTAGED NORTH AMERI (THE GENR PAY GAP, REPRENTATN CONGRS, AND PICTNS FILM ARE A FEW EXAMPL), THEY RECEIVE GREATER SOCIAL BENEFS PARED TO MEN WHO DISPLAY TRAS ASSOCIATED WH FEMY.GETTYBEHD {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}CONNELL ARGU THAT, PATRIARCHAL SOCIETI, GAY MEN ARE SEEN AS LACKG MASCULY PARED TO STRAIGHT MEN, SO—LIKE WOMEN AND NONBARY FOLKS—GAY MEN HAVE FEWER OPPORTUNI AND ADVANTAG {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}“HOWEVER, THIS ISN'T TOTALIZG AS GAY MEN N PERFORM MASCULY TO ACCS SOME OF THE BENEFS, WHICH IS WHAT TOTAL TOPS ARE TAPPG TO,” SHUPE SAYS. REARCH SHOWS GAY MEN, PARTICULAR, PERFORM MASCULY FOR A NUMBER OF REASONS, CLUDG APPEARG MORE ATTRACTIVE TO OTHER MEN AND MATAG FAY {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}“IN THE U.S., GAY MEN ARE CULTURALLY STEREOTYPED AS EFFEMATE, SO WE’RE SOCIALLY VALUED PARED TO STRAIGHT MEN,” SHUPE EXPLAS. “THEREFORE, GAY MEN WHO SIRE THE SOCIAL BENEFS MAY POSN THEMSELV AS MORE MASCULE THAN OTHER GAY MEN.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}TO MY SURPRISE, SPEAKG WH MANY SELF-PROFSED TOTAL TOPS, NONE SEEMED TOO NCERNED WH BEG PERCEIVED AS MASCULE. HOWEVER, ANDREW, 25, DON’T NY S FLUENCE EHER. “I THK THAT THE PROJECTN OF MASCULY IS SO EPLY ROOTED —EVEN THROUGHOUT OUR YOUTH—THAT WE DON’T KNOW HOW EPLY GRAED IS .”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}ANDREW HAS BOTTOMED THE PAST, BUT ONLY WH THOSE HE WAS A MTED RELATNSHIP WH (A MON EXCEPTN AMONG TOTAL TOPS). “FOR ME, TAK A LOT OF TIME AND PATIENCE TO BE ABLE TO BOTTOM—AND I'M NOT A PATIENT PERSON.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}DYLAN, 27, HASN’T BOTTOMED OVER FIVE YEARS BEE BEG SUBMISSIVE DON’T E NATURAL TO HIM. WHILE HE DON’T GENERALLY REGARD BOTTOMS AS FEME, HE SAYS SOMETHG OUR NVERSATN THAT SUGGTS OTHERWISE: “MOST TOPS TEND TO BE FAIRLY MASCULE-ACTG.” HE WENT ON TO EXPLA HOW BOTTOMS TEND TO ENPASS A MORE DIVERSE SAMPLE OF GAY MEN, WHEREAS MOST STRICT TOPS ARE “FAIRLY TYPIL,” WHICH HE FAILED TO EXPLA {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}FOR SOME, THE MASCULE NNOTATN HAS S DISADVANTAG. “I THK BOTTOMS REGARD TOPS THE SAME WAY STRAIGHT MEN REGARD WOMEN: WE’RE A NQUT, A SEXUAL PRIZE, BUT NOT REALLY ANYTHG ELSE—JT DICK,” MEECHAM, 32, SAYS. AS A BLACK MAN AND TOTAL TOP, HE WNS THIS FETISHIZATN TENFOLD. “IT'S EXCG AT FIRST, BUT WHEN HAPPENS A THOAND TIM, 'S NOT A GREAT FEELG AT ALL. I HAVE FEELGS, TOO.” MEECHAM DON’T THK BEG A TOTAL TOP IS FLUENCED BY MASCULY, BUT NOT THAT HE PREFERS TALLER BOTTOMS. “MAYBE THERE IS AN UNRLYG ELEMENT OF MASCULY THERE,” HE NFS.GETTYHOMOSEXUAL UPLE {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}“I THK THAT, AS A BROAD STATEMENT, TOPS ARE THE FACTO ‘GROUP POWER,’ TO E POWER DYNAMIC TERMOLOGY,” RYAN, A 32-YEAR-OLD TOTAL TOP, SAYS. “A TOP WOULD GENERALLY BE SCRIBED AS MORE MASCULE AND EMPOWERED—ALL OF WHICH I DISAGREE WH.” TO MEECHAM’S POT, RYAN SAYS HE’S RECEIVED RIDICULE THE PAST, WH BOTTOMS SAYG SENSIVE THGS LIKE, “REALLY? YOU’RE A TOP? YOU N’T BE. HOW WOULD THE BOTTOM FEEL ANYTHG?”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}WHILE MOST TOPS I SPOKE TO WERE SISTENT THAT THEIR POSNAL PREFERENCE IS NOT TIED TO MASCULY, NEARLY ALL OF THEIR TTIMONI NTAED SLIPS THAT HTED OTHERWISE. “IN GENERAL, I DON’T THK WE’VE LOOSENED THE ASSOCIATN BETWEEN TOPPG AND MASCULY,” SHUPE SAYS. “THAT SAID, THIS NNECTN ISN’T UNIVERSAL AMONG GAY MEN, NOR HAS EVER BEEN. IT’S JT MON.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}SCE WE’VE E SUCH A LONG WAY QUEER ACCEPTANCE, I WAS CUR IF THIS PREVALENCE OF PERFORMATIVE MASCULY AMONG GAY MEN IS MORE OF A GENERATNAL {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}SHUPE IS SKEPTIL. “I’M NOT SURE IF THERE’S A DIFFERENCE HOW OLR OR YOUNGER GAY MEN UNRSTAND TOPPG AND BOTTOMG AS GENRED,” HE SAYS. “IN MY OWN WORK, I SEE PLENTY OF OLR MEN WILLG TO TOP AND YOUNGER MEN UNWILLG TO BOTTOM. SO, I’M NOT SURE IF AGE IS A FACTOR HERE.” RATHER, HE THKS OUR STGGLE TO PERFORM OR TABLISH MASCULY HAS ALWAYS PLAGUED OUR MUNY; JT MANIFTS DIFFERENT {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}“IN THE 1970S, CLON ["A MCLE-BOUND, SEXUALLY EE, HARD-LIVG MARLBORO MAN"] ASSERTED THEIR MASCULY AGAST NELLY QUEENS; TODAY, BEARS ASSERT THEIR MASCULY AGAST TWKS,” SHUPE SAYS. “TOTAL TOPS ASSERTG THEIR MASCULY AGAST GAY MEN WHO BOTTOM ARE JT ANOTHER RNATN OF GAY MEN CLAIMG MASCULY BY NTRASTG THEMSELV AGAST OTHER, MORE FEME, GAY MEN.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}STILL, I REMA HOPEFUL. WH A NOTABLE CREASE LGBTQ REPRENTATN OF ALL SORTS MEDIA, AND BOTTOMS, FEMS, ETC., PROUDLY GATHERG SOCIAL SPAC (I SEE YOU, GAY TWTER!), THERE SEEMS TO BE A CELEBRATN OF PEOPLE WHO MAY VIATE OM WHAT’S BEEN CULTURALLY NSIRED ATTRACTIVE THE QUEER {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}THIS IS NOT ONLY BEG REFLECTED OUR OWN MUNY, BUT AMONG STRAIGHT FOLKS, AS WELL. THE NCEPT OF WHAT’S MASCULE WAS A POPULAR TOPIC MASTREAM MEDIA LAST YEAR. NOTABLY, GQ—A CULTURAL BIBLE FOR STRAIGHT MEN—PUBLISHED S “NEW MASCULY” ISSUE, FEATURG PHARRELL WILLIAMS, WHERE THE AWARD-WNG MICIAN AND PRODUCER SCRIBED MASCULY AS A “SPIRUAL WAR” WH ONELF—AS EXPECTED, THE IMPLITN WAS MET WH CRICISM OM MORE NSERVATIVE {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}WHILE THE MASCULE GAY MALE HOLDS CERTA REIGN THE ZEGEIST, WE’RE CHIPPG AWAY AT THE FA, ENURAGG MEN TO EMBRACE WHAT’S NATURAL, NOT EXPECTED. IN THIS REGARD, I SAY TO TOPS: IF YOU TOP BEE ’S THE POSN YOU ENJOY, DO YOU—KEEP POUNDG ASS. BUT IF YOU LIM YOURSELF DUE TO SOCIETAL PERCEPTN, DO YOURSELF A FAVOR AND GIVE BOTTOMG A CHANCE—BEE TAK A REAL MAN TO TAKE A {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;CLEAR:BOTH;}LOVE AND {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;MARG:0 TO;WIDTH:90%;M-WIDTH:288PX;MAX-WIDTH:1440PX;M-HEIGHT:194PX;}LATT NEWS
He owned gay newspapers Hoton, Atlanta, New York and Washgton. “I had so many threats agast me that even the Dallas police statned squad rs outsi our home, ” Waybourn an activist, Waybourn says, his goals were clear: same-sex marriage, gays and lbians the ary, accs to lifavg medic. To the activist, feels like a step backward after a lifetime of fightg for gay pack the seats at the Board of Zong Appeals hearg hosted at Grace Epispal Church.
“I have que a few gay iends, clients and a fay member, and I have patronized a gay-owned rtrant for years, ” he whether the Washers are tryg to remake The Plas to their image of Ameri — Whe, nservative, Christian — Melissa said, “I n see where you’re g om.
TOTAL TOPS AND BOTTOMS SHARE WHY THEY REFE TO BE VERS"I FEEL MOST NFINT BOTTOMG."{FONT:NORMAL 800 1.2REM/1.2 "D BOLD",SANS-SERIF;TEXT-TRANSFORM:NORMAL;LOR:HER;DISPLAY:LE-BLOCK;PADDG-BOTTOM:6PX;POSN:RELATIVE;TEXT-TRANSFORM:UPPERSE;}{BACKGROUND:#89308A;BOTTOM:0;NTENT:'';DISPLAY:BLOCK;HEIGHT:2PX;LEFT:0;POSN:ABSOLUTE;RIGHT:0;-WEBK-TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;WIDTH:100%;}{LEFT:51%;RIGHT:51%;WIDTH:0;}{FONT:NORMAL 800 1.2REM/1.2 "D BOLD",SANS-SERIF;TEXT-TRANSFORM:NORMAL;LOR:HER;DISPLAY:LE-BLOCK;PADDG-BOTTOM:6PX;POSN:RELATIVE;TEXT-TRANSFORM:UPPERSE;}{BACKGROUND:#89308A;BOTTOM:0;NTENT:'';DISPLAY:BLOCK;HEIGHT:2PX;LEFT:0;POSN:ABSOLUTE;RIGHT:0;-WEBK-TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;TRANSN:ALL 0.2S EASE;WIDTH:100%;}{LEFT:51%;RIGHT:51%;WIDTH:0;}CULTUREBY BOBBY BOXNOVEMBER 19, 2021/1:35 {HEIGHT:HER;DISPLAY:-WEBK-BOX;DISPLAY:-WEBK-FLEX;DISPLAY:-MS-FLEXBOX;DISPLAY:FLEX;POSN:RELATIVE;-WEBK-FLEX-WRAP:WRAP;-MS-FLEX-WRAP:WRAP;FLEX-WRAP:WRAP;-WEBK-ALIGN-EMS:CENTER;-WEBK-BOX-ALIGN:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-ALIGN:CENTER;ALIGN-EMS:CENTER;-WEBK-BOX-PACK:CENTER;-WEBK-JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-MS-FLEX-PACK:CENTER;JTIFY-NTENT:CENTER;-WEBK-TRANSFORM-ORIG:CENTER;-MS-TRANSFORM-ORIG:CENTER;TRANSFORM-ORIG:CENTER;} IMG{HEIGHT:100%;WIDTH:100%;OBJECT-F:VER;}{HEIGHT:4912PX;WIDTH:7360PX;}GETTY IMAGSHOT A YOUNG UPLE HAVG AN ARGUMENT THE BEDROOM AT HOMEBY BOBBY BOXNOVEMBER 19, 2021 / 1:35 PM{"@NTEXT":","@TYPE":"NEWSARTICLE","HEADLE":"TOTAL TOPS AND BOTTOMS SHARE WHY THEY REFE TO BE VERS","THUMBNAILURL":","DATEPUBLISHED":"2021-11-19T18:35:41.000+0000","DATEMODIFIED":"2021-11-19T18:35:41.000+0000","IMAGE":{"@NTEXT":","@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT","URL":","WIDTH":1920,"HEIGHT":1080},"URL":","THOR":{"@TYPE":"ORGANIZATN","NAME":"LOGO TV"},"MAENTYOFPAGE":{"@TYPE":"WEBPAGE","@ID":"},"PUBLISHER":{"@TYPE":"ORGANIZATN","@ID":","NAME":"LOGO TV","URL":","LOGO":{"@TYPE":"IMAGEOBJECT"}},"CREATOR":"BOBBY BOX","KEYWORDS":"LOVE AND SEX","ARTICLESECTN":"CULTURE"}{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}WHEN TO POSNAL PREFERENC, VERSATILY IS LARGELY REGARD AS THE MOST PROGRSIVE OPTN FOR QUEER MEN. STICKG TO THE BARY OF “TOP” AND “BOTTOM” N LIM WHAT ONE DO THE BEDROOM, AND QUEER FOLKS SHOULD FEEL EMPOWERED TO FUCK WHOEVER AND HOWEVER THEY {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}IN THEORY, THIS THKG TRACKS, BUT DON’T ALWAYS HOLD UP PRACTICE. AFTER SPEAKG WH MANY GAY, BISEXUAL, AND QUEER MEN WHO INTIFY AS “TOTAL TOPS” OR “TOTAL BOTTOMS” (MEANG THEY HAVE NO SIRE TO DIVERSIFY THEIR POSNAL PREFERENCE), I'VE LEARNED ABOUT A NUMBER OF LEGIMATE REASONS ONE MAY HAVE NO TERT SWCHG {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}ANTHONY, A 35-YEAR-OLD GAY MAN AND “G OUT ACH,” INTIFI AS A TOTAL TOP. HE HAS ONLY BOTTOMED ONCE HIS LIFE, AND ALTHOUGH WASN’T BAD, HE HAS “NO TERT” BEG VERSATILE. “I'M STRICTLY A TOP BEE BOTTOMG IS PAFUL, EASY AS THAT,” HE TELLS {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}ANTHONY ALSO SAYS BOTTOMG IS “TIED TO SUBMISSN” FOR HIM, A MON ASSOCIATN AMONG QUEER MEN ROOTED TOXIC MASCULY. IN FACT, ONE STUDY FOUND TOPS ARE MOST LIKELY TO MANIFT HIGHER LEVELS OF TERNALIZED HOMOPHOBIA AND MORE LIKELY TO REJECT A GAY {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}“REARCH DO SHOW THAT TOPS ARE MORE LIKELY TO INTIFY AS TRADNALLY MASCULE OR DOMANT, SO TOPPG MAY BE A PART OF THAT MASCULE OR DOMANT INTY,” DR. TREVOR HART, A CLIL PSYCHOLOGIST AND BEHAVRAL SCIENTIST FOCG ON THE SEXUAL AND MENTAL HEALTH OF MEN WHO HAVE SEX WH MEN, TELLS LOGO.GETTY IMAGSAD GAY MAN HAVG PROBLEMS WH HIS BOYIEND {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}FOR SELF-SCRIBED “REER BOTTOM” ROLANDO, 29, NFINCE PLAYS A LARGE PART HIS RIGID POSNAL PREFERENCE. “I DID TOP ONE TIME WH MY THEN-BOYIEND, BUT ’S NOT WHAT I LIKE OR EXCEL AT,” HE SAYS. “THAT, TURN, HAS CREATED A B OF ERTIA, WHERE BEE ’S WHAT I’VE DONE THE MOST, I FEEL MOST NFINT BOTTOMG.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}ROLANDO EXPLAS THAT EVEN WH A PARTNER HE LOVED, HE STILL EXPERIENCED CHALLENG LIKE STAYG HARD AND FDG A POSN THAT WORKED FOR BOTH HIM AND HIS PARTNER. “I'D SENTIALLY HAVE TO FD SOMEONE WHO IS WILLG TO AL WH A BEGNER-TOP, WH MY PERFORMANCE ANXIETY AND STAYG HARD, AND ALL FOR SOMETHG THAT ULTIMATELY DON’T EVEN FEEL THAT GOOD TO ME? I'D RATHER JT BOTTOM.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}DR. HART’S REARCH, WHICH POLLED 205 GAY MALE PARTICIPANTS ON SUBJECTS LIKE SELF-LABELS AND SEXUAL BEHAVR, WAS PUBLISHED THE JOURNAL OF SEX REARCH 2003. HE UNVERED A NUMBER OF TERTG RRELATNS, CLUDG THAT VERSATIL SEEM TO ENJOY BETTER PSYCHOLOGIL HEALTH, WHICH ULD BE DUE TO THEIR GREATER SEXUAL SENSATN-SEEKG, RCED FEARS AROUND SEX, AND GREATER FORT WH A VARIETY OF ROL AND {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}“ON THE OTHER HAND, TOTAL BOTTOMS MIGHT PERCEIVE TOPPG TO BE TOO DOMANT OR UNFORTABLE, OR THAT THEY BELIEVE THAT THEY WILL NOT BE ABLE TO PERFORM, TO HAVE AN ASM, OR TO PLEASURE THEIR PARTNER WHILE TOPPG,” HART {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}SHAME ASSOCIATED WH PENIS SIZE OR SHAPE WAS ANOTHER PREVAILG FACTOR AMONG THE MEN I TERVIEWED. “THE MA REASON I DON’T TOP IS BEE MY DICK ISN’T REALLY SHAPED A WAY THAT MAK FORTABLE,” BNO, A 23-YEAR-OLD WHO HAS ONLY TOPPED ONCE, SHAR. “IT’S ALMOST STRAIGHT UP AND DON’T LIKE TO BEND OUTWARD OR FORWARD WHEN FULLY HARD. I ALSO DON’T EXPERIENCE AS MUCH SENSATN AS I THK MOST PEOPLE DO, SO ’S JT UNFORTABLE.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}THEN THE PRSURE OM SIZE QUEENS. REARCH PUBLISHED THE ARCHIV OF SEXUAL BEHAVR 2010 FOUND THAT THE SMALLER SOMEBODY PERCEIVED THE SIZE OF THEIR PENIS, THE MORE LIKELY THEY WERE TO INTIFY AS A BOTTOM. AFTER SURVEYG 1,065 GAY AND BISEXUAL MEN, ONLY 29.2% OF TOPS FALL UNR “BELOW AVERAGE” PENIS SIZE, PARED TO 32% OF VERSATIL AND 39% OF BOTTOMS. CONVERSELY, THE BIGGER THEIR PERCEIVED PENIS SIZE, THE MORE LIKELY SUBJECTS WERE TO INTIFY AS {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}REARCHERS NCLUD MASCULY WAS YET AGA A POTENTIAL FACTOR SCE ONE’S PENIS SIZE IS OFTEN ACCURATELY REGARD AS A SYMBOL OF ONE’S GREE OF MASCULY, AND JUDGEMENT OM SEXUAL PARTNERS MIGHT MAKE SOMEONE WH AN AVERAGE OR SMALLER-THAN-AVERAGE PENIS LS NFINT TOPPG.GETTY IMAGMAN'S HAND HOLDS H RIPE EGGPLANT ON A WHE BACKGROUND. HARVTG NCEPT. AN ALLEGORY ON THE SIZE OF MALE SEX OGANS. SIZE PARISON. IMAG FOR THE MALE DOCTOR'S {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}INFLEXIBLE POSNAL PREFERENC N ALSO STEM OM TRMATIC SEXUAL EXPERIENC. INGO, 50, WAS AN ABIVE RELATNSHIP FOR 18 MONTHS AND SAYS HE WAS SEXUALLY ASSLTED THROUGHOUT. HE NOW INTIFI AS A TOTAL {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}“IT WAS A MIX OF ERCN, THREATS TO THROW ME OUT AND LL MY GRANDFATHER TO SPILL ALL THE TAILS OF OUR SEX LIFE,” HE TELLS LOGO. “THE KICKER WAS THAT HE HIMSELF WAS A BOTTOM MOST OF HIS LIFE, SO RETROSPECT, I ASSUME THAT WAS AN EARLY EXAMPLE OF AN INTY CRISIS BORRG ON FALSE IAS OF MASCULY ON HIS END.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}INGO HAS TRIED BOTTOMG THE 30 YEARS SCE THAT ABIVE RELATNSHIP, BUT HE WASN'T ABLE TO ENJOY EVEN WH ANOTHER PAST PARTNER HE TSTED. “I SOMETIM WONR IF THERE WAS SOMETHG TAKEN AWAY OM ME,” HE ADMS AFTER A PSE. “BUT THE CURSY AND THE WISH TO EXPERIMENT WENT UP SMOKE.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}THE ARE JT A FEW OF THE MANY MSAG I RECEIVED OM TOTAL TOPS AND BOTTOMS WHO WERE GRAC WH THEIR VULNERABILY. AND WHILE ONE MIGHT LOGILLY ASSUME THAT SOMEONE’S SEXUAL PREFERENCE IS TERMED BY THEIR LIK AND DISLIK THE BEDROOM, REARCH AND TTIMONY SUGGTS IS NOT THAT SIMPLE. EVEN AMONG THE RELATIVELY SMALL SAMPLG OF TOTAL TOPS AND BOTTOMS I TERVIEWED, MOST NFSED THEY’D ONLY TRIED THE OPPOSG POSN ONCE OR A FEW {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}INTRIGUED, I ASKED HART IF HE THKS SOCIAL PRSUR MIGHT ECLIPSE ONE’S ACTUAL ENJOYMENT THEIR INTI. HE SAYS IS LIKELY TE FOR A LOT OF MEN. “IF A GUY HAS NCERNS ABOUT KEEPG ERECTNS OR ABOUT PLEASURG HIS PARTNER AS A TOP, HE IS UNLIKELY TO TOP. THIS IS ALSO THE SE FOR GUYS WHO’VE BEEN TOLD THEY AREN’T GREAT AT BOTTOMG.”{BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}STRIPPED OF ALL NUANCE, NVENTNAL IAS OF WHAT IS “MASCULE” APPEAR TO PLAY A LARGE ROLE HOW QUEER MEN HAVE SEX. WHETHER THIS MANIFTS OUR NFINCE, OUR PERCEPTN OF SIZE, OR THE REPERCSNS OF A PAST PARTNER'S OWN TERNALIZED BIAS, SEEMS MOST OF ARE WILLG AND OPEN TO BE MORE VERSATILE. WE JT LACK THE SELF-ASSURANCE TO ACT ON {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;PADDG:24PX 0;} A{LOR:#354A4E;-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;TEXT-RATN:UNRLE;} A:HOVER, A:FOC{-WEBK-TEXT-RATN:NONE;TEXT-RATN:NONE;} B, STRONG{FONT-WEIGHT:700;}AT THE END OF THE DAY, SEX IS BT WHEN YOU DO WHAT MAK YOU MOST FORTABLE, SO SET BOUNDARI AND DO YOU. BUT PERHAPS THE RMATN ABOVE WILL MAKE SOME RENSIR WHY THEY AREN’T OPEN TO EXPERIENCG A FULLER SPECTM OF {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;CLEAR:BOTH;}LOVE AND {BOX-SIZG:BORR-BOX;MARG:0 TO;WIDTH:90%;M-WIDTH:288PX;MAX-WIDTH:1440PX;M-HEIGHT:194PX;}LATT NEWS
Legend would have you believe that once you’ve earned your gay rd, a Harry Potter–like ceremony occurs where, stead of the Sortg Hat, a giant magil butt plug divis all gay men to two ho: tops or is clearly not the se, pecially for those people who nsir themselv versatile (HIYA).
PENIS SIZE AND PREFERRED SEXUAL ROL AMONG GAY MEN
The two subdivisns have their own l, stereotyp, and -jok, and n sometim seem as if they’re at war wh each other, rather than both workg together for mutual sexual of this n make tryg different thgs dntg, pecially if you’re a baby gay venturg to this world for the first time.
”Miller argu that gay men should exame their relatnship wh power. But I believe that many gay men pick one si, stick to , and that some of those dividuals choose toppg—you’ll have seen their profil markg them as “masc dom tops” on the apps—bee of s ti to tradnal Miller explas, there are outsi forc that, datg back to the ancient Greeks, have prevented gay men om tly diggg to what sexual behavrs we might actually enjoy. “What I mean by that, ” he says, “is that cultural forc wh the gay muny prize toppg over bottomg.
ALL THE OPENLY GAY MALE CELEBS WHO ARE OUT, PROUD & SMOK’ HOT
“Wh bottomg there is the perceptn that you're givg up your masculy bee receivg a penis is somethg that women do, ” Miller Chris Whe, an expert health promotn and the director and prcipal vtigator of the Safe and Supportive Schools Project at the Gay-Straight Alliance Network San Francis, tak this one step further. ”To be (fucked) or not to be (fucked) shouldn’t always be the qutnAcrdg to a 2011 study by The Journal of Sexual Medice that surveyed 25, 000 gay men Ameri about their last sexual enunters, only 36 percent said they had bottomed and 34 percent said they had, realy, we’re not actually fuckg all that much. While not everyone subscrib to those labels, for many queer people, and pecially gay men, llg yourself a top, bottom, or vers n be a way to help fd potential partners and hookups.