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HOMOSEXUALY, HAM SANDWICH, AND THE FUNERAL OF A GAY MAN

Homosexualy, ham sandwich, and the funeral of a gay man * gay ham sandwich *

'Queer-Hat' Cordon Bl' Go On Sale WedndayThis Week's Most Viral News: July 28, 2023OffEnglishATLANTA—As part of s recent efforts to publicly align self wh fundamentalist Christian valu, the Chick-fil-A rtrant cha announced today the but of s new Queer-Hat' Cordon Bl sandwich that would be on sale all of the pany's 1, 600 rtrants this a prs nference to reporters, pany reprentativ said the homophobic new sandwich will clu the natnal fast food cha’s tramark ied chicken filet wrapped a piece of specially-smoked No Homo ham that would be topped wh a slice of Swiss chee and lathered a creamy new Thoand Island-based Fag Punchg sce.

"The Queer-Hat' Cordon Bl is our pany's way of showg our firm mment to strong, Christian fay valu, " said Chick-fil-A spokman Robert Gary, before addg that the vehemently anti-gay rights sandwich served a bo wh waffle i and a medium soda for jt $6. "From the very first morsel of this savory meal to the very last be, ctomers n envisn gays burng hell wh their sodomizg horts, and know that our sandwich is on their si. "While the release of the Queer-Hat’ Cordon Bl has led to anger om pro-gay rights groups, loyal Chick-fil-A ctomers claim they are happy they n fally enjoy a sandwich that tak a firm stance on the issue of homosexualy.

"Any sandwich that b that great Chick-fil-A flavor wh a hefty dose of vrlic homophobia is fely gog to keep me g back for more, " said Atlanta ctomer John Oaks. The New York Tim wh the help of Barney's creative ambassador Simon Doonan has cid this week that your food n be gay or straight.This article is om the archive of our partner .The New York Tim wh the help of Barney's creative ambassador Simon Doonan has cid this week that your food n be gay or straight.

‘THE WALKG DEAD’ SHOCKER: DARYL DIXON IS GAY, OR NOT, OR MAYBE A HAM SANDWICH?

'The Walkg Dead' creator Robert Kirkman hts AMC fan-favore Daryl Dixon might be gay, though we propose he might also fact be a ham sandwich. * gay ham sandwich *

Apparently, a "gay" food isn't jt a potato that seeks marriage equaly, remds you was born this way, or owns a summer share on Fire Island. Acrdg to Doonan, his new (satiril) book Gay Men Don't Get Fat and his terview wh The Tim today, gay food is lighter, brighter, more artistic, art-directed--food that you'd fd where health and athetics tersect (and that's very different than what Doonan labels "lbian food"--"Organic olive oil, thick porridge, heapg helpgs of wheat germ," and s ilk). Sometim fimally small nuggets."  We enjoyed Doonan's sweepg gay food generalizatns so we put them to the unscientific, anecdotal tt, assigned them a rpective Ksey ratg and me up wh your (pletely unscientific) gui to the sexualy of food, om gayt to straightt:What is: Shi; Sashimi; Cdo; Seafood Tartare; Ceviche What Doonan Says: "Japane food — that is some serly gay food ...

GAY SANDWICH

* gay ham sandwich *

Basilly, you’re takg sloppy bs of fish and makg them to the exquise ltle bonbons, and that seems ordately gay to me." What Ksey Says: The Ksey 6 is "exclively homosexual" What We Say: That sort of mak sense. You'd only eat this food a rtrant servg an assortment Doonan's other gay foods, whether 's an appetizer at an Italian rtrant or a ma at a Japane rtrant--the place probably serv lighter, stylized fare on stunng, perhaps over-worked plat. The Outlier: Spicy Mayo Anythg Rolls; Supermarket Shi; Any roll wh more than three gredients or one ied object What is: Marons  What Doonan Says: "The maron craze is the ne pl ultra of gay foorie.

If you wanted to a polician’s reer, jt publish a picture of him shoppg for marons." What Ksey Says: The Ksey 5 is "predomantly homosexual, only cintally heterosexual" What We Say: Though they look like lorful cheeburgers, y, all tak is an "cintal" n- wh Cool Whip to that gay credibily. He dodged the glob of sour cream on top." What Ksey Says: The Ksey 4 is "predomantly homosexual, but more than cintally heterosexual" What We Say: Clearly this isn't the first pairg between the black bean soup and the sour-cream pairg. " What Ksey Says: The Ksey 3 is "equally heterosexual and homosexual" or more simply, bisexual.

GAY MOSW MOSW CY GUI

What We Say: Dpe s fat ntent, Doonan mentns that Caar salad and certa pi may tilt more gay than you'd thk. There are novelty mach ma pecially for pani-makg and grillg and certaly has more flair than a ham and chee on wheat bread--Doonan refers to wheat bread as "ferocly lbian and wildly heterosexual"--but all the hidn meats and chee certaly make this food an equal straddler of gay-straight le. Bee the Black Ang meatloaf, that’s a whole lot of hetero to digt." What Ksey Says: The Ksey 2 is "predomantly heterosexual, but more than cintally homosexual" What We Say: The Tim wrer nces that although the meatloaf is unrelentgly heterosexual, non-potato-based sis like a salad substute n go a long way temperg the Burt Reynolds-ns of this dish.

You’ll bee so enormo.’" What Ksey Says: The Ksey 1 is "predomantly heterosexual, only cintally homosexual" What We Say: Doonan explas that baked chips are herently gay ... And that’s a functn of eatg too many meatloafs, too many steaks, too many jumbo burros." What Ksey Says: The Ksey 0 is "exclively heterosexual." What We Say: Burros are the clearly the hate crime of the gay food world and brg together Doonan's unholy try of meat, chee, and avodo (along wh that dodge-worthy sour cream). Here's how the article started:Breakg NewsGet the latt breakg news om North Texas and 's part of the answer I got:And:I'll post the whole story after the says no to gay unns, but says a lot of thgsMany old laws have lost their force - we don't kill smart-alecky kidsWhat's the difference between homosexualy and a ham sandwich?

It's an important qutn for many Christians who nsir their Bible s entirety to be God's thorative recent headl about gay marriage reprent the latt round an ancient bate volvg Christiany's Jewish roots.

*BEAR-MAGAZINE.COM* GAY HAM SANDWICH

Homosexualy, ham sandwich, and the funeral of a gay man .

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