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THE GRIM TTH OF BEG GAY PRISON

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If gay life was a giant ballroom (and kd of is), kky leathermen have been lgerg the back, the shadows, for generatns. Long before hookup apps like Grdr and Scff, gay and bisexual men seekg sual sex wore lored handkerchiefs their pant pockets ditg what kd of sex they were seekg and whether they were a domant/top or submissive/bottom. The lor is pretty extensive and clus var kks and fetish, and is still ed today by gay clothg brands like Nasty Pig and CellBlock 13 — and, obvly, by kky gay men.

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Legend would have you believe that once you’ve earned your gay rd, a Harry Potter–like ceremony occurs where, stead of the Sortg Hat, a giant magil butt plug divis all gay men to two ho: tops or bottoms.This is clearly not the se, pecially for those people who nsir themselv versatile (HIYA). The two subdivisns have their own l, stereotyp, and -jok, and n sometim seem as if they’re at war wh each other, rather than both workg together for mutual sexual pleasure.All of this n make tryg different thgs dntg, pecially if you’re a baby gay venturg to this world for the first time. So how do you go about ttg new waters?“I believe what I ll takg your erotic temperature,” explas Woody Miller, the thor of the books How to Bottom Like a Porn Star and How to Top Like a Stud, “which is basilly havg a nversatn wh yourself about what is you like.”Miller argu that gay men should exame their relatnship wh power.

But I believe that many gay men pick one si, stick to , and that some of those dividuals choose toppg—you’ll have seen their profil markg them as “masc dom tops” on the apps—bee of s ti to tradnal masculy.As Miller explas, there are outsi forc that, datg back to the ancient Greeks, have prevented gay men om tly diggg to what sexual behavrs we might actually enjoy. “What I mean by that,” he says, “is that cultural forc wh the gay muny prize toppg over bottomg.”The ongog fetishizatn of masculy means that the tradnally submissive role of the bottom is associated wh effemacy.

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The grim tth of beg gay prison | Sadhbh Walshe | The Guardian .

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